Is this young Moroccan man playing with me?

I met a young Moroccan man in a ” social media forum” a few month ago and we emediately hit it off. We began speaking every day. I've been to Morocco and visit him and his family. I am soon going back but are now having second thaughts.....We had a few misunderstandings, but we solved them. I am 15 years older than him. He says he can not have children and was married once before. Am I totally naive and refuse to see the signs? Is he using me for money? A better life? I am already in love with him but as they say, love is blind.....Need some input.

Maybe he can't have children. But also i advice you to listen your own inner voice. If you feel something is not right, it usually isn't.
If he really loves you, i advice you to ask strait guestion. I do that, the answer was what i sensed. Good luck💖

Thank you for your reply. Taking time to answer my post. I will follow your advice.

Sounds far too much like a scam not to be a scam.

Men, in general, want younger women, sex, cash, escape from their country if they don't like the place and see a chance - but the first 'want' will go right out of the window if there's a fair chance of the others

Hi Sara
Did he confessed by himself or you asked him.
Because if he was playing with you i don't see the point of telling you that he can't have childrens and was married before. It's my opinion. And were are you from ?

Totally agree with the post from Fred.

Sounds like a scam so proceed with caution.

Hard truth - Yes. He is using you to escape the *** he is living in. It is obvious if you read between the lines. He is much younger then you and do not want children from you. All he want is your passport then divorce you - then come back to marry a young lady which his mama and papa will pick up.. Did you know that 75% of marriages of Moroccan men with Europeans or USA ladies are scam . Based on your story i advise you one single thing : RUN RUN RUN and never look back.. Love is blind for sure so use your brain .You will thank me later but Run now before you get hurt very badly

Moderated by Diksha 5 years ago
Reason : Foul language
We invite you to read the forum code of conduct

@bluesky 2020  75% !! Could your me Where did you find this number ? What is your source

My opinion is based on statistics from EU embassies and USA embassy which they come with this number. Plus most of moroccans I have come to know who got married with foreign ladies older then them got divorced after they got papers so they can come back and get married young squizes from their own culture, religion and culture. This practise is not limited to Morocco only however. Most of third country ppl do anything for a better life without thinking the consequences that arise of betraying the love and trust of these women who belive in genuine love. Moroccan culture does not accept marriage with a non muslim and out of their turf. They will close one eye however until their son get the freedom an European passport gives then they will show they face.. The lady will be divorced within months with pretexts like :she was not a Muslim, she did not cover herself or she did not know to cook.. They are very different cultures and traditions which one day they will clash very badly and the victim will be the foreign women.. Morocco is a very patriarchal society and women is a second citizien in the family..I do not predict any better outcome of the relationship the lady of the post is in.. I hope I am wrong but it is so easy to read between the lines.

I respect your opinion , but as a moroccan i don't see things as you do.
Yes culture is different, religion too.
If you're living in morocco i hope you will meet some good moroccans . maybe you met only the worst moroccans.
There are good and bad persons everywhere not only in Morocco. Maybe women doesn't have same rights as the men, and according to my knowledge it's everywhere in the world not only in morocco.

Could you please share the link of theses statistics, I'm really curious.
And if a guy ask divorce because the women can't cook, well it's her fault. She chose an uncivilized men

Selma blue sky is biased and judgemental and paints a picture of doom.
Ask him about the gold diggers and ruthless Western women who deliberately scour the wealthy men in clubs and casinos..
Are they immoral?
Blue sky prove your facts as you have been asked as I do not see your point of view which is based on bias prejudice

Why are bluesky and the synics living in Morocco?? Go back to your own countries and leave Morroco for people that want to be there.
I am amazed how such hatred comes across and unsubstantiated opinions expressed.
Bluesky your country does not have these problems so go back and be happy

I thank you for your answer. I have one question though, if we marry with a prenuptional agreement. What could he possibly steal from me, accept perhaps my heart? We have been in a relationship for several month. If this is true, that this is all a scam.... It must be the worst scam ever. Playing with peoples feelings....

Hey Sara

Did you check how loyal he is? What if another girl who is a year or two younger than you approaches him and expresses her love to him , will he take the bite?
I am sure you have understood what I mean. Make an arrangement where some other girl/woman approaches him and see if he falls for her , saying that , that woman wants to relocate with him to her country post marriage . If he does then tread safe .

Wiw.  Some people are really negative.  I know plenty of young moroccan men happily married to older foreigners.  At least 6 or 7.  I don't know anyone who got married to a foreign woman just to get away.  I'm sure they exist, just that I don't know any.
As for me, my husband is 35 and I am 63. We've been together for 5 years  and married for 4 years.  We live in Morocco because we love it here.  We are in Tinghir province, so I'm sure that could explain why the guys here don't  all want to leave. Paradise.
My advice to you is to meet his family spend a little time getting to know them too. Have you met his friends?   I say go with your heart. 
Best of luck to you

Adrienne

Thank you for sharing. And also heartwarming to learn that it can work out. Wish you all the best in the future.

He told me the reason for divorce with previous wife was that they could not have children together and the problem lied with him. Could be true or not. Maybe it was a way of making me comfortable in our relationship, so that I would not worry about him leaving me in the future.... I do not know. He also saw our mutual problems with our exes, as the thing we had in common and what brought us closer together...

Thank you. That was a good idea to try....

Sara_7623 wrote:

I met a young Moroccan man in a ” social media forum” a few month ago and we emediately hit it off. We began speaking every day. I've been to Morocco and visit him and his family. I am soon going back but are now having second thaughts.....We had a few misunderstandings, but we solved them. I am 15 years older than him. He says he can not have children and was married once before. Am I totally naive and refuse to see the signs? Is he using me for money? A better life? I am already in love with him but as they say, love is blind.....Need some input.


I think you already have all the answers to all your questions deep inside your own mind.  And you also admit that you rather do not want to see those answers by ending your post with "love is blind". Your heart prefer to stay blind while mind is more realistic "but are now having second thoughts..."
This by the way reminds me an old Swedish ballad "Fredrik Åkare och Cecilia Lind" only difference is you have changed the side   :D Well they lived for the moment but a marriage is hopefully for a life time. A person has to get older with a partner who can understand her/him rest of the life even when the expire date is passed. Cheers!

Hey Sara
All i can say is to advice you to take your time, if you have a doubt about the fact he can have kids or not you can go see a trustworthy gynaecologist, you can ask the exact issue and tell him you want to have it checked  so you know if he is saying yhe truth or not, i am moroccan my self and i have to say that all over the years and experiences from travel i have seen many marriages broken especially if the husband is moroccan not the opposit, the truth is harsh but there are many men who wants to escape morocco and have the europeen dream between their eyes, we witness this in many moroccan movies as a reflect of this culture, i am not saying this will happen to you but if he is asking you money this is not a good sign x

Hi Sarasmum
Thank you for input. Actually he has not asked for money and he also says he do not want my money. Only love and respect. I think reading all information on the web and on different forum is what made me doubt.... I was happily naive until then. But, I am not stupid and I will take your  advice and take my time.
Best regards
Sara_7623

Hey darling
I wish u the bestest of luck, but please please take your time and be carful, i don't mean to scary you but i heard so many sad stories especially long time ago when the visa was so easy, it use to take 2 years for the moroccan partner to have their indefinite stay and all they is divorce the person, now the new law is harder and it takes 5 years to have the permanent residency, what i know being moroccan my self as i mentioned is that in our culture age difference between a man and a woman is not acceptable even by 1/2 years, on the other hand we see a 50 years old man marrying a 20 years without any problems.
My question is why does he accept such an age difference being moroccan ? Again i dont mean to scary you bit may ne trying to open your eyes about few points you should consider, the fact he cant have kids should be checked too
All the best x

Hi Sara my name is Galina and I want to know how is your relationship going  with your Moroccan man ? I'm in a similar situation like you and I don't know what to think ? I'm 46 and he is 35 , we met on the social media and I have mixing feelings also ! I'm going to visit him now on April 18 !

Hi...

I had ex bf online Moroccan. Make sure to tell him and show you will not do sex before marriage and see what will happen. Second, if you have any ways to write in your prenuptial agreement that he can't obtain visa in your country after many years like ten years perhaps.. Tell him and see how he will react. But he can still have legal access in your country even if he has no visa yet if u marry him.. That's the problem.

Odnt show him any sexual stuff and see how things will turn out....thats the best way to know if a man online is just after of flirting or not.

I cant say u are wrong but u should treat the person not the people of Morocco...i agree there are few guys who wants ladies only for paper ..think again who is these guys ? Am sure who has lower level of education .. not working..etc

Hello, I am from America. I am in Morocco now because I am marrying my Moroccan man. Let me know how it is going with your Moroccan man. Mine is 27 years old and I am 34 years old. I pray that he does not play me. I feel that he loves me and wants to be with me for the rest of his life. Most of Moroccans are good at lying and playing games. If their Moms always be around them and their loved ones and are trying to control them or doing something like that, that means they just want them to get visas or money from their loved ones for supporting them and their families. Mine is not but I have to watch their moves and read their body language since I am deaf and I can't hear.

Seriously?? If u judge like this bcz u meet. One of 40 millions people.. U should change the way how U  judge people  and thinking...

I don't get the big age gap situations regardless of if it is a man or woman.  Personally I would feel shamelessly selfish if in a relationship with someone significantly younger then me.  I had the time to enjoy being that age and think it is selfish to detour someone younger from  enjoying what that age/ time in life has to offer.  Also I would not want to be involved with someone significantly older for the same reason.  Why should I rush through enjoying what that certain stage in life has to offer to catch up with an older person?

It seems some what predatory.  I view people younger then me like an older sister.  I have been around longer and know myself better.  So why would I want to baby sit some younger person?  Why would I want someone so desperate to latch on to me?  What would that say about me?  If someone significantly younger then me approaches me with romantic intentions ... have some integrity and redirect them to some one closer in age.  If my kid showed up telling me they wanted to marry someone a decade or more older I would be FURIOUS!!!  So I would never go there.

Can anyone tell me private message coz my husband traped by morrocon women she already got french passport as my husband told me

Hello I wish that everything will be okay
But if already you having doubt on him why you are marrying him
I mean marriage it does mean sharing your lifetime with another person
But if you need help I'll be here

Can any buddy tell me is she right girl morrocon she is 25  an hv a daughter sh met my husband n married him i hv 5 kids with my husband
She told me i can be ur second wife ahe got french nationality as my husband told me

Aviva26....

Are you asking if you think it is okay that your husband who you have 5 kids with marries a Moroccan woman who already had 1 kid as his 2nd wife?

If that is your question ...

Well I did not realize polygamy was legal in Italy were you appear to be located.

Why does he need another wife?

What is he suppose to do with her that he cant do with you?  You already have 5 kids ... ( What does he want a football team)?

Is he able to meet the needs of both wives and all your kids?

Why are you allowing him to take another wife?

What are you getting out of the situation?

You know
I don't agree with polygamy
As he changed his first wife by another one
Maybe it will be the same issues with you
But if there's a genuine love trust faithfulness
You know
You can feel it ...but if there's a doubt about this relationship
I think you should take a step back
Have a good day

I don't get how a man with 5 small kids and a wife has time to be looking for another wife rather then taking care of his current family.  This is disgustingly selfish and shameless behavior.  This is also another reason why women need to be a lot smarter because a woman with that many kids likely does not have a means of supporting herself and her children allowing her to walk away.

Also a woman that desperate to want to settle for being the 2nd wife of a man with 5 kids must be one pathetic desperate woman. At 25 to settle for that is tragic.  She must be an idiot.

When families raise their daughters to settle for being treated like garbage this is the outcome.  If I was in this situation I would have every member of my family going after my husband and making sure we were getting a divorce.  How anyone could think this is okay and try and blame the 25 year old fool for her husband's poor character is tragic.

There's a lot of people saying they 'met on social media' but never specify what sort, what they were doing on it, as well as the person they're 'in a relationship with' was doing on there.... This is the first big clue as to whether it's genuine or not.

Be aware of your surroundings and listen to your inner voice, and watch how your future partner reacts when you are around them.

I've been at the airport waiting for friends to arrive, and seen young Moroccan guys chatting with similar guys whilst they wait for their 'girlfriends' to arrive, and swap stories with each other in not such a pleasant way.

Typically its acceptable for an older guy to be with a younger woman, but not so much the other way around. It was nice to read that there was a 35 year old guy and a 64 year old woman together, but it's about expectations. Do they want to leave Morocco, or do you want to move there.

One thing I've discovered in my time in Morocco, is that everyone wants a better life, everyone wants to 'work hard' but few rarely do. Most want things provided for them, with little or no effort on their part.

I don't mean this as a doom and gloom post, but you have to be realistic. A relationship, a marriage is all about companionship. About building a better life for yourself and the person youre with. So take the precious time you have for getting to know the person, seeing if you 'fit' together. Are your expectations the same. Do you want someone who is happy to sit down all day doing nothing, or is that person pushing you do do better, pushing themselves to do better, to show you theyre dedicated building a better life.

You need to be much more attentive of when you 'choose' your partner, and think with your head, and not your heart. If you can rationalise your decisions and theirs, and ask yourself the question from time to time 'will I be happy with this person's behaviour like this for the rest of my life' then you're one step closer to your decision.

You see various programs of 90 days to get married, one couple in particular they were complete polar opposites. He was a gym bunny, and she couldn't walk more than 10 paces before getting out of breath. They started their relationship online, like most, and planned a future, but they didnt look at themselves objectively. Yes opposites attract, but you need some things in common in order to have the relationship 'synergy' which gives it stability, and longevity.

Remember, youve gotta kiss a lot of frogs to find a prince. Don't settle for the first price that comes along! The world's a big place... the 'right' person could be just around the corner.

Phil

How did it go

I personally can't tell...listen to you heart and trust your guts. We can't tell not everyone is a scam not everyone is perfect. I have in relationship for 10 years with my American ex and didn't get married to be there even she wanted it I just wasn't there even I lived her and I was not doing great financially but that didn't matter that's to say not everyone in Morocco is looking for “papers” he could be he couldn't not it is all up to your heart, you meet him not USA. But all I can say listen to your deepest voices if it doesn't feel right it is not right trust that voice of it is then it is.

Cheers

I'm 22 years older than my morrocan man. I don't feel alone anymore!!