about to marry a jordanian man...

JO/EU wrote:

Hi James,

Prejudices is what I am talking about. We don't know any of these people, how can we for see things? How can u know who is using who?

Nothing prejudiced about it. I am talking from personal experience and if you had read my original posting carefully you'd note that I mentioned that I am also in a marriage that has a vast age difference. Clearly that qualifies me to speak and I have no prejudices at all. I'm living proof that such marriages CAN and DO work out. That said, they are really rare when they do.

I've also been in other relationships where it was clear that the only intention was for the other person to gain permanent residency in Canada. We certainly CAN predict problems when we've seen the signs of trouble many times in the past and see them clearly outlined in what Monica herself posted.

Nobody, but nobody should even think of marrying someone they've never met in person and only have been chatting with online for 2 months. That is simply inviting disaster and you don't need to be a psychologist or relationship counsellor to know that.

Cheers,
James         Expat-blog Experts Team

abutaha wrote:

Hi Courtney89 ,
When did you move to Jordan ? are  you staying at Jordan for long time ago ?
were you muslim or you just converted ?

"Or you just converted"? Wow

Bratty1919 wrote:

abutaha wrote:

Hi Courtney89 ,
When did you move to Jordan ? are  you staying at Jordan for long time ago ?
were you muslim or you just converted ?

"Or you just converted"? Wow

Given that Expat-blog is an international forum with members all over the globe, it should not be surprising that for many members ENGLISH is not their first language. Will they all have the "perfect" grammar of a native speaker? I think not!

I believe what the abutaha meant here was "just recently" converted. No need to get tense.  Interestingly enough Courtney seemed to understand exactly what abutaha was asking.

Cheers,
James     Expat-blog Experts Team

why are you wondering ? 

I think she is not wondering..... she corrects your English 

mohdq2002 wrote:

why are you wondering ? 

I think she is not wondering..... she corrects your English 

As an English teacher with a career that spans over 27 years, and one who has been granted a Bachelor of Arts - English and Bachelor of Education - English, by two world renowned Canadian universities I see nothing wrong with the member's English.

JUST = JUST RECENTLY/JUST NOW   OR  JUST = ONLY. It is worth noting that Courtney clearly understood the context of the question.

Further, since it is an international forum where English may not be the first language of many of our members, this is not the proper venue to correct errors. It is a forum, not a classroom. If there was any contextual misunderstanding of what was intended by the use of JUST, it clearly was on the part of Bratty1919. So can we all get back on topic here rather than turning it into an English grammar class.

Cheers,
James           Expat-blog Experts Team

mohdq2002 wrote:

why are you wondering ? 

I think she is not wondering..... she corrects your English 

Not at all - I was concerned about the idea that converting is not a big deal.

James wrote:

mohdq2002 wrote:

why are you wondering ? 

I think she is not wondering..... she corrects your English 

As an English teacher with a career that spans over 27 years, and one who has been granted a Bachelor of Arts - English and Bachelor of Education - English, by two world renowned Canadian universities I see nothing wrong with the member's English.

JUST = JUST RECENTLY/JUST NOW   OR  JUST = ONLY. It is worth noting that Courtney clearly understood the context of the question.

Further, since it is an international forum where English may not be the first language of many of our members, this is not the proper venue to correct errors. It is a forum, not a classroom. If there was any contextual misunderstanding of what was intended by the use of JUST, it clearly was on the part of Bratty1919. So can we all get back on topic here rather than turning it into an English grammar class.

Cheers,
James           Expat-blog Experts Team

Please read my PM - that is NOT the reason for my comment!

JO/EU wrote:

What's wrong about the sentence in English?
Why don't you correct it instead of just criticizing (bratty)

Please feel free to PM me if my other replies don't suffice

Bratty1919 wrote:

mohdq2002 wrote:

why are you wondering ? 

I think she is not wondering..... she corrects your English 

Not at all - I was concerned about the idea that converting is not a big deal.

I think he used the word "just" only as an expression like "simply" in no relation what so ever..

its quite OK to live in Jordan... if you love this man you would live with him in a desert! and its not a desert in Jordan .. Amman is a beautiful city with lots of open minded people.. you will enjoy living with your man in Jordan or you have the choice to go both to the states! but certainly Amman is great for married couples!

Maybe you have not understood, what she wants, she wants to be divorced from her Jordanian man... not to live with him even in Jordan or in Australia 

Againstfraud wrote:

No, pls save yourself before doing anything. The people there are best only as "friends" They are very friendly and provide hospitality, however, in my case the hospitality cost me financially. I was used for green card. The guy I married, while he was in Jordan he asked for money, and after he arrived to USA, he only lived one year with me, and after he took the green card, he disappeared, was hard to get a hold of him, and If I did he ignored me. Unknown person told me he had married someone else while he was away from me and ironically  marriage was done in a USA Masjid. Long story, but his family covered for him (in my case I saw Arab nationality than being Muslim first). During the time he was defrauding me with promises he will bring me to live with him until he is settled with a job, took money from me, but his promises never came true. After he was settled, he got rid of me slowly. I couldn't take it no more, so I divorced him. I should have done it earlier, I lost a lot of money, money he said he would pay, but he did not, later he changed the story said the money was help during marriage. After they come to the USA, they see other prettier ones, and start acting worst than the secular men out here. Make sure that the one you are thinking of marring is one who truthfully fears Allah. Not just a Muslim by name. Write a letter to onislam.com they will give you good advice.

Sadly, we see all too many stories just like yours here. This kind of marriage fraud for the purpose of obtaining a visa is all too common with US, EU, Canadian women and men from the Middle East, North Africa and Arab nations. The only thing that is even sadder is the fact that while all kinds of women are posting to our forums seeking advice, they seem to all be of the impression that IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN TO THEM so they refuse to take the advice given or listen to the (all too true) horror stories like yours. They all think they know better, which makes me wonder just why they're here asking for advice in the first place, when they clearly only want confirmation of what they already plan on doing?

Cheers,
James     Expat-blog Experts Team

James wrote:

Againstfraud wrote:

No, pls save yourself before doing anything. The people there are best only as "friends" They are very friendly and provide hospitality, however, in my case the hospitality cost me financially. I was used for green card. The guy I married, while he was in Jordan he asked for money, and after he arrived to USA, he only lived one year with me, and after he took the green card, he disappeared, was hard to get a hold of him, and If I did he ignored me. Unknown person told me he had married someone else while he was away from me and ironically  marriage was done in a USA Masjid. Long story, but his family covered for him (in my case I saw Arab nationality than being Muslim first). During the time he was defrauding me with promises he will bring me to live with him until he is settled with a job, took money from me, but his promises never came true. After he was settled, he got rid of me slowly. I couldn't take it no more, so I divorced him. I should have done it earlier, I lost a lot of money, money he said he would pay, but he did not, later he changed the story said the money was help during marriage. After they come to the USA, they see other prettier ones, and start acting worst than the secular men out here. Make sure that the one you are thinking of marring is one who truthfully fears Allah. Not just a Muslim by name. Write a letter to onislam.com they will give you good advice.

Sadly, we see all too many stories just like yours here. This kind of marriage fraud for the purpose of obtaining a visa is all too common with US, EU, Canadian women and men from the Middle East, North Africa and Arab nations. The only thing that is even sadder is the fact that while all kinds of women are posting to our forums seeking advice, they seem to all be of the impression that IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN TO THEM so they refuse to take the advice given or listen to the (all too true) horror stories like yours. They all think they know better, which makes me wonder just why they're here asking for advice in the first place, when they clearly only want confirmation of what they already plan on doing?

Cheers,
James     Expat-blog Experts Team

"They only want confirmation" - yes it makes me nuts, too!