Understanding Vietnamese girls

Crikey, Stone the Flamin' Crows, is this thread fair dinkum?

Its enough to make an Onion cry

How much can a Koala Bear?

As usual so well put. Yeah, I agree his bias toward men and that women had these faults bred into them was a bit over the top. It is a difficult, bumpy two way street for both men and women.
I wish I could set and write such we thought out things as ciambella or even the tenavity to QC what I throw at the wall. The lady with the golden  tongue

mikeymac wrote:

Crikey, Stone the Flamin' Crows, is this thread fair dinkum?

"If you fly with the crows, you get shot with the crows"   - Bjelke Peterson

    ..for the rest of us mere males, it's a bit like walking both sides of a barbed-wire fence...

    But (Si', am Bella)  covers it compleatly...       (Siam Bella?)

    ( Yes, the cryptographers decoded her icon )     

       ..our doubts remain, but...     

Ciambella - Many thanks for your well considered reply. You've made several very good points and I appreciate your not rejecting it offhand because of the somewhat sexist stance of the author. While I don't think the differences are encoded at a genetic level, I do think the difference exists at an structural or coding level of the brain. I have an idea of how to describe that but it will take a while to develop the idea.
It's interesting to consider just where and how those differences manifest themselves at the genetic level, but I digress.
Many thanks for your well considered and well developed and tolerant reply.
Much more later.

My father told me when I was a young lad,
"Son, the man who understands women is yet to be born.....and his mother and father are dead."

On a whim I just Googled quantum computing brain and found that it's a very hot research topic of late. It's been found that mathematicians can prove concepts that are impossible to do with state-of-the-art computer architecture. That also has implications for savant capabilities. The brain may very well be quantum mechanical in nature and its very chemical structure may be responsible for its behavior. The genes may very well be responsible for how it processes data, just as holograms do in some present quantum computers.
Pardon my rant.

Bazza139 wrote:

But (Si', am Bella)  covers it compleatly...       (Siam Bella?)

    ( Yes, the cryptographers decoded her icon )     

       ..our doubts remain, but...

No mystery, Bazza. 

Ciambella is Italian for doughnut, or any ring-shaped cake.  Spouse used to have a big sweet tooth.  During the years we lived in Italy, ciambella was one of his favourite sweets to order at the bars in the late afternoons.  I've been using the same handle for almost two decades, too comfortable to change.

THIGV wrote:

I think he had a go-pro mounted on a stolen grocery cart. 

At first I thought it was a walker he held onto with his left hand while walking around, but now that you mentioned it, grocery cart is a better bet.

Ciambella wrote:

Bazza139 wrote:

But (Si', am Bella)  covers it compleatly...       (Siam Bella?)

    ( Yes, the cryptographers decoded her icon )     

       ..our doubts remain, but...

No mystery, Bazza. 

"  Spouse used to have a big sweet tooth"

..AND YOU CURED HIM..???
WaW!!   (What a Woman!!)     

Can't take the credit for that.  He still eats sweets, but much, much, much less often.  Two heart attacks were a good incentive for curbing bad habits.

Congratulations on 1,000 posts Ciambella.  Your input on this forum is so valuable.  While i am new here and read a lot of new and old threads without posting a lot I always read yours carefully as you have great insight and experience.

This has been one of my favorite threads since I'm moving to Vietnam permanently in February.  I do have a Vietnamese fiance and will be marrying in April, one year after we first met.  I've been coming for a couple of weeks every two months and it's time to make the move.

My opinion and limited experience is that Vietnamese girls want you to be a bit aggressive. Or at least to take the lead. If you like her, then go for it. What have you got to lose? Don't be afraid. Get on Facebook, get on Instagram too, and ask for her profile. Let her know you like her.
I agree about the money part. Don't give her any. Or don't give her much anyways. And it's probably good that she is the no sex before marriage type, but don't let that hold you back. Maybe she changes her mind when she gets to know you..

Men want sex; women want security

            Biology works in every culture       

SteinNebraska wrote:

I do have a Vietnamese fiance and will be marrying in April, one year after we first met.  I've been coming for a couple of weeks every two months and it's time to make the move.

Thank you for the compliments. 

Whatever the future brings to your upcoming marriage, I hope you'll maintain the right mindset to make the absolute most out of what you're given, and in case the givings fail to make you happy, I hope you'll not be discouraged, but will be able to find the way to alter the outcome.

Hello everyone,

Just to inform you that I have removed a couple of off-topic posts from this thread.

Thank you

Diksha
Team Expat.com

Diksha wrote:

Hello everyone,

Just to inform you that I have removed a couple of off-topic posts from this thread.

Thank you

Diksha
Team Expat.com

Does that mean I don't get 'karma' credit for the three regular posters who 'liked' what I said?

But how am I going to Understand Vietnamese Girls?
Now, I will add that 'girls" in my mind are  in their teens or less or thereabouts.
As in "school girls" as opposed to "women at work."
So I assume the real question is, Understanding Vietnamese Women.

But then it occurs to me, that probably the same people who don't understand Vietnamese woman, probably don't understand Vietnamese culture or society?

And from what I have seen, Vietnamese women are not that much different than almost all the rest of the woman in the world.

So, maybe the whole question started because the OP didn't understand anything about anything.

.

Wxx3 wrote:

But how am I going to Understand Vietnamese Girls?
Now, I will add that 'girls" in my mind are  in their teens or less or thereabouts.
As in "school girls" as opposed to "women at work."
So I assume the real question is, Understanding Vietnamese Women.

But then it occurs to me, that probably the same people who don't understand Vietnamese woman, probably don't understand Vietnamese culture or society?

And from what I have seen, Vietnamese women are not that much different than almost all the rest of the woman in the world.

So, maybe the whole question started because the OP didn't understand anything about anything.

.
            "Deep Thought"  would be proud of you..!!!     ( - HHGTTG )

      ..at least you do understand the question....       

.

You should be embarrassed to post such voluminous drivel in public .

Wxx3 wrote:

But how am I going to Understand Vietnamese Girls?

And from what I have seen, Vietnamese women are not that much different than almost all the rest of the woman in the world.

Sorry mate, I have to respectfully disagree with you there.  I don't have time to elaborate, but I have lived in the west, east and south america and can tell you there are differences as culture does impact how they react to certain situations and how they approach life.  Yes, they are all women, they have some common traits, but they are different, in my opinion.  Like someone else said, even language has an impact on behavior and I agree.  I speak, read and write Spanish fluently and yes, when I am speaking Spanish and especially when I am in latin america, it impacts how I behave, think and react.  I speak a little Vietnamese and it is the same.  My VN wife is not the only long term relationship that I have experienced.  But rest assured, she is very different from the others in many ways.   Her way of thinking, approaching and addressing issues in everyday life is different.

Yes, I am spoiled, I admit it.  But it is not my fault.  My VN wife made me this way, fit to be the King, but I can't stop her nor can I because she makes me absolutely crazy for her. 

zob24 wrote:

You should be embarrassed to post such voluminous drivel in public .

zob24 wrote:

You should be embarrassed to post such voluminous drivel in public .

If you are going to attack in an ad hominem mode, at least be kind enough to do it just once.   

vndreamer wrote:

Wxx3 wrote:

But how am I going to Understand Vietnamese Girls?

And from what I have seen, Vietnamese women are not that much different than almost all the rest of the woman in the world.

Sorry mate, I have to respectfully disagree with you there.  I don't have time to elaborate, but I have lived in the west, east and south america and can tell you there are differences as culture does impact how they react to certain situations and how they approach life.  Yes, they are all women, they have some common traits, but they are different, in my opinion.  Like someone else said, even language has an impact on behavior and I agree.  I speak, read and write Spanish fluently and yes, when I am speaking Spanish and especially when I am in latin america, it impacts how I behave, think and react.  I speak a little Vietnamese and it is the same.  My VN wife is not the only long term relationship that I have experienced.  But rest assured, she is very different from the others in many ways.   Her way of thinking, approaching and addressing issues in everyday life is different.

Yes, I am spoiled, I admit it.  But it is not my fault.  My VN wife made me this way, fit to be the King, but I can't stop her nor can I because she makes me absolutely crazy for her. 

Read my entire post.
I think you missed, "But then it occurs to me, that probably the same people who don't understand Vietnamese woman, probably don't understand Vietnamese culture or society?"

Wxx3 wrote:

Read my entire post.
I think you missed, "But then it occurs to me, that probably the same people who don't understand Vietnamese woman, probably don't understand Vietnamese culture or society?"

Well which is it?  It appears you are contradicting yourself?

vndreamer wrote:

Wxx3 wrote:

Read my entire post.
I think you missed, "But then it occurs to me, that probably the same people who don't understand Vietnamese woman, probably don't understand Vietnamese culture or society?"

Well which is it?  It appears you are contradicting yourself?

Not at all. They are not mutually exclusive. And i even agree with you!

But don't women the world over want the same thing: security, to be protected, to be liked if not loved, not to be abused, beaten, sold, to be able to raise a family without too much worry?

From place to place, what security means may change, but it's still security in their mind.
That's what I mean by being the same, but the culture is different.

So, you and I see a "different" woman, but is it really?

I just came back from Italy, from friends I've known for 40 years. There was a woman there who loved me very much , but she was 21 and I was 32. I thought too big an age difference (ironic, I know) but more than that, Italians really like to be near family. She still lives with 10 mi of where she was born, but I never gave her the choice.
I've apologized for that over the years.

I was too immature to love her the way she needed me and didn't appreciate/understand her wanting to take care of me. 
As I think about it, my Vietnamese GF is the same. What's changed is me. I've grown up and after 60 years, i can now appreciate a woman like that.


I

Wxx3 wrote:

What's changed is me. I've grown up and after 60 years, I can now appreciate a woman like that.
I

We do change, don't we?
The Only Thing That Is Constant Is Change.

Jim-Minh wrote:

Wxx3 wrote:

What's changed is me. I've grown up and after 60 years, I can now appreciate a woman like that.
I

We do change, don't we?
The Only Thing That Is Constant Is Change.

Do you have some to spare???

Jim-Minh wrote:

The Only Thing That Is Constant Is Change.

OceanBeach92107 wrote:

Do you have some to spare???

If you do, I'll gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today.   

Ciambella wrote:

Jim-Minh wrote:

The Only Thing That Is Constant Is Change.

OceanBeach92107 wrote:

Do you have some to spare???

If you do, I'll gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today.   

Your posts are usually very strong.

That one was kind of Wimpy...

.

OceanBeach92107 wrote:

Ciambella wrote:

Jim-Minh wrote:

The Only Thing That Is Constant Is Change.

OceanBeach92107 wrote:

Do you have some to spare???

If you do, I'll gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today.   

Your posts are usually very strong.

That one was kind of Wimpy...

.
    Relax, Ciambella...

    My (sad) attempts at humour also fail before those who cannot connect-the-dots

     Never mind, ignorance is bliss; until reality bites...     

            ..also known as change..?     

          Ignoring ignorance brings its own cure...:     

Bazza139 wrote:

.

OceanBeach92107 wrote:

Ciambella wrote:

If you do, I'll gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today.   

Your posts are usually very strong.

That one was kind of Wimpy...

.
    Relax, Ciambella...

    My (sad) attempts at humour also fail before those who cannot connect-the-dots

     Never mind, ignorance is bliss; until reality bites...     

            ..also known as change..?     

          Ignoring ignorance brings its own cure...:     

Bazza,

You are so cute when you are being protective.

This is "Wimpy"...



Just connecting the dots for YOU...

.

Ok, so where did you get that pikcha off me..?     

    ..it's not even my good side...

      (and my burgers are bigger)    So there!!     

      ..but getting back to the 'change'  @ Wxx3 has experienced..?

       Lessee, 30 years to mature(?)  ..then another 30 to appreciate..?     

       ..I trust you won't mind if we don't wait for the next epiphany..?     
.

OceanBeach92107 wrote:

Your posts are usually very strong.

That one was kind of Wimpy...

Pretty clever retort, OB. 

Bazza139 wrote:

.

    Relax, Ciambella...

Thank you, Bazza.   

If England and America are two countries separated by the same language, J. Wellington Wimpy, Popeye's only failed attempt on a good deed, definitely was one of the characters who separated the two cultures.

.

Ciambella wrote:

OceanBeach92107 wrote:

Your posts are usually very strong.

That one was kind of Wimpy...

Pretty clever retort, OB. 

Bazza139 wrote:

.

    Relax, Ciambella...

Thank you, Bazza.   

If England and America are two countries separated by the same language, J. Wellington Wimpy, Popeye's only failed attempt on a good deed, definitely was one of the characters who separated the two cultures.

.
     Thank you (my Bella), but I think I am to blame for using Popeye's
      "I am what I yam"   on another topic..?      ..whatever...

    He remains my Hero for protecting Olive...   ..and you..?

        ..will remain my Heroine...     
.

Bazza139 wrote:

.

Ciambella wrote:

OceanBeach92107 wrote:

Your posts are usually very strong.

That one was kind of Wimpy...

Pretty clever retort, OB. 

Bazza139 wrote:

.

    Relax, Ciambella...

Thank you, Bazza.   

If England and America are two countries separated by the same language, J. Wellington Wimpy, Popeye's only failed attempt on a good deed, definitely was one of the characters who separated the two cultures.

.
     Thank you (my Bella), but I think I am to blame for using Popeye's
      "I am what I yam"   on another topic..?      ..whatever...

    He remains my Hero for protecting Olive...   ..and you..?

        ..will remain my Heroine...     
.

You can't say Heroin in the forum...

Just want to say I really love reading all of your posts.  All of you are the best and hope someday we can schedule a get together.  Just imagine the fun.

Back on topic - wife told me this morning;

"women love from the ear and men love from the eye"   

Today I was with my wife in an international maternity clinic.
We had to wait a long time because we were not registered.

Then a caucasian (probably American) came with his pregnant vietnamese girlfriend or wife. He had all hat and no cattle and spoke very loudly, so that really everyone was paying attention to him. The woman was very embarrassed and had always instructed him to hold back.

When the woman registered and told him that the examination cost 500k he freaked out and said that he didn't spend 500k for it. The woman was now very annoyed and both left the clinic without an examination.

This is a typical example as I have often seen it here in Vietnam.

Exactly such guys curse the Vietnamese women here in the forum because they left them and now they have to pay for their wife and children.  But they would never think that they are just idiots and that they are to blame for the whole misery.

These guys have the feeling that they are the best and that they are irresistible and thinking they can treat their wives or girlfriends like filth. And then they are surprised if the woman is looking for a real man who can take care of her and the children.

For me such idiots are a blessing.
Because every time we see such a guy my wife tells me how glad she is to found such a good husband like me. 

vndreamer wrote:

Just want to say I really love reading all of your posts.  All of you are the best and hope someday we can schedule a get together.  Just imagine the fun.

Back on topic - wife told me this morning;

"women love from the ear and men love from the eye"   

I was expecting something quite worse than the eyes 

Andy Passenger wrote:

These guys have the feeling that they are the best and that they are irresistible and thinking they can treat their wives or girlfriends like filth. And then they are surprised if the woman is looking for a real man who can take care of her and the children.

I'm irresistible with my cute South Vietnamese accent but I treat my women very well 

PS: I mean, how cute is that, farming pineapples deep in the countryside of Rach Gia?

That is cool. Good for you.