Dealing with loneliness in New Zealand


Expatriation can be a fun and exciting adventure, but it can also be a bit lonely at times. Please share with us some tips for dealing with loneliness.

What are some potential factors that lead to loneliness when moving to New Zealand?

How do you deal with feelings of loneliness?

Is it easy to expand or create a social network in New Zealand?

Are there any activities or events that encourage social meet ups and networking opportunities?

Thank you for sharing your experience,


I found the best way was to join a social exercise group such as football, boxfit, Netball rugby etc. Meet lots of people, socialise and get fit at the same time.

Yes agreed.
Put yourself out there. Become part of the community.
There are always clubs to join and fun events on.
For example I am hosting a quiz evening in Karori Wellington on Thursday, as have joined my daughter's school committee and am in charge of fundraising.
People are very inclusive if you try.

PS. Come join us if you like...

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You can sign up with the gym and there are lots of choices available. I signed up with city fitness and the rates were reasonably affordable. I make an effort to spent approximately 1.5hrs per visit and it is a great place to make new friends too.

What I did was make a pact with myself to accept any offer from anybody to do anything reasonable.
Someone asked me to go to dance classes. It was so out of my comfort zone but I went anyway. I ended up doing salsa and bachata and kizomba. I also took dance classes in African dance and also swing dance. I know a lot of people who did other type of dancing including ballroom dancing and hip-hop. The dance communities are very inclusive and very friendly and a very good way to meet people and be included. Even if you are extremely shy like I am it becomes quite a support system. It also allows you to get quite a bit of exercise in.
The other thing I did was find a meetup group that did walking and hiking. This was great as it was a way to force me to get into exercise which is critical for not being lonely and feeling good about yourself.
It becomes easy to get into a rut of secluding yourself and staying in your apartment by yourself but you really have to force yourself out to do things. Look up eventfinda and always see what's going on all the time and try to go to as many things as possible. Sometimes you will be all alone but you will never know when you will meet someone interesting.
I found that going out to restaurants and bars alone as a single older guy is not conducive to helping loneliness. You must train yourself to be able to go out by yourself if you do not have anyone to go out with rather than stay at home. It's a good skill to have. Local comedy clubs at night and the theater also offer a respite in the evenings.
Again, make a pact with yourself never to turn down any offer and let people know that you have made that pack with yourself and they were more likely to invite you to things. Also you may want to look in the stores and wine shops for really good deals on wine as you may start to be invited to people's places and you need to come with a gift in your hand. Looking for wine at the last minute can be quite expensive.

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