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What makes

Primadonna

a man a gentleman and a woman a lady?

See also
Fred

Being English helps but that is no guarantee.
One has to behave in the correct manner.

"Ladies first" is a good start.

HaileyinHongKong

Class, dignity and a little self-respect.  Things sadly lacking these days.

Here is a good example of a gentleman and a lady
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h1dmKyj9kN0

Fred

I was considering a better answer than my above when I realised, if you don't know what a lady and a gentleman are, you aren't.

Fred

A gentleman knows exactly what everything is and knows the words without having to google.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gAEs7UzV98Q

Fred

A gentleman knows the words of the loyal toast and always stands when the national anthem is played at the close of Radio 4's transmissions each evening.

Fred

Both a lady and a gentleman know how to enjoy afternoon tea at the Ritz.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2r-1h9hxnrs

A polite pair of ladies know how to address a delicate subject in the correct way.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ym7IEBntjuY

Ladies and gentlemen know how to behave at the table

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZxX7YW_97QU

HaileyinHongKong

You have to be English to be a gentleman?