Your worst mistakes speaking a foreign language

I remember quite a lot of mistakes I made when I was in Spain. Everybody laughted a lot! (I felt very stupid)

I heard about robbers who brake into a friend's house in the country side, and and took everything from the house (even the chicken that where outside the house)... I said to my colleague "robaron todo hasta la pollas" (ok "un pollo" is a chicken but you'll have to guess what "una polla" is).

Another time I said after playing football " ese chico casi me roto una gamba" ... I wanted to say "the other guy almost broke my leg"

Several times, when people asked me where I had lived before moving to Belgium (in Dutch),  I replied, "Vroeger woonde ik in de Verenigde Konijnen".  What I was trying to say was that before being in Belgium I had lived in the United Kingdom (Verenigde Koninkrijk).  Later I figured out that I'd actually been saying, "Before, I lived in the United Rabbits".

Also, on one occasion when I was feeling tired, (which is "moe" in Dutch); I instead announced to the room at large, "Ik ben heel mooi" which means, "I'm very beautiful".

I was writing down a recipe in Spanish for a friend's mother. I used the Catalan word for leek (porro) in place of the Spanish one (puerro). Fortunately I saw my mistake when I read it again otherwise it would have meant "I advise you to try a variant of the recipe with... joints!!!"

I think there's a huge problem concerning pronounciation too.
Till today, I just can't make the difference between beach and b*, flour and floor...

Blame me :-P

How about sheet and sh**,

focus and f**k us...

Someone laughs at me most every day, I am now inured to embarassment forever...I cannot even remember what stunners I have used.

You're right. Pronounciation mistakes are more frequent and sometimes worse!

In Italian there are many pairs of word differing only by a simple/double consonnant, which you have to pronunce the right way.
For instance anni (years) / ani (anuses). Great mistake when you say your age

This isn't a bad mistake,but a funny one. I'm currently learning to drive in Italy, and so the word guidare (to drive) is on my mind. I was with my sleeping child in a cafe and wanted to go to the loo. So I asked the barman to watch the baby. He looked at me funny, and so did the several builders clustered around the bar and I realised I'd said guidare instead of guardare (to watch). I'd ask him to drive her away! L

I'm sat at break time (recess) with a group of Mexican children.They are all talking English because I am there. I try to break the ice by answering a question with:
"No se nada" - I don't know anything
Unfortunately they all hear it as:
"No se nagle" - I don't know butt
In under five seconds the whole school knew that Mr. Kay didn't know butt!
It amazes me how fast word can spread around a playground.

My worst mistakes that i would never forget are when i got wrong in pronunciation of "internet, politics. I'm talking to my friend and then suddenly I mispronounce it, I was so embarrass. But there is saying says "Correction is needed but not to be insulted" so I’m still lucky enough to correct it will.

But now  I really study how to pronounce will.

Well... you study how to pronounce well

After being a few year in Germany and having acquired a relative amount of friends (Classic Mini Cooper/Martial Arts Club)we were all in a restaurant (around 15)eating and talking and having a great time, it was winter time and it was kind of stuffy so I decided to go outside, I mistakenly said Ich Bin heiss which means, "I am gay" instead of saying Mier ist heiss which means translated like I'm burning its hot in here! Everybody stopped eating looked at me and voila the joke of the month. It did not stop there, later on I asked one of my friends what did "latte" (Not the coffee one) means and it seams that everybody was unconsciously listening and again they all started to laugh. I was frozen for a moment until someone explained to me that it meant beam. OK. right? wrong it meant in dialect "erect" if you catch what I mean. It is fun to learn diff languages but sometimes... 

I still love to learn and sometimes the joke is on me!!! LOL

One that made me blush with a group of friends was saying that a loaf of bread had "preservativos" in it, which doesn't mean preservatives, it means condoms.

Use of "to broom" instead of "to sweep".

"I like to broom it, broom it
I like to broom it, broom it
I like to... BROOM it"

I once told an Italian he had "pig headed attitude". He understood he had "the head of a pig".
Did not help the discussion

My best one, trying to "convert" my Spanish into Italian was telling an Italian man that "he was a small/ little Italian", instead of saying that "I spoke small/ little Italian". Bad luck that he only reached to my nose and I am a small woman ;-) ;-) ;-) SY

When I was studying English language in Malaysia, I went to chinese restuarant order fry noodle and told them, "Throw away please" instead of Take away.  :-)

Hi
I feel guilty when interact with others.bcuz my pronunciation is too bad.now i'm in USA.i dont know us ascent.how can i improve myself....

I told my Spanish neighbours I'd had 'an adventure' and couldn't understand why they laughed. It seems 'aventura' also means 'affair' here.


Chickens, Mules and Two Old Fools

well when i was in france i got together for a meal with a french fren of mine and in the middle of the meal i wanted to say am satisfied, which wud be "je suis rassasie". guess what i ended up saying, "je suis racist, et toi, tu est racist?
you can imagine her reaction. shes learning english so she went like, "WHAT"!!!!
ever since then that became our form of greeting:lol:

Prime Minister Mori was given some Basic English conversation training before his visit to Washington and meeting with President Barack Obama ...

The instructor told Prime Minister Mori, 'when you shake hand with President Obama, please say 'how are you?"
Mr. Obama should say, 'I am fine, and you?'



Now, you should say 'me too. Afterwards we, the translators, will do the work for you.'

It looks quite simple, but the truth is ...

When Mori met Obama, he mistakenly said 'who r u?' (instead of 'How are you?')

Mr. Obama was a bit shocked but still managed to react with humor:
'Well, I'm Michelle's husband, ha-ha ...'

Mori replied 'me too, ha-ha .. .'

Then there was a long silence in the meeting room

We were living in Colombia at the time. At a very fine restaurant I thought I had ordered a tall glass of chilled orange juice (jugo de naranja), but instead had ordered a glass of nose juice (jugo de nariz).

Here are a few that are not my own;

Korean man in America wants to park his car at an airport parking garage. He can't find a space.

The lot attendant (a woman) approaches him, seeing that he's in need of assistance. "I need to park my car." She looks at him strangely and doesn't reply.

Again he says "I want parking space." Her eyebrows furrow and she says irritatedly "What?" "I said, I want park my car. I need parking place."

"Go to hell!" she tells him.

It took him a very long time to figure out her reaction. At last he remembered that Koreans often mix up P sound and F sound.

Here's another, an American man in Taiwan can speak and read some Chinese. He goes to the local restaurant desiring a bowl of beef noodle soup.

Up on the menu board he spies a list of items. He reads out what he wants (reading from right to left). He says to the chef "Wo yao niu ro da bien."

The chef and everyone else laughs out loud. The American is confused. The chef reminds him to read from top to bottom not from left to right. Otherwise he would serve him up a bowl of cow shit.

Beware of names (in any languages)! Names that sound bad in a local language. Once I was with an Arab friend lining up at the Immigration Office in Kathmandu to help renewing his visas. For him it was his first time. We were waiting outside the door and the signboard said: "Kusumak-Ar Dhakal, Immigration Officer (Nepalese for Spring-Season...funny name for a man anyway)Then my friend started giggling and could not stop even when we were called in. The officer was irritated from work overload and grumbled: "Why are you laughing? I have no time for jokes!" The friend said: "Sir...better change your signboard outside your office. Today more Arab friends of mine arrive here!" The officer:"What's wrong wit my signboard?" "Your name Sir...in Arabic it means...giggle...giggle...oh no I can not say! Better give me my visa first!" So the Officer stamped his passport, signed it and waived us away. Then he jumped up and said:"Wait a minute...what does my name mean in Arabic?"
"I can not say...giggle..giggle...not in front of all these people here..follow me into the restroom!" So they went and came out quick and Mr. Dhakal took his signboard away while having a purple face full of embarrassment. I did not need to ask Ali..I knew the word...but I just had not paid attention before to it...an other country and other language...makes you neutral. Kusumak....hm...giggle...it is the worse one can say in Sudan or Egypt...means motherf..... of course!

This is the best thread ever on Expat.com Hahahaha (^.^)

I've cocked up loads of times but my worst was to a young maid we had working for us at the time.
I was just starting playing with Indonesian so I was pretty rubbish but this was terrible.
I wanted to say, "See you later" but had no clue there was a phrase for that so I tried it literally.
See - Lihat
You - Kamu
Later - Well "Mandi" sounds quite a lot like "Nanti", Later, but unfortunately means bath or washing.

She looked at me in a strange way, I wondered what the devil was wrong, then she realised what I'd tried to say and broke out in fits of laughter.

I am having awful trouble with Bulgarian, I am trying to learn before my move next month, its not just the languages but of course the alphabet is different too !!!... my bulgarian fiance laughs at me a lot...i try my best but...my pronounciation to her i guess is very funny...and i keep getting things in the wrong context too.....but I think we should take heart from the fact that sometimes the pronounciation from their part isnt good too....i have seen all kinds of menu's.... the worst one so far offered me as a starter..."strangled language"... my fiance explained it was ox tongue ... also I have seen grilled old man from bansko....not sure what that was... I think language is fun and if you do try to have some fun with it and have some fun with the locals...you will learn more...wish you all luck

I was reading this thread yesterday morning and couldn't think of anything to add until that same night my 2,5 year old son wished my husband goodnight in Flemish and then added "salaud!" ("bastard" in French). He meant to say "salut" (goodbye). I hope he doesn't repeat that word in public or the French will consider me the worst mom in the world.

  ahahhaa!! 
...relate much,
it's just about the pronouncation and sometimes the spelling!! Different country,have different accent,the way you say it,they got different meanings on it!

I have serious trouble pronouncing french words. I find Spanish words interesting to pronounce, but I flop everytime.

POSTERS:

1) In a 2-RIYAL-STORE:

   wife: hon, please be careful, stay beside me.
   husband: why?
   wife: (pointing at the signage in arabic and with english           
         translation)

         "EVERYBODY 2 RIYALS"


2) hiring poster WITH translation in english:

   In urgency need of masteral in sewing, with excellence and beautiful experience. call ************.
   With seductive salary.


CONVERSATIONS:

Fortunately i did not have any major disaster with arabic language. Here are from those i know:

3)all the nurses were sitting in the waiting area when a physician passed by. One nurse greeted loudly.

     nurse: Hi doctora! Good morning.
     Doctor: good morning.
     nurse:  inte abita doctora!
     Doctor: whaaaaaaaaat?????
     nurse: i said you are soooo abita doctora..very much.
   
the physician went flushed and furious and went to the receptionist. The receptionist came and spoke to the nurse.

    nurse said: no, i just told her she is beautiful
    receptionist: yes, but abita means CRAZY!



4)admitted arab patient: " ya sister, ana khaif, ashan baden ana                     
                         moth"
                        ( nurse , im afraid maybe(later)     
                           i will die)


the new nurse did not understand the patient's statement. but she just replied to assure the patient.

new nurse:  aywa, mafi mushkila. Inshallah.
          ( yes , no problem, you will be)

when i said to my teacher : oh really i get excited!!! instead of saying i am excited ( he asked me if i wanted to join a group of students travelling to canada ) my teacher's face became red and embarrased he told me hummmmm well ok ok then he exlained to me what i said is not so fine!

iam posting a language mistake which is from someone..in brussels

A lady ask a man in french that "vos yeux sont beaux" means your eyes are beautiful

He replied "vos oeufs sont belles" means your eggs are beautiful also.

In french yeux= eyes and oeufs= egges can be pronounce almost same.

Please stop laughing

I'm still making mistakes when I speak, I have a story but I wasn't the one who made the mistake.
My husband is American and when he went to Egypt to visit my family my sister asked him if he knows any Arabic. He said no. so my sister said "I want to touch you." instead of "I want to teach you."
He and I laughed, she knew she said it wrong and she was very embarrassed.

Once I was writing an email to a male friend about cooking and I wrote Cock instead of cook. I didn't notice it until after I sent it. I'm happy I didn't see his face when he read it.

This thread just made my day! Good one!

Loooooooool @DoveOmri
"Q" sounds a bit  like "K" in Arabic, but "Q" its pronounced very far back in the throat.
When you say the letter K, you touch the roof of your mouth with more or less the middle of your tongue. When you say a Q=qaaf, you touch the very back of your tongue to the soft palate in the back of your mouth.
Now, you can try and call you husband "QALBI"(my heart)

At least they laugh with us because we try to speak their lingo!