when first dating local women i didnt heed the sage advise of my local relatives and went off on my own. being arrogant and confident i thought i had nothing new to learn considering my advanced age. i was humbled. several posts have inspired me to start this thread to help newbies navigate the world of dating Vietnamese women. anyone can add their opinions and advice but please refrain from bashing the Vietnamese women. they are beautiful, hard working and very loyal. i love them. ofcourse there are exceptions to every rule so dont take these advice/opinions as canon.
1 - throw out most of your western dating habits and rituals they dont apply here.
2 - being an expat youre considered a prized catch. youre the doctors, lawyers and C celebrities of the western world. women will gravitate to you because of your blue eyes, passport or high tax bracket. women that looks like car models approach and insists youre "đẹp trai" - trust me youre not that "đẹp trai."
3 - many women see dating as the first step to matrimony. this is first thing i learned on my dating adventure. the dating period can be as long as you want just know that at the end of the "date" youre expected to come bearing areca nuts and betel leaves.
4 - some women will sacrifice love for financial security for their family. but they will love you regardless of their original intentions. you can drive yourself crazy wondering if she loves you for who you are or what you can give her. if you can accept the fact that she loves you and will take good care of you then youre good.
5 - refrain from PDAs. public display of affection is a no-no. no holding hands or kissing. i remember trying to kiss my ex on her cheek on our 5th date. she reacted like i had smacked her. or maybe i had bad breath
6 - women expect the men to be the drivers. so if you dont have a scooter or scared to drive get a taxi. i remember several times my dates would refuse to sit on the back of my electric scooter. "quê quá" - image is everything.
7 - getting phone numbers from local women is not a big deal as it is in the western world. they give them out like candy without hesitation.
8 - unless she lost her family when you marry a Viet woman you marry her family. if you dont get along with your in-laws youre screwed.
9 - on the first few dates you can sometimes expect friends, family or co-workers to attend.
10 - if youre dating/marrying a catholic/christian woman there are a whole new set of rules.
11 - if you have a quirky, dark, sarcastic sense of humor refrain from it until you get to know her better. humor sometimes does not translate well.
12 - see # 28
there are many more to come...anyone male/female feel free to add to the list although its meant to be helpful its also meant to be fun so dont take it too seriously.