How you adapt to a slow pace life

08/25/21

Hi, Amy,

Great question.

One thing that has helped me structure my day is learning a new language on Duolingo.  I spend the first hour or two after breakfast working on my Italian, and it helps the time fly. 

I've also become active in Quora, and learn a lot of miscellaneous things every day.

Now that we're vaccinated  and able to walk in the park again, I've downloaded the Merlin bird identification app from Cornell University onto my phone.  One result of the pandemic here in Manaus is that it has scattered the crowds of feral cats as they've had to range farther for food.  That's let the birds return, and I can take a picture of one and identify it immediately on the app.

And podcasts, podcasts, podcasts!   

You're in a great place, and the health situation can only improve.  So, just hang on for the better days that are coming.

In 2001, I moved from a county of 3 million people in Southern CA to a small town of 3000 people in Central Italy where not one person spoke English. 

I moved there first because my husband was still working at the time.  Living alone for 3.5 years, at first without knowing a soul in the entire country except the realtor who sold me my house, I joined the Women's Club which was ran by Catholic nuns (it's Italy after all) and volunteered to tutor English in an after-school program.  From those two clubs, my social circle expanded from one person to about half a dozen. 

Even though I was alone day after day, I was never bored.  I didn't rely on the Internet to make friends; I walked from one end of the street to another end, stopped in shops, smiled and greeted people. 

Going to the market every morning (it's the way of life), I talked to the vegetable growers and sellers, the butcher, the bread-maker, the cheese maker, the pasta maker.  None of the conversation was deep, but it's one way for people to see me and know me.  I also went to the cafe, sat at an outside table with a glass of wine every afternoon (again, it's the way of life).  At first, I was a strange and suspicious sight because women did not drink alone in public especially in small towns, but after a while, people started to nod at me, then they smiled and said buongiorno. 

The sign that I belonged came when the foreman who restored my house invited me to join his family on their annual pig slaughter day (a tradition, happened on or around Nov 1 when cold temperature began but before the snow arrived.)  Then I was invited to harvest grapes and make wine, then months later, to taste wine. 

When my husband took an early retirement and moved over, we both joined CAI (Club Alpino Italiano, a mountain hiking club), and our circle became bigger and bigger.

I don't know how slow Brazilian life is, but when I lived in that small town in Italy, it took 3 months of weekly phone calls and reminders before the electrician came to my house to replace the starter in my laundry room's fluorescent lamp (I knew how to do it, but no way in Hades would I mess with electricity when living alone.)  Everything was slow; remember, the term "Slow Food" also started in Italy.  That's the way life was, and I happily immersed in it for 7 years.

Four years ago, we moved to Vietnam, not a slow pace country but not a reliable country either, and a different kind of adaption began.

Ciambella wrote:

it took 3 months of weekly phone calls and reminders before the electrician came to my house to replace the starter in my laundry room's fluorescent lamp -- I knew how to do it, but no way in Hades would I mess with electricity when living alone.

Good tip.  Worth repeating, I'd say.

Good luck going forward in your resort city that I understand is Saigon's default getaway place.

cccmedia

When things get slow, members can do further explorations into the offerings of Expat.com ...

You've already found at least one thread on the Expat Café.  There are plenty more to read or post on.

There is also the classified area...

And periodic articles about individual Expat experiences from Mexico to potentially Timbuktu (that's in Africa).

There are Spanish-language-teaching threads on the Ecuador forum and a Spanish idioms thread on the Colombia forum.

There are even foreign-language threads for the posters on this slow-pace living thread who are English speakers with ties to Italy or its beautiful language.

cccmedia

Brighten any day with a visit to the Milperthusky streaming channel on YouTube.

See how 10-year-old Siberian husky Millie, who became a loving 'teddy bear' when she gave birth to a litter several years ago, cheers up Paps' younger boy whenever he is blue.

Check out the adventures of two-year-old husky Lola whom Paps has decided to clear for her own maternal experiences later this year.

Search at YouTube.com...
          funny baby attempts to bathe stubborn husky

Thanks everybody.  I will consider your suggestions.  I will definitely pursue learning Spanish.  Here, it is unbearably hot and very humid and most people remain indoors during the day. The average age here is less than 30 years old so the conversation is very different and I am trying to avoid judging and not having much in common in terms of conversation and interest.

Your situation seems unsettled and gloomy, Amy.

Why Belize?  Why two hours from the airport?  Why this climate?

Why pursue the paperwork to stay on?

Have you considered cooler places such as Lake Chapala, Lake Atitlán, Chiriquí, Medellín, Andean Ecuador, the Black Hills?

Location matters.  Is the universe giving you daily messages that you have not yet found the right place for you?

cccmedia in Quito

Have you always been a person who tries to spend every minute productively?

I'm more of a go-with-a-flow type. I have responsibilities to be done. But my spare time can be full of different activities, or I can spend the whole day lying in a bed watching Netflix without blaming myself for dawdling.

But I have a friend, and I suppose she has an additional engine. Because she's always busy with something. Her life consists of work, social connections, multiple hobbies, self-care routine, shopping, etc.

So, my advice would be to find any activity you've never tried. Who knows, maybe you're into knitting but don't realize it. 

MaryMoHunt wrote:

So, my advice would be to find any activity you've never tried. Who knows, maybe you're into knitting but don't realize it. 

That's precisely what I did when we left Italy and returned to the States. 

One day, looking out the window at the fall foliage of the New England area, I said to my husband, "I love pretty sweaters and I like rum-soaked sweets, may be I'll learn to knit and make fruitcake."  He shuddered at the mention of fruitcake.

The next day, I signed up for a class on "How to Knit a Handbag."  I hated it!  Not the knitting, but the handbag and the feel of boiled wool.  I asked the owner of the yarn shops for ideas.  She sold me a good deal of yarns and books, and told me I couldn't go wrong with YouTube and Ravelry.  She's absolutely correct.

Three months later, in the middle of New England winter, I wore a matching scarf and hat that I knitted myself, using a complicate pattern and free help from Ravelry members.  Eventually, my wardrobe became overflowed with my own knitwear, and at least twice a year, I received requests for handknit fancy tops from female relatives, and specially knitted sweaters, beanies, and scarves from my son who wanted images of Doctor Who's Tardis, Star Trek, Marvel Comics, etc.)

I never learned to make fruitcake, but I became a very good knitter out of a "maybe I'll try" remark to my husband.

Amy5000 wrote:

Here, it is unbearably hot and very humid and most people remain indoors during the day. The average age here is less than 30 years old so the conversation is very different and I am trying to avoid judging and not having much in common in terms of conversation and interest.

The heat is a tough one, if you don't like it.  There are places in Northeastern Brazil that are hot like that, and many people do stay inside during the heat of the day.

The Portuguese tried to build their settlements on hilltops whenever they could to catch any passing breeze:  that's why the oldest parts of many Brazilian cities are on higher ground.  You may find some relief by moving uphill from where you are now.  Ceiling fans can help a lot.  Room air conditioners can make sleeping a lot easier at  night.

Texas can get pretty hot, so you probably already have some coping skills to rely on.  Heat is a silent killer, though, so trust your body.  If you start feeling unwell, it might be time to leave.  All the best to you. 

When I first moved to the tropics, from very temperate Germany, every step outside of aircon'ed spaces felt like being hit by a sledgehammer that made me want to melt on the spot.
But it is amazing how well our body can adjust, if you let it: I never used my own aircon (open windows are much more pleasant!), forced myself to go for long walks (despite rivers of sweat), drink lots and eat healthily. Gradually, over six months, I sweat less and less, became fitter and felt generally o.k. with the conditions in my new home. I started cycling everywhere, even in the heat of the day (getting used to the traffic and road conditions was another matter, but I also managed that), and ended up knowing my surroundings better than the locals.
I don't remember a moment of being bored, in my 15 years abroad. How you feel is determined within you - which means it can also be changed by you (and nobody else)!

beppi wrote:

I don't remember a moment of being bored, in my 15 years abroad. How you feel is determined within you - which means it can also be changed by you (and nobody else)!

FWIW, I've never feel bored in my home country or abroad. 

During the years living alone in another country, I felt lonely on Thanksgiving and Fourth of July (the only two true American holidays), but I did not feel bored.  I enjoyed being with myself, reading books, learning the new language, trying the new cuisine, watching people, taking photos of my new environment, adapting to the new customs and traditions...

Gosh, there are so many things to see, to do, to enjoy when living abroad.  Traveling is wonderful but can be too short sometimes.  Living abroad provides me with a longer opportunity to explore the new country and discover myself in that country; it's like panning for gold.