In Love with a Dominican woman

Sorry -  I disagree a bit. IF she is that into you,  she will ALWAYS find time for a quick message. I don 't know any woman who will go that length of time every day without communications!  I call bull shit right there.  We make time for those we WANT or NEED to speak with or communicate with.

Groby - you are doing great honey!  And oh yes that intimacy stuff..... OMG that is so dead on.... You had me laughing....

Jac, as I've said before, if you want to ride that bus, you must pay the fare, financially. emotionally & with the knowledge that you don't ever know the destination or the final true cost of the ride.  Some adventures are best left to others with more experience,& they too can lose in the end.   Wisdom seldom comes cheaply, there is always a price to pay.  The trick is to keep from going bankrupt.  Listen to the others & give your ego a rest, it is not serving you well right now.   Sanity rides a fine line in life. It is a fence you can not straddle, EVER!    Be wise..... fantasize. You cannot live a fantasy except in you mind, never in daily life.   Heed the others wise advice & may you choose the right bus.

Oh man take the blinders off before you make a HUGE mistake

Bob K

She's talking to me again! She was angry because I accused her of being with another man between 11:00 pm & 10 am.  She said she's in bed alone @ that time. She needs her sleep because she has to get up early & get her children ready for school & open up her shop.  She also pointed out that I'm not available during the day Monday - Friday because I'm working. But, she doesn't get upset or jealous when she can't reach me.  I believe her story.  She loves me.  I apologized for accusing her...that will never happen again.  Finally, God has given me the right woman!

I will repeat we make time for those important to us.  And really a grown up mature woman doesn't punish you for accusing her.  Did you accuse or ask a question? Think about it.

My spidey senses are all tingling......

Enjoy the ride but bring a HUGE basket with you to pick up all the pieces.  This has disaster written all over it.

Bob K

Jac, even the chickens cattle & hogs feeding at the trough have no idea of their impending doom.  So feed away & the axe will fall. How you ever got to 70 without crashing & burning is beyond all understanding.  Make your peace with the pain & horror about to befall upon you.

gypsy401

Amen to that

Bob K

Gypsy  I love the way you say things!!!

Oh riiiiigghhhhhht.....Ashley Madison most likely is not a known event here in the DR among the natives.....ok just rambling a bit.

I made it to 70 by being a very shrewd, calculating man. This woman has been able to overcome a lot & now owns her own salon. She didn't allow the circumstances she was born into to keep her down. She's ambitious & if I can help her climb out, I'm more than willing. She's very smart, wise. She impresses me.  I'm tired of the games American woman play. I want a woman who can please me in every way. She didn't play coy, she showed me everything with a matter of weeks. Anything I wanted, she was willing to comply.

Compliance is a two way agreement. She will teach you her agreements, pay attention. The rewards are limitless. Don't forget she has made it this far without you. She can go on without you. Your willingness to help, she will slice and dice it to help others also.  As long as she is a part of her existence up until the time she leaves, she will alwsys share anything above and beyond her diré necessities.

Well I certainly hope you are right!  lets all wait and see!

I am holding my breath

Bob K

Let me know when I turn blue

Bob K

Ah, Jac.  Your rectum is not a fit place for your head. I suggest that you remove it at once.  Otherwise you could be eating sh.**t for the rest of your life.

I think it is a for-gone conclusion that many of us (but not all) believe Jac is making a huge mistake. Perhaps however we should give him a break, after all it is his mistake to make and his alone. Is it not true that Greg and Tom have found the same love for a DR Senorita? I don't see any regret coming from there words. Indeed, they seem to be very happy.
So Jac, if she makes you happy, and you can make her happy and can offer her what she needs, enjoy. Once you are past the honeymoon stage, you will truly know.
Thanks Groby, you helped me see this discussion from a different prospective.

Yup we all are waiting Stan.  None of us wish ill on anyone.  We do however know the odds.   Hoping he breaks the odds and does well!

A snow ball's chance in hell has better odds

Bob K

Stan, yes they found love, but I bet it wasn't one visit & a very short one at that.  Nor was it spent on the net either.  You know that Groby lived their life & knows it intimately. Tom can tell you how his relationship developed. Again, it wasn't an overnight affair that made it work for them.  I may be an addlepated, ancient Gypsy, but I shan't be a fool twice over.     A fall from Grace isn't too bad, as long as the bed isn't too high.   I wish Jac a soft landing when the time comes.     My last Dominican girl friend  was half my age.  She owned her own home, had 2 grown sons, a good job & never asked for a thing.  When I wanted to give her something it was because I wanted too, not because it was asked for or even hinted at.  She wanted me to move into her house, told me that I would save a lot not having to pay the rent of my own place.  I turned it down as it would have changed the dynamics of the relationship.  She cleaned, did laundry, washed my back & the sex was joyful, fun & most of all free of inhibitions.  In the 8+ years in the DR, I was fortunate to have had 3 such women in my life.  None were "working girls" or found in bars or on line.  Of course in between I availed myself occasionally of the other sort for fun & games.  No saint am I, but much more satisfied with just one good honest woman. There are more good women then one would think.  They are just harder to find.  It requires time, patience, & of course, good luck.  Jac, remember what I said about the placement of you head.

Oh gypsy......el viejo lobo del mar.

Gypsy you are an amazing man!

Just out of curiosity what ever happened with your dominicana?

Groby.  estoy Viejo si, pero no pendejo !!

Just reading some of these old posts I can't stop laughing 😂😀. That gypsy guy is funny as f*** . What ever happened to poor Jac?  And did he take gypsie's advise about removing his head.......?I'm intrigued now lol

Groby,  I swim in your wake amigo.

to the Brit,  When I had to move back to Florida, I couldn't bring her.  She spoke no English at all.  I heard from her cousin that she met a fine gentleman & is happily married. I'm very glad for her as she deserves a good life.  When I'm able to return to the DR, I'm sure another one shall find me.  Good to know that I make you laugh, but the basic message is a very serious one. I have found that people listen if you don't pontificate.  There is humor in all aspects of life, even in the hardest of times.  I prefer laughter to crying, but sometimes can't avoid the tears.

Two words to define.

1. Pontificar - español.....
Meaning.........embelishment of nothing.

2. Gypsy - english....
Meaning......shortest distance between two points is a straight line.

Greg, thanks for the edification

Right on Gypsy !!! That's what I always say " Estoy viejo pero no pendejo "  I happen to have down to earth Gringo friends and their expression as usual is " I might be Gringo pero no pendejo " I love the way you put things together !!!   Another words " If the shoe fits then you must wear it " my friends !!  Right on Gypsy more power to you man !!

I am willing to go out on the gang plank and suggest that there is a common ground of respect happening here between Gypsy and myself. When I refer to him as "the old wolf of the sea", this is complementary in every way. Battle scares and experience define a "warrior". Even though he says things differently than I do, it is understood. Then there is the fact he really does not say all he wants to say. "You want the truth?" "You can't handle the truth!". Sound familiar?

1st time visiting? There are beautiful women all over this place that will tend to you, some people call it the Dominican Republic, I call it Paradise.

Laac334 - I met a lovely woman before I went to The DR and man did I like her. She was 6 years my junior and smoking hot. Cooked, cleaned for me and gave me some good loving, and took great care of me.  I know these simple things are enough for us men that were living in a country where just those simple things are almost nonexistent. So when you get them you feel great. The things people are telling you on this forum is 100% correct. Spend some time here, you can rent an apartment for a month or two on different websites and I actually did exactly what planner said after "dating" her for about 6 months and surprised her one day I showed up her house without a word that I was ever coming. She was in tears happy to see me, so much so that if she was acting she should definitely be in Hollywood better than any actress I've ever seen. I said by the way I'm staying for at least a month. She had no problem with this and seemed happy about it. Things were going really great for a while. But then I started noticing some things. Every day when she came home from work her phone was on silent. When I asked why she said because she was with me and did not want to talk to anybody. Red Flag #1. Later on her phone I noticed some guy was trying to talk to her on Skype when I asked her who it was she said she did not know Red Flag #2  One day she says she's going shopping and she's gone for five hours without answering my many phone calls to return with 4 things all for her hair which she probably bought in 30 minutes in the pharmacy that was downstairs from my apartment. Redflag #3. Then I found a flavored condom in her purse. That was enough red flags for me to stop trying to figure out if something was going on and only wondered with how many. They also mentioned you should live like Dominicans and I 100% agree. I stayed with her at her house for a week with No A/C , lights going out all the time, freezing showers, taxis, busses  and rice and beans diet. You need to see what their life is really like so that you can understand what they are going through and how bad they want out. You need to see them getting ready for work at 7 am to catch the bus to make it to work by 9 and working hard until 7 pm everyday for $221 per month. (This was really her salary) This completely changed my outlook and I started looking at things from their perspective. They're not bad people it's just they have a really tough life.. However what is amazing is how close their families are and actually seem to be overall happy despite their poor economic circumstances.  Now I will take a different approach and tell you this does not mean you should stop seeing her, go ahead and take a chance but you need to visit here at least one month and longer if possible so you can really get to know them. You can see if they do have a job but are turning tricks on the side to get some help with buying clothes, perfumes, getting  their hair done etc. (This happens all the time). It was not until I stayed here for one month until I truly had a grasp on things going on and I'm sure if I stayed longer reality would open up even more. I'm going to go with if it makes you happy then see her however do not make the same mistake I did and fall in love so hard before you spend some time in the country and truly get to see how they live.  I fell in love thinking I was the only one, but time reveals many things and I ended up broken hearted. I came to the conclusion that if you are going to start seeing these women they have games, way better than any women in the states and way better than you amigo.  I'm sure she's really attractive and tends to you well, but believe me there are plenty to go around so if she does hurt you don't stay sad too long because there is another beautiful one right behind her. They are speaking the truth by telling you to really spend some time in DR and your perspective will change I promise you. It's not my business if you have any assets to protect I'm just saying if you do don't be foolish at the age of 70 and rush into a marriage only to lose it all later. Take your time, get to know her. But more importantly get to know the DR and you will start seeing patterns. Alot of these women married or not have men on the side, also in different countries that come to visit them a few times per year and take them on to a nice hotel to have a good time. Put yourself in their shoes where you are living with no stable electricity A/C, and cannot afford a vacation. Someone is nice and takes you on a great vacation also with the possibility of them getting to leave the country. What would you do? Honestly?  She may be good to you but there are a lot of beautiful women in this country that will cater to you. If you can live there ideally for a year I would suggest that way before ever thinking about taking her out of the Dominican Republic. Then if she messes up while you live in DR great just saved yourself a fortune and you can meet another beautiful senorita. This is a tradeoff understand? She's hoping someone will take care of her and you're getting a beautiful woman half your age. There's nothing wrong with that but just understand what it is and understand these women are opportunist so if she sees you as a way out once she's in your country is she going to upgrade again once she is there? I do believe people really can and do fall in love  here but there are a lot of relationships here  that is a total sham. Probably 70% at least.  When you actually find out how life works here and the tourists that visit these women it probably will break your heart the 1st time you truly realize how things work out here. Give yourself time before falling  to hard for this woman.  By all means demand a prenup hopefully to lessen the blow if she decides to divorce you. I'm not sure how prenups would work if she signed them in DR and you try to bring them to the states it's more complicated than just marrying someone from USA with a prenup.  Perhaps someone here knows a good lawyer that can help you with this.  It's a great country some of the things I love about it ordering a beer from the convenience of my home, great food, lots of freedom (beautiful easy women) are the same things that break my heart when I fall in love with them. They were easy for me, they're also easy for EVERYONE else. Enjoy yourself, but guard your heart. Take your time.

classygringo great post.  However I fear it will fall on deaf ears. 

Bob K

Gypsy, Groby. The road of life is not always paved. I look forward to reading your posts. Always enlightening. Please don't stop sharing.

Groby,  The gang plank is actually a bridge connecting us.  I am proud to have attained the "Old wolf of the sea" status. We shall continue on this perilous journey through life. I salute you Greg, with respect & honor.   And yes, I do with hold some thoughts & try to soften the hammer blows of reality.  We are just tourists on this journey through this amazing thing called life.   DAMN, didn't win the power ball lottery ! ........ But I win me.

Classy gringo, truth is like the old Howard Johsonsons',  28 flavors. everyone is sure to find one that they like.  Good post, please continue them, thanks, from the "Tinker"

The Brit -  welcome.  I assume your question was aimed at the original poster and his  "girlfriend" - not a lot of time has passed since he posted and he has not been  back in the last few days.  Lets see if he returns.

Gypsy and Groby  have a man crush going on......... 

Classygringo -  well said.   

I took a different track-  when I first moved here I lived in a very poor neighborhood by myself. I immersed myself in living Dominican. When a local says to me how hard it is  you don't know what it is like  -  I stop them and tell my story - I do know what it is like. I had no electricity 12 hours a day.I only had running water in my bathroom, nothing in the kitchen. Hot water -  I don't think so. No screens but lots of noise on the street.   I lived on my salary at the time of US 300 a month!   I did NOT use my savings. I had that experience and it was the best thing I could do.  The reason I have been successful here is because I get it.

I dated a guy for  6 months,  close to my own age, so called good guy who taught me a lot about the culture.  We broke up when I found out he still lived with his mother and sister  in Montellano (I was in Puerto Plata)   and he danced all over my feet. Can you imagine?  Oh and his mother..........hahahahaha.............that was his wife!  I learned fast and not made that mistake again. 

And over time I learned the following:  IF  expats are coming here FOR someone -  it likely wont last and neither will they.  IF they are coming here for themselves - 80% won't last 2 years.  That the stats my friends.

Planner and I might add if they are coming with baggage if follows them and usually gets bigger and heavier.

Bob K