Filipina gf in Manila wants me to sign birth certificate

I'm new here and just need some advice. I met a filipina last year I really hit it off with in Manila. I met her on Tinder (yes I know its bad reputation), spent 2 weeks with her and had the best time of my life. Well one thing led to another and shes now due to give birth next month. I don't have any problem supporting the child, but this isn't a woman I want to marry. More red flags than the Chinese army: 3 kids from different men, smoker, insanely jealous type, and she insists I say 'I love you' twice a day. But now she is saying she 'needs' me to sign the birth cert next month when the baby is born.

Could signing this come back to bite me if I live in Canada? As in, come after me? FWIW I'm self-employed and work online. No kids other than this one. But I ain't rich either.

Points to consider:
- I know the baby is mine. She knows it. The baby will know it. So what possible benefit is there for me to sign it other than her saving face for her parents whom she lives with, AND giving the government ammo to come after me down the line? I'd rather send any aid myself and leave the govt (and lawyers) out of it completely.

- Sometimes I feel like I am being gamed. We only really have movies in common (and maybe music) and I know she is dirt poor with no education. But how can I tell if she really loves me as much as she says? Is there some 'test' I could employ to gauge her honesty?

- INSANE jealousy. I once mentioned my ex to her, who've I've not seen in 20 years and have no intention of getting back with. She gave me the silent treatment for 2 days. Said it ruined her whole day even though I casually mentioned it in passing. Though when I left her back in Oct she didn't shed a single tear when I said goodbye (I thought filipinas were very passionate with their lovers so this has been bothering me for some time).

- Hasn't asked me for any money (yet). Just my sig on the birth cert.

- Lives near her ex. Sees him almost every day though they do not talk except when sharing the kids. He is abusive, stalker type. Dangerous.


Haven't done a DNA test but I plan to ASAP.

Thanks for reading...

First thing is if you don't want to have children is to get the "snip" vasectomy, or use a condom, unless you want herpies, UTI, NSI, aids,  warts on your private part, etc

If the child is yours and you want to support it, then of course get your name on the birth certificate.

There are a lot of cowards that come here to the Philippine's and leave unwanted children, you don't sound like one as you say you want to support the child, so good on you and well done.

Points to consider:
- I know the baby is mine. She knows it. The baby will know it. So what possible benefit is there for me to sign it other than her saving face for her parents whom she lives with, AND giving the government ammo to come after me down the line? I'd rather send any aid myself and leave the govt (and lawyers) out of it completely.

The kid is yours and you know it.

Benefits are for the mother and kid, not you - you had your 'benifits' earlier.
This is a 'man up and do what you should' thing, not a time to be selfish.
As for her history - doesn't matter.

Would she agree for a DNA test? If yes, you should do it. If the baby is yours, man up and put your signature on the dotted line. The baby needs support!

I'm not sure about Canada, but putting your name on the birth certificate might help the kid to claim citizenship.
If you are really concerned, it would be worth it to contact a lawyer in the Philippines and ask about any  ramifications.

If you sign on the dotted line, the baby is also a Canadian citizen or have dual citizenship by virtue of Jus sanguinis which is recognized in Canada. Consider that as your initial gift...

Anchor baby for mummy? Not that I'm making an accusation, but that might well be a consideration the lady made whilst horizontal ... or maybe over a washing machine on fast spin.

Well, maybe. Women nowadays think and plan accordingly. Birth tourism is planned by Chinese women for the US, Canada, Brazil and other countries. At least this woman got pregnant in her own country.

soothesayer

Let me put you in touch with a Canadian expat living here in Quezon City! He just had a baby girl with his Filipina gf! He has been through hell on paperwork just trying to get the baby her Canadian citizenship and is just now getting her a passport and that is an ordeal also! Point is he has a lot of answers and advice and who and where to do everything you will need to do! I'm going to send you a private message!

Hey guys he needs to be aware that if the woman was married or is married and no annullment he can be jailed here for adultery! Get a cenomar or annulment certificate before you even think of coming here!

lasvegan :

Hey guys he needs to be aware that if the woman was married or is married and no annullment he can be jailed here for adultery! Get a cenomar or annulment certificate before you even think of coming here!

Buddy... pse correct me if I'm wrong!
Girl meets Boy (Consenting Adults)...(Girl does not declare she is married nor does he ask!)
Mutually they agree to have unprotected sex (he has the time of his life/and then she gets pregnant!) ....Now he can get into trouble with the law???....This does not sound at all like justice to me!
:|
Just askng

Soothesayer :

I met her on Tinder (yes I know its bad reputation), spent 2 weeks with her and had the best time of my life. Well one thing led to another and shes now due to give birth next month.

Haven't done a DNA test but I plan to ASAP.

You met her on Tinder on Monday.
You flew to the Philippines on Tuesday.
You had unprotected sex on Wednesday.
You found out she was pregnant on Thursday.
You found out she had a baby on Friday.
You knew the baby was yours on Saturday.
You should have bought a one way ticket home on Sunday.

So when you got home you bought some Condoms.

Also the possibility of a condom failure....Take nothing for granted!!!
:D

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.co … a-50472710

manwonder :
lasvegan :

Hey guys he needs to be aware that if the woman was married or is married and no annullment he can be jailed here for adultery! Get a cenomar or annulment certificate before you even think of coming here!

Buddy... pse correct me if I'm wrong!
Girl meets Boy (Consenting Adults)...(Girl does not declare she is married nor does he ask!)
Mutually they agree to have unprotected sex (he has the time of his life/and then she gets pregnant!) ....Now he can get into trouble with the law???....This does not sound at all like justice to me!
:|
Just askng

The law here is very clear! And it holds that if any other crime was committed that led to this they are both seperate and don't let anyone off the hook!

lasvegan :
manwonder :
lasvegan :

Hey guys he needs to be aware that if the woman was married or is married and no annullment he can be jailed here for adultery! Get a cenomar or annulment certificate before you even think of coming here!

Buddy... pse correct me if I'm wrong!
Girl meets Boy (Consenting Adults)...(Girl does not declare she is married nor does he ask!)
Mutually they agree to have unprotected sex (he has the time of his life/and then she gets pregnant!) ....Now he can get into trouble with the law???....This does not sound at all like justice to me!
:|
Just askng

The law here is very clear! And it holds that if any other crime was committed that led to this they are both seperate and don't let anyone off the hook!

Yes as always....you make me want to hear DR.HOOK & The Medicine Show ~ "Sylvia's Mother"

:D

DNA test first

manwonder :

Also the possibility of a condom failure....Take nothing for granted!!!
:D

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.co … a-50472710

If the poster Soothesayer was a Soothsayer he would have bought a condom. He said he had the best time of his life, what he didn't tell you: "I had the best time of my life until my weenie fell off". You say you know it's yours, she said she knows it's yours,  but you say the Baby will know it's yours. HaHaHaHa, .  .  .  . I'm laughing all the way to the Pharmacy to buy a condom.

Remember when Abraham pleated with God to save Sodom and Gomorrah (Uganda). God said find me a 1000 responsible  men who use condoms, then 100 responsible men who use condoms, then 10 responsible men that use condoms . . . . . . .

None could be found that used those studded condoms that failed or any condoms.

Ask a Filipino what a condom is . . . . .They probably don't know and those that do know will tell you they don't use them because they are too big and fall off.

Ask a Ugandan what a condom is . . . . They probably don't know and those that do know will tell you
they don't use them because they are too small to fit.

As I said earlier, consult a lawyer.

As far as adultery is concerned, getting pregnant is the same as having sex with a married woman who you know to be married.  Of course this would mean that half the boom boom going on with bar girls is adultery.  So I guess "don't ask don't tell" policies should be practiced.  Also, it would seem that if the lady were to accuse someone, she would be putting herself in jeopardy also.

"1. Legislation
Articles 333 and 334 of The Revised Penal Code provide the following:
Art. 333. Who are guilty of adultery. — Adultery is committed by any married woman who shall have sexual
intercourse with a man not her husband and by the man who has carnal knowledge of her knowing her to be
married, even if the marriage be subsequently declared void.
Adultery shall be punished by prision correccional in its medium and maximum periods.
If the person guilty of adultery committed this offense while being abandoned without justification by the
offended spouse, the penalty next lower in degree than that provided in the next preceding paragraph shall be
imposed."

Soothesayer :

I'm new here and just need some advice. I met a filipina last year I really hit it off with in Manila. I met her on Tinder (yes I know its bad reputation), spent 2 weeks with her and had the best time of my life. Well one thing led to another and shes now due to give birth next month. I don't have any problem supporting the child, but this isn't a woman I want to marry.

I'm rolling my eyes over this.

Almost all parents in America remind their teenage kids to use protection to avoid unwanted pregnancies and STD's. Some of the kids falter because they're young and immature.  But you are a grown man, and yet you acted so recklessly like a teenager.

----

This is my take on your issue:

Some Filipino women, who were left behind by their husbands for some reason, have the mentality that the way to support herself and her kids is to hook up with another man who will support her and her kids from her previous relationship. She will do this whether or not the ex gives her money or support.

She might even want to have babies with the new bf so that the bf will feel obligated to give her money in case their relationship does not work out. When they do break up, she will move on to another guy, and another, and another, and might even want to have babies with them too, and use the kids as leverage. This is probably  why some women, despite having already too many children, will prefer not to undergo tubal ligation.

It's good that you intend to give support to your kid. But it will likely be that your kid will benefit from only a portion of that amount. Your remittance will be used to support her entire family. And you will not have any control over it.

Later on, would you like to bring your kid to Canada? Good luck with that. Well, do you think your gf would let go of the goose the lays golden eggs, unless of course there's the possibility of it laying even bigger golden eggs?  As they say, a bird in one hand is worth two in the bush. She will probably not let go of your kid.

These are the consequences of having unprotected sex with a person you hardly know. (Pun not intended.) I would suggest getting an STD test, if you haven't already.

"Almost all parents in America remind their teenage kids to use protection to avoid unwanted pregnancies and STD's. Some of the kids falter because they're young and immature.  But you are a grown man, and yet you acted so recklessly like a teenager."

There are 3 million unintended pregnancies in the US each year and the US has one of the highest rates in the developed world.

Don't cast any stones.  He may have only known her for a little time but how long did you know her?  Long enough, I guess, to make judgments.

1st) DNA test for the child/STD test for yourself.
2nd) Do what your conscience tells you to.

Just because the woman says the baby is yours does not make it so.  Get a DNA test done before signing anything.

Met an Expat on a fast ferry to Cebu who told my wife and I his story about how he married a very young Filipina, they had an argument, she left for 10 days, and 9 months later had a BROWN BABY.  He has become attached to the baby now, wife he does not trust at all, but is paying for her to go to college, but probably is getting horizontal dance lessons.

Yes if she only "separated" she is still legally married. I heard about men who are married (separated) to a woman he has children with blackmailing foreigners got children with his x.
If a filipina say she is separated she is still leagaly married.

New topic