If you take thaiwife to western country, how much providing?

@expatfan1111 Help him find his own job and insist that he shares the living expenses.

@Terrymedlicott

i would help her find own job and support her in many ways.

but i know this, that the relationship dynamics change when changing country....

the girl would be not satisfied with me anymore after getting out of thailand to a western country. specially after she would get her independence (perm. visa, citizenship etc..).

So this is why im asking, is there a financial way to keep her happy to be with me still after she would turn more western? there would be younger guys trying to pick him up, and it would change her mind...unless i would provide her.

and this is what im trying to find, what is the "price" to keep her loyal? how much in numbers...

If you ask this to a woman she would probably say ... give her love, love and love .. but unfortunately real life is not so simple ... For a relationship to be lasting, loyal, and happy, it can't be based solely on money, there has to be more. However, the certainty of a stable and financially secure life is very important to a woman ... sometime even more important than love. In your case, you have to consider that the more your wife is an attractive woman (the age is relative) the closer men will come ... but you must always consider that an intelligent woman is not likely to venture into other men or other relationships if she does not have the certainty of living a happy life. So, don't worry too much about her leaving you .. worry instead about making her feel secure financially and providing her with the love and warmth she needs ... anyway .. life is unpredictable and anything can happen .. organize her life so that living with you she is financially stable and happy ... and watch out for bears approaching honey. So if you ask how much is the price of all this ... it's not very difficult to calculate ... you always have to be a step above the average lifestyle of the country you are going to live in and you have to avoid bears getting too close to the honey ... Another important thing is the culture of the country your wife is from ... look at the thai culture and you will find the answer ..

I can tell you that when I was in the military I saw this happen very often when I was stationed

in Korea. Many GI's would find a Korean wife and take her back to the states and within 1 or 2

years they would divorce the soldier. These women were almost strictly bar girls and prostitutes.

One of the big differences is in the USA there is a support system for these women. When they

return to the states the GI is stationed at a fort that has bars in the city outside the base. When

I was at Fort Riley Kansas they were about 20 bars and about 18 of them were filled with

Korean women. And that's where they would work and have other Korean women to help

them and give support.

I don't know that any such support system exists in the USA for Thai women other than family

if they have any in the states.

I would never take my Thai wife to Denmark.

That come from talking to Thai in Denmark before moving here.

And talk to Thai here in Thailand that come on holiday from XXX country.

They all say the same thing, That they regret it, And if they have know what they know today (that day i talk to them), They have stay in Thailand.

They all say, When kids finish getting education and find work, That they move back to Thailand, And they dont care if the husband come or not.

But let imaging we move to Denmark, My Thai wife have to learn Danish, Danish history, And work full time.

So she have to help paying for everything like it is normal that married couple do in Denmark.

If one come to Thailand to "buy" a wife, What does is matter if she leave after X years ?

Go back and buy a new one, After all it is only companionship & sex you going to buy.

Make sure to do prenuptial agreement to protect yourself.

Satisfied and loyal maybe in your dream.

Well that my take on it.

Kindly.

@Dan_1975

Excellent answer.

Well i think we should try to roughly calculate how much is needed.

If we put details away, and do this like science just a moment. (Its about human being, dont mean to hurt anyone with this. And its not prostitution, its providing, helping other for love).

So, you said these things:

a: the more attractive, more wanted

b: how about age, you said age is relative, didnt understand what you meant?

c: have to be able to pay for lifestyle which is over average, in modern western country.

d: and my own add: have to be able to pay more than others will pay.

e: and allso there is question: is the money needed to provide coming more low, when the woman gets more age and children? if we think its age differential relationship. (for example when woman is 25 versus 45 yrs old. the 45yrs old doesnt want and need so much providing money?)

f: there might be other factors too, than paying just money, to keep woman happy. But, i believe they dont matter in this calculation at least, we can leave them aside (things like respectin other, basic good human behavior, doing her favors, etc normal good stuff),

allso good genetics doesnt help etc (if we talk about relationship like this, its not because of the genes.).

so these things mentioned here dont help, they are kind of "basic things needed all times", but provide money would be needed the most.

g: allso we should consider, how much there is really competition? i mean competitioners who want the girl and are ready to provide her financial security. Ofcourse guys would like her, but at what price? shes not gonnabe there to mess around with other guys just for waste of time.

And lets say things would go so far, that there would be marriage after 6months of meeting, the wife propably would not cheat after this point (if the basic nice behaviour continues, and more importantly giving financial security) the meeting time before marriage is kind of testing time, if the money acts well, and understands how much to be willing to provide (doesnt necessary need to provide anything but small things, more important is what the woman sees how much man is willing to provide when things get serious).

now lets calculate.

i met one asian girl while ago, i met her twice, and messaging few weeks. this is why i started to be interested of this thing. in my understanding i wasnt able to provide enough. second time we met, girl talk about that we will marry. but when things went to money, i was bargaining too much.

you know i offered her:

-at first free living in 1 room apartment with me

-after when we would marry, i would get a bigger apartment, for rent. and pay the rent. but apartment was little far away that she liked, and kinda rubbish apartment. allso when there would be children later, it would be too small.

so i figured out later, that it would need more near her workplace and train station, and 4rooms modern apartment.

maybe 3 rooms at start if the location is good and place is nice, but like i noticed, it would be very bad to start bargaining before marriage. (think if we would live few months, then her pregnant, then move again...this would be stressfull, not good).

-then i offered to buy basic furniture.

-then we talked about language learning course. i was searching for free courses and suggested them , she showed me a introduction of course which cost 1500USD, again, very bad bargaining from my part.

-then there where talks of visiting her country before marriage, meet the parents. well flights would cost, i was like "can we do it online?" again not good. (allso i couldnt maybe go before marriage, because propapbly could not get time off from work).

allso she talked about going there again in the summer for month...

-i allready pay small stuff at our first two meetings. coffee, food. i bought netflix at home, and i ordered her a language book which i then return...

-at this point when we talked about all this, she started to tell me "very expensive..is it?" and look at me in meaningfull way , well, soon after the discussion she wanted to go home, had laundry...so she says.

after this, i never heard her again, and she deleted me from facebook friends.

well i knew all the time, that things arent for free. but i didnt know the price, which is good price, so i would calculate the budget by myself. all i knew, i had to bargaing, to negotiate. if the girl would demand more, then i dont know if i could pay for more. she didnt demand. this is why i want to calculate how much i need, so i can possibly plan my life, or plan is it possible to succeed in marrying a girl like this. (ofcourse bank accoutn passwords very hidden etc..).

-allso im little difficult situation, i have mortgage in small apartment. i would have to rent it, when we live together, it would be risky, if someone is renting or i just lose money for 2 apartments. allso the economy is bad, its no-no to sell apartment now. and allso i just started my long route to financial freedom (i have plan. but it would take about 24 years to do it..). propapbly the girl was interested me at first because of this, she did sense that i could understand financial aspects.

(btw at the end the girl asked about how long this plan would take, propably this finally broke her back when she realize i would be poor for long time ).

Otherwise the girl was humble with money. She wanted to get food only from store, and only "normal things", she didnt care for sports car etc. In her words: "just normal". But she allso did priorize. her day to day travelling to work and comfy home was important, and allso her travelling and furniture, so maybe this was the "over the average" you talked about? this girl really didnt care to live more far away from work. and allso not in a small hole when offered for free.

okay, so in my experience this kind of girl would cost annyally something like (if we add together everything i told here):

-language course 1500usd+rent 12months 16800usd (i would be living too there, so i would benefit) + 2300usd basic furniture (sofa, bed, table, closet) + two flights / year to her country and back 5500usd? + 1800usd just for small gifts , coffee food and surprise needs + 1000usd for just in case in this calculation, to keep her satisfied and not need to outside marriage...

= 28900 USD. Lets make it 30000USD, to be on the sure side.

Does this sound realistic to you? i could take it.

now lets see those things i wrote about earlier:

a: more attractive, more wanted.

well this girl was 27yrs old single mom. not obese, but not slim. normal woman lenght, kind of normal looking in the face, sometimes little ugly even, but allso sometimes very hot. especially in pictures (she had crazy sexy maybe little edited photos). All in all, i would say that she was "in my level" what comes to outlooks, but the thing is, she was more young than me. (so i would not get this kind of girl in my country, only older, and they are obese and i dont feel anything with them).

and about feelings, i feel very good with this woman. even strong sense of pleasure, just to be with her.

-so, not great not terrible not supermodel, but young and littlebit hot.

b: age, was 12yrs younger than me.

c: so, in my example calculation, would this free money of 30000usd be enough for her to be over the average living in our country?

she had her salary too, but it was small, like 1700usd a month. if i could give her 2500usd a month, would this keep her happy?

Sounds a lot, but in the other hand, when i started to bargain, she left me. so...theres no place to bargain. or is it? could 2200usd a month be enough? its  26,5usd a year....well for the calculation, lets say 30000usd is better, more safe side. propably its more like this anyways. or even more which im afraid.. (could it be?).

d: would others pay more than this? this is the most important question. i know there are some people who are willing to pay for a girl, or to give help money. but are there many? propably many enough to watch my back and be sure side. this girls friend was getting married to my countryman. i really dont know how to compare what other people would pay.

-> if we get very scientific, and compare this to going to prostitute services, it would cost the same, with same level of attractiveness woman for every single night in a year. about 25000-30000usd. but is it all there is? because in relationship with wife there are more positive feelings. are they for free? you know the spend time together. for example learning language together, eating, watchin movie, etc. does this time cost, or is it included in price if we put it this way?

-> real answer to this is: if the girl starts to get annoyed by the bargain, then i know that she will leave if i dont pay.

e: again, i dont want to be rude, but when we compare to prostitutes, when they get more age, they will cost less. does the provide money needed go more low with time? i dont know. for to the age of 45 its propapbly same high, and starts to go down i guess.

but at this age, the woman will have more education and language learning, and can get her own money better too.

but allso, cant forget the age difference, woman is still companion and younger. so it could be same providing money? or is it?

or is it possible to change to younger one with same money? hard questions, no time to think it now.

and how about if there is more age difference, would the providing money needed go more up? i mean, if im like 65, and meeting like 27yrs old asian girl like in this example, would the money needed be the same? or would be it, that there is no money enough to get so young? i dont know. im afraid that age difference matters too, because i sure dont have this kind of money yet.

Guys please, don't expect anything from bar girls they are prostitutes, I have seen it first hand it damages them mentally sleeping with farang and there whole life is about getting as much money from as many farang at once until they meet their rich sugar daddy or husband,

a normal Thai doesn't go around dripping in gold and talk about showing off,

they bar girl will drop you so quickly as soon as you leave them for another punter  but always tell you that they love you,

I went too Thailand with my friends yrs ago I hadn't had a holiday in 12 yrs so eventually went with them not knowing they were going to be paying for prostitution every night.

you need to find yourself a middle class partner similar age or 5 yrs younger, that doesn't need your money, then when you provide for them they appreciate it not expect you to pay for everything including their village and buffalo food back in Esarn.

my wife is 6 yrs old than me, when I hit hardship she kept me waited on me because she loved me, she's the most humble person I have ever met and wouldn't hurt a fly let alone another persons feelings, they are out there, you just have to stay away from the prostitution.

Hi.
So if you travel to thailand to find a wife, and bring him back home to a western country, how much you should provide money for the wife?
im figuring out something like, when you are in the thailand, something like 300usd a month will be enough providing money.
But when you take the wife to a western country, dynamics will propably change.
im talkin about younger wife with big age difference. (there will be competition, id have to beat competition with money..)
so, if you take the wife to western country, she propably will be gone fast...
but has anyone ever tried to do this, and find a provide money which will keep the wife beside man after taken out of the country, and if, how much is the amount which will keep the wife satisfied and loyal? maybe 50000usd a year?
-@expatfan1111

What a depressingly cynical post. Did your hypothetical younger wife work in a bar by any chance? I don't wish to denigrate all bar girls because they only do that job out of economic necessity and not all are totally mercenary. If you catch them within a few weeks of starting the job before they become jaded you may have a chance, but ask yourself: would I choose a life partner in my own country who worked as a prostitute? If not, why would you do so in Thailand? You expect your future wife to prioritise money over all else, and with an expectation like that, it is likely to be fulfilled.

My own relationship with the lady who is now my wife evolved over many years and, initially suspicious that her interest in me might be purely pecuniary, I gave her nothing more than small gifts over a four year period. She remained interested in me, and it was that that convinced me that were intentions were honest. We genuinely love and care about each other, and whilst I obviously support her financially now that she's my wife and I don't doubt that this financial security is important to her, the bedrock of our relationship is mutual affection and respect, and I have no reason to think that this would change were she to move to my country.

You can find good or bad Bar Girls.

Same way you can find good or bad girls that never work in a bar.

Seeing it all, Good and bad once, What that do for a living is not the problem.

It all come down to, What kind of person she is.

Something that often forgotten on forum where mostly foreigner write.

It is NOT all ways the girl(s) fault when thing go bad. Very often it is the foreigner own fault.

Sadly to many foreigner dont get that part of it.

Kindly.

@Never done that

As Retiree said “ if you get them early enough, but then they are bound to be in their 20s and farang are 40 or older normally, so ask yourself what would you have in common with a 20 yr old in your own country ?

now ask she's a 20 yr old prostitute you would run a mile.

you can take the girl out of the bar but not the bar out of the girl. Seen it here in the U.K. that's why my Thai wife won't mix with Thai here in the U.K. as she had friends before telling her to dump me when I was really Unwell,

my wife comes from a a good middle class family when we visited them they paid for everything never asked farang for anything even though I offered to pay for a family meal.

now I am well enough and in my middle 50s I am going to take early retirement and I let my wife choose what she want to do she's wants to leave London but not go back home she want to be near her grandchildren in Scotland.

please try bud stay away from the bar scene it will bring you trouble in the long run, and you will probably get hurt financially or mentally.

@Issanguy well, if i would need my age girl, i would not try to find it this way? lets stick to the thread people.

What a depressingly cynical post. Did your hypothetical younger wife work in a bar by any chance? I don't wish to denigrate all bar girls because they only do that job out of economic necessity and not all are totally mercenary. If you catch them within a few weeks of starting the job before they become jaded you may have a chance, but ask yourself: would I choose a life partner in my own country who worked as a prostitute? If not, why would you do so in Thailand? You expect your future wife to prioritise money over all else, and with an expectation like that, it is likely to be fulfilled.
My own relationship with the lady who is now my wife evolved over many years and, initially suspicious that her interest in me might be purely pecuniary, I gave her nothing more than small gifts over a four year period. She remained interested in me, and it was that that convinced me that were intentions were honest. We genuinely love and care about each other, and whilst I obviously support her financially now that she's my wife and I don't doubt that this financial security is important to her, the bedrock of our relationship is mutual affection and respect, and I have no reason to think that this would change were she to move to my country.
-@Retiree

ofcourse i would have relationship with prostitute. i dont care what the girl is.

now, before things get roughly out of the idea in thread, lets not get to this part of conversation what i see coming.

if i would search money free, same age girl, would i be asking this kind of questions here?

i know where this talk is going, the girl is going to rob me, my life savings are gone, etc.

we dont need to go in to that conversation. allso, i tell this allready: im not gonna use my life savings to this thing.

okay?

now lets everyone talk about growing together, life is sunshine and all with same age free girl somewhere else, weve all been there. that thing does not to be conversated here for my part.

@Issanguy i dont know why i keep answering these....

i didnt meet a bar girl. i know what you mean, thanks for the advice.

but if we want to use term "bar girl", for a girl looking for marriage with providing older man,

how hard would it be to see if the wife would be "ruining you mentally etc..."?

if you take a calculated risk, and you secure everything, and the wife knows that when she goes by the rules, the helping continues...if she breaks the rules, the helping stops right there.

why would in this case, if it exists, be something that "ruins everything"? if we suppose, id had the money, and that money would not be my life savings? and as such, the relationship would continue?

the girl who has come to west knows the rules. shes looking for providing marriage. she knows if she lies the man knows it. and thats the end of relationship. the girl is wise and chooses to stay, because wants to provide her lifestyle which is otherwise unreachable.

i really wish that we should keep those "dont touch to girls who you need to provide...they will rob your life savings" chats elsewhere. You have to be very, very dumb to get in such a situation.

If you want to talk about cases where female has been cheating, lets say a bar girl, please tell somekind of really twisted interesting stories, i dont want to hear about any drunken old guy who takes 20yer old bargirl to england and wonders why did the girl took money and leave. we all understand this logic, ofcourse this happens when you think about relationship symmetricts. otherwise every ugly old guy would have this kind of girl!

-so, only interesting "bar girl robbed me" stories, if you really insist to tell them. not this basic bullshit we all know

A friend of mine married a Filipino girl, 15 years of difference between them, he has a good manager salary and they have a little daughter. They have been happy for many years. Filipino culture is a bit different from Thai culture. As I said it depends on the culture and above all on the person. You can find good and bad people all over the world, both in your country and in Thailand ... knowing the culture of the country is important and avoids conflicts and misunderstandings. If the girl you have found is an honest person looking for a financially stable life you just have to cultivate the relationship in the best way ... if she starts asking you for money or expensive gifts ... this is a wake-up call ... if she cares about you she doesn't ask you for money, she just asks you to take a serious path to make her feel happy and financially stable.