I am totally confused and I need help on this one

Hi elinabio,

I just discussed the question with a friend who is teacher at a private school.

A boy born Nov. 1997 should be in form 5 so he is already 1 form lower than he should be , probably to start the exam syllabus for next year and give him the advantage as a foreign kid.

The kid is already one year older than class mates , another year down would put a 15 year old who is nearly 16 with 13 year olds. No school is going to do that , not even private schools.

Two questions remain. How good does the boy speak English and/or Maltese and are you planning on staying in Malta permanently. ?

Cheers
Ricky

hi ricky,

and thanks for the reply.

I don't know about staying permanently in Malta. moving there wasn't a considered decision. my husband suddenly received a job proposal he said he can't refuse. the only thing I knew about Malta before that was it is an island. so we might like it and stay or we might not and decide to leave after a year or two, who knows. of course this uncertainty is not good for the kids.

my boy is still in his Bulgarian school. his English is pretty decent. he didn't have any problem with his last years language exams, which were for B2 (according to European language levels). as for Maltese - he knows none.

obviously I didn't understand much while reading about Maltese education system. I thought 4th form is the last one in a secondary school... and I supposed being 15 he should be in 3rd form. I completely agree that putting a 15 years old in a class of 13 years old is not a good idea at all.
I'll continue reading and also I'll think again about leaving him in Sofia with his grandparents so he can finish this school year. although I really don't like that option. I suspect he'll drive his grandparents crazy pretty soon

HI ELINABIO--
As we say in America, "you have a lot on your plate right now."  In a way I can understand how scary that must be for you as a wife and a mother.  I also moved to a foreign country with a child once.  I also worried about his education and his emotional stability and if moving to a totally new place would hurt him. 
Here are a couple things to look at.  Your son will manage no matter what you decide to do because he has a strong family that loves him.  He is also young, adaptable and resilient and this could be a very positive experience for him if you present it to him that way.  I am sure he already admires the courage he sees in his parents for looking at an opportunity that sound like a good thing for all. 
Yes, it is important to have a good education, but part of that education is learning to explore the world around him and experiencing all that life has to offer.  Maybe right now that is a more important lesson than what his school books can teach.  He will manage and his education will be much richer for the experience no matter what that is.  Give him some credit for that.  And while you are at it, give yourself a pat on the back, it takes a lot of courage to do what you are doing!!  Good Luck and keep me posted how you are doing.

Hi Elinabio,

Just to mention, as a factor in your decision making, here in Malta its a common practice to introduce up to 6 months probation period, where employers can assess you and you can assess the company. Within this period, the job is not yet secured, and it is rather risky to base your whole moving decision on just an offer of employment, especially if it envolves for your son to be changing schools and be potentially at disadvantage. Have you considered giving it a try period to see how it goes with the job and how you would like the country? Also, doesn't your husband require a work permit being a Bulgarian national? That could make things a lot more complicated.

Good luck on your decision,

Irina

It is not an easy situation. Both I and several of my friends and former coworkers have been in your shoes when we decided to move for the sake of career in a time that was inopportune for our kids' education. The most frequent choice was to let the kid, who is soon to finish school, stay in the home country either with a relative or in a boarding school, or a combination thereof. Of course we would  bring her in to the new country for every vacation, every holiday - and ourselves visited the child as often as it was possible, as we feared that moving the child might negatively affect his/her grades and  thus his/her further educational opportunities. ( if for example he/she weren't able to enter a renowned university due to lower than expected grades and had to attend a run of the mill college, which would then hamper his/her career choices).

thank you guys for the support and different points of view given. this helped a lot.

I think I managed to find a solution and I hope I won't regret it. our son can start from January in Form 4 in a private school. the head of the school was very helpful. what I liked most in the correspondence we had is he never tried to promise things that do not depend on him entirely.
hopefully the boy will take the SEC/O exams seriously and will study hard for them. he is smart enough to do it if he wish.

@Mrellan - thanks a lot for the encouragement. I needed it for sure

@IrinaC - thank you for mentioning the probation period and the work permit. all this is part of the equation already and there is a backup plan in place.
my husband is in Malta for some time now. he is working already. what is left is the work permit as it is not something given in a hurry. he was told though that for highly qualified IT jobs and salary above the average for the sector the work permit is a formality. is it possible this is not true?

@Minerva909 - oh, yes, the sake of career… I know exactly what you are talking about. what a mess decisions based on this usually create…
anyway there are more than 3 years before our son finishes high school, which is too much in my opinion. if we leave him at Sofia we will be complete strangers after a while no matter if he spends with us every vacation or not. I don't want this to happen. it's hard enough that we have to leave in Sofia our daughter. but she is 18 already and is in the last grade in high school. so there are no other options for her.

Hi elinabio,

I'm glad you worked things out with the school.

it is probably true that for highly qualified jobs in IT with above average salary the work permit is a formality but ..

only if the employer cannot fill the position with somebody from Malta or the EU.

And with the ETC you never know !

I'm surprised your husband is already working ...without a work permit !

Well, anyway, I hope things go well.

Cheers
Ricky