GIRLFRIEND / FIANCE/ WIFE (??) FROM COLOMBIA

@JohnyLondon I am not agree.  I am sorry that you had an unpleasant experience with a woman in Colombia. But you cannot generalize to the rest of the population from personal experience. It is as if in my case I had a bad experience with a guy from the USA, now I must say that all the guys from the USA are scammers or intend to extort.  There are bad people and good people in every country of this planet.  Is not it?

@Laker4115 totally agree 

@labt Technically you're not wrong. TECHNICALLY. However, it's difficult for a single man, who only has ~30 years of "productivity, vitality, and virility" on Earth, to meet ALL the women in Colombia. Even if he travels, lives, and socializes in multiple cities in Colombia, he'll meet a only tiny subset of eligible single and available women.

@ChineduOpara Of course. Obviously I had to express my opinion in this conversation thread, because I am Colombian, and I know this subgroup of women who, as you mention, are materialistic and perhaps have not been well educated with moral and ethical values; but their parents induce them to use their "charms" to exploit the foreigner who, because he is a foreigner, they consider to be economically wealthy. In my personal case, I have had romantic relationships with good men from Colombia, Mexico, Argentina, India. And I also had an unfortunate fleeting encounter with a man from the USA who is a scammer. As I read someone right here, as soon as they ask for money, RUN. 

@labt  i completely agree with you.  Just because one person is bad or does bad things doesn't mean all are like that.  Personally I think Colombianas are wonderful women. 

@cccmedia That could apply and be advice in any country!

@gurutogo I completely agree, living in Cartagena i never experienced that behavior

@SAVELLSTEVE373 Dude first don't write Columbia, write with O. Because none takes you serious when you make that mistake. Although you made great points.

@SAVELLSTEVE373 Colombia, not Columbia. If you want to be taken seriously about your comments.

@OsageArcher But most are bad.

@decadude Right, it's normalized in their culture to use their looks and they feel entitled. If you are raised with ppl around like that, they never even realize it is immoral.

@Laker4115 Statistics matter Bro. Just keep good people out of the context, we are talking about in general.

@marisolwest Lot of beautiful but very very a few educated women. Come on man!! 1000 in one million , yes still a lot. Lol

@nico peligro Aus guys are not so educated.

lol , i think it comes down to girl selection....i got a girl (white latina) with a good JOB as HR ...with her i only paid restaurant (you will find this everywhere on earth ),  I got another  (Black Psy professional + with average educated family ) , unstable finances + terrible decision making = struggle a little but still fine). Last case Hot latina colombian chick ...Has never held a job more than a year + Mood swing + child and poor family (most not educated) ...this one sucked the blood lol. 

What's the timeline on this, Crazy?

Are you spinning three plates or currently dating

only the one for whom you buy meals-only?

cccmedia

@cccmedia I ended with crazy and lazy one. Because she had more free time to her advantage , quit her job

. A complete train wreck for several months ...Tens of thousands of dollars burnt trying to make her happy (or prove that i am not a sexual predator ) , luxury trips (I could afford that of course ), managing her anger burts .

She was feeling unhappy yet not leaving the relationship and asking for more trips and delegating her responsabilities back to me. I exited the relationship more for the craziness and time lost rather than the money (+ A very fake person taking picture of her own smile every 5 minutes for social media , Talking about our largest expenses in public , taxis  as well as some imaginary sums of money she might earn soon to gain attention .

She lacked self awareness , overestimated herself , her beauty , her intelligence , her importent . I funded her with  two months to look for a job, she didn't . She joined many expat forums probably looking  the next dummy ....(After all her first expat experience was amazing 😆 ).

To be honest , this is totally my fault responsability i own it lol. I saw it coming but ignored the red flags and believed in her words (she was the hotest one + sweet talker ).

I also have bias now ... most good colombian women (if they doing really well in their life ) are not looking for foreigners... Most women looking for foreigners are already in trouble... It takes time and patience to find one ; unlike what expats think.

Good job, Crazy.

You learned the lesson, ditched the problem child,

reported back to the forum .. and took

responsibility.

Thumbs up!

cccmedia

I have been married to a Colombian woman for almost 13 years.  She tells me I am out of touch with Latin Culture because I get upset when she goes out until 4:00am with her single friends at least once a month.  I am never invited, even when she invites her brother or I hear some other male friend was invited.   She wants her own finances to be hers, and mine to be ours.  Her family won't help so I don't think I can take this much longer.  We have one child and I take care of her the most.  Is this normal Colombian behavior for a married woman?   Any help would be appreciated.  Thanks.

I have been married to a Colombian woman for almost 13 years.  She tells me I am out of touch with Latin Culture because I get upset when she goes out until 4:00am with her single friends at least once a month.  I am never invited, even when she invites her brother or I hear some other male friend was invited.   She wants her own finances to be hers, and mine to be ours.  Her family won't help so I don't think I can take this much longer.  We have one child and I take care of her the most.  Is this normal Colombian behavior for a married woman?   Any help would be appreciated.  Thanks.

@j33680  Sounds like you're being taken advantage of. Probably cheated on. I'm sorry to inform you of this.

@j33680 That's not acceptable in any culture. As the man of the house, you need to set expectations and hold her (and you) accountable to those. That's the way finances go for us providers but she needs to understand that privilege comes with a price.

@j33680 Not at all normal & you're reading the red flags correctly. Take care of your daughter sir. The writing is on the wall.

The good news, you can trade up in Colombia pretty easy and find a beautiful woman that does not cheat on you.  Good men in Colombia are in short supply.  You should do well.  Advice, if she does not adapt to your needs, kick her to the curb.

Sorry to disappoint all of you but it's not abnormal for married women in Colombia to go out with her friends, single or married for dinner and drinks. Does she gets home at 4am? Probably, that is when some of the bars close, and in Colombia where there is music and dance you probably don't go home until the bar closes, keep in mind the real party in a bar starts after 11pm and people will dance even around the tables when the dance floor is too small.

Thanks for the replies.  Just wanted to get someone else take on it.  Had a feeling I was being taken advantage of and cheated on.  During the Pandemic things were nice, cause she didn't want to go to populated places.  As soon as it was over, she was back out with her friends.  I always asked her, why don't we have friends that are couples.  Had a few but she never liked them.  She always wanted to be with her single friends and leave me home to take care of the house and my baby girl.  Sad but what can you do, right?

go with your gut feelings. easier said than done. love is a poison sometimes. one of my hottest girlfriends in college was a slutty party animal, but she was hot as hell. i put up with it for a few months until all my friends where saying i was stupid. eventually i broke it off.

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@j33680 Had a wife there for 5 years, never would she do that. She takes care of the home and watches the money, there is no bullshit. If she wanted to go party to 4 AM, no worries. You are lucky you are in Colombia, she is easy to replace and get someone with good habits. If she was in the US you would be stuck forever. There is no need to put up with drama there, plenty of good girls looking for a guy that is decent and pays the bills.

Been married to a Colombian woman for 57 years.  It is very normal for Colombian women to have lots of female friends who go out together to relax and exchange ideas.  I know her friends and sometimes we will go out with all of our spouses.  If you are going out to drink and dance this should be done as a married couple and not a bunch of single friends.  Your wife needs to get rid of these single friends and find some married ones so you can all go out together.  Otherwise it is time to dump her.

@Brandon Zacharie  You are dead  right  mate , woman of any country  hey if your with  1  man its 1 only ! I have a woman from a foreign country, but i tell you what,  there  are rules - and there must be rules !  The country my other half comes from  its full of bums and devious pricks,  that would sell there own mother  for $2 !   I do not allow  the trash in the door !

Being an Australian,  we are proudly known for putting the brakes on  with a woman, in respect to that crap ( oh il just go out with my friends ) Yes bullshit to that huh . The friends will  be as i chose! ( i'm paying the way in life so you know - the lets be fair policy must apply ) Id say to her if you don't like it darling?  then you just get Sombrero Sam,  the local alcoholic to pay your way  in life !

That is what you say to them. Its amazing how quickly  they soon pull themselves into gear !

The greatest memory lapse these  birds from other countries  all seem to have,  is they lose site of the fact that  we  don't have to be there,  and they ))) miss hot pants ))) without you  has  this great percentage of absolutely nothing !!!!  Isn't that a fact !

Problem with the worlds women these  days 'there is a lot of the 'beggar be the chooser '' about them , and in 85% of cases they want all your gold so to  speak , ( as in support and kindness ) but most have nothing to offer  you!  - bar deceit !

Columbia  has  so much deceit in the women  there , that you could peal it off in layers and  fill up 18  ton trucks with it . Not many honest deals in relations takes place  in dear old Colombia. Mostly its all a one way street, and she thinks she owns the street .

Glad mine is not from that country .

@loaferln Unfortunately, I am in the US.  She came up here as a student, over stayed, I married her.  Got her residency, she became a citizen and started bringing her whole family up here.  Once they got up here it was them first, my daughter second, and then me.  I didn't think her actions were right but when I would start thinking abut leaving her with my daughter, things would start to get a little better.  Now they are just terrible and think it is time to go.

@j33680 Sorry, every time I look at that Affidavit of Support for a visa for my wife I put it back on the counter and think about all the words of advice I received from members on this site. Just can't bring myself to sign a contract with the Federal Government plus have the State riding along for the ride. I just make my trips to Colombia but all is not paradise, my better half is getting very upset with my foot dragging and asks about the visa on a regular basis. All ready donated 2 houses to my ex in California, life is good right now and I have no desire to up my level of drama here. Even in Colombia, I just watched my nephew a professional there in the same situation as you. He had a live in girlfriend/common law wife for the last five years and her 2 kids. She did not work, spent the day in the gym then the bars till 10 PM. Just moved out, took his car, left the kids and went to live with the new boyfriend in Sincelejo. I have a neighbor here that is married to a Chinese lady, now that is 1 mean woman, he cannot even come over to my shop for a visit and a beer, but she is calling him within 10 minutes, I think he told me 1 time he would gift wrap her and send her back if he could. He told me not to get married, I didn't listen to him but I decided to leave my true love in Colombia to let the marriage season a little.

@loaferln Be careful.  Cause just within the the last few months, I found out that my brother-in-law was not my wife"s full brother.  Her mom was screwing  some other guy while he was taking care of the family business.  I found this out a couple years ago before the poor guy died of Corvid.   When I heard that, I thought of course she will see what her mom did to hurt the family, and see we could make a better family.  Working together,  But never happened.  not cool.

@Xavier Varela-Rosales Ah yes, perhaps you're one of the friends eh? Married are ya? Of course not.

At any rate, it's def NOT normal in any marriage I'm aware of here in Colombia.

All true, many stories. Just better to keep your love in Colombia. Then the problems are less and if there is a problem much easier to fix. Besides here in the US many can not even figure out what sex they are, Ja Ja.

Well loaferin,

It is all just a lottery. I was advised to not marry and bring my wife to the USA. That she would stay two years and then take off. I did not listen and married her in Colombia and she is now with me for over twenty years. Best decision I ever made. You have to be aware and follow your heart.

elp

@Lpdiver I am happy for you, God bless.