Vietnam girlfriend

Ta he'llnpi  This is what I have been told. I am not sure if I will persue the Saigon gig. Too many shirt rules. The very ones like we had  in our own countries like ..... You can't wear a T shirt in here etc . Find Thailand so free by comparison. Pity cause this lady has been so kind to me and is a lovely lady

I love the way some blokes like TITTO pontificate about their vast knowledge of Asia and specifically Asian women. Anyone half switch on can work out all the stuff he is going on about after one week in Soi 4 Nanna, BKK
Keep the advice that is being served up as though you have lived here all your life. You may notice I have not described myself as an X pat even though I rent a condo and been in BKK 11 months. I'm not that pretentious

jacksamau, I think you replied to wrong thread but I may as well answer you here too. BTW,I like how I draw from over 15 years of staying in SE Asia and am being labeled all kinds of stuff while you nonchalantly state that all this (about SE Asian women) can be learned 1 week in Soi 4 Nanna, BKK (which you seem to know well apparently).

jacksamau wrote:

Ta he'llnpi  This is what I have been told. I am not sure if I will persue the Saigon gig. Too many shirt rules. The very ones like we had  in our own countries like ..... You can't wear a T shirt in here etc . Find Thailand so free by comparison. Pity cause this lady has been so kind to me and is a lovely lady

I might have misread you because your sentences don't make much sense (persue?too many shirt rules?Are you using iPhone?) but are you are seriously thinking of leaving Saigon and this girl just because you can't get it on with the girls as easy as in Thailand? After all the praise you had for Saigon and Vietnam? Vietnam is not restricted that much, unless you talk about the sex. You could always marry this kind and lovely lady and legally sleep with her anywhere,right?

Khanh44,I think you got your answer about the intentions and seriousness sooner than you thought.

But hey,so you won't say I only diss, let me give you useful advice : rent a place where there is no landlord present or where other expats live or something like that and you might be able to sneak this girl in the room here and there. There are even many families who rent the rooms to foreigners and while they are afraid of police and will grind their teeth when people bring girls or prostitutes they will allow it to certain extent because money is money. You see,good advice,you can't learn that at nana.

Hello guys

Could we just avoid personal attacks please? That would be great

Keep cool

Thanks.

Karen

Yes I am on an IPod in fact and print is small but once again. Read your own stuff back to yourself. " you could marry her" or "sneak her in ..."
I have known her two weeks. Do the sums. Also not about to sneak around anyone and I also think its not respectfull to her. Lets leave it there. Read my first post. I have had some reasonable advice about my question until Mr Vietnam gave us all needed advice about Asian women and western men. Oh and a little about western women . We're you a school teacher in a previous life. I'm out of this particular blog

jacksamau wrote:

hi, I am wondering how to see my Vietnamese girlfriend. She works at a food place evenings. I often meet her after and during the day visit her sister on bike etc. So here is the question. I haven't even kissed her yet let alone anthing further. Vietnamese law means she cannot stay at my hotel or I at her place. I did not realize Vietnam was so restrictive. I see other men with female partners. What's the secret???

read through all your post n I realize that your relationship is not up to that yet.dont expect to hold her hand or kiss her. she is not ready yet.she said will make out with you means we may be able to hang out with you in some day that she free.it can be going out,having lunch or dinner n talking,chatting.that's it and that's all. you may want to talk and date her out to get to know her better,but traditional type like her will prefer a steady growth of feeling first.take your time and accompany her for a while.when she is ready,she will look for you,give you a sign to move further in this relationship

Good advice Christine . Thanks for the input . I guess the big negative is I don't think I could live in a country with this closet negative attitude towards what adults do in their own. Wonder what the attitude is to gay relationships. ... My main reason for maybe living abroad is the Nanna state the government has created in Australia with all the RULES. Maybe Thailand will have to do. Mind you in only 4 weeks can see how addictive Vietnam is .

jacks au

and now we all know what has charmed you here
hope you have good experience while you are here

Regarding VN women and western men in hotels, I am pretty dang white and my wife is Vietnamese. We have never had anyone question us even though I have a US passport and she has a VN passport (with a US permanent resident card). But then again we both wear wedding rings and speak English together, so it is pretty obvious we are married.

I think that places called "Nha Nghi" or something similar are popular places to go where you can rent a room. I don't quite understand it, but I think it is either a place to take a nap or a place to hang out. I asked someone about what it was one time and my Vietnamese was not good enough to fully understand the answer.

Before we were married my wife and I stayed in hotels in DaNang, PleiKu, SaiGon, Nha Trang and Tuy Hoa.  In almost 5 years we only had one problem at a Vietnamese-style hotel near Tan Son Nhat airport.  We had to rent 2 rooms because she did not have my family name on her passport.

jacksamau wrote:

hi, I am wondering how to see my Vietnamese girlfriend. She works at a food place evenings. I often meet her after and during the day visit her sister on bike etc. So here is the question. I haven't even kissed her yet let alone anthing further. Vietnamese law means she cannot stay at my hotel or I at her place. I did not realize Vietnam was so restrictive. I see other men with female partners. What's the secret???

When I was with my g/f in Vietnam, she just straight up asked the hotel if it's ok for her to stay overnight with me in a Saigon hotel.  When we were travelling across VN for a 3 week trip and had to stay at different hotels, she always called up the hotels before hand to ask.  All she needed to do was show ID.

Long story short, 3 star hotels and lower need more business, and are more willing to allow foreigners to be with their g/fs.  4 star and higher are more likely to refuse you guys. 

You also need to look at the receptionist, get a feel for what kind of person they are, and you should be able to tell if they will accept you or not.

Thanks Mike.

Hello everyone.

Please note that some off topic posts have been removed from the thread.

Please also keep in mind that this is an exchange forum, where people share their experiences. So it would be great if you could respect this condition and avoid engaging yourselves in personal attacks and critics.

Thank you for your comprehension.

Regards.

Karen.
Expat.com Team.

Jacksamau I think it sounds like it may be in your best interests to get out of the hotels and into a real place to live if you would like to have a real relationship with this girl (or any Vietnamese girl). Especially since it sounds like it is your intention to relocate here anyways...

I'll admit to a certain amount of naiveté on this subject. Before I came here I did read about the restrictions on sharing a domicile or spending the night with a Vietnamese you are not married to and I asked a couple of Vietnamese people I knew about this and they opined that it was not really enforced. Now it sounds like it may be enforced more than I thought...

In any case I only have about 3 months here so a lot less than you but I can be fairly certain that in the two places I've lived nobody has been keeping tabs on the comings and goings of my visitors. Nobody is showing any ID or registering with any authorities (I am registered where I live of course).

So I think your problem could probably be solved by trading in your hotel room for an apartment.

thanks Nam ..I appreciate this sort of reply. I am not about to go sneaking this lady into a hotel. Believe it or not I'm not even thinking about sex. And thats the point. Sex should just occur naturally. Some advice assumes I want to get her into a room for a quick bang. Geez this lady is a food cook and just a smile is a huge engagement. Glad to hear some posts of late understand more then the obvious conclusions some people jump to.

My sentiments exactly!!

Hi, there is no issue to bring your short or longtime GF to your room as long the hotel is 2/3 Star and she has an ID. ( be carefull about underage girls !!!) My last trip just 4 weeks ago / experience march/ april 14. Just returned from HCMC, VT, and Phu Quoc. My longtime girlfriend is half my age.. Even so no problem. After staying years at Asia.. To me Vietgirls ( south) are the best in Asia. However, total other cultur then thai, cambodia etc. They are taff people.. Never go to a fresh girl bum bum place and at your room .. Log all your staff before u go shower.
Let's hope still most tourist are going to Thailand! 👍😜😜

I really enjoyed just reading your post.

I have never had to pay extra to have a girl in my room. . I wish others would stop this so called paying extra. I even refuse to pay the police when they tried to pull me over on my bike. Last time i sat in the back of the cop truck with my bike for near two hours. They told me to get lost and let me go. At this point they all know me now and laugh and wave as i go bye. We need to stop being a fast buck for these people.

[Moderated: duplicate post]

crazy fuck wrote:

I have never had to pay extra to have a girl in my room. . I wish others would stop this so called paying extra. I even refuse to pay the police when they tried to pull me over on my bike. Last time i sat in the back of the cop truck with my bike for near two hours. They told me to get lost and let me go. At this point they all know me now and laugh and wave as i go bye. We need to stop being a fast buck for these people.

It all depends on the hotel. Try doing that a high-end hotel like the Caravelle or Hilton...not going to happen.  Three stars and under, most of the time you'll be ok. Same with the police, sometimes it's works and sometimes it doesn't. I've seen many a foreigner have their bikes taken for refusing to pay a fine.

crazy fuck wrote:

I have never had to pay extra to have a girl in my room. . I wish others would stop this so called paying extra. I even refuse to pay the police when they tried to pull me over on my bike. Last time i sat in the back of the cop truck with my bike for near two hours. They told me to get lost and let me go. At this point they all know me now and laugh and wave as i go bye. We need to stop being a fast buck for these people.

The cops up here leave me alone, but go complaining to my wife, who has a tendency to add a few things to their complaints, i.e, they told her I'm not allowed my dog on the front of my bike, ( this is reserved for babies, etc without helmets ), he must go in a cage on the back of the bike, but she cunningly added , that I'm supposed to wear a facemask while riding, ( apparently my ugly mug must be scaring the kids? ), she should know that I'm not that gullible, by now.
  The cops used to just stand there and do the usual Statue imitation, when I rode past towing my bike trailer, I thought they were admiring my western style,trailer, until the wife received another complaint, apparently my commune is the only one in VN where bike trailers are banned, ( although you see heaps of the heaps everyday , many old wooden pieces of c*** , tied to the back of the bike with rope, or my favorite, held by the pillion passenger,  ).
Getting back on topic, I stayed with my then girlfriend , at her house, the next day we went to the local Cong An, I thought it was just for me to register, ( the wife's English was practically non existent then ), but after an hours grilling, I found out I had to stay at a hotel from then on, but after a visit from the fat policeman, 1 mil VND was passed under the table, ( but I still had to spend that night in a hotel ), after that I was allowed to stay at her house for a month.

They never climbed into the truck with the bike.

I have lived with my gf for years. The police came to my house only to make a report after I beat  viets. One was drunk and chased his aunt with a knife. The second I beat was a scam artist cheating old ladies out if cash for testing water.the third was my gf dad. He got angry over tet and smashed the window on my guard house. I live in a large what the call villi. I call it a house with yard. Its not where you live. Its who you rent from. My friend asked me what did I do to the local police. For the past two weeks they have been waving to him. I  I.  6

Appreciate for changed username 

crazy fuss wrote:

They never climbed into the truck with the bike.

do you guys think it would be less inconvenient for me to bring girls back to my hotel since im asian?

im an american born chinese/taiwanese (US passport)
im going to be in vietnam (HCMC) for 2 weeks on business
im also quite young... 23 this year

what if i were to go up to my room separately than a girl? would she be stopped in the lobby if reception doesn't recognize her or something?... (4 or 5 star hotel)

also, do any of the hotels in HCMC have underground parking garages? Couldn't i just take the garage elevator with a girl up to my room without them ever seeing?


thanks ahead of time for any input! i had no idea such a rule existed... until a co-worker told me earlier this week

Unless you walk her in they are stopping her.  If she doesn't have an. ID. Card she's not getting in.  If her card is . Photo copy of another girls she's not getting in.  Any good hotel will require this.  And it's for your own protection.  Many girls will rob you blind. I'm married to the same great viet woman for 7 years now.  She's hard working and is very educated.  But if your just want to bang girls do not take them to your hotel room.  Take them to the hour hotel.  Just pick a hotel near yours.  They all have hour rates.  It will cost u less than 5 bucks.  Better than her and her friend emptying your belongings
...  Also don't carry much cash.  Put in hotel safe.  They will sign for the amount.

Probably the best advice ever been given on the subject!  Many very useful little bits here..

I've now heard from two people that the so called " law" that foreigners and Vietnamese cannot cohabitate unless married, has not been in force for 14 years..?
A guy in my building said he has a copy of the new law that allows co habitation.  He said he just handed a copy of that to the police when they wanted their coffee money . 
Apparantly these Police are using an outdated law to their own advantage......unusual Eh.

Luckily for me I prefer to live by myself anyway.

there is no law that says you can't "stay" with your girl friend.  You will find that some more remote areas will give you a hard time about it.  I have been married many years to a VN lady and still no PDA.  I actually find that very respectful of VN woman and like the tradition.  Family law changed recently and you can legally live with a VN woman.  Your best protection against getting harrassed in VN is knowing the rules and respecting the traditions.  Do your homework.