Hi Paul,
We moved here from the UK with our two children 5 years ago so hopefully I can offer some advice. Most houses come furnished although getting unfurnished is possible just not the norm. Unless you are attached to the furniture I would leave it at home. Shipping costs varies but we just phoned around a few companies in the UK and got the best quote. Either way it wasn't cheap so be careful what you bring. Certainly bring all the kids toys and games you can. The quality of what you can buy here is limited although we now have a Toyrus so things are improving.
We did think about shipping our car too but were advised against it and I am glad we didn't. Getting it changed over to be registered here is likely to be a headache. There are a lot of second hand cars here and it is often easy enough to find one that has been expat owned or you can get one fairly new and being sold due to the owner not keeping up repayments. Alternatively if you think you are going to be here for a few years buy a new one. This might seem crazy but they tent to hold their value and the bank loans have low interest rates so if you can pay it back reasonably quickly it's very affordable and you get piece of mind
Schools, there are two major international schools. ISB and Jerudong International School. Both are good although I beleive JIS is slightly more expensive.
Location, probably in the Bandar/ Muara end of Brunei. You can live down in Kuala Belait but some might argue that there is slightly less to do. In Brunei you are always near the beach and a jungle and parks are common but are less usable than in the UK. It gets very hot and there is almost no shade in the parks.
Feel free to mail me back if you want to know more
Neale
