Mistakes expats make in Malaysia

I agree with goldencik, thats more or less my experience too and what i've found is that while its easy (ok not that easy) to laugh it off and get used to it, in truth these little black dots of frustrations only get larger over time. One day, you will be running down the road in bellowing madness. Really. And then you will feel badly and even regret it, too, but that wont make it go away.

But does it matter? Here is the part that does. While there are not questions of "mistakes" that will apply to everyone because each comes here under different visions, backgrounds and circumstances, one thing is sure and thats that you had better really like the place--a lot. Maybe you are a misguided fool, a miscreant or a whinging pom but whatever the correct term,  you will be leaning pretty hard on that LIKE to get you through your stay. For that reason, i'd say its critical to spend time here to get into various messes before any commitment. See how you fare. If you are annoyed by small things, bothered by unhappy differences, find yourself struggling too much to understand or be understood, thats your answer because what you are feeling is that toothy black dot gnawing at your flesh and it will never let you go.

Here is one example from me. When I first came as a tourist, I noticed that steps in buildings were unevenly made. They are seldom horizontally level and they are unevenly spaced one to the next. In one flight you can find the next step is seven inches up, the next six inches up, the next nine inches up. I thought it was funny and I laughed out loud. I should have cared but I didnt. Later, when Im on those steps again as company staff, on serious missions with little time to play and less time to laugh, I was flaming angry and thats when it hit me that uneven steps truly defined the whole country. I should have asked myself, can I repeatedly accept uneven steps when Im in a hurry to a critical meeting? Can I accept such uneven steps in peoples attitudes and ways? If I had asked that and ensuing tributary questions at the start, its possible I would have rejected the country and never come back.

Does this mean you shouldnt accept a country thats less than perfect? OF COURSE NOT. But it does mean being honest with yourself at the beginning about reasonable expectations and what you are willing to give up for the chance to achieve them. For those who are flexible, intrepid and a friend of adversity, you'll likely be fine. At least for a while. But if you are very bothered, too bothered after you arrive, it wont likely get better. And thats your signal to think.