Maintaining a long distance relationship as an expat in China

If you live and work year round in China and try to revive any relationships at home, they will most likely not work out.  If, however, you can arrange to work only six months a year or less in China and spend the other time with your significant other, there is a good chance you can sustain your relationship.  I have learned this from experience.  In addition, if you can arrange a week or two visit from your significant other during your six month or less stay, it will increase the chances of sustaining your relationship.

For long term Western males, no hope, you will succumb to the beauty of Chinese Females.

I had a friend a few years ago who had a large business in Hong Kong, and he employed around 70 Australians or English at any one time, and he states that not a single Male he knew who worked for him for longer than about 18 months, didn't end up divorced or out of their Western relationship and to be with a Chinese girl.

Look I'm just going to be the one that says it easy for you to understand. Long distance relationships don't work unless you are sexually inexperienced-sexually inactive or just too old to get it up.


Unfortunately, relationships are not natural (yes, says the guy who is married and a father), but the reality is that relationships are forced by oneself on oneself and then afterwards normalized (also known as domestication); open relationships are more natural as we are innately animals. No matter how civilized you are, fantasizing is going to happen, and fantasizing is one step away from a bad excuse to cheat on your significant other.

The older you are, the easier distance is-unless you are a legitimate workaholic, in which case-that sucks. But to each their own.

Just putting it out there for ya. If the anyone under the age of 30 in China is having a long distance relationship (Chinese females) in 2019, expect a lot of text messages and stupid emoji messages that you don't really know how to back and respond to unless you look back on how you acted in high school and basically send different heart/love stickers/emojis back and forward until you pass out.

Never happened to me-just think its ridiculous how inexperienced and naive some folks are.

Quote: Panadabiz and that ridiculous sounding scenario

Dude, are you sure he wasn't running a "mail-order bride" business?

Arthur H Tafero wrote:

If you live and work year round in China and try to revive any relationships at home, they will most likely not work out.  If, however, you can arrange to work only six months a year or less in China and spend the other time with your significant other, there is a good chance you can sustain your relationship.  I have learned this from experience.  In addition, if you can arrange a week or two visit from your significant other during your six month or less stay, it will increase the chances of sustaining your relationship.

You're a creative one, man-but who is working in China for 6 months or less?

cbono90 wrote:

Quote: Panadabiz and that ridiculous sounding scenario

Dude, are you sure he wasn't running a "mail-order bride" business?

Having been in China for 15 years, I have no reason to doubt it, and I know numbers of similar Western Males in that scenerio personally..

To support your notion to a degree from a different angle, a definate few of the females are certainly "Visa Vampires".

cbono90 wrote:

You're a creative one, man-but who is working in China for 6 months or less?

What? I've seen plenty come over for around 2 to 4 months (usually Engineers on projects) and 6 months (usually English Conversational Teachers).

With your couple of replies questioning other's experiences, I don't think you know China anywhere near as much as you think you do.

pandabiz wrote:

cbono90 wrote:

You're a creative one, man-but who is working in China for 6 months or less?

What? I've seen plenty come over for around 2 to 4 months (usually Engineers on projects) and 6 months (usually English Conversational Teachers).

With your couple of replies questioning other's experiences, I don't think you know China anywhere near as much as you think you do.

hahaha maybe not, everyone knows it the way they know it I guess-some know it as a land to pick Chinese girls; some know it as a land of job opportunity; others-don't care.