Moroccan romance scam or love story?

okay.good luck

Hello hosnkhatimaa,

If you have anything private to say, you can message javava88 privately through the website. There is no need to have her contact number.

I thank you for your understanding.

Yoginee

Expat.com team

yes I understand now the site.because i am new here.i will send a message private.

thank you yoginee

I didn't know that I could send it privately, because I have golden advice for her and I don't want anyone to read it, especially those close to her.

@hosnkhatimaa what is this golden advice,

It might help us all?

@javava88

You are smitten by the accent and the pretty face. He does not love you. It's ok to spend your money on a date, but put the brakes on about finding him a job in Germany. You do not know him from Adam's house cat. The fact that you are asking strangers on a forum is enough to tell you that the situation is a "No go". Give him some "Nah nah" if you want to and carry yourself home.

Exactly

@javava88 Hello friend. Did you visit Morocco and how did it go? I hope you found the answers you were searching for. I hope you find true love, someone that makes you smile and laugh uncontrollably. 

@hosnkhatimaa

I have been reading this thread for a similar but different situation.  If you have "Golden Advice" of how foreign women could best understand Moroccan men, please share!  That is why we are here and likely why many others are reading this too. 

Moroccans are lovely people ,   I like Morocco a lot

I actually would like to live there , it's a choice between morocco , Portugal , Spain .    And through my visits.   , you will encounter others that see you as a banking service ,   I've got true friends in morocco honest and kind . But previously what I thought were friends ,    Then  it's the asking ,   For bike. Then Moto bike then hospital fees , phones.  Then feed the horses ,   The list is never ending .    Please don't be fooled ..   stay safe , and wise .. but morocco people nomads are generous with their hospitality.  🙏🏼. Lovely people ,

@geegee10 what a shame

I will say people who praise and want to live in Morocco and love Morocco and trust Moroccans etc are part of a scam they haven't understood yet.

I'm not moroccan and lived here for almost 10 years.

I have spent the last 7 years trying to leave!

My ex husband who is moroccan/ British is in the UK living his life and I'm stranded here because we have kids and I'm not even moroccan!

The law is on his side, the culture is on his side and he isn't even here.

It took me over a year to work out paperwork for the passport applications etc .

Moroccans in general think I'm a massive ATM machine and sadly, I'm Muslim I wear Islamic attire according to the quran. There is no doubt about my commitment to my religion, yet they are willing and wanting to take advantage of me for a passport or money!!!!

They treat non Muslims worse since they consider a non Muslim woman or western woman " easy" so they consider it free game to take advantage of her emotionally, financially etc.

There is those who say not all Moroccans blah blah..

Sure, but I would say this isn't the exception, I would say its the rule!

My children are born here and sadly I can't wait to get them away from this society

So, what's your nationality- original or to date?

Your husband, a Moroccan/British has deserted you. 

On what basis are you a cash machine, an ATM?

In all these years did you ever reach out to the British Embassy to help with this problem?

Why would a passport/legal papers take so long?

What difference would/does it make whether you wear a mini skirt or a full Islamic dress, the issues could not be solved?   

Most people, of all descriptions, love freebies, so Moroccans are no exception.

Despite trying to leave for the last 7 years, ‘married' for 10 years, what responsibilities are on your husband's shoulders regarding your/his children?   

Strange situation!

@aishahm I think you are sorry for yourself. and you blame someone else for your state of being. Not everyone is the same. And labeling western women for being easy, this end that wont take you anywhere.

You said you want to leave Morocco but with this mindset thinking of women in Europe you will struggle in Europe.

I can imagine how Moroccan members of this group feel , reading some of these comments.

@Guest9742 Dear friend, I do have met the Moroccan guy totally two times after our first meeting in Morocco. From November 2022 to Feburary 2023 we kept in touch for 4 months. He continuously said he loved me and wanted to be with me forever. But I made it clear that I can not marry him in one year. But we had also different opinions in many aspects. He wanted to break up with me many times. And finally on the vanlentin‘s day he broke up with me again. I was not satisfied with him because he did not even sent me a virtual red rose on this special day. After asking for a rose he sent me a pink rose. After I questioned that, he said if I thought a red rose has more value, he would like to break up with me right now. And that is all. After that I have never heard anything from him.

I am not so sure if he really loved me. But I think, if it is real love, he will not leave me so easily.

He did not ask me for money. But he do told me many times that he has no money and his mother has heart disease and his father has cancer. I just paid all bills when we were together.

Thank you all guys for sharing with me about your opinions🌹I wish everybody can find true love ❤️

@Guest9742 It is difficult to understand each other if you have different ages, cultures, religions and educations. The Moroccan guy misunderstood me many times. And I did not understand his behavior sometimes as well.

@RR@ its a shit situation not a strange one.

I mentioned my veil because I'm Muslim and clearly practicing yet he threatened to say I'm not so he can try remove my children since I reverted to Islam when I was 12 but I kept my English name and never changed it to an Arab name.

Many people don't understand how quickly a man can totally screw your whole life in Morocco with just 1 word even without proof.

Women are definitely lower class citizens by culture and culture overules the law many times.

He never made any of my residency paperwork so I'm here illegal which has left me being sent back and forth trying to get paperwork to make British passports for my children since he isn't here and he never registered the children born in Morocco.

I spent 5 years trying to get divorced from him and the law even though by text says certain things it is bias to men and their rights.

I can not take my children to the uk or Australia ( I'm australian) on moroccan passports, they won't be granted a visa since they have a British father and the appropriate application

For a passport must be made.

All of that aside I have struggled without my family or friends, I receive child support but  my ex doesn't pay for medicine, schooling, any education costs for the kids or my daughters heart condition treatments etc.

British and Australian embassy isn't there to do anything for anyone other than sign papers and help with passport application ( australian embassy) the British one doesn't even help with that.

People think because I'm born abroad my life is safe and my country of birth will save me, no infact I'm worse off than a ny 3rd world country because morocco won't help me and my country won't help me as that is not what embassy's are for.

Moroccans fault to understand that us " white" people aren't rich and just have an endless flow of money and help from abroad. 

@Popolushka lol I'm australian ...

You think I'm sorry for myself. I'm sorry for you since you clearly have no idea

Such an interesting string. 

@javava88  they can play the long game.  There is a lot at stake.  A residential status in the west.  Any Moroccan man with a job unmarried at 30 to be viewed with suspicion.    The culture is to marry have kids.   Moroccan men expect to be obeyed and desired.  So they are not happy if their significant other is in another city let alone country.      Many will target divorced older richer overweight lonely widowed etc  and the smart ones never ask for money. They bewitch you into paying by showing their circumstances as poorer than you.    If you are vulnerable. You fit the target. They love bomb claim to be loyal lonely and looking for life long companions- they come from huge families there isn't a lack of contacts to find beautiful young Moroccan women queuing up to marry beautiful young Moroccan men.   Moroccan women choose wisely.   So I would choose wisely too if I were you.

@javava88 they can play the long game. There is a lot at stake. A residential status in the west. Any Moroccan man with a job unmarried at 30 to be viewed with suspicion.  The culture is to marry have kids.  Moroccan men expect to be obeyed and desired. So they are not happy if their significant other is in another city let alone country.   Many will target divorced older richer overweight lonely widowed etc and the smart ones never ask for money. They bewitch you into paying by showing their circumstances as poorer than you.  If you are vulnerable. You fit the target. They love bomb claim to be loyal lonely and looking for life long companions- they come from huge families there isn't a lack of contacts to find beautiful young Moroccan women queuing up to marry beautiful young Moroccan men.  Moroccan women choose wisely.  So I would choose wisely too if I were you.
-@Zig8UP

Thank you so much for your wise words🌹Every words of you should be remembered! It seems you know Moroccan men very well. Have you been scammed before? What have you lost financially or emotionally?

I can not agree with you more. But I get this only after I was hurt emotionally.

I have broken up several times with this Moroccan guy. The final brokeup came out because I accidentally found out that he follows, likes and flirts with more than 9000 beautiful, sexy and young Moroccan women during our relationship. I am a totally different type from those women. At that moment I questioned myself whether he really loved me as he everyday told me. If he likes those women he could not really loves me!!! I was so heart broken when I saw his followings and I asked him to unfollow this women. But he complained that I did not trust him. He assured me it was trivial thing. I shouldn't worry.  He only loved me. He continues his behavior. Therefore I broke up with him. But I missed him so much and I told him I want him back. Then he said only if I marry him he will stop talking with other women. I asked him how could I marry him if he continued likes and flirts with those woman. And then I cut him off finally.

This moroccan guy has only told me he had only one relationship before. He does not watch po** videos and he even does not mast***. And he accidentally let me know he was virgin which I now doubt. He love bombed me through sending me messages like „I love you, I miss you so much, I want to be with you forever.“ everyday. I have the impression that he is traditional, pure and loyal. But after the brokeup he never sent me any words.

what I can tell now is he wants a visa to Europe through marriage. He has never asked for money directly but he do told me how poor he is, he will be fired soon, his father has cancer and his mother has heart disease. But I have learned from other woman that I should not send money. Therefore I have not lost money on him. I habe only paid bills when we were together.

He has a job, is in his thirties and sigle. According to Islamic culture he should be married with a younger Moroccan woman. His father has two wives and ten children. He has enough chances to know younger Moroccan women. I am much older  than him, financially stable, divorced, lonely and from Europe.  It is already suspicious that he likes a woman much older than him, and declares his love only after one meeting and wants marry me after only one month. But I ignored all red flags and was blind because of love.

I hope my story can help other women open their eyes and make the right decision.

I am still missing him and wants to write to me even though I know he scammed me😞Yes I know I am stupid. I still can not eat and sleep well. There is a long way for me to heal myself. But I still believe in love and I am sure love heals all wounds. I hope all love scam victims can stay strong and share their stories to help other women!

@Zig8UP I am just thinking how can I warn those women he likes and flirts on TikTok about his true face? He has my personal information. I am afraid of his revenge. Do you have any ideas?

@javava88  they are masters of deception and lies flow easily.    I was burnt so badly. Married for three years before I realised the double life.  The life before me and the life that went on beside me.    I don't think I'll ever fully recover from that deceit.  The entire family know how to play the game. You have handed their son a lifeline.  Do they love? In their own way. I believed the love.  However it's for a gain and if you remove the access path the love dies instantly.         I think if these men that trick used that very clever brain to develop a business rather than look for a marriage with someone ultimately frowned upon and unsuitable within their culture they would be millionaires.   They are clever beyond our realisation.   However I was warned over and over like I warn here but I believed every word he said. Nothing could have stopped me marrying him.   So …… now it's for me to forgive myself and move forward.   Good luck xx

@Zig8UP nothing is guaranteed even if you married a guy that lived near you.

Vice versa, some people's intentions are not good, and then there is genuine people out there.

Best of luck for the future.

@javava88 they are masters of deception and lies flow easily.  I was burnt so badly. Married for three years before I realised the double life. The life before me and the life that went on beside me.  I don't think I'll ever fully recover from that deceit. The entire family know how to play the game. You have handed their son a lifeline. Do they love? In their own way. I believed the love. However it's for a gain and if you remove the access path the love dies instantly.     I think if these men that trick used that very clever brain to develop a business rather than look for a marriage with someone ultimately frowned upon and unsuitable within their culture they would be millionaires.  They are clever beyond our realisation.  However I was warned over and over like I warn here but I believed every word he said. Nothing could have stopped me marrying him.  So …… now it's for me to forgive myself and move forward.  Good luck xx
-@Zig8UP

Dear sister, thank you so much for sharing your story with me🌹I can feel your pain! Just as you I chose to believe every words he said. If I did not find his TikTok story, I would probably marry him despite all opposition! Even though I have lost nothing, I still feel hurt so badly! But believe me, time heals all wounds. So I am sure one day you will go through all those pains and find a genuine partner and enjoy the life with him together. Don't give up✌️Have you ever thought that you probably would like to be cheated all the whole life? Because a cheat lifelong is not a cheat anymore😂That is my thought sometimes.

I am just a little bit surprised why it took you three years to know his true color! I have seen all the red flags at the beginning of our relationship. And all of my friends and relatives are against us. But I am so trapped into his sweet words and the good time at the beginning. I chose to trust him. At the same time I kept my eyes open. I noticed his words didn‘t match his actions. Even though he mentioned marriage many times. I told him I didn‘t want to rush into a marriage. I asked him to learn German which he never seriously did. I asked him to send me his CV so that I can try to find a job for him in Germany so that he can come with a job visa. I have never got his CV. All of he wants is marriage. His behavior makes me reluctant to marry him.

Yes they are really clever and know how to express fake love sincerely. Even at this moment when I am writing this words to you, I still don‘t want to believe that he only cheat on me. When I look at those pictures we have taken together and when I think of the good time we had especially in bed, I still believe maybe he has loved me a little bit. Sometimes I think if I married him, maybe he would still love me… It is maybe because I overthink too much so that he has no patience anymore and does not want to waste time with me…..

I am closing the chapter with this Moroccan guy and start a new page in my life. Wish you peace and love as well ❤️

@javaba88 I am so sorry to hear what has happened to you.

In our previous conversations I was really hope you had found a good one and would be happy.

Its been 5 weeks now since I spoke to my ex and have to admit I am finding it hard to move on.

They really do not understand or even probably care how much hurt they can cause.

Anyway I wish you much happiness in the future.

@javaba88 I am so sorry to hear what has happened to you.
In our previous conversations I was really hope you had found a good one and would be happy.
Its been 5 weeks now since I spoke to my ex and have to admit I am finding it hard to move on.
They really do not understand or even probably care how much hurt they can cause.
Anyway I wish you much happiness in the future.
-@Lulu1981

Dear Lulu, Thank you! It helps me to recover when I share my experience here. I know then I am not the only one. He had broken up with me when I talked with you previously. But after that I reunited with him because I still love him. Now it came the final separation.

I can understand you because it is also hard for me to move on. Even today I can help thinking of him and writing to him. It takes time for us to ge through all of these disasters! Did your ex stop to speak to you at first or you choose to stop? My ex stopped to speak to me at first😞 It seems as if I have never been in his life😞 They are scammers, cold and iron hearted and they only want to reach their goals. Their love is fake love. Therefore they don‘t care about the damages they cause.

so stay strong sister and do you have thought how to warn those other potential victims whom your ex is probably flirting with? I want to warn other women. But I am afraid of his revenge since he has my personal information.

@javava88 no he didn't just stop talk to me. We spoke nearly everyday for about 3 weeks after we split up.

He was hope we would finish on good terms and remain friends.

Each time we talked though it always came back to our relationship and we would argue. I would get upset and keep on at him and he would keep say how sorry he is and he can't be with me.  Of course then we argue more and he would get defensive.

In the end we sort of agreed to stop talk as we were just hurting more.

We still follow each other on social media but we don't talk  🥲.

Have to admit to this day I am not sure of his motives. Yes there were red flags but when you look at the green flags there were alot of them too.

Was it pressure from family, religion and

culture that got to him as he has most definetly looked more to his religion recently or was it a scam. I am still not totally sure.

I don't really know how you can let others know about your ex or if they would even want to listen.

@javava88 no he didn't just stop talk to me. We spoke nearly everyday for about 3 weeks after we split up.
He was hope we would finish on good terms and remain friends.
Each time we talked though it always came back to our relationship and we would argue. I would get upset and keep on at him and he would keep say how sorry he is and he can't be with me. Of course then we argue more and he would get defensive.
In the end we sort of agreed to stop talk as we were just hurting more.
We still follow each other on social media but we don't talk 🥲.
Have to admit to this day I am not sure of his motives. Yes there were red flags but when you look at the green flags there were alot of them too.
Was it pressure from family, religion and
culture that got to him as he has most definetly looked more to his religion recently or was it a scam. I am still not totally sure.
I don't really know how you can let others know about your ex or if they would even want to listen.
-@Lulu1981

Oh your guy is so nice. I don‘t think you met a scammer. He is forced by his family to leave you. It is possible in their culture. My guy is not so nice. He stopped talk to me suddenly and he never send me a message after that as if I never exist in his life. I am so angry that I delete all connection with him! I only still not want to delete the photos we took together. I do want to remain friends with him. But it is only my one side wish.

even his motives are leaving his country, it is not bad. Everyone wants to have a good life. But one should not pretend that he loves you and actually he does not.

Actually I have also seen green flags beside many red flags. I can not believe those good moments are all fake!

Comparing to my guy I guess your guy is not a scammer! Some of them are very religious and obey the order of the family. That is the reason why he can not go one with you. I am quite sure about your case.

Please check your message hier. I have sent you a private message.

Stay strong and try to find another one who cherishes you and wants to spend the life with you and to be your companion and make you feel not lonely but happy! Good luck, sister

@javava88 thank you for your message.

I am really hope you are right about my man. This is what I am try and believe has happened but I do always think the worse.

Hasn't helped as towards the end of our talking when we were argue over and over about the same that he would be more harsh. Everyone tells me this is because he wants me stop argue 🤷‍♀️ as he has to do as the family wants so he is say me things to push me away.

I really hope it was that but it does play on my mind and give me doubts

Not that it should matter as he has gone whatever it was.

I really wish you the best for the future and that you find someone who will cherish and take care of you. 🌹

Ladies you have to take care of yourelf. No man is worth the greef and hassle and emotional distress. I have been travelling around Morocco and met truely amazing people. Nobody tried to scam me or treat me badly. Thing is people are too attached to virtual world and online dating and it allows them to put a virtual mask on. They can be whoever they wish to be. It applies to men and women of all religions and nationalities. It is not about the culture or religions. It is about how they have been brought up by parents and it is down to morals. I believe in Karma, it works. Slowly but certainly. So be happy, focus on people who love you. And let go off the emotional pain, heal emotions that dont serve you and move on. And you will attract true love.

@javava88 hi. It took me three years because I trusted. I lived in the family home I was married we did everything together. I was part of a huge family.  I didn't look for or question.    He was not a big user of social media nor had any fake profiles. Was a respectable man holding down a responsible well paid job.     I found out by sheer accident then it uncovered a huge web of lies - which he still denies - I walked away.      I look back now and think I was stupid but at the time you deal with what is in front of you and it was real and it felt safe and happy.   I might sound depressed. I'm not. I'm glad I know now and not in 10 years time.     

@Amanda224 As far as I know Moroccan police officers aren't allowed to marry foreigners. May be I am mistaken.

@Popolushka I agree 💯🙌🏽

@javava88 dear, my Moroccan man did exactly the same. At first many high-flown words about his "love". Then he wanted to break up with me multiple times, then he broke up on the 14 of February, having written a horrible letter full of insults. On top of that he wrote  that only an idiot like me could believe an illusion. He confessed that he used me and he blamed me for letting him do that.

I don't know what these people have in common with a religious way of thinking. He is muslim praying 5 times a day and reading Quran.

He is very proud of himself for treating people like that. He says his God cares about him.

@Zig8UP they use magic, believe me. It was the same with me. I made the most stupid thing ever. I sold my flat, I took my child and came to Morocco to marry this man. Nothing could stop me. I was in a hurry. I am younger than he and much more attractive. I was not single at the moment and broke with my partner for this miserable scammer.  I was so much appealed that could hardly think logically. Now looking back I can't say why it happened to me. But I do remember that during the first months of our love affair i could not properly eat or sleep. I was totally absorbed by the thoughts about him. The whole thing was wrong and unhealthy from the very beginning.

@Vladilena I had simmilar experiences but not with Moroccan. What he has said and done has nothing to do with you. It his him and his traumas from childhood etc.....I was being called names as well but now it doesnt make me feel any bad about myself. You know who you are.  Those moroccan men live in a very conservative society full of predjudes towards European people or Americans. By the way he acted towards you I can tell that he is a very insecure man with low self-esteem. It took me years to learn all this after practicing some inner healing. Nothing of what happened to you is your fault.

@Popolushka thank you, it's important to hear. I feel so much hurt and what is worse I feel guilty for having let somebody do this to me.