You've lived in Singapore, Moscow, and London. What do you like the most about each city?
Yes, I lived about three years in each city during the 1990s. I loved Singapore for its safety and ease of doing business as well as its great airport and central location for traveling to the rest of Asia Pacific. In Russia, I loved the rich sense of history (even though much of it was brutal) and unique architecture. As for the UK, there was little I didn't love. I loved the architecture, the business climate, the cultural opportunities, the ease of getting away for the weekend — I even loved the weather — everything but the transportation system and the high cost of living.
What would you say to the women, who don't dare to grab an opportunity abroad? Either because they fear that the move will shake their family, or that they won't be able to survive away from family and friends, or they are just too settled, and aren't willing to take risks.
My response is simple: Just go for it! Unless what you already have is truly your dream job and life, then you should keep striving and growing. Indeed, I would argue that even if you do have your current dream job/life, you should never stop striving and growing. But I get that growth and change is not comfortable or easy — that's why so many people stall and stagnate. But my view is that life is not a spectator sport. And you can't win if you don't even play! So get in there. Even if you fail, you will have learned so much, I'm willing to bet it'll still pay off in the long run.
How does your family and child cope with your frequent travels?
Since I had already worked in about 50 countries by the time I had a family, my priorities had shifted and I no longer desired to extend professional travel by adding personal time to overseas trips, which I had done frequently in my younger years. So I'd often go to Europe from NYC or Chicago for just a day. That way, my family barely noticed I was gone. When my daughter was little and I had to be gone for a week or more, I often took them with me (on my own dime of course). A key to success for every professional is picking the right spouse. My spouse is an avid traveler and had agreed to stay home after our now 12-year-old was born, so he was happy to go along. In that way, we converted work travel into family memories.
You are the co-author of the award-winning book Go Ahead by Going Abroad. What has been inspiring you all these years to go ahead in life?
For better and worse, I was born into a highly competitive family. We competed on everything from accolades to airtime, often without even realizing we were doing it. So, the truth is that my early drive came mostly from insecurity and a need to win — to prove something to myself and others. But the more I achieved, the more my motivation became about helping others and making a positive difference for the organizations I was working for. And that's a much happier place to be coming from.
How did the idea for this book come up? Can you tell us a few benefits of living abroad?
The benefits of working and living abroad are numerous — both personal and professional. Faster promotions, greater responsibility, more money, as well as exciting travel, adventure, and constant growth are all likely. The idea for the book came when I had my daughter. I thought I might stay home with her, so I wanted to find another way to make a difference for others and to show her that while I might just be her “everyday mom”, I had previously followed my dreams and done all sorts of things people said I (or any young woman) never could. So the book was to inspire both her and other women.
Who are more keen on expat life — men or women?
Men have traditionally been much more likely to go overseas for sure but I'm not sure I'd say they are more keen overall. As more and more women experience the excitement and opportunity of living overseas, I think they are becoming equally — if not more keen than men. So, I think it really depends on the person and their life stage.
What are some serious challenges that expat women often have to face?
General physical safety. Unwanted sexual advances. Restricted freedom of movement. Emotional abuse. Discrimination. You name it, women can face them all. And that's tough. But these are not necessarily unique to overseas assignments. So, I'd say do your homework, and think about your own personal needs and wants but, don't write off being an expat just because you may face some serious challenges. All the most meaningful things you do in life involve challenges — just think about being a parent!
From the countries you have worked and lived in, which are friendlier to expat women?
There are both obvious and less obvious things that can make life and work difficult for expat women. Laws and customs that discriminate against females are obvious. But in my experience, some of the markets that are on the surface women-friendly (like the Western European) can in reality be quite discriminatory. Whereas other markets (like Asian markets) where people assume it's very hard to succeed as a woman, can actually be very manageable. But of course like so many things, it often really depends on the individual, the role, and the organization how challenging it'll be to be a woman.
Are millennials less career oriented, and are they looking more for a personal meaning in life? Does this make them better travelers?
I don't believe millennials are less career oriented. I just think their priorities are different. And I suspect this makes them even better travelers and expats.
As a mother who values global mindset and life abroad, how can you instill global thinking in a child?
Like everything else about parenting, it's not just about what you say, it's about what you do. My kids both have global mindsets because we are by marriage a multi-national family, we observe multi-national holidays and traditions, we travel overseas frequently, and our friends are from every race, nationality, ethnicity. In this way, having a global mindset is just natural for my kids. They don't even have to think about it. It's the only way they know.
If you had to live in any other country but the US, which country would that be?
There are so many places I'd love to live. But the places my husband and I discuss most frequently moving to in the coming years are the UK and Denmark — the UK because of everything I said earlier and the sailing for my husband; Denmark because my husband is Danish, Copenhagen is a wonderful, welcoming international city, and of course we have so many family members there. So, if anybody has a job for me in one of those locations, let me know! I love what I do now, but I'd also love to work overseas again before my daughter graduates from high school.
