The Algerian man

If he is of the Islamic faith, you should be asking yourself (and others) how do you know he's not already married. There is always that possibility too.

Perhaps, (not wanting to rain on your parade) and especially if you've never met in person, you should think about the drastic changes to your life as you know it now that becoming involved with someone from a different nation, culture and religion will mean. How all of that effects you as a woman, your legal rights, you basic human rights and the questions of where you'll live, who will make the key decisions such as having children or not, how they will be raised and educated, etc.

To many horror stories are spread all over the internet about women who've married men from other cultures that are male oriented and have lost all control over their own lives and those of their children. Do you really want to become just another statistic?

You should also be aware that many men out there are looking to women simply as a means of obtaining permanent residency in wealthier nations, that they couldn't possibly gain entry to otherwise.

Time to take off the rose colored glasses, put on your thinking cap and take a long hard look at your situation, with these things in mind, before you do anything at all.

Cheers,
William James Woodward, Expat-blog Experts Team

Thank you for the much detailed and thoughtful input. I am confident of all things it's not a problem for me. We are both believers of Islam. What I'm afraid of is exactly that of the question you have imposed. Marriage. I  am certainly clued up and know to have my thinking cap on and not my heart galloping all over. Another reason as to why I'm not going to say this is love! Hence the reason, I am now asking...even if we do meet as he wants to meet in Tunisia not Algeria (hmm) it will still leave me thinking, is he married/ engaged? I don't think I will ever know?? It seems most couples meet in Tunisia very common but y? When I offered to come Algeria to meet he said no way!!? If people see us together it will give his family a bad name. I can understand as being Muslim it's taboo. However I did say we can meet in the algeirs city away from his town but the answer was no. Do you think I should ask to meet his fam on skype or should I ask him to meet mine over skype?? Perhaps his answer in return may answer everything in one go for me if you can see what I'm doing here😉

I truly think that in any case you should never embark on a more serious relationship until such time as you have some kind of personal contact with his family and not just base things on what he says that they say or feel. You want to hear it from their own lips to make sure that THEY are ok with all of this, since it is them and their reaction to you that you're going to constantly have to deal with as a couple.

Yes, if you're family gets to know theirs as well this would also be a giant step toward a successful relationship. Since religious differences do not seem to be a problem I can see no valid reason that both families shouldn't get together (at least on Skype) to share their views on all this. The two of you certainly won't be living in a vacuum, you need the support of both families.

I agree with you, I find it rather odd that he's so opposed to you coming to his city. I can't see how being seen with you, if you're also of the Islamic faith, is going to give his family a bad name. Certainly there is much less bias against the fact that you're a foreigner than there would be if you were both a foreigner and not converted to Islam. Sorry, it just seems off to me.

I think you're right in feeling that if he balks at contact with the family that is going to be the answer to the questions that he has not seemed to be forthcoming with.

Wishing you the very best of luck, whatever way it goes. Just remember counsel from a wise OLD man (me), that no matter what happens, things always somehow manage to turn out for the best; so if it's less than you hoped for there is a good reason. Be happy eiter way! 

Cheers,
William James Woodward, Expat-blog Experts Team

Thank you so much MR Woodward. I absolutely take your advice given the fact that you are much senior to me in life and I'm only in my 20's, I'm sure you know what your talking about and I will do just that. Thank you for consoling me in much advance just makes me more braver to go ahead and put this down to him tonight in the next 3 hrs to be precise. I will be back to let you know the outcome for sure ☺️thank you

Dear Mr Woodward. He agreed to meet my family but after we have met as he wants us to be sure that we match and then take it from there. He is also concerned my parents after meeting him via skype will disapprove as he is in another country, far, wants just a ticket to come to the uk and he's saying it's wrong. My parents also May advice me to find someone in the uk.

What do you think?

you can ask him for a Certificate of No Marriage !!!...:d
if you are going to marry him they will ask him in the consulate for some papers which prove that he's not married
and they will  investigate everything about him....
i'm algerian muslim and i'll never marry more than one wife
we are not like this   Do not Believe Everything You Read and everywhere you go there are good and bad people
if you don't trust him why you want to meet him ?!!!!
follow your heart :p

I just popped in to this discussion. Why he thinks that your parents wont approve this relationship?
Do your parents know about him?

Still don't know why he doesn't allow you to visit him in Algeria. It seems  he is hiding something for you.
You can always bring someone with you who can be with you at the meeting, and he can that too, so there is no shame to meet in public.

I'm from Algeria married with romanien from 5 years i meet her im Tunisian we leave in Algeria i have beautiful daughter, bad people's everywhere you can find alone if he love you or not good luck

I ended the relationship with him. It's just not worth my life. 😢

investigation wrote:

I ended the relationship with him. It's just not worth my life. 😢

Brilliant idea that you will NEVER regret. Read your story. I had a similar experience. Like you, I'm also from London (and they refused meetings, for reasons I could never understand), but it was with a Moroccan, not an Algerian. I'm glad you took action before ruining your life. Best of luck for the future! 

investigation wrote:

I ended the relationship with him. It's just not worth my life. 😢

(Moderated: do not post generalised comments on the forum pls)

@XB23. Hey, thanks for the support. I will live your funny especially the indication of red passport 😂. Yeh I never understood the point of delaying a meeting yet he was the one who wanted to meet in the 1st place. I do wonder the endless possibilities 👮👮👮😏

investigation wrote:

@XB23. Hey, thanks for the support. I will live your funny especially the indication of red passport 😂. Yeh I never understood the point of delaying a meeting yet he was the one who wanted to meet in the 1st place. I do wonder the endless possibilities 👮👮👮😏

Yes I understand. I went through a lot of problems & confusion with my ex. A lot of delays and things that didn't make any sense to me. It was best to leave, as things will only get worse once they arrive here. I'm glad you made the right choice from early. Some unfortunately make it too late, and it ends up in divorce.