what is true love with Vietnamese girl?

2POSTS

12 years ago

I incidently read a story about a British man maried with a dirty Vietnamese girl. I fell very ashamed because I am Vietnamese too. You should agree that you may meet the good ones or the bad ones in every country, but especially the ones origined from the poor countries such as Vietnam.

You are wondering why I say so and feel strange when I say so. The fact is that many girls now take advantage of their beauty and fake sweet heart to trap many foreigners who are looking for a true love with Asian girls. There are many reasons for Vietnamese woman to cheat them:
1. They want to leave Vietnam to emigrate to the other country
2. They are too poor and need money to help family
3. They are beautiful but lazy and want someone bring money back to her

Because of culture differences, the foreigner men cannot realize who the best for them. Once the woman want to trap you, you are hard to escape. I dont want to talk so much about the details of kinds of women but you should be aware of the kinds who always ask you for many things such as money, jewlery... or they always tell you about their relatives status like how poor they are and they are in need of some money.

Finally, if you are really looking for true love, you have to know basic about your girlfriend such as her family status, her relationship and her personality.

My viewpoint is never get married with a girl who is too poor or too little knowlege if I were you. They are too poor so they love money than you. They are too little knowledge so they cannot treat you as you want to get back from her.

Beauty is important, but honest is more important in the true love.

So the ones who I call the f***dirty girls, please keep your self - esteem and do not trap any guys here. What you are doing that make a bad impression about Vietnamese womwen in the world.

10 members reacted to this post

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aibiet150204 Serial expat

306POSTS

12 years ago

Curious on why you have to post this thread? Are you trying to marketing yourself as a good girl and a foreign guy should look for someone like you?

17 members reacted to this post

DanFromSF Serial expat

615POSTS

12 years ago

Why do you feel ashamed? I'm 100% certain nobody put a gun to the man's head to marry that girl. There are many stories about men who get involved with the wrong type of women and in all cases, it's the man's fault when it goes wrong. Because anybody with two brain cells to rub together knows when a women loves you or your wallet. I've found all it really takes is looking at the shoes and the motorbike. Hmmm... fancy Pradas, a nearly-new Vespa, and no obvious source of income? Next!

It's not hard to find hard-working, educated, beautiful Vietnamese women. In fact, the difficulty is choosing which one. When my hard-working, educated, beautiful Vietnamese girlfriend (20 years younger than me) asks me why I love her, I reply, "because I know you will never ask me for money." She thinks that's funny, but I'm only half-joking.

15 members reacted to this post

ameet4luan Active member

30POSTS

12 years ago

You should not generalise that "never love a poor girl" ... poor people too have self respect .. and they also have heart and they also love ... And as dan told , a man should have mind to judge whether the girl loves him or his money ... And such few cases happens everywhere .. and not only poor people but a good earning person marry or love someone for their advantage ..
But still thanks for making us aware about this situation ..

12 members reacted to this post

nnthuy154 New member

2POSTS

12 years ago

You're true that I should not accused of the poor people in genneral but love is blind, people do not realize a person until you see the good/bad sides from her. I dont hate the poor but I dont like women who are poor and lazy and wait money to support her.

4 members reacted to this post

mikeymyke Contributor

183POSTS

12 years ago

I agree, you can't really generalize about your own people that way. Whether it's a rich country or not, there will be bad women. In Vietnam, you have women who marry for permanent residence or money. In Canada, you have women who marry for money or to take half your assets after divorce.

I think the biggest thing is if a girl asks for money early on in the relationship, seems to not like her country very much and keeps asking about your own country, its a very bad sign, that's an easy way to spot a bad girl.

I disagree with the notion that poorer women are not good for foreigners because you could also make the argument that because a woman comes from a poorer environment, she knows the value of hard work, is used to growing up in a poor environment, and will want to look for a man who is hardworking as well. You could also say that women who come from the city are richer, so they tend to be more materialistic and want to go shopping lots, so they want a man who has lots of money. You see? That in itself is a bad generalization, and it goes both ways.

My wife never once asked me for money and she even initially wanted me to live in Vietnam because its where she grew up her whole life, and her whole family and friends are here. But I convinced her to come live with me in Canada because my job prospects are very poor in Vietnam, but in Canada, I make a great living, have a house, car, etc, and can provide for her much better here. I also pointed out to her that if she lives with me in Canada, she is able to travel to many countries visa-free (she is a big travel buff), but if we live in Vietnam, her travel ability is strictly limited, because many countries feel Vietnamese will overstay their visas.

She was really happy when I told her if her application for permanent residence fails (which is very unlikely), then I'm more than happy to go live in Vietnam with her.

You see? Vietnamese women are wonderful if you can find the right ones.

10 members reacted to this post

nnthuy154 New member

2POSTS

12 years ago

To DanfromSF

You're lucky, Dan because you met a good Vietnamese girl. As you said your girlfriend is beautiful, hard-working, and educated and your lover dont belong to any types of women I mentioned.

When I read the British man's threat about his experience in marrying with a Vietnamese woman. I found how dissapointed he was. He is one of other guys unlucky in finding in true love.

You asked me why I felt ashamed. Look back your half joke with your girlfriend in your comment. You also make sense in your joke. To be honest, I do not like your joke " i love you because you will never ask me for money". It got many things from your saying. Whatever!

4 members reacted to this post

DanFromSF Serial expat

615POSTS

12 years ago

nnthuy154 wrote:
To be honest, I do not like your joke " i love you because you will never ask me for money". It got many things from your saying. Whatever!

Thankfully I don't have to please you!

4 members reacted to this post

charmavietnam ViP

2841POSTS

12 years ago

Both good and bad people filled everywhere

The story of 'cheating' is not a new thing in this world. Vietnam is not exempted from that too.
If you have a better brain and use it well, of course you can read the mind of your partner. So if you are cheated, it's your inability. Don't blame others for that. 'True love'? Just forget it. It's beyond your dreams and imaginations. Just try to live in the present and be happy with that. People who only look for money, they have their reasons to do that. Why should you give yours if don't like? Remember, money cannot buy love

So don't say that you give money to your girl to get 'love'.
Back to Op:
It's a good campaign for your future business to get popularity. Many schools hire qualified native/non native teachers. Why should you insist for native teachers to play with your kids? Of course to make money

DanFromSF Serial expat

615POSTS

12 years ago

#10

charmavietnam wrote:
Remember, money cannot buy love

No, but money can buy a puppy. And a puppy will always love you.

8 members reacted to this post

Jquinoq Active member

98POSTS

12 years ago

#11

Naughty girls are the best, IMO

4 members reacted to this post

mikeymyke Contributor

183POSTS

12 years ago

#12

Jquinoq wrote:
Naughty girls are the best, IMO

And so are girls who want to marry you after a week right?

1 member reacted to this post

DanFromSF Serial expat

615POSTS

12 years ago

#13

mikeymyke wrote:
Jquinoq wrote:
Naughty girls are the best, IMO

And so are girls who want to marry you after a week right?

No, not the girls... their mothers.

4 members reacted to this post

Jquinoq Active member

98POSTS

12 years ago

#14

No, I. Never said that ......that's why I let her go

mikeymyke wrote:
Jquinoq wrote:
Naughty girls are the best, IMO

And so are girls who want to marry you after a week right?

DanFromSF Serial expat

615POSTS

12 years ago

#15

Jquinoq wrote:
No, I. Never said that ......that's why I let her go

Let us know how the "naughty" girls work out for you.

1 member reacted to this post

charmavietnam ViP

2841POSTS

12 years ago

#16

Yeah, for one night stand. No head ache but cannot bring in family

Jquinoq wrote:
Naughty girls are the best, IMO

alicele New member

8POSTS

12 years ago

#17

hey nnthuy154, i 120% agree with you

im a vietnamese girl too and i feel so so so ashamed coz those evil girls DO exist in this world. they can take advantage of every foreigners who think there is true love without money

.
Is this slogan of evil girls? "i need money for my family" plssssss stop it!!!!!!

1 member reacted to this post

ameet4luan Active member

30POSTS

12 years ago

#18

alicele wrote:
hey nnthuy154, i 120% agree with you
im a vietnamese girl too and i feel so so so ashamed coz those evil girls DO exist in this world. they can take advantage of every foreigners who think there is true love without money .
Is this slogan of evil girls? "i need money for my family" plssssss stop it!!!!!!

They are not putting gun on Man's head to love them ... And if they are asking for money , it's not a problem . She has right on her husband's money ..... The problem starts when she loves man's money only ...

1 member reacted to this post

Adhome01 Serial expat

426POSTS

12 years ago

#19

As my Granny always said, "kitty cat knows where that money's at".

1 member reacted to this post

truc_nguyen Contributor

163POSTS

12 years ago

#20

Hi, thanks for sharing your opinion about the situation. I just want to put some insight about your thread:

1. You mentioned the story about British man and Vietnamese girl which was in the previous thread? So I am wondering whether you have proof that the story is 100% true? or it is just something made up?
2. I partly agree with you that there are good and bad girls everywhere. However, I do not really think not all poor girls or little educated girls just take advantage of men. I have known some stories about foreigners getting married with street vendors, waitress, ethnic minority girl. And these stories are not about money but love
3. I think these kinds of girls might not really want to be bad at the very first beginning. Maybe their living environment, their family background. Some people in the difficult situations are strong enough to get through the temptation and to be better in the future but some can not because, I think, they havent seen the right path for their life.

In brief, on one hand, I do understand your feelings of how ashamed you feel as you are a also Vietnamese girl and I am, too. However, on the other hand, I feel my symphathy for the way they choose for how they are now. Not all people are lucky enough to be strong and wise and can make a right decision for how they are and will be in the future.

These are all my own opinions about the thread. You can discuss with me if you find some points of my view are not rational or do not understand my points (cos of the way I express my ideas).

By the way, have a nice weekend

5 members reacted to this post

Adhome01 Serial expat

426POSTS

12 years ago

#21

"True love" is when momma isn't so sick that she needs all your money and you're left with enough for a few beers and a pack of smokes. Well, that's true love to me anyways.

roseeden Member

16POSTS

12 years ago

#22

I proud of Viet Nam

5 members reacted to this post

jimbream Serial expat

693POSTS

12 years ago

#23

DanFromSF wrote:
charmavietnam wrote:
Remember, money cannot buy love

No, but money can buy a puppy. And a puppy will always love you.

Lots and lots of puppies.

ancientpathos Serial expat

729POSTS

12 years ago

#24

There will always be people that will marry because of money. In my opinion, Vietnamese parents are very practical. They want their daughter to marry up the financial stairs. Nothing wrong with this as long as both parties understand about the foundation of their marriage. In USA, I am just another fat, poor old man. Here I am rich, handsome, foreigner ideal marriage material. If you are fat, in your 60's and there is a 20 something Viet gal willing to marry you, love proably is not the number 1 reason she wants you. This is neither good nor bad. It just the way life is. My advice, true love is over rated, just enjoy your life here.

9 members reacted to this post

smellymoo Guest

0POSTS

12 years ago

#25

The same rules apply to people everywhere, we are all human, some are bad, some are good. You can always tell if someone really loves you, and will stay beside you. And there are lots of warning signs.

As for saying being poor is a sign, that is just wrong, I went out with a girl, and she was very very poor, and her family needed help, but she refused any from me.

The signs are when then do not try to think about you, and just think about themselves and how to get things from you. That is true in every country.

There are a lot of good Vietnamese people, and a lot of bad, like every other country.

4 members reacted to this post

minh goodrem Member

11POSTS

12 years ago

#26

i see some rick women still do same!!! and i see many rick peoples still walk on poor peoples for earn money.
many poor women, they work very hard for they family. are they sell them honor??
i wonder where is foreigner find they girlfriend, wife. what i see all most of them find in the puds for foreigner . and the puds at Vietnam is big different ( all most where the people buy and sell sex) some of that women they are very bad but some they have no choice,they have to do that job.
what you will do if you was born in poor family?? when your husband go away with another women, you have to look after 2 children and your mother buy yourself with salary 3 million a month. will enough for food?? it will ok with poor people, but if only 1 of them sick what you will do?? find some rick people help you???
do not pair for 99 % Vietnam poor women they do not have any change for have a good husband, a good life, and have no respect from rick people by maybe 1% Vietnam women. then they said together Vietnamese girl very bad. let learn how to find good wife from Chinese or Korean. They come to Vietnam married young and poor women. What they problem????

1 member reacted to this post

Yen Le 2407 Member

10POSTS

12 years ago

#27

DanFrom SF Honestly, if i were ur gf, i would get hurt when i heard that joke and would consider if i should keep n build up this relationship.

ancientpathos Serial expat

729POSTS

12 years ago

#28

I have observed true love with a Vietnamese girl. An iphone and a vietnamese girl, it must be love the amount of time she spends on it or the panic that happens when the battery is low.

2 members reacted to this post

Yen Le 2407 Member

10POSTS

12 years ago

#29

Ancientpathos i like ur "observation" (keep that vulgar comment for you)

2 members reacted to this post

ancientpathos Serial expat

729POSTS

12 years ago

#30

Yen Le 2407 wrote:
Ancientpathos i like ur "observation"

My observation was meant to be fun. I bought my housekeeper an iphone for Christmas and she is always doing something with it. Now for the foreigners that complain about their love life, they proably had no love life in their home countries and now can not make reasonable decisions. I have no illusions about myself. In the USA, I am just another old, fat, guy on retirement living month to month. Here I am rich, handsome, foreigner, that is good marriage material because Vietnamese woman are practical in wanting a good provider for a husband. Nothing wrong with this, just understand that 60 year old men are not desired because of their looks but for other qualities by women 30 to 40 years younger than them.

2 members reacted to this post

Yen Le 2407 Member

10POSTS

12 years ago

#31

It dun think it should be too serious and critical when talking about romantic relationships in Vietnam in particular and in the world in general. I havent experienced or observed the love life in another countries but i am sure that there is a big gap between developing countries and developed ones. However, it doesnt mean love of vietnamese girl is just what pp have been saying. I have observed that some foreigners here, they were nothing in their countries but here, they are treated really well and generously. Because the exchange rate of US Dollars n VND, they obviously become kings or queens at work, in the lifestyle and even in love here. And when they have that "power" and "wealth" they give their own rights to look down at people who are less lucky than them. And for some male foreigners, they take it for granted vietnamese girls are easy to get and they can get what they want and as many as they can because of their money.
Yeah, some vietnamese girls may be surprised or admired by the strange and different lifestyle and the culture in the beginning, which is understandable. And when they are managing to adopt to that lifestyle, they dunno that they are just another girl in the collection. And after they get accustomed to the new life, they will find out that their bfs dunno how to manage his money which is just used as a tool for attract girls by himself. They start asking for what they want and what is suitable for their current lifestyle now. Its a result of a long process. Unluckily, as one expat man told me from his observation, 80% of expat - vietnamese relationships ended with break-up, so what should the girls do? They used to be a gf of a "king", they have experienced luxury life now, and they got to know what the "king" want and how he works. So in the end they just become what they are trained, just like some foreign men, who have become players when they live in Vietnam, especially those who have been here for a long time. Therefore, i think its just a negative result of what is call culture exchange, so foreign men, please dun complain about vietnamese girls unless you are a real man.

sghsaigon Serial expat

223POSTS

12 years ago

#32

(moderated: no generalised statement for an another country here please ) a girl will only like you if your rich and drive a nice car. At least in Vietnam if you don't have a car you still have half a chance ....

2 members reacted to this post

born2share Active member

37POSTS

12 years ago

#33

Wait... I don't agree with this.

nnthuy154 wrote:
My viewpoint is never get married with a girl who is too poor or too little knowlege if I were you. They are too poor so they love money than you. They are too little knowledge so they cannot treat you as you want to get back from her.

Beauty is important, but honest is more important in the true love.

There might be some give and take in every relationship in positive or negative way. People are aware of it but maybe due to some reasons, they still want to take those bad.

mikeymyke Contributor

183POSTS

12 years ago

#34

Poor girls are better IMO, because they grew up in such a poor environment, they understand the value of money and a hard day's work, so they're less likely to be with you for money. A more well off girl is so used to getting what she wants, she will expect that from you every time.

2 members reacted to this post

Flip465 Serial expat

265POSTS

12 years ago

#35

It would appear the moderators took his advice -

To quote - " Moderators, if you see this as "offensive generalizations" then delete my post (and account) but don't insult my intelligence by responding to candid, honest reporting of factual reality with smarmy little scolds. I don't want to read them. "

For those who didn't realize it, this ' DoingNothing ' was the latest of a vast number of fake membership ID's that the serial pest Chris Fox tried to use.
Once again he has been 'outed' and banned.

We can expect him back again soon I'd guess, with yet another fake ID, judging from his past.

Some people just can't take a hint, Chis Fox is one of the worse of the serial offenders.

BYE - BYE Chris, we'll miss you, NOT !

1 member reacted to this post

OBB Active member

93POSTS

12 years ago

#36

Hihi....i should have guessed when he was ranting about Viet coffee and praising starbucks.

1 member reacted to this post

Ngan Khanh Contributor

159POSTS

12 years ago

#37

Flip465 wrote:
For those who didn't realize it, this ' DoingNothing ' was the latest of a vast number of fake membership ID's that the serial pest Chris Fox tried to use.
Once again he has been 'outed' and banned.

We can expect him back again soon I'd guess, with yet another fake ID, judging from his past.

Some people just can't take a hint, Chis Fox is one of the worse of the serial offenders.

BYE - BYE Chris, we'll miss you, NOT !

oh, I miss him! Such a lovely friendly guy!

I'm a woman so take my words carefully! hahahaha

Back to the topic, I was once a little poor girl. Guess my previous rich boyfriends didn't have any problem with that! If you're born poor it's not your fault; but if you die poor, it's your fault.

I'm Vietnamese girl and I don't feel ashamed because of those bad girls at all. The men have to blame themselves for not being smart enough to protect themselves from dangerous things in life . I can't see why a man cannot protect or take care of himself deserves a good girl.

4 members reacted to this post

pathixon48 Active member

56POSTS

12 years ago

#38

Everything you said was so true and can be helpful to any man who listens to you before he gets trapped by a VN woman who is often very attractive but but has her own ulterior motives for the relationship.. I have found out the hard way everything you said is so true.. But I am very surprised to see a VN woman so openly and honestly trying to warn unsuspecting men of the pitfalls...

lirelou Serial expat

393POSTS

12 years ago

#39

Yen Le, I liked your post. The great irony is that had Vietnam developed as Taiwan and South Korea did, there would be far fewer expats in Vietnam, and those who did end up here would find the playing field between foreign men and Vietnamese women more level.

That said, there would still have to be a corresponding shift in Vietnamese attitudes towards women across the social and cultural spectrum to view Vietnamese women as co-equal to men. In short, the abandonment of the Confucian idea that women are inherently inferior and in need of male guidance.

2 members reacted to this post

Adhome01 Serial expat

426POSTS

12 years ago

#40

Ngan Khanh wrote:
[Back to the topic, I was once a little poor girl. Guess my previous rich boyfriends didn't have any problem with that! If you're born poor it's not your fault; but if you die poor, it's your fault. .

This is nice and inspiring but simply not true. There are 10's of millions of people in this world (including Viet Nam) that will always be poor, no matter how hard they try. These people don't have access to schools, job opportunities or "rich boyfriends". It you are fortunate enough you get yourself out of poverty, then, good for you. But don't assume everyone in the world only need try and they can do the same, it's not the case. I've seen many that would just be happy with a place to sleep, clean water and food to eat. They try very hard, every day, just to get those things and not always succeeding.

2 members reacted to this post

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