Are 16000 RMB gross/month enough to live in Shanghai?

Thanks

Definitely if you don't live too luxury

Thanks, do you have websites to suggest for looking for a small apartment to rent in SongJiang?

Unfortunately, there is no reliable source to find apartments because of the local business etiquette and fast moving market, supply/demand and so on.
The best strategy is to book two different hotel/motel etc. depends on your budget for at least two weeks, one week each and start viewing apartments. A lot of patient and luck is needed to nail down a good deal. Good luck!

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No, the life cost in shanghai is expensive.

I wonder what kind of life are you living in SH :D