Im American and married a saudi guy

Don't go.

A secret marriage might not be recognized in Saudi court, because permission of your dad/guardian was not obtained and ish-har (public declaration of marriage) was not done.

The last thing you need is to find yourself in limbo as a quasi-wife in a foreign land without the support of your family.

You guys should probably get it out in the open and start the bonding/acceptance thing from both sides of the family. It's gonna come sooner or later if you guys are really serious about each other. Travelling to/from Saudi is hard. Meet-ups in Bahrain will be easier.

I hope your husband has a job and housing. These are legal requirements here.

Be aware most Saudi-American marriages fail. You need to get past the infatuation and look at things from a practical perspective. Where are you going to live? At what time will he come home from work? How will you spend your time? Where else can you go for support in Saudi? How many kids? Religion? Schools, etc.

This kind of marriage can work, but only if husband and wife have detected their differences and resolved the compatibility issues. This usually takes years for cross-cultural couples. So I'm saying don't go, not yet.