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Sonic_Jelly

Hi Guys and Gals

I have been living in Vietnam for a few years and have met a lady.  We are in a relationship and I would like to get engaged.  I know for getting married that you need loads of paperwork but what do I need just to get engaged?  What are the formalities such as engagement party, etc.....?

I want to get engaged as I have to return to the UK soon as need to sort out family business regarding a will.  I would be returning after approx 6 months.  I also want the engagement to act as a sort of trial period to see how her parents and family are.  Would rather make a mistake with an engagement rather than find out after/if we get married.

Please note - I am not looking for advice on getting married yet so please don't answer with the details about what I need for that.  I will ask that later if needed.

Thanks in advance

Sonic

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bertieboy123

Hi Sonic.

You just get engaged lol ! I got engaged January 2017 to my now wife. I am British she is Vietnamese and we just went out and bought a ring :-) We didn't hold an engagement party. We just started planning our wedding which we held in January of this year !

Good luck & best wishes.

Mike

Darwin123

For me it was like this:
1. Did you meet her family yet? If yes, you should ask them first.
2. Ask your girl
3. Invite whole family in a restaurant for dinner.

Sonic_Jelly

Hi

Thanks bertieboy123 and Darwin123.

Not met the family yet as they live in Hanoi whilst she works on Phu Quoc.

I forgot to mention that she IS divorced but as long as it is all signed off then there is no problem.

Will look into a ring and will report back.

I want the engagement to be an insight to how her family may behave should we finally tie the knot.

Thanks again

Sonic

THIGV

If you are previously married, you should take advantage of your trip to the UK to sort out your paperwork. In particular you can certify your divorce papers at the VN Embassy in London.  If you have been single your whole life, you will need a certificate of single status.  It's all covered on separate threads and should be on he Viet Embassy London website.  Due to changes in UK Consulate policy, you can no longer certify these documents in HCMC and will need to do this legwork in the UK.

Sonic_Jelly

Hi THIGV

I did say that SHE is divorced and nothing regarding myself.  I am infact single and never married.

Thanks

Sonic

Priscilla

Hi Sonic_Jelly,

Please note that some posts have been removed from this thread.

Thanks,

Priscilla
Expat.com team  :cheers:

Thaiger

just being cruel to be kind  -nothing wrong with that.

THIGV

Sonic_Jelly wrote:

I did say that SHE is divorced and nothing regarding myself.  I am infact single and never married.


I know you said you don't wan't to be told what you need to be married but there really are no legal requirements for engagement.  Still, you should get the "Affidavit of Marital Status" done while you are in Britain.  Here is a link:  http://vietnamembassy.org.uk/index.php? … s#MARRIAGE  Getting it done after you return to Vietnam could be a pain, particularly if you are on Phu Quoc.

I may be wrong but I am pretty certain that you can get the mental health certificate in Vietnam.   Your fiance will need her divorce certificate as well.  Another thing to anticipate is that unless your fiance has legally transferred her personal residence to Phu Quoc, you may need to be married in Hanoi if she is still in her parents "red book."  You may want to be married there anyway in deference to the parents, but you should be aware that it may be a legal requirement as well.

gobot

Just my 2.000 đồng but Vietnam is a very traditional country especially around topics like marriage. If there is any way you can jet up to Hanoi for a weekend to meet her family before you go back to Britain, that would help to solidify an engagement better than a ring. This would avert a possible situation where your girlfriend is getting counseling from the family, who are likely already unhappy she has removed herself all the way down to Phu Quoc, and now talking about marrying a foreigner, and you not being here to defend her (your duty) or yourself!

By the way the ritual of engagement rings is not common here, but a nice western touch.

Hapiness1988

Sonic_Jelly wrote:

Hi Guys and Gals

I have been living in Vietnam for a few years and have met a lady.  We are in a relationship and I would like to get engaged.  I know for getting married that you need loads of paperwork but what do I need just to get engaged?  What are the formalities such as engagement party, etc.....?

I want to get engaged as I have to return to the UK soon as need to sort out family business regarding a will.  I would be returning after approx 6 months.  I also want the engagement to act as a sort of trial period to see how her parents and family are.  Would rather make a mistake with an engagement rather than find out after/if we get married.

Please note - I am not looking for advice on getting married yet so please don't answer with the details about what I need for that.  I will ask that later if needed.

Thanks in advance

Sonic


Hi Sonic,

The common traditional engagement procedures in Vietnam are:
1. Her parent will ask for a fotune-teller to choose amd decide the day and time which suit your age and her age first.
2. On the chosen day, you will wear traditional custom - Ao Dai to go with your parent to visit her house with traditional trays (specific fruits, tea, betel and areca...), some amount of money is pit on the envelop, she can help you arrange this. After some speeches of your parent and her parent to witness your love in front of ancestors, the small party (about 5-7 tables) will be held right at her house. In this party, there are her invited relatives, friends.
3. The purpose of this engagement to declare that you both have intention to get married in the near future to people and mark that she will have a husband in the future (no other man can flirt her :D)


Nowadays, some couples can just wear rings then move to wedding and skip the engagement - it depends on how traditional her family is.

Hope it helps.

Regards,
Ni

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