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Meeting people, making friends etc...

Last activity 04 January 2024 by ckvaca2019

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whgwhg001

Forgive me, I am a bit confused: Lately, I have been doing quite a lot of research on Portugal online and am keen on moving there later next year. I want to spend a week in Portugal this November to check out some areas in order to rent a furnished house. And after living in Portugal for a while (to get the feel of the country), I want to buy a property me and my dogs. Am retired, single and have lived in 7 countries for an extended period of time (each country for more than two years). Hopefully this will be my last move!

I have only been to Portugal once (many years ago) and loved it (wine, cheese, bread, sausages are important to me, haha). I know that being on vacation is always different from actually living in a country. During the last few days though, I have been reading various ?negative? postings re making friends etc. And that concerns me.

I fully understand that no Portuguese is waiting for my arrival and that I have to make the effort myself. While I was working, it was of course easy to make new friends. Now that I am older and retired, that is difficult in most if not all countries. I am already studying the language online, hope that helps me settle quicker and easier.

What I cannot deal with easily though is xenophobia.  Is that prevalent in Portugal or are Portuguese just ?distant?, initially? I have often read that Portuguese are very friendly and helpful people. Yes I understand, there is a difference between friendly and being a friend. But what is it like to live in ?country areas?, are people willing to engage with foreigners? Is there enough to do? Yes, I am planning on doing charity work etc, as has been recommended by members of this forum. I have no plans on becoming a lonely old fart?

I don?t want to live in a big city like Porto of Lisbon but like to be within an hour or so of Lisbon airport (I travel regularly during ?normal? times). ?On paper?, I like the Silver Coast a lot, the area around Ericeira, Lourinha and Caldas da Rainha looks great to me. I have not yet eliminated the Algarve, the weather there seems great.  I feel though that the annual tourist invasion would drive me completely nuts. Porto is too cold for me.

Any thoughts or comments would be much appreciated, thank you!

GuestPoster316

Hello,

Some of the things you are saying are true such as, yes it's difficult to make friends in Portugal, especially if you don't speak the language. Well, it's my case also. Being an older woman is also difficult but what makes it even harder is being new to a country. Yes Portuguese can appear to be quite 'reserved and distant' especially with foreigners but I wouldn't call it 'xenophobia' either. Portugal is a very safe country. Perfect for a single woman, old or young. You won't see any violence here like in the USA or Canada. They have their habits and traditions.
Why don't you try the city called 'Fatima' ? It's a very nice little town in Santarem, where it's very easy to find a furnished place to live and not expensive like in Lisbon or in the Algarve, where you're going to have a hard time finding anything. It's about one hour from Lisbon airport and they have many non stop buses for as little as
2.99 euros ! Imagine, it's a bargain. Buses are reliable and comfortable too.  I often take it to go to Lisbon or at the airport, as I often travel. Since Lisbon has become so expensive, unless you really have to be there, I wouldn't recommend it unless you have a big budget of course but depending where you live in Lisbon, it can be quite noisy.

Beside that, the food is really cheap in Portugal and going to the restaurant is not expensive either, even if the country lacks variety.

On a final note, I would recommend to take your time before buying a property in Portugal. You will have to do a lot of research.

Cordially,

Julia

JohnnyPT

Unfortunately there are no friends for sale in the supermarket ... :(

First of all, it's worth defining what "a true friend" is.

eg.
https://themighty.com/2019/04/what-is-a-friend/

Are you looking for friends or known acquaintances?

Let's put it this way. If I arrive in Switzerland, will I find true friends easily ?
What do I need to do without waiting for others to do it for me?

In Portugal, it's the same. Answers to your questions are in yourself and not in others.

From your answers, I see that you have already read my answers on this subject in other topics, so I don't need to repeat them here.

GuestPoster316

As a Portuguese Ibcan say that being distant and reserved depends also on location. The North is known for its friendliness while in Lisbon people may seem more cold. However no xenophobia happens. Unfortunately some tourists fail to understand that they are the ones that n3ed to adapt to the country they are visiting and expect everyone to adapt to their needs. You will find people helpful and everyone tries to speak english especially in the main urban centres. In small villages and inland it can be a bit more difficult language wise. You are correct in avoiding algarve. It is a nightmare especially during high season. The places you mentioned are amazing. The whole Oeste region is delightful and you can find good houses at reasonable prices. Another great region is Costa Vicentina, much less touristy than Algarve and with stunning beaches.

In summary, making friends can take time but if you are adaptable, respect our culture and are willing to learn the language I believe you will be absolutely fine here.

Galoppin

If you are retired and single I think that you need to find a town where you can easily meet expats too, take language classes etc without it being too big so that the locals get to recognise you.
We live in a big fishing village ( Fuseta) with activities for those interested, enough restaurants and bars where to meet others, "alive" even in winter...
A good mix of expats and friendly portuguese neighbours.
Personally I would avoid the big cities
Good research!

Dalila Dias

I beg to differ.... we love it in the Algarve and are barely bothered by the tourists since we live at walking distance from all restaurants and the beach. It might be different in western Algarve but east of Olhio it is ok. The busiest is August when the parking is impossible.
But we never experience any kind of traffic problems like in the south of France when driving to get groceries !

elizabethkunstler

After visiting much of Portugal we have personally decided on Ericeira, asit is 30 min from Lisbon and that was important to us. Otherwise, we spent several months near Caldas da Rainha and absolutely love it there. We have only recently started to make friends, mostly because we have decided to permanently live here and not be seen as a tourist. We have a few friends that are Portuguese, but the others are Finish, Canadian, and other immigrants. We are more than friendly, and hope to make more friends as time goes by.

kevhogan66

I live in south central Portugal in a town called Ferreria Do Alentejo and never had a problem. It?s an hour from Lisbon and 90mins to the Algarve with a small ex pat community and very friendly and helpful locals.

whgwhg001

A thank you to everybody who has responded to my posting. I am happy to read that my worries were unfounded (at least to a great extent) and am looking forward to live in Portugal. Great to have such forums, with people willing to respond to questions etc.

kevhogan66

Best of luck fella 👍

moryvonne

Hi Elizabeth

Im heading to the algarve for a month next month to hunt around.... Any advice will be welcomed...

Yvonne
Ireland

vsilcox

This thread is extremely helpful to us.  Thanks to all the responders!

GuestPoster316

Yes thanks to all the posters! I just made it to PT this week for my first visit from the USA. I hope to find a property to buy then visit more often until I can stay much longer. The silver coast does seem to have so great opportunities though I was initially anchored on the Algarve (which I visit tomorrow). I may end up in the Lourihna area and if so will be planning to take language classes to support connecting with the locals - thus far I have seen only great attitudes by locals helping out this non-portugese speaking American.

Would love to hear from others that may be in or planning to locate anywhere from Caldas de Rainha to Santa Barbara --maybe there is a separate expat group for this area?

JohnnyPT

Hi W99kim, Welcome :)

There are many meet up groups you can join.

How to build a social circle from scratch in Portugal

https://www.expat.com/forum/viewtopic.php?id=909130

Best Regards

Miss J0
@whgwhg001
Hello, I've just joined the forum and have read your posts from June last year, just wondered how you got on in your move to Portugal and where about you decided to move to? 
I have put in an offer on a tiny house in Central Portugal and wanted to know how hard it was to meet people, any help would be appreciated thanks
GuestPoster316
@Miss J0 Hi, I would say my move was a bit difficult since I could not find a place to live in Lisbon so I had to go more in the center of the country. It is quite cold in the winter and I had to leave my first rental apartment since it was not insulated and therefore extremely noisy and cold. The second is a bit better as far as the noise is concerned but still very cold, no heater. I bought one but it's not the same. Apparently, from reading all the comments. it's the same problem for all the new comers and I am no exception. 

Beside that, all the bureaucracy of being established was quite challenging especially during Covid where offices were closed and so on... 

As far as 'making friends' not easy. It will take a very very long time. Also depends on your age. Acquaintances are one thing, true friends can be counted on one hand usually. Without speaking Portuguese, you will usually make only expat friends or friends that are from the same country as yours unless they speak fluent English.

But let us know how it goes with you.

Julia
BongoBoy
@juliajonesjy 

If you could since you reside in Portugal can you tell me if Algarve is worth it? I want MUSIC, GOLF, BEACH, more metropolitan area. I am going to plan a visit at a golf resort say like in December, but I hear the weather isn't so good and lots of golf courses are closed. 

Thanks 
GuestPoster316
Personally I wouldn't choose the Algarve, too crowded, too expensive and too small compared to the number of people going or living there. Also, way too many Brits (nothing personal,) , While it's a personal choice, I wouldn't want to live in the Algarve for all those reasons but it's nice to visit. Also, only one airport quite far from everything else. I don't really play golf so I don't know much about that but it rains a lot in Portugal. I live in the center of the country and it's still quite cold.  In fact, it's cold from November until mi-April.
JohnnyPT
Sorry but this is off topic. 
Each person is different. You both have different goals and personal choices (it is very obvious to me). There are places to live that adapt better to each person, according to their life and personal goals.

... and fortunately that in Portugal it is not summer all year round, because otherwise this would be the extension of the Sahara desert (!) Thank God  1f60e.svg
BongoBoy
@juliajonesjy 

So far down the road but I want a place that is vibrant, not too crowded, near the ocean and close to big cities and lots of premiere golf. The videos I saw of oceanic historical buildings looked close to Lisbon 
GuestPoster316
Close to Lisbon would be perfect but it's quite difficult to find a place to live, at first. It also depends on your budget. Usually, landlords ask foreigners, 'a Portuguese guarantor ;  well, I saw that in many ads, which, of course, you don't have when you move to a new country and it's difficult to find someone you don't know to pretty much guarantee that if you don't pay, they  will. Being close to the ocean is the best !
FriendlyG

@whgwhg001


Hi...I'm a Portuguese lady living in Algarve,if you need any help in this area send me an email to [Moderated]


Best Regards



Moderated by Bhavna 2 years ago
Reason : Contact details should not be posted on the forum. Thank you
We invite you to read the forum code of conduct
Lentzion

Thanks so very much. However  the policy here is not to exchange personal information.

Are there any websites or agencies that can assist with searching for a place to rent? I am on Idealistia.

I really like the small town . A town that comes to life during the holidays.

duntov67


Lentzion,      I recommend the below link for Savvy Cat Realty as they are both rental and buyers relocation assistance experts that I used to great success when relocating from KY USA to Portugal.  Good luck!


[link moderated]



Jk1976

After having been in Portugal for almost two months, I can say that it helps a lot to visit expat meetings (my wife gets them through facebook groups), but you could also use the Meetup app, which has many Portuguese and non-Portuguese members that enjoy meeting others for hikes, sports etc.


We also joined Portuguese lessons which helped to meet more people. So in short, we've been actively trying to meet others and that is key.

Most of our contacts that have become friends have children in similar age groups with similar interests. When you arrive here, assume at least two months of complete chaos in case you need to look for a long-term rental furniture etc. It should get better after that. Beaches are awesome, so is the food. Learning the language, in my opinion, is a must (despite the Portuguese being good English speakers).

GuestPoster316

@juliajonesjy Hi, I have been doing lots of research about portugal lately because I want to visit, please can we keep intouch so that I could get some assistance from you about the place. is my Gmail, thanks a lot

Moderated by Bhavna last year
Reason : Contact details
We invite you to read the forum code of conduct
GuestPoster316

@FriendlyG Hi, I'm planning to visit from Ghana(Africa), and I want to make friends before I come, pls is there a way we could contact each other?, thanks

JohnnyPT

Hi Bukari,


Please read my post #3 above, in this thread. What is your purpose of looking for "friends" here? Nobody here provides funding for travel or accommodation....


Posts of this type are not welcome.


If you want information about visas, you can find it in this thread:


https://www.expat.com/forum/viewtopic.php?id=950421


Have a nice year.

ckvaca2019

@whgwhg001 Good morning.  I as well is considering moving there and visiting this November.. I'm  in my 50. When exactly are you going?  Maybe we could meet and check it out together? 

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