Living in DR is not for everyone!

I agree polo1club. My philosophy is that happiness doesn't just happen. It is constant work. Find the many little things that make you laugh, amuse you, or entertain you every day. Hang on to them. It is the many small things that all add up to a happy life, not one or two large events. For the negative things, acknowledge them, deal with them, but don't carry them with you. That baggage will weigh you down and make you miserable. Being happy or having a positive outlook is very hard work, you have to look for the good things in life. The pretty insect, the lizard that surprised you, the rainbows, the almost ever-present sunshine, a stranger that helped you without question. Once you start looking, you find more and more good all the time. But, look for the bad, or focus on it, and you'll find it easily. Look where you want to go. Good advice for driving and life.

Well said guys. I agree 100%

I agree,if they don't like it it's always way back to the places  from where they come.

I believe that ALL places haves pros and cons. And yes, we need to focus on the good part of it and always keep it in a respectiful way. Hateful speach cannot be tolerated. People pointing out issues in order to find solutions and alternatives or at least to understanding why the culture is this or that way, should be accepted and that's why people join forums like this, to understand the place better, to grab some hints and also to built a comunity. If people pointing out problems with the place in order to get help or understanding bothers one so much, this also creates a bad environment where people just gets reprehended for asking for help or sharing experiences.

I wholeheartedly agree with polo1cub & UncleBuck! DR is a beautiful country AND when you take the time to consider cultural nuances and traditions you'll be able to appreciate the beauty of the people.

Joao, asking questions to better understand the culture or asking for help in order to address a concern is not an issue. I don't believe anyone would fault that. Taking a bad interaction and generalizing it to speak down on an entire country and culture of people is something entirely different. In my opinion, that is what is being addressed in this particular thread.

As a young, single, female who has been here for over 2 years, I've learned that using wisdom in interactions is key to a positive experience anywhere you go. That being said, NO place on earth is perfect and whatever you fixate on is what will dominate your experience.

Lots of great comments here!  There is  good and bad everywhere!  Being able to discuss them in a respectful way is critical.

As long as the good outweighs the bad,  it works!  When that reverses then it's time to look at why you are here!

It's not for everyone. And that isn't a judgement. It's a simple statement of fact.  It's all personal, what works for you may not work for me.  Please do what works for you!

And hateful speech will NEVER be tolerated!  If you see it, report it!

@Siobhan222

Very well said!you took the words right out of my mouth;)

I agree with most of it, but being forced into silence out of fear of discussion is not the answer either. I would expect to come to a forum like this to be WARNED of the many pitfalls to protect others. We all know that the DR can be a very convoluted and backwards in many things. To ask us to sit in silence and not bring these things up no matter how it sounds is just as counter productive. Lastly this expat shaming language (Go Back home) has a hint of racism to it. Also the majority of us (at least Americans) we discuss and critiqued the ills in even our own home countries as that's the only way you can expect change is by calling out and challenging the norms.

I am not for any disrespect or bashing but many of us paid in the multiple hundreds of thousands of dollars to buy homes in the country and these posts are sounding like suck up the substandard conditions and don't expect any better! I don't recall seeing any of that in the DR tourism brochures nor from any of the realtors begging and pleading for FOREIGN investment dollars.

Please let me know if I am missing a memo from somewhere

Yes, "polo" I believe your observations are quite true but I feel like its a sign of the times.  There are many things happening in the DR that are straining our lives here.  Every day seems just a little bit tougher.  We vent, we look for solutions but honestly it doesn't matter "where" we are, we would do the same venting, finding of solutions etc. some place else. I believe that similar issues are happening world wide.  We can only do our best and with the help of this forum, our friends and family we try to find ways to improve the bad situations.  Change is inevitable and we have little control over it.  Let's all work together to help each other through these changing times.

Good post!

You are not missing the memo Rico and no disrespect is intended but looking at some of the writing it comes off as unhappy and bashing DR, which is freedom of speech and all is well with that but all I am saying is you have chosen ( not you but those who complaint) to live there and they make it sound so bad, so if its that bad I would perhaps seek a change to a place where you are happy and all is perfect. The complaints are things that are happening in every country not just DR but they make it seem like its only there. To me if you chose to be somewhere then you try to make the best of it and complaining and bashing will not get you on the right track to happiness. this is one man's opinion on here, some  can see it differently. You are right people come here for inside helpful information not to be scared out of moving here which is how it comes across at time. One bad experience does not make a lifetime. There will be ups and downs living in DR. Seek what works for you and enjoy the paradise!

ricomozo, I think you also make a very good point.  Many of us have made the DR our home and have spent our life's savings to be here.  If you don't like it go back home is not the answer... although I do understand the intent.  This is an expat forum.  The intent is to help fellow expats and those that want to be expats, adjust, overcome and learn the ways of the DR.  Hopefully we can bring a little civilization with us.  I am sure that there is not one Dominican refusing the money expats have brought to this country.  We are all just trying to get along...

@polo1club Thank you for pointing this out.  I am moving to the DR in May and have done extensive research and visited in November. Seeing all the negative comments in different forums have been quite jarring because my thought was always, "well, if you don't like it, why live there?"  I think people need to gain some perspective and realize it is always what you make it. 

I think it's more about how it's done rather than it being done.

We all have the need to speak the truth and read about it.  It needs to be done respectfully and without generalizing and bashing. That is hard to do when you are in the middle of it!

I think everyone just needs to be a bit kinder!  Maybe a seconds thought as we vent and complain?

I have said this many times, sadly almost everyone will complain but very few talk about the good stuff.  I hope this forum has more balance than many other sites and social media!

We all need to change our frame of mind! os not our culture, our food etc.

Being Mexican American for 46 years it is a change even for.me lol.

my wife lived in the USA for 8 years and she finds it strange how people are lol.(go figure) she is domimican.

Enjoy and embrace the country  as it is, if not go home as simple as that.

As pointed out, it's not always that simple. 

Kindness. Leave judgement behind. Manage your life as best you can!

Question for all you complainers....have you ever heard about mass shootings in the DR? Kids being killed in their classrooms, a place that should be safe? Friends and family enjoying a concert when shots fire? Running a marathon when a bomb goes off?

What I'm trying to say is that even the "greatest" countries have their problems. I am American and it kills me every day to hear those stories. It also scares me every day to hear those stories. Unfortunately, nowhere is safe and we have to learn how to deal with it!

I have lived in DR for 9 months now and I am not going to say it is perfect but I enjoy living here. It is a different way of living and we have to adapt. There are issues, sure, and I don't mind people talking about them on here. But I wholeheartetly agree with the start of this post in that some people are just HARSH on here! I have read some of them to my husband, who is Dominican and it is incredibly disrespectful. Especially the ones that say "everyone" is like that. NO, they are not. There are bad people here, but there are bad people everywhere! (Hence the start of this post)

totally agree! i think we should just put this issue to rest, we all know why we are here and as many have said, we need to adapt period.

enjoy life and the beauty of this country.

@ricomozo My thoughts exactly.  If I said Go back home in Canada I'd be called racist period

Ok this had about run its course!

Great post @polo!

The generalizations are the things that bother me. I certainly don't want to be judged by the behavior of all Americans, because there are plenty of them that embarrass or scare the hell out of me on a daily basis!

I believe that those who choose to move here AFTER doing their research, spending time here outside resorts, and getting to know the area they plan to live in are the ones who are able to live here most successfully! In my experience, it's the ones who buy homes here on a whim or move here after a single visit or are escaping something/someone in their home country that have the most issues. The DR is a beautiful country, full of plenty of good people, with a lot to offer to those who can adapt. You don't have to love everything about living here, you just have to accept it! Or you can become a citizen with the right to vote and protest and try to make changes!

I think the key word is  - adaptability!

People who are in doubt should get out and plan another road map to their future somewhere else ….. I don't know what yer (they) were expecting when they arrived here …. Maybe an imaginary paradise but if you're looking for people singing and dancing in the streets come to PP on a Friday night on the Boulevard you'll find it ………just an idea

Hahahahaha this weekend there will be soooooo much singing and dancing and drinking!!!

@planner oh boy, you so speak the truth and you did it with 2 scoops of kindness!

I'm a recent retiree, low maintenance , not looking for paradise. I have not visited DR yet. But have heard good things about it and seems still close to USA for critical health care if needed later. I've been to mexico, c.r. , and various other islands (but as a tourist not a place to retire)

im looking fora place to retire outside of the US that is not a tourist spot . I know alittle spanish but not enough to converse . Is DR a place I could move to and able to survive while I learn  the language ? 

Welcome to the forums.  Yes you can get by here without Spanish. Once here you can immerse yourself. In it if you choose.

Most areas with English speakers will tend to be more touristy but not all.  You need to come visit and check out various parts of the country!

@kcir71657

        I'm a retiree and bought a place in the DR ( puerto plata ) just for some of the reasons you mentioned….3-1/2 hours out of NY for me which is like a bus ride…..puerto plata is a little more

laid back then a lot of other areas less English speaking people less tourists no hustling and very laid back , you can adopt pretty easily ,  I don't speak Spanish but I have learned a few words so when I go into the store's

if a Dominican woman is mad at yer I have no idea what she's saying so that works out pretty good

just say si,si,si, ……. As a retiree every day is Saturday so here you can do whatever you want whenever you want……not all but.most of the prices here for consumer goods here are about 60% cheaper for me

so that work …. Come and visit check it out stay away from the resorts so you can get a real feel of life here ….. I visited 3-4 years before deciding to settle in

@polo1club you are absolutely correct I agree 100% the big difference Jerry's that most of the people are smiling. I'll come here for 10 years and I just built the house I love it here and the people

@polo1club ……Well said.

when you move from a ''first world '' country to a third world sandbar you have to lower expectations.  things will not be just like the place you left. however, i have met numerous expats here who have made the best of the environs and the realities and have been very happy and have done very well.

more often than not the people who are unhappy and complain incessantly will never be happy anywhere on the planet... to them life is a burden in all its forms. they were just as miserable wherever they came from, and will be wherever they go to in the future..

a few weeks ago  a gentleman asked me to find him a car. i located a really lovely vehicle, and he was happy with what i presented. so, what went wrong, you ask?

well, he could not travel from POP to the capital. it was just too far, and a sacrifice he was unprepared to make. he would look for something closer to home..one three hour trip on a bus was just too much to endure. 

people like that fly into fits of anguish if the lights go off, and cannot be consoled.

again its all about adaptability!  Those who can - they stay and enjoy. Those who cannot - leave or stay and are miserable. The choice is up to each of us.

I will ask us to please stop using outdated languaging.     The Dominican republic is classified as a developing nation.   The use of 1st, 2nd and 3rd world are  derogatory and  classist.  This was updated some years ago and lets all try to remember to  be less derogetory.

@polo1club

I love the DR, the people, the music, the family culture, the food, the beaches and so much more. As a matter of fact I lived in the DR for two years 89-90 during which time I met and married my Dominican Bride Yngris! We love the country so much we will more than likely return to retire (refire!) there. Yeah, there's negatives everywhere but lot's of great positives in the DR so don't worry, be happy and enjoy the journey

Anyone who finds the Dominican way of life to be objectionable need only visit neighboring Haiti or remain at home. Tolerance and respect are helpful in adjusting to life in the soli and cultures of individuals with whom one disagrees. The choice is yours, so take it or leave it.

@planner

I like that, DR classified as a developing nation. WOW like it's really developing fast. Just look at all the new projects happening in Santiago alone. I mean here's just a few great projects happening now:

• A new public rail system like we rode all over Singapore.
• The new Amber coast highway route 25 will make a drive from Santiago to the North Coast in half hour! Yngris and I will be on that highway alot, lol...weekend vacations to beaches, snorkel, fishing, scuba, fresh seafood okay now I'm going to start packing
• Plus the new Santiago Center Mall is going up on Avenida Estrella Sadhala.
• STI Airport is getting a new terminal.
• Beautifully designed Condominio Halo Sideral, el primer edificio de mas de 20 niveles. 3 tower units, high class living.
• Plus Homs Hospital and modern Supermarkets with lots of great stuff like: La Sirena, El Encuentro, Price Smart, El Nacional, Bravo y mas.

We have been following a couple of guys on Youtube that are both local Dominicans. Gary de Arriba @ Andariego DO about tourism all over the DR very good quality videos and Bill Lockward as he documents the many new projects all over the country with several of the ones I mentioned in Santiago. Really informative! Looking forward to moving back to Santiago some day and when that day comes I'm confident we will find it a precious jewel, a real World Class City!

I will have to agree wholeheartedly that the DR is not for everyone. Like was said by someone previously there are always going to be people that feel the need to say derogatory remarks about the DR. Yes there are many things that could be addressed regarding the DR but if you intend to move, visit, invest here then you should do yourself a favor and spend as much time as possible exploring and learning about the DR. If you come here with the mindset from whatever your home country is you will definitely need to change your outlook and embrace the the way things are done here otherwise you will be forever disappointed. I have two different mindsets that I use in my life one is for the U.S. and one is for the DR and I will say honestly my wife and I are much happier when we are in DR. We have already built a small home here last year and are currently building another home right now which should be completed by June so we can spend the summer here. We just arrived in DR yesterday and feel so relaxed already like we have been here forever. Well sorry for the long post but just wanted to share my feelings about the DR. Have a great day everyone.

Thank you for sharing!  Sometimes posts just need to be long!

@DRforme I agree with having two mindsets, makes total sense. Need to change hats depending on where you're at in space and time.