loving a Vietnamese girl

They also dont like Google, it contains some truths about the corrupt system in place.

Short story. My mate was a safety manager on a pipeline project in the Middle East. The construction contractor was a Ch ahem company (no names no pack drill). He had a dispensation to travel before dawn in the mornings so that he could ensure that the correct pre start procedures were being done on the various parts of the sites.

One morning as he was driving in the dark to one of the worksites he saw lights in the desert some way off the road where no lights should be. Intrigued, he killed his own vehicle lights and slowly approached the lights in the desert. Walking the last couple of hundred meters he saw an excavator digging a hole into which the ahem company were about to bury a battered 4 x 4.........

...... Which had a couple of dead bodies in it.

The construction contractors local staff had been involved in a fatal accident and the company management had ordered the evidence to be buried rather than face the usual shut down and HSE investigations.

a sure sign of when a VN woman really cares about you is like you said:  she will always be asking you questions about:  when you ate last, what you ate, what would you like for supper, what should I get for you at the market... she may seem like she hates you when shes mad, don't worry about it unless she stops asking you the usual questions about when you ate etc... if that happens.. you know the relationship is in trouble...

How about an update jim?

Jim - Pretty much all of the advice the guys gave you is sage advice. But keep it all in perspective - eyes wide open at all times. Just remember not every story ends up in the trash with you at the bottom. In contrast to many I did not go to VN looking for a wife. I went - my first time to retrieve my VN Veteran brothers soul and bring it back home. He did not physically die there during his tour - but believe me there are conditions much worse than dying. And that was his lot. I made close friends there - related to my close friend in the states - a VN Dr. I stayed with her family and we became very intertwined in a friendship way. I kept in touch snd returned several years later this time to travel the entire country from -,Mekong to Sapa and I took my little “body guard” whom I’d become very close to - everywhere I went. She’d barely ever left the Saigon city limits before - plane, trains, buses all over that beautiful country. If you know a little about Asian women they seemingly can’t bear to know a man of good character that’s single and not try to find him a good woman to marry. I’ll skip much of the story because it’s a long and winding journey. So after my 2nd trip they began scouting for me. It just so happens that my body guard had a niece that worked for a lady at the large Canadian Life Ins Co - Manulife: she was university educated and spoke decent English. Unbeknownst to me families gathered - several pow wows about this American, his character and family, religion snd who knows what else. Since this lady was the youngest of the family and had led an extremely sheltered life - she was the diamond of the parents eyes. She’d never once ever had a date with a boy/man. Her life was entirely within the family and work. I even had to be interviewed by the older brother and wife who lived near me in LA. Apparently it all was sanctioned and she was given permission to “ talk” to me. Which we did sporadically by computer - email. I didn’t even know what she looked like. Eventually she emailed me a pic - it was then my jaw dropped to my desk top - she was an asian goddess. Comm was sporadic so I really didn’t know her. Then she wrote me the sweetest letter in every way along with more pics. She told me she was 28 - I was 48 so doubts arose about the age difference. Then suddenly she popped up in LA having gotten a much coveted student visa. She intended to take her MBA - but myself being in the cutthroat vicious world of American business for a couple of decades - i thought better and guided her softly toward the healthcare field - she gobbled up my advice and enrolled in a nursing program. Which she excelled at. Quickly got a an RN position at a UC CA Level One Trauma Center. In 14 years there she’s never received less than a “ Exceeds” in her reviews. She’s now on her way to Nurse Practitioner.

So the punch line is - I promised her family I would care for and look out for and guide her while in the US. I did just that - with great care as she was a lovely blossoming   flower. And I felt responsible for her care in a land where many, many would be thrilled to take advantage of such a sweet, naive woman such as her. Five years I took this role until one day she fell into my arms and we kissed. I knew I would have been an absolute fool if I was to let her go on her journey w/o me. I actually tried once suggesting with our age difference it may be better for her ling term with someone closer to her age. She looked up at me and said “pls don’t break my heart”. It was then I knew I had to do something. Shortly after - and 5 years in - I asked her to marry me. We’ve known each other for 20 years now and are coming up on our 16th year of marriage. I love her more today than from the beginning and it’s clear she feels the same. She’s very loyal, spiritual, beautiful inside and out. I would have been an absolute fool had I not asked gor her hand in marriage. Do you see there are VN women that make wonderful wives and you couldn’t do better.

So heed the advice given by the guys that have given it - but know there are diamonds in the mix that are there to be found. Thread lightly and seek goodness and your future wife may be out there as well. I wish you good fortune - and sorry for the long story. Believe me it could have been much longer.

Thank you sir I have now been married to this lovely lady for 4 years. She is absolutely the best thing that ever happened to me. We are back in the United States now and have been for the last 3 years. Is my mother got sick and we had to come take care of her and my wife was absolutely a sweetheart to my mother my mother loved her so much we lost her in June. I always hope to come back to Vietnam and live but frankly my wife is making great money in the nail shop and able to help her family more so we will probably never come back. Due to health reasons I had to take disability but I'm drawing the same amount on social security I would have if I went to full retirement age so we're doing okay but I do miss Vietnam so. We lost my father-in-law in March and we weren't able to go to the funeral because of covid-19 the place will not be the same without my bo

Things are great my friend. Life isn't always easy but my lovely bride rolls with it along with me we have been in the United States now for the last 3 years. She's the best thing ever happened to me she loves me unconditionally and I've never had that before sometimes I have to wake up and wonder is this a dream she has given far more than she is ever took. Actually she has taken nothing I have given all I had which is very little.

Be very careful Jim ! Ive seen a few ladies over the years, most are savy enough to not give the impression of seeing us as walking ATM for a while. check- out her FB profile, the friends she has type of people she hangs with, are they as down to earth as she is, what things interest her ( humanitarian or cosmetics, volunteering or clothes ) Yogi is on cue here, live separately for a while. Ask yourself, why, why am I so keen ? what am I possibly running from ? why did my last marriages fail ( takes 2 to tango ), how much info do I have re the cultural differences ? can I accept those differences. Religion too. The Asian mind is VERY different to the western 1. Best wishes in your search for awareness Jim, much happiness to you if she is the 1.

I have lived with her in the United States for 3 years already and live with her for a year in Vietnam I think I'm pretty safe. Not to mention that now she makes a lot more money than I do and uses it to pay our household expenses take care of mine grandson and my mother when she was alive as my mother lay dying she stood there with tears in her eyes as if it were her mother no I got a good girl