Moving to Hungary solo

Sounds like a very neutral topic, I prefer posts from loyal contributors like fluffy and marilyn. Income taxes, cost of living would be more interesting to me. I would be surprised you woud get active answers on the post. Of course many interesting in this world and I hope you can get proper remnuneration, however in my view these type of shots are not likely getting to many responses,
Still interesting for some, BUT ..

If I wasn't married to a Hungarian I doubt I'd ever set foot in Hungary.
Been a resident here for over 10 years now.
Still feel like a new comer at times.
I knew an American women in her 30's years ago from the US.
She was rather well off, her husband was in the US military so she was often alone for months on end in Hungary while her husband was stationed elsewhere.
He was never in Hungary long enough to get to know the place but she went full on and was into everything here.
Politics, even into how the school system worked, although she had no children.
She told me she didn't have a place any longer in the USA becuase she had been in Hungary at the time for 9 years.
There was nothing left in the US for her. Her family had actaully come from Hungary but she was American all the way and didn't speak Hungarian although she was learning.
Sort of sad really.
We never got too chummy becuase of our age gag, the fact she was basically single most of the time and she had a few issues wih her mental health, so she said. Would travel to the  US every so often to see her therapist.  Just a bit of a handful for me.
If you are away so long , things change, you cange and of course things will not feel or be like you remember back home.
This women only really hung out with other ex-pats s it was odd she cared so much about the topics she did.
She worked here, not for the money  but because she was lonely and bored with her husband away so much.
Hungary is fine but if you don't have a local connection I'd think your experiences would be rather strange at times.
Persoanlly we may be moving away at some point from Hungary, we say this every single winter though.

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

...
Persoanlly we may be moving away at some point from Hungary, we say this every single winter though.

We've had that discussion before here about what would happen if one's Hungarian partner/wife/husband/whatever died and one was alone (solo) here.   I am 90% certain I would leave the country once the kids were old enough and I was alone.  The other way around, Mrs F would probably stay.   

The kids I think would stay if they were say, over 21 but at least one of them already wants to leave.  The other one is too young to express an opinion.

I'm quite used to moving to other countries for jobs.  I came here alone and had no problems but I always saw it as temporary back then. 

But that's what they say about this place, even if you arrive solo, you'll never leave Hungary alone.  Wife/husband/significant other will be with you.  So Hungary will forever be hard to ignore.

Good post from Marilyn,

However please do not get met wrong, even if I do not speak Hungarian (at all) I still (in general) like the neighbours (Hungarian and German alike). Still I see things moving into a wrong direction (even if we benefitted by selling our property). Just things bad will coming after elections.

Many nice countries in the world to be considered (in our choice it has been Turkey, but honestly Namibia, Belize and Georgia would have been fine as well),
The world is big and Hungary is a part we enjoyed for 7 years.
By the way Burgas (Bulgaria) is also very very nice if  really one would like to stay in EU.

Of course I will go with my wife

cdw057 wrote:

Good post from Marilyn,

However please do not get met wrong, even if I do not speak Hungarian (at all) I still (in general) like the neighbours (Hungarian and German alike). Still I see things moving into a wrong direction (even if we benefitted by selling our property). Just things bad will coming after elections.

Many nice countries in the world to be considered (in our choice it has been Turkey, but honestly Namibia, Belize and Georgia would have been fine as well),
The world is big and Hungary is a part we enjoyed for 7 years.
By the way Burgas (Bulgaria) is also very very nice if  really one would like to stay in EU.

Have you visited Belize?
We did for 6 days back in the early 1990's.
It was on our possible retirement list.
Read so many good things, they speak English, nice weather low prices friendly people and it was only around an hour flight from the US, so we could return to the states very easily if needed.
Well,reality bites sometimes.
Yes, the people were friendly and spoke English but as far as being cheap, it is if you're willing to go local, very local. ( people were collecting and fighting over glass bttles to recycle for cash!)
We realized after arriving that all the ex-pats lived on the Cayes, off the mainland.
Had to ride a boat for about an hour t get into Belize city.
The Cayes are beautiful but you pay the price to live in a tourist attraction.
Not cheap at all.
I'm sure in the past 25 years or so the place has changed, hopefully for the better.
Maybe now the city has actual trash bins and not just piles of trash all heaped in a pile with the stray dogs looking for a meal.
It was a bit of a disappointment with open sewers running down the main streets.
Being told to not show our faces after dark because of all the drunks party people who may hurt us for being white.
No, not our our list any longer, although it was pretty during the daytime.
Nothing wrong with coming to Hungary and not having connections here, guess I'm an American at heart, we hate to change, we expect things to suit us without too much effort.
Spoiled a bit I suppose.
I worked in Las Vegas with a man from Belize. He was super nice and friendly and planned on retiring there.
He though had fmaily there and had already purchased a large piece of land to build a home on.
Even he agreed with me that it could be a rough and pricey place if you couldn't afford a good neighobrhood, a hood that might even cost more overall then western Europe or the US.
The ocean was lovely there though.
Most of the Cayes at the time didn't have large grocery stores, only little snack shops and bars, bars everywhere. All geared for tourists and day trippers.
You'd have to get to the mainland to do any real shopping.

fluffy2560 wrote:

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

...
Persoanlly we may be moving away at some point from Hungary, we say this every single winter though.

We've had that discussion before here about what would happen if one's Hungarian partner/wife/husband/whatever died and one was alone (solo) here.   I am 90% certain I would leave the country once the kids were old enough and I was alone.  The other way around, Mrs F would probably stay.   

The kids I think would stay if they were say, over 21 but at least one of them already wants to leave.  The other one is too young to express an opinion.

I'm quite used to moving to other countries for jobs.  I came here alone and had no problems but I always saw it as temporary back then. 

But that's what they say about this place, even if you arrive solo, you'll never leave Hungary alone.  Wife/husband/significant other will be with you.  So Hungary will forever be hard to ignore.

I had wondered what I'd do if God forbid I found myself solo in Hungary.
Defo not interested in ever getting remarried at this stage in life.
Hard to replace the best anyways...
I have learned that we really can never have solid plans in life.
Something unexpected seems to always happen.
Had a good freind who had everything set for a sweet retirement, then she just died from brain cancer and all her palns were for nada, 2 years ago, just before she had planned to retire, she kicked it.
Another very good friend, one of my best friends ever died in Feb.2019.
Passed within a week of feeling ill.
We all thought her husband would pass first, he is still alive and fighting cancer , still kickin' it while she just died out of nowhere.
I personally would never get involved again with a Hungarian in a romanitc way, they are far to intense for me.Sweet , loving but overly emotional at times.
I have a few options in my mind if I was ever solo.
First of course would be to tie up loose ends here because I'd probably move away ASAP.
That's if they let us out.
I could move to Japan with my son and get on his last nerve or move back to the states and room with family.
Or go off to Florida on my own.
Hawaii is another option, my friend is now a widow over there and has a few properties she rents out.
One is a nice apt. in a quiet complex with a swimming pool.
She might even give me a break on the rent.
It would probably be either Japan or the US.
Or then again, I could kick it long before my husband does.
He would leave Hungary I'm sure of it even though he is a local.
He loves Hawaii and could live in a shack if he was there, he has no care about where he lives as long as the weather is good and the surf is up.

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

....
I personally would never get involved again with a Hungarian in a romanitc way, they are far to intense for me.Sweet , loving but overly emotional at times.
I have a few options in my mind if I was ever solo.
First of course would be to tie up loose ends here because I'd probably move away ASAP.
...
He would leave Hungary I'm sure of it even though he is a local.
He loves Hawaii and could live in a shack if he was there, he has no care about where he lives as long as the weather is good and the surf is up.

Oh, I wouldn't have a problem being with anyone Hungarian or otherwise. I might struggle with someone British actually now I think of it. 

Somewhat like your relative Marilyn, I doubt I could settle for anything less than a Hungarian

My bro was told he had brain cancer on his birthday. And he died just over a year later, a few weeks after his next birthday.   He did well to survive that long.  He was planning his retirement when he got the bad news.    While it seemed like it was for nothing, his family were well taken care of financially. He was relatively wealthy and was heavily insured.   All that years of effort, working and travelling and it didn't matter that much in the end.  His widow moved away pretty fast to another area of the UK. She had to establish a new and separate life. Not unexpected.

It's hard to say in reality what anyone would do if their lives were turned upside down out of nowhere.
We can make plans but they are just plans, not full proof.
Best laid plans of mice and men...

Probably a nice thread of people dying (my father at 39, both grandfathers before 50), really incredibly sad and dishonest can some enjoy life longer than others.
Me I am almost 60 (probably genes from my mom), still not honest at all.

Not per se linked to Hungary forum though, life sucks for some, others lucky.

Apologies for the post, but I comes from my heart.
Why am I 60 and other (good heart people) are not even 50. Sad, sucks, ...

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

It's hard to say in reality what anyone would do if their lives were turned upside down out of nowhere.
We can make plans but they are just plans, not full proof.
Best laid plans of mice and men...

Agree with that 100%. 

Reminds me of the various quotes around military planning:

"No plans survive first contact with the enemy"

"Plans are useless but planning is indispensable"

"Perfect plans are like unicorns.  No-one has every seen one"

And I've even surprised myself by always having (or mapped out in my mind) Plan Bs for critical points in any plan of action.  I have had to use them on a few occasions.

cdw057 wrote:

Probably a nice thread of people dying (my father at 39, both grandfathers before 50), really incredibly sad and dishonest can some enjoy life longer than others.
Me I am almost 60 (probably genes from my mom), still not honest at all.

Not per se linked to Hungary forum though, life sucks for some, others lucky.

Apologies for the post, but I comes from my heart.
Why am I 60 and other (good heart people) are not even 50. Sad, sucks, ...

It's definitely not fair. 

I'm now the same age as my dearly departed older brother was when he died.

But we'll all get our turn on that particular journey.

fluffy2560 wrote:

cdw057 wrote:

Probably a nice thread of people dying (my father at 39, both grandfathers before 50), really incredibly sad and dishonest can some enjoy life longer than others.
Me I am almost 60 (probably genes from my mom), still not honest at all.

Not per se linked to Hungary forum though, life sucks for some, others lucky.

Apologies for the post, but I comes from my heart.
Why am I 60 and other (good heart people) are not even 50. Sad, sucks, ...

It's definitely not fair. 

I'm now the same age as my dearly departed older brother was when he died.

But we'll all get our turn on that particular journey.

My friend in Hawaii lost her husband this past Friday.
It's heartbreaking because he had been being treated for pneumonia for 6 weeks.
She had to rush him into the ER for a 12 hour exam.
They found he had advanced lung cancer.
he had no chance to fight it by then and passed at home with his children and her son there to support her. Her son is a doctor too, so sometimes things are really out of our control.
How could they miss that ? 6 wasted weeks.
She had to promise 4 things before he passed on, 1. to move on. 2. to be patient with everyone. 3 to share what she has 4.hmm, forgot now but he sounded like a very nice man who was well loved.
Not sure his age, think his early 70's.She is 60 ish.
I never really ask ages that often from people.
My husband said he had passed frm,"Heaven to Heaven".
Guess their life was really nice in Hawaii, he was a retired lawyer, they have a god income and were involved in the local community. Helped out homeless peple during the volcano erruptions.
He even paid fr rehab in S.Ca. several times for her lost son, a real loving kind person.
Then we see old,"farts" being miserable to everyone around them and being a drain on society.
Life is not fair at all but it is what it is, we must learn lessons by what we observe and try to do better everyday. To be kind to those who aren't kind t us is probably ne of the hardest lesson to learn.
I often judge people by the surface , their actions. I would hate to be judged by a bad mood or day in which a strange happens to witness a miserable mood of mine.
We all have lost people far too soon, it's hard but perhaps they learned their lessons before we did and we need more time in school?
If one lives a day or 120 years, it too soon to leave loved ones.
I remember a cool, odd and forward Muslim women I worked with in Vegas. We both were games dealers. She by chance was dating the floorman who happened to have moved to the US at age 14 from Hungary( small world).
Long story but in Bosnia  as a teenager during their troubles her 2 school friends , they all were around 16-17 years old, were attacted by military men and raped and shot. Her 2 friends died but she lived.
Was a refugee so able to come to the US.
I loved hearing her tell silly old players to know their place and be kind because some people suffered badly and there they are just enjoying themselves, drinking gambling and not having a care in the world. The way she told them off was so direct that not a one of them dared speak back to her.
Her pain turned into a lesson for these spoiled  players.
Later I just happened to work at another casino and I worked with this Muslim women's brother! Crazy small world. He had the same direct attitude and good humor as she did.
If not for all her suffering and pain she never would of gotten in the US and been able to sponser her brother and parents coming to the states too.
Don't mind me, just a bit down thinking of what my friend is going through right now. She is a 2 time widow,  I wonder why she has to suffer with such loss 2 times.

cdw057 wrote:

Sounds like a very neutral topic,

She is a forum moderator. They make the same post across all country forums to generate discussion topics:

https://www.expat.com/forum/profile.php … n=timeline

cdw057 wrote:

I prefer posts from loyal contributors like fluffy and marilyn. Income taxes, cost of living would be more interesting to me. I would be surprised you woud get active answers on the post. .

It seems the de facto reality is this forum has become a discussion group between three people, with an occasional (reasonable) injection by a site expert from Austria.

But... in theory, it is still a public forum, and anyone should feel free to reply.

So........ Comments as above are not helpful to the open forum concept. And can scare new people away from becoming regular contributors. It implies a closed group with limited acceptable topics.

For example, I have zero interest in your new life in Turkey, but you have every right to post about it (even if maybe better at the Turkey expat forum), and I should simply ignore such posts that do not interest me. Not go on about about I would prefer some other topics to be discussed (because that would be rude to you and your post and would be a form of bad netiquette (trying to hijack your topic)).

A pity the Hungarian expert does not seem to regulate this better, but maybe he has his reasons. 

radiumpotato wrote:

...

A pity the Hungarian expert does not seem to regulate this better, but maybe he has his reasons. 

Who is the Hungarian expert?

radiumpotato wrote:

....
It seems the de facto reality is this forum has become a discussion group between three people, with an occasional (reasonable) injection by a site expert from Austria.

But... in theory, it is still a public forum, and anyone should feel free to reply.

So........ Comments as above are not helpful to the open forum concept. And can scare new people away from becoming regular contributors. It implies a closed group with limited acceptable topics.

Isn't it more like small talk at a gathering?  All I can say is post something!

Of course, everyone can post whatever they want if they want to start up a conversation although a HU theme would seem to be most appropriate - however tenuous. I suspect we're one of the most active forums of the small scale countries.  I've posted in other countries and no-one replies.

Anyways, the moderators will clamp down if it goes awry.

fluffy2560 wrote:

radiumpotato wrote:

...

A pity the Hungarian expert does not seem to regulate this better, but maybe he has his reasons. 

Who is the Hungarian expert?

Sighs..... 

radiumpotato wrote:

fluffy2560 wrote:

radiumpotato wrote:

...

A pity the Hungarian expert does not seem to regulate this better, but maybe he has his reasons. 

Who is the Hungarian expert?

Sighs..... 

Come on Nuclear Krumpli, share!

fluffy2560 wrote:

Anyways, the moderators will clamp down if it goes awry.

fluffy2560 wrote:

Come on Nuclear Krumpli, share!

Oh, ***.... You know when you became an expert it came with responsibilities. Including some reasonable expectations of politely moderating the forums. And not call people names simply because you do not like what they post.

I have been there. Done that. Was an expert. Left. Came back. So, yes I know what you should be doing.

Wondering .... for this bit of "sharing" will you try to ban me (again)?

radiumpotato wrote:

fluffy2560 wrote:

Anyways, the moderators will clamp down if it goes awry.

fluffy2560 wrote:

Come on Nuclear Krumpli, share!

.... You know when you became an expert it came with responsibilities. Including some reasonable expectations of politely moderating the forums. And not call people names simply because you do not like what they post.

I have been there. Done that. Was an expert. Left. Came back. So, yes I know what you should be doing.

Wondering .... for this bit of "sharing" will you try to ban me (again)?

Got that wrong.  I am not a moderator.  Never was and never have been!   And I've never banned you. I don't have the power to do that.   Promotion to expert seems to be based on number of posts.  It's not something I've ever pursued as a status.  I'm just here.

When I said post something, I was hoping for something else more interesting.

Just a bit unclear on the relevance of Radium, as for me I think to make a comparison between Hungary and Turkey, no I am indeed not a Hungary expert, but as an expat on Hungary I have not too bad (I lived here for 7 years (happily))
Me mentioning pluses and minuses on Hungary I think is relevant.

More for Radium, what is the exact topic for the Hungary forum (if at all), a bit unclear to me. Experiences in other countries are relevant for living in Hungary (social, taxes, cost, ..)

cdw057 wrote:

Just a bit unclear on the relevance of Radium, as for me I think to make a comparison between Hungary and Turkey, no I am indeed not a Hungary expert, but as an expat on Hungary I have not too bad (I lived here for 7 years (happily))
Me mentioning pluses and minuses on Hungary I think is relevant.

More for Radium, what is the exact topic for the Hungary forum (if at all), a bit unclear to me. Experiences in other countries are relevant for living in Hungary (social, taxes, cost, ..)

He is just a grumpy Troll, so ignore him.

cdw057 wrote:

Just a bit unclear on the relevance of Radium, as for me I think to make a comparison between Hungary and Turkey, no I am indeed not a Hungary expert, but as an expat on Hungary I have not too bad (I lived here for 7 years (happily))
Me mentioning pluses and minuses on Hungary I think is relevant.

More for Radium, what is the exact topic for the Hungary forum (if at all), a bit unclear to me. Experiences in other countries are relevant for living in Hungary (social, taxes, cost, ..)

We definitely want to know the comparisons between other countries.

Mr Potato comes and goes in different guises.  Maybe he'll come back as Mr Carrot or other root vegetable once he's been rumbled.
 
The effort taken to troll is strange.  Why not just say something relevant or interesting? 

Potato is an expert on gardening/farming and knows how to make compost heaps. Lots to contribute there alone even if it's talking about sh*t so why bother with the sniping?

Might be that not always like my posts, partially to perhaps correct this situation going back to the SOLO topic, solo is not completely true, I came here with my wife. Still I was encouraged to a moderator to give some view. Moving to Hungary is a challenge in itself, but even more when you decide to go alone. If this was your case when you arrived, we would like you to share your experience. It might help other people who are also preparing for this new life in Hungary.



Do you have any tips for people who are about to move to Hungary on their own? Is the country suitable, for instance, for a single woman?
--Personally I would both city and country side for all (including single woman), apart from the odd beggar harressing you a bit my feeling is you can feel VERY safe (much more then (in my view) in Western Europe. (I am not a woman, but my wife is)


What was your state of mind when you arrived in Hungary?
--We went to Eastern Europe we have loved throuhout our life and went at least for 2 or 3 weeks over a 10 year period on holidays, yes, in a way it was a gamble, but worked out quite well.

What type of accommodation did you choose: house-share, self-contained accommodation or apartment complex?
--We bought a house in a village, quite luxury though, bottom line comfortable living

How did your integration go once settled? Do you think that being alone made it easier to make friends?
--Making friends, my wife is much better than I am, but I am quite a good chess player and joined a club (very good friendly connections over the years), also very good relations with the neighbours on the street, being alone is fine, but some good acquintances is also fine (difficult for me to mention people to call friends (friends do all until death))

Did you encounter any particular difficulties, being alone when you arrived? If you had to do it all over again, would you take a chance?
--bureaucracy can be a pain, but for the rest smooth

Thank you for your contribution!

Living in the capital city I often meet younger people who have come to Budapest to study or to work.
Its often only for 2 or 3 years.
Their employers or educational establishments usually sort out all the tax and health service requirements.
Coming on your own as a retired person is a different kettle of fish and if people are really doing the move alone I would recommend  joining as many clubs and societies as possible.
Socially I found I made more contacts in part time employment. City life is far easier for singles. There are very few social events in rural areas and people tend to just socialise at home.
I was  really lucky when I bought my holiday home in  the forest area and I met other uk people doing the same thing.
My impression of Hungarian family life is that retired older women are very much family and home based rather than out socialising.

To be honest, I've really never lived alone in my life.
Had my own flat for several months when I was 18 but decided to move in with my sister and help her with her rent.
Never enjoyed being that alone.
Spent one night alone in Hawaii, we were moving between houses and my dog and I played night guard watching the items we had moved into the new home. Had my dog so even then wasn't really alone.
It was far too quiet and I had a hard time falling asleep being alone during the night.
Strange because I think of myself as a loner.
This topic made me wish to share what has recently happened with my cousin.
He lived alone in a large apt. complex in New Mexico.
He had plenty of friends who checked in on him and brought him take out ect.
He was only 62 and disabled , had bi-polar issues.
Well, he passed away last Saturday from a probable heart attack.
He wasn't found until some time on Monday.
His poor little dog must of been freaking out those couple of days being alone with his body.
I hear so many stories about people being discovered after the smell  is too much for those living near by.
My sister lived in an apt. where a gay man was murdered by his lover,( very crude way of dying) he must of been in the apt. for well over a week before neighbors got ahold of the manager.
In Paris, my husband lived in a house where another lone man had passed away, been there over a week. The smell got to everyone in the house.
Guess that's a risk one takes when they are all by themselves.
I think I'm not brave enough to ever live alone.

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

To be honest, I've really never lived alone in my life.
Had my own flat for several months when I was 18 but decided to move in with my sister and help her with her rent.
Never enjoyed being that alone.
Spent one night alone in Hawaii, we were moving between houses and my dog and I played night guard watching the items we had moved into the new home. Had my dog so even then wasn't really alone.
It was far too quiet and I had a hard time falling asleep being alone during the night.
Strange because I think of myself as a loner.
This topic made me wish to share what has recently happened with my cousin.
He lived alone in a large apt. complex in New Mexico.
He had plenty of friends who checked in on him and brought him take out ect.
He was only 62 and disabled , had bi-polar issues.
Well, he passed away last Saturday from a probable heart attack.
He wasn't found until some time on Monday.
His poor little dog must of been freaking out those couple of days being alone with his body.
I hear so many stories about people being discovered after the smell  is too much for those living near by.
My sister lived in an apt. where a gay man was murdered by his lover,( very crude way of dying) he must of been in the apt. for well over a week before neighbors got ahold of the manager.
In Paris, my husband lived in a house where another lone man had passed away, been there over a week. The smell got to everyone in the house.
Guess that's a risk one takes when they are all by themselves.
I think I'm not brave enough to ever live alone.

Sorry about your cousin.  62 is no age.

Sometimes I like being alone just to have a rest from the mayhem of kids and cats and dogs, neighbours, phone, internet and even just people (some of those we come across are clearly lunatics). 

Everyone needs a break once in a while.  I could easily imagine enjoying going off to a cabin in the woods for a week and leading a simple life.  Eating healthily, fresh air, walking, and playing with the dog. 

I suppose it might really be just having a holiday.  I cannot see anyone getting away anytime soon what with Omicron variant hot on everyone's heels.

I guess moving to Hungary would be difficult ATM solo or not.
No ne is really going anywhere unless it is bussiness.
My cousins daughter is on a business trip to Nairobi of all places.
Her husband is overseas on business as well.
I must figure out how they managed that feat.

Yes, it's sad my cousin passed so young although just a couple years back his son passed at age 39 from a heart attack.
Doesn't help to be a heavy set person.

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

I guess moving to Hungary would be difficult ATM solo or not.
No ne is really going anywhere unless it is bussiness.
My cousins daughter is on a business trip to Nairobi of all places.
Her husband is overseas on business as well.
I must figure out how they managed that feat.

Yes, it's sad my cousin passed so young although just a couple years back his son passed at age 39 from a heart attack.
Doesn't help to be a heavy set person.

I wouldn't come here if I wasn't already heavily involved.  Could be that Putin is going to be on our doorstep by next year.

I've been to Nairobi airport in transit.  The airport nickname used to be Ni-Robbery.  Like Heathrow was known as Thief-row (Heathrow).  Days long gone one would hope. 

The worst ones for rummaging through your luggage is the TSA and DHS and their Canadian equivalents.  You get a note in your bag saying they've looked through your dirty underwear.  If only they'd washed and ironed it and put it back neatly folded. They also hassle you at the airport luggage scanners and their wandering hands.  Always feel violated.   

I'm hardly the profile for a terrorism supporter.  They need to be a bit more intelligent and quite a bit less annoying and certainly more polite!

Heavy set people do have some extreme options to reduce their weight other than diet - surgery for gastric bypass/banding etc.  From what I've read, it can be very successful.  Might not have saved your cousin but it would have been an option he'd have discussed with his doctors at one point.