Why is it that most vietnamese i meet are untrustworthy?

MarkinNam wrote:

Can someone find for all us forieners, a web site explaining Vietnamese culture regarding, Truth, honesty, the true costs of loosing face in an international community??

You will find a book in any library related to this, it will be next to the book "Men Who Undertsand Women."

I've just heard a story about Balinese workers and think it fits, a friend said that he started a business there ( Bali) and the agreed pay was $2 / day, the man, feeling kindly saw the workers were good but smoked a lot, started buying cigarettes for the workers. Then he decided to increase the pay / day to $5, Well the next thing the hard workers were transformed into lay abouts. Trying to figure this, he asked some more experienced friends. Well you see, before, they were getting enough for each day Don't worry about tomorrow !!!!!. so he cut their pay back, no more cigarettes, and guess what???? the workers went back to doing the job at hand. Moral of the story, they don't think of tomorrow,, TROI OI !!!!!

colinoscapee wrote:

MarkinNam wrote:

Can someone find for all us forieners, a web site explaining Vietnamese culture regarding, Truth, honesty, the true costs of loosing face in an international community??

You will find a book in any library related to this, it will be next to the book "Men Who Undertsand Women."

Yeah, that one is a really, really quick read.

I generally believe that good folk outnumber bad, but to be honest the only truly trustworthy people I've ever met have been dogs. And even they are devious buggers when they think they can get away with it.

Listen to real people, living in the real streets, You cant live or really on Stats to keep you safe from thieves etc, Look at the barbed wire on every house and listen to the old lady that tells you to put your motorbike in the kitchen.

Viet are extremely paranoid about security. two padlocks and security screen is considered a bare minimum.

they also tell you warning about people will come to steal and rob and kill you if you don't.

then i ask them how many times that actually happen to them OR anyone they actually know. and the answer is always none.

go figure.

and this is from someone who actually has had his computer stolen twice! but this only happen because of opportunistic theft when i was careless or forgetful - but no one attack me or kill me!

generally in my own experience i find Viet very honest. 

but that doesn't mean be stupid, or expect that some people not take a commission for things.

Actually, this book is pretty good for foreigners living in Vietnam:

Understanding Vietnam
by Neil L. Jamieson

See:
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/223 … ng_Vietnam

macintyre wrote:

Viet are extremely paranoid about security. two padlocks and security screen is considered a bare minimum.

What's also interesting is that when it comes to privacy, they don't really care much. For example, you've got Zalo which by default shows your distance in KM from other users. That's something you'd never see by default in a Western app.

Like in any country, there are those who are generally honest, those who lie some of the time, and pathological liars. A good mix. If there is a tendency towards lying or dishonesty, it's in my opinion, a due to a different moral education, that of survival of the fittest, secular humanism, which is the common ideology here.

Westerners are used to moral education from the church and nonprofit humanitarian organizations, and our culture differs somewhat.

Perhaps those us who are foreigners could lead by example for those who still need to learn?

... i thought i had disabled that?

but on point, yes, it is interesting that most want to display what they have and what we would normally call 'show off' their possessions: hence the distinct lack of window and door films and screens.

(and it has always amazed/shocked me that so many of them who make almost nothing will still spend many millions to get latest iphone.)

... btw, is no installation constant practice in dwellings? like, go figure.

wildwildwest wrote:

Like in any country, there are those who are generally honest, those who lie some of the time, and pathological liars. A good mix. If there is a tendency towards lying or dishonesty, it's in my opinion, a due to a different moral education, that of survival of the fittest, secular humanism, which is the common ideology here.

In my opinion, the lying. cheating and survival of the fittest was caused by 1 thing, the enslavement of the VN people on 30/4/75.  You can review history and every Communists country results in similar behaviors from the public, VN is no exception.

macintyre wrote:

Viet are extremely paranoid about security. two padlocks and security screen is considered a bare minimum.

they also tell you warning about people will come to steal and rob and kill you if you don't.

then i ask them how many times that actually happen to them OR anyone they actually know. and the answer is always none.

Based on my experiences, it is the tight security that prevents the crimes and that is why they answer "always none".  My inlaws lock up their home like fort knox every night, it is impossible to steal without waking everybody up. 

For example, a neighbor left a window open at the back of their house one night.  For sure, robbers came and stole things while they were sleeping!  I think it was an inside job because how would robbers know that a window in the back of the home was not locked when they cannot see it from the street?  Trust me, if people did not lock up their homes like fort knox, there would be a lot of robberies, 

The sad part, some families have a hard time keeping their own families from the stealing from their home, go figure.

Friday night I left my cash wallet in my taxi in Ho Chi Minh City (I keep credit cards in a 2nd small wallet and identification separate from both of those wallets).

Before I could walk inside my hotel, the taxi driver came running and handed me my wallet.

Maybe because I had tipped him ₫10,000 VNĐ?

Anyway, I gave him a much larger tip in reward for his honesty.

In one year since returning here, it's the first time I lost my wallet.

However, I have had my phone returned to me after misplacing it several times, and I have yet to be shortchanged by any merchants.

My anecdote is just as valid as anyone else's generalization...