My vietnamese girlfriend cannot stay at my house in vietnam overnight

Omar Salim wrote:

hi bro I am moving to Vietnam soon. so let me get this straight. I am a foreigner and if i meet a girl there who is also a foreigner, in that case.does the police still bother me?

Quick answer: No.

stumpy wrote:

Find one who goes to the same church as you.....

That one was funny    How about my mind is my church? 

MIA2013 wrote:

stumpy wrote:

Find one who goes to the same church as you.....

That one was funny    How about my mind is my church? 

stumpy wrote:

Omar Salim wrote:

hi bro I am moving to Vietnam soon. so let me get this straight. I am a foreigner and if i meet a girl there who is also a foreigner, in that case.does the police still bother me?

Quick answer: No.

you still illegal, my brother and his thai girlfeirnd visit me last year,but the local policeman just allow my brother stay in my house, so i think they will not bother you if you and you friend rent the house together

hELLnoi wrote:

... there is NO excuse for an woman to be in the same room with a man who is not her family. (khalwat).
Open mindedness does not change the rules. Neither are the excuses you stated.
If you have a girl friend, then you can make your own rules or excuse... including marriage after you were accused of close proximity.
In Vietnam, a foreigner CANNOT share a room with a local Vietnamese. That is the LAW which is not flexible.

Many if not most of us don't feel that a woman or a man need to provide any excuses for being in a room together.  However, the law here in Vietnam prohibits a foreign man and a Vietnamese woman sharing a room, which is why it is a matter of discussion. It is a matter of civil law not religious edict.  It appears from the number of hotels renting rooms on an hourly basis that there is no such law prohibiting this among Vietnamese and it is a fairly common practice.  Guess it's better to live in a nanny state than a theocracy.

hELLnoi wrote:

religious grounds!

as significant as coffee grounds

RayG wrote:

hELLnoi wrote:

religious grounds!

as significant as coffee grounds

Or reading teacups.............

jakejas wrote:

That being said, my wife does not dress like a prostitute. If you are doing the same thing with a girl that dresses more promiscuously, I can imagine you might experience more difficulties.

This is absolutely true.

First of all, whether or not it's illegal, a foreign male and foreign female can cohabitate here with no problems at all from the authorities. I and my wife are proof of that. We've lived in several different places before we were married, and traveled all over VN. Never had a problem because of our both having foreign passports.

Now back to the quote above... My wife goes back to China almost every year, for at least one month, to visit her relatives. While she's gone, the security staff at my apartment complex apparently either forgets she ever existed, or assumes she left me. I say this because they appear to act like they don't know who she is when she comes back. On one of her returns to VN, she wanted to surprise me by dressing somewhat provocatively, and when we entered the car-park of our complex, one of the security staff chased us down to tell us she couldn't go in (i.e. he thought she was a prostitute). After looking her over for several seconds while I kept saying "ba xa! ba xa!", he just smiled and walked away.  Of course, my wife, being the astute one that she is, soon asked me just how many prostitutes I had taken home while she was gone. My answer: Obviously none, given that the security staff almost didn't let her in. 

colinoscapee wrote:

It might be time that police remove these very old out of date laws, its basically a money grab and not the rhetoric they spew out.

Not only the law,but also the bureaucracy

Dejavu.dot wrote:

Hi, for 5 start hotel, they will stop her for sure. For example: Sheraton hotel will stop her at the elevator at night while nikko will ask her to fill in a form saying that Nikko will not take responsibility for anything happened insides.

I just know about 5 start hotels, not 4 starts. But I have heard Pullman is quite easier. You can check later. Normally all 5 star hotel will ask you to show your marriage paper or to fill the form like Nikko.

thanks for the info! well i can cross sheraton and nikko off my list haha...
i have a few more quick questions... if you or anyone else doesn't mind helping
-do these hotels only do this type of stuff at night? what about during the day?
-do ALL hotels still require people to show passports? (even if book a room online @ agoda)
-does it not help at all that i also kind of look like the locals? or will the fact that i speak english and not viet automaticaly give it away haha

gosh... why do they have to make it so damn difficult... just wanna have some fun

Dejavu.dot wrote:

Hi,

Sheraton will allow her to come to the room at days while she has to leave at nights but Nikko will stop her from the beginning when you enter the hotel.

The other hotels are quiet easier. It just keeps your passports. For Vietnamese, it will keep their ids. My friend stayed in boss 3 last time and he told me his gf can stay with him whole night.

Don't make fun. Be serious and take responsibility for whom you take to the bed!

Regards

Haha but I don't wanna make a serious girlfriend on a business trip... 

I've read about the passport thing... whats the purpose of it? Can they use that info to call the cops on me or something?... Can i just ask them to make a photocopy and let me keep my original passport?

My company is paying for my hotel so I don't think I can tell them to book me at a 2 star hotel like Boss 3 without them figuring out why hahaha. I think it has to be somewhat decent for them to not question my intentions.

ALSO, is there a way of finding out each hotel's policy? Do I have to call them or can I email them? (If so... what do i say? "Hi, can I have guests over in my room?" )

Dejavu.dot wrote:

Hi, for 5 start hotel, they will stop her for sure...

Not for sure. I have walked into hotels with my VN wife (without verification of marriage) many times without anyone batting an eye. Some of them were very nice hotels, although none of the hotels were in Saigon, and my wife usually dresses conservatively.

tml wrote:

Dejavu.dot wrote:

Hi,

Sheraton will allow her to come to the room at days while she has to leave at nights but Nikko will stop her from the beginning when you enter the hotel.

The other hotels are quiet easier. It just keeps your passports. For Vietnamese, it will keep their ids. My friend stayed in boss 3 last time and he told me his gf can stay with him whole night.

Don't make fun. Be serious and take responsibility for whom you take to the bed!

Regards

Haha but I don't wanna make a serious girlfriend on a business trip... 

I've read about the passport thing... whats the purpose of it? Can they use that info to call the cops on me or something?... Can i just ask them to make a photocopy and let me keep my original passport?

My company is paying for my hotel so I don't think I can tell them to book me at a 2 star hotel like Boss 3 without them figuring out why hahaha. I think it has to be somewhat decent for them to not question my intentions.

ALSO, is there a way of finding out each hotel's policy? Do I have to call them or can I email them? (If so... what do i say? "Hi, can I have guests over in my room?" )

Being a lady, I cant support what you will do.  But be frank with them. There are many Viet girls who have good imaginary for long-term relationships.

Maybe you can choose to live in 5 star apartments. It can allow people to stay. I am afraid that you will have to call them to confirm the information.

http://www.sherwoodresidence.com/en/inquiryhttp://www.agoda.com/saigon-domaine-lux … amp;cklg=1

Regards

Dejavu.dot wrote:

tml wrote:

Dejavu.dot wrote:

Hi,

Sheraton will allow her to come to the room at days while she has to leave at nights but Nikko will stop her from the beginning when you enter the hotel.

The other hotels are quiet easier. It just keeps your passports. For Vietnamese, it will keep their ids. My friend stayed in boss 3 last time and he told me his gf can stay with him whole night.

Don't make fun. Be serious and take responsibility for whom you take to the bed!

Regards

Haha but I don't wanna make a serious girlfriend on a business trip... 

I've read about the passport thing... whats the purpose of it? Can they use that info to call the cops on me or something?... Can i just ask them to make a photocopy and let me keep my original passport?

My company is paying for my hotel so I don't think I can tell them to book me at a 2 star hotel like Boss 3 without them figuring out why hahaha. I think it has to be somewhat decent for them to not question my intentions.

ALSO, is there a way of finding out each hotel's policy? Do I have to call them or can I email them? (If so... what do i say? "Hi, can I have guests over in my room?" )

Being a lady, I cant support what you will do.  But be frank with them. There are many Viet girls who have good imaginary for long-term relationships.

Maybe you can choose to live in 5 star apartments. It can allow people to stay. I am afraid that you will have to call them to confirm the information.

http://www.sherwoodresidence.com/en/inquiryhttp://www.agoda.com/saigon-domaine-lux … amp;cklg=1

Regards

thanks again for the help.
I understand your perspective. But in my own defense... I'm not as bad of a monster i'm making myself appear 
But I'm glad you said what you said. I appreciate the reminder. I am always very good about making my intentions very clear. Having a chinese/taiwanese background, I can safely say that a lot of chinese girls feel the same way about hoping for long term relationships.