Create rituals that help you ground and comfort yourself
As an introvert, it's easy to feel overwhelmed by the newness of many spaces. You're not used to navigating the streets of your new town/city like the back of your hand, and its sights, sounds and smells might be disorientating. You cannot go to your favorite park or café for a moment of quiet and peace like you did back home. You cannot go to your best friend's or grandma's house and bask in the familiarity of the place.
The good thing is that you can find new “cocoons” and recreate comforting rituals. During your first week, explore the town/city and find places that appeal to you. For instance, find a café whose decoration and food you like, and start going there regularly on the weekend so that you develop an attachment to the place. This way, whenever you feel overwhelmed, you have this “safe space” to retreat to and be comfortably alone in.
An exercise routine can also give you a sense of structure that mitigates any feeling of being lost. Find a park or gym that you like, and keep fixed time slots every week to work out there. An artistic practice like painting or creative writing can also provide you with the space for solitude that you need to recharge, as well as help you work through complex feelings you have about being in a new country.
You can also talk directly about these experiences as a new expat through journaling, blogging, or podcasting. The last two can help you share what you're feeling with your family and friends back home and, if your blog/podcast is public, even help you connect with other introverted expats experiencing the same things. It can be easier for introverts to first connect online before feeling comfortable enough to meet in person.
Personalize the space you live in to feel at home
When you first move into your new apartment or house, it might feel very impersonal. Make sure to bring a few items from back home which can make the place feel more like your “nest.” Even if you weren't able to pack much, these can be things as simple as posters of your favorite bands or movies, mugs, tablecloths and framed family photos.
To build more attachment to your new country, consider buying some unique decorative items there too. You could go thrift shopping or buy handmade products made by local artisans to adorn your house. What's important is that, even if you know you'll be living in that house for only a few years, it needs to feel like a personalized “nest” you can retreat into to recharge your social batteries.
On the forum of Expat.com, one expat in Oman, Abhi181993, shares that he's added one potted plant to each room and created a gallery wall where he can pin photos and other mementos. Even if the furniture he's invested in is minimal and utilitarian, he feels like these extra decorative touches are important to keep a “collection of memories” of his expat journey. He also chose a variety of lamps in different rooms to make the apartment more charming at night, which can surely help make someone feel cozier.
Connect with others over shared hobbies – even if only online at first
Superficial socialization is often draining for introverts. They tend to favor deeper and more one-on-one connections. It can be difficult for them to connect with people at large parties or in crowded bars. At work, they might prefer working alone and struggle with small talk by the coffee machine.
The best way for them to connect with new people is through shared passions and hobbies. If you're hesitant about going to new hangouts alone, try to connect with people online first. Join social media groups for people interested in gardening, cinema, anime, cooking or whatever other passion you have. The registration link to events related to these activities will also be posted on these groups.
There also exist specialized websites to find out about such events. Meetup and Eventbrite are well-known ones. You could join an online book club that also meets in person biweekly or monthly. Some dating apps have a “Friends” option, which indicates that you are looking for new friends and not dates. Bumble, for instance, calls this the BFF feature. The forums of specialized expat websites like Expat.com also allow you to connect with people online first.
Of course, don't put too much pressure on yourself to attend too many events. Take things at your own pace, retreat into your safe spaces and soothing rituals when things feel overwhelming, and focus on building a few quality bonds rather than scattering your energy into too many activities.
Seek expat coaching and communicate your needs to your superiors at work
If all of the above looks too confusing, it might be a good idea to seek personalized help from an expat coach. You don't need to meet them in person at first if you're uncomfortable with the idea. Many coaches do one-on-one sessions through video-conferencing apps (Zoom, Skype, Teams, etc.) or on the phone.
To feel at ease around the coach, the first session can simply be a “get-to-know-one-another session. In the following sessions, you can tackle more specific adaptation issues related to your introversion. Your coach will probably set realistic goals/deliverables and ask you to keep track of them, perhaps in the form of a journal.
At work, you can also communicate with your manager about your adaptation process. If you're not comfortable with big networking events, ask them to integrate you into a small group of co-workers who you can get to know better. Some universities assign local “buddies” to new international students, so your manager can also ask someone to be your workplace “buddy” in your first months to help you navigate the place.
Activities at work that are more centered around specific hobbies rather than small talk might also suit you more. Board game nights are an example. You can ask your manager if they plan on organizing such activities.
