Expensive TET

AkaMaverick :

Fortunately the first day is over.

At 8 in the morning we started visiting relatives.
Each time we eat and drink until just before bursting.
The ass hurts from sitting on the traditional wooden or stone benches.
And of course handed over many presents and around 8 million Dong lucky money (2 parents, 3 grandparents and a lot of children).

Tomorrow morning we will start the second round.

Afterwards and the following days waiting at home on the soft sofa for visits from relatives.
And again constantly eating, nibbling and drinking.
What else should I do since I can't talk due to lack of knowledge of Vietnamese.  :lol:

I give you credit, much better than I.  We never gave out more than 1 million in total and it was limited to immediate family only.  When we visited the extended family, we did not bring gifts, but we did bring food which is basically a few 100k.  I would sit with all the men, no women never, and we would drink beer and eat like forever.  I know some Vietnamese but not alot.  However, we had a good time and laughed all day and I really enjoyed it.  One time an uncle gave me the tour of his farm and he was proud.  It was amazing because they don't work and just have this large farm which is more than enough to maintain multiple families.  Try to learn some Vietnamese, drink lots of beer, get drunk and have fun, worked for me, even though I don't like beer.

We got here on Thursday so I am already going on four days in.  As stated an earlier post three days of hometown is my limit.  Still have a day to go, maybe go home Monday.

Still have more family and friends to go to see today.  Yesterday was continuous. Sit, drink, eat and smile. Move to next place.  Rinse and repeat.

SteinNebraska :

Sit, drink, eat and smile.

Yesterday my wife left me alone with her father for about an hour (she visited without me the grandmother who talks bad about me).
The father-in-law spoke to me all the time and I smiled all the time and nodded in between. It was a very long hour.

Although it is difficult for me to learn foreign languages, I will start learning Vietnamese (a mix of internet research and help from my wife) in the near future.

AkaMaverick :

The father-in-law spoke to me all the time and I smiled all the time and nodded in between. It was a very long hour.

Although it is difficult for me to learn foreign languages, I will start learning Vietnamese (a mix of internet research and help from my wife) in the near future.

That will change.  My father in law knows I don’t understand a word he says.  I wake early, as does he.  We sit in the front veranda, he drinks tea, I drink a mountain dew (damn Pepsi for not importing diet Mt. Dew) and we don’t say a word past hello.  It’s no longer uncomfortable.

Good luck on the Vietnamese.  After a year I can order a beer and tell a girl she is pretty but that is about it but that is because I have been able to be lazy with a business partner during the day and wife at night that speak English.  And, we are going home in a year.

SteinNebraska :
AkaMaverick :

The father-in-law spoke to me all the time and I smiled all the time and nodded in between. It was a very long hour.

Although it is difficult for me to learn foreign languages, I will start learning Vietnamese (a mix of internet research and help from my wife) in the near future.

That will change.

I have been married for two and a half years and have known the family for about 3 years.
Nothing has changed, because both parents of my wife cannot keep quiet for a minute.

But the situation is not that bad, because after the marriage I made it clear early on that I don't want to sit at the rather intellectually undemanding smoker-men's table all the time where I don't understand anything anyway.
My wife passed this on, but of course not in this form.
Since then there are no longer separate tables for men and women (and children) at parties in the immediate family circle.
So my wife usually translates all the time.

Expensive Tet........Opposite for me,  4 months ago while  on Holliday in Canada I did a bit of research on giving “lucky money” to children. I went and exchanged some Canadian dollars for a bunch of US  $1 notes. Well on New Years Eve as well as last night armed with this money in red envelopes I went to the fireworks display at front beach tried to give it to some of the little kids there only to be stoped by their parents, maybe they thought I was a bit strange. Still have it all, will try again tonight.
Wadey

AkaMaverick :
SteinNebraska :
AkaMaverick :

The father-in-law spoke to me all the time and I smiled all the time and nodded in between. It was a very long hour.

Although it is difficult for me to learn foreign languages, I will start learning Vietnamese (a mix of internet research and help from my wife) in the near future.

That will change.

I have been married for two and a half years and have known the family for about 3 years.
Nothing has changed, because both parents of my wife cannot keep quiet for a minute.

But the situation is not that bad, because after the marriage I made it clear early on that I don't want to sit at the rather intellectually undemanding smoker-men's table all the time where I don't understand anything anyway.
My wife passed this on, but of course not in this form.
Since then there are no longer separate tables for men and women (and children) at parties in the immediate family circle.
So my wife usually translates all the time.

Been there done that! I could never come to terms or can now never come to terms with the men all at one table getting pissed out of their minds & trying their best to get the foreigner pissed too. Sounds like you got the message across on that one, well done!

unionjack :

Been there done that! I could never come to terms or can now never come to terms with the men all at one table getting pissed out of their minds & trying their best to get the foreigner pissed too. Sounds like you got the message across on that one, well done!

They don’t know that they are dealing with a professional so I let them all go around the table one time with me for 100% and after that I tell them one drinks, they all drink.  They all go home drunk around 2:00pm.

Mike Wagner :

Stunning but not that surprising as pretty much all that matters to people in Vietnam is: money.

Nah, man. It's not just in Vietnam. It's all over the world. It's everywhere. Name one country that money does not matter to its people. Good luck! :)

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dannyC :
Mike Wagner :

Stunning but not that surprising as pretty much all that matters to people in Vietnam is: money.

Nah, man. It's not just in Vietnam. It's all over the world. It's everywhere. Name one country that money does not matter to its people. Good luck! :)

Its obvious you missed his point.

The tally of Tết:

Gifts arrived before the 1st:  Traditional Tết food, signature food from the givers' hometowns, a rose plant for my balcony, and a carton of Tiger beer for my husband.

The number of people who came to pay their respect (I'm the family matriarch so we didn't go to other people's homes except for one celebratory luncheon) since the 1st Day of Tết:  26. 

The amount of lucky money we handed out:  3.5M

The amount of money we received (I've reached a certain age this year so in addition to personal respect and wishes, some of the relatives also presented me with longevity money):  1.5M

Another year of tradition upheld when it mattered:  Priceless.

Ciambella :

The tally of Tết:

Gifts arrived before the 1st:  Traditional Tết food, signature food from the givers' hometowns, a rose plant for my balcony, and a carton of Tiger beer for my husband.

The number of people who came to pay their respect (I'm the family matriarch so we didn't go to other people's homes except for one celebratory luncheon) since the 1st Day of Tết:  26. 

The amount of lucky money we handed out:  3.5M

The amount of money we received (I've reached a certain age this year so in addition to personal respect and wishes, some of the relatives also presented me with longevity money):  1.5M

Another year of tradition upheld when it mattered:  Priceless.

I can virtually guarantee that in 14 years here, that has NOT been the experience of U-J 😉

Well, I see that all my posts have been removed from this thread. I will simply reiterate what I said before: I hope Ciambella can forget the insensitive personal attack someone made and keeps posting her excellent comments.

hyagly256 :

Well, I see that all my posts have been removed from this thread. I will simply reiterate what I said before: I hope Ciambella can forget the insensitive personal attack someone made and keeps posting her excellent comments.

Thank you.  Since joining the site, I've been sharing my experiences as a native born and also as an expat.  Even as I agree with THIGV's observation that I wasn't born into a "typical" Vietnamese family, nor was I raised and educated as a typical Vietnamese woman.  Moreover, my life after 1975 wasn't the typical Vietnamese immigrant's life either.  Still, none of that affects my deep knowledge of this country's history, culture, custom, tradition, language, and *some* aspects of the law.  Therefore, I don't think I'll stop sharing just because someone has a beef against me. 

People's ire is the negative emotion they themselves have to deal with, it doesn't affect me because I don't allow it to ruffle my peace of mind.

Thank you again.  I truly appreciate your taking the time twice to post your encouragement.

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