Vietnamese ladies and their "dead" husbands...

After asking me for a coffee and upon querying a Vietnamese lady told me that her husband was dead. A few days later though I received a nasty email from her so called husband saying he was going to get his crazy on if I continued to go out with his wife. I didn't want to find out what this actually meant so that was the end of a very fleeting relationship.

Anyway I'm starting to get the impression that when it comes to a spouse dead in Vietnam can sometimes mean divorced and the husbands can well and truly be alive and in their minds still claim ownership over their ex wives (especially if their is a continuing financial benefit).

Can anyone verify this or have had a similar experience ? thanks

My wife's late husband really is dead. I've been to his gravesite with her and his daughter and they have an altar set up for him in the house.  He died on his motorbike 10 years before we met and left her with a young daughter... so not all of the 'dead husbands' are scams. I'm sorry yours was.

dbrutter wrote:

My wife's late husband really is dead. I've been to his gravesite with her and his daughter and they have an altar set up for him in the house.  He died on his motorbike 10 years before we met and left her with a young daughter... so not all of the 'dead husbands' are scams. I'm sorry yours was.


its wasn't a scam as the lady was genuine, it was just her interpretation of divorce (ie he's dead to me !)...

So the moral of the story is, if a lady ever tells you her husband is dead, ask her to bring you to his grave.  :lol:

panda7 wrote:
dbrutter wrote:

My wife's late husband really is dead. I've been to his gravesite with her and his daughter and they have an altar set up for him in the house.  He died on his motorbike 10 years before we met and left her with a young daughter... so not all of the 'dead husbands' are scams. I'm sorry yours was.


its wasn't a scam as the lady was genuine, it was just her interpretation of divorce (ie he's dead to me !)...


I struggle with...how did he know you were seeing her, she must have told him and gave him your number.
Sounds like a woman to stay away from.

Personally, I've never heard a Vietnamese woman describing her estranged husband as dead.  Many adjectives are used, but never "dead".

Ciambella wrote:

Personally, I've never heard a Vietnamese woman describing her estranged husband as dead.  Many adjectives are used, but never "dead".


I think it's something they say to men they are interested in...and instead of saying they're divorced they just say hubby is dead !

Ciambella wrote:

Personally, I've never heard a Vietnamese woman describing her estranged husband as dead.  Many adjectives are used, but never "dead".


I dated a girl in Saigon, she asked me to go with her to her home town. Once we got there she asked if I wanted to go and see her husband, I said not really. She then told me it's okay, he is dead. She wanted to go put flowers on his grave with me in tow.

colinoscapee wrote:
Ciambella wrote:

Personally, I've never heard a Vietnamese woman describing her estranged husband as dead.  Many adjectives are used, but never "dead".


I dated a girl in Saigon, she asked me to go with her to her home town. Once we got there she asked if I wanted to go and see her husband, I said not really. She then told me it's okay, he is dead. She wanted to go put flowers on his grave with me in tow.


That sounds a bit scared.

One way to avoid dead husbands is to be selfish like me, date only single women that are not widows, divorced and even if never married, no children.  I know, easier said than done, but can be done.  I got lucky, I know.

It's hard to compete with a con ma. I think vndreamer has got a good idea.

yes... my wife conveniently forgot to tell me she had previously been married...

Better to find out she's only been married once compared to finding out she's got four kids out of three marriages!  :lol: