How to reject borrowing money

Hi there,
Here's another good one.  I've used this recently because it sounds genuine.,

I told the bloke (foreigner) that my ATM card is not working and I can only get cash over the counter with my Passport ID.  The passport "unfortunately" has been sent away to saigon for a Visa extension. Could be ages getting it back and I only have enough cash on hand till then.   

I also had a local person wanting to "borrow" $3,000.    That's nearly 2 years salary for a lot of people here.    I simply told this person that it would be irresponsible of me to put her in a position of Debt that would be a burden for her to repay.

I didn't need the thought of her losing sleep worrying about paying me the money back.

The look she gave me was priceless.😀

I spent a lot of years in the money lending game and reckon I've heard nearly every bullshit excuse for not honouring debts.   It's starting to pay off here eh...😀

Yogi007 wrote:

Hi there,

I also had a local person wanting to "borrow" $3,000.    That's nearly 2 years salary for a lot of people here.    I simply told this person that it would be irresponsible of me to put her in a position of Debt that would be a burden for her to repay.

I didn't need the thought of her losing sleep worrying about paying me the money back.

The look she gave me was priceless.😀

This is a golden one

I too spent my life in the money lending game , I've heard it all !!!! And more

Yogi007 wrote:

I also had a local person wanting to "borrow" $3,000.   
...

The look she gave me was priceless.😀

I read in Expat's FB group, a Vietnamese girl who borrowed money from an expat, then she blocked him from his Viber, FB,... She is not beautiful in my eyes, but she had an sexy avatar in Viber or somewhere I don't really remember . Then many people said, she borrowed money from many expats and locals, everyone she knew!

I still keep my ideas that never lend money to anyone that I don't know about them much. I only lend money to my colleagues sometimes, but not much.

You also need to be careful with people wanting to use your credit card for online shopping.
That's a big NO NO..     They make the request sound simple but things can turn to crap very quickly and you'll be left cleaning up the mess. 

Once they have your card details it's open slather.   Just tell them NO.. And that your card is blocked for online shopping services in SE Asia .   You can also say that Flight tickets can only be booked thru an account in your name only thru selected airlines you use.     A bit of bullshit won't hurt them.

Iv known guys here who wanted me to book flights for them , and later found out they are wanted criminals.   You don't want to be implicated with these guys.  If Federal police track them and find that an air ticket was bought with a credit card.......they have the authority to block that card.   That helps slow the crim down and your cards stopped.   Maybe expect a call from the Feds asking what your association is with these guys you bought the tickets for.   YOU then become a person of interest in an investigation and you've got the problem of getting your card reissued.   

So those simple little requests can turn nasty.    I'd know those guys for two years and saw them on a daily basis.    There's people here that aren't what they seem.

I've seen similar topics not only here but in other countries on this site. The borrower becomes friendly when they want to borrow. As soon as they got it, like magic they disappear

Best bet - don't lend money as this can lead to issues especially if you hardly know the person.

Brainstorm:)
It depends on the case u are in to borrow a satisfied reason.
2 millions are not a big mount u can consider your relation with the borrower how deep to consider.
Otherwise, when u lent but received back nothing later u will be aware he/she is not a good and trustful person. so the lost is worthy.
It is not foreigner is very frank so I think u should speak straightly to borrower u can not lend him/her.
or u can question the borrower:
1. what is purpose?
then considering in case he/she is in a bad situation that moment u give him/her a hand. ur very kind in his/her eye.
If not deep in this relation, u should consider she/he can pay u back or not then make decision
Gl.

When a person wants to borrow money, they will promises you the world. When it's time to pay it back, they treat you like a thief. This is usually the case most anywhere in the world.

In Viet Nam, if I want to give money, I just give it. When I do it's just small amounts and I see it as a gift. I know a loan will never be paid back and will only cause friction and resentment. Remember, if a person needs to borrow money, it's because they don't have it.

- @Adhome01

When a person wants to borrow money, they will promises you the world. When it's time to pay it back, they treat you like a thief. This is usually the case most anywhere in the world.

In Viet Nam, if I want to give money, I just give it. When I do it's just small amounts and I see it as a gift. I know a loan will never be paid back and will only cause friction and resentment. Remember, if a person needs to borrow money, it's because they don't have it.

- @Adhome01

what do you consider to be  'small amounts'?

- @vietnewby

When a person wants to borrow money, they will promises you the world. When it's time to pay it back, they treat you like a thief. This is usually the case most anywhere in the world.

In Viet Nam, if I want to give money, I just give it. When I do it's just small amounts and I see it as a gift. I know a loan will never be paid back and will only cause friction and resentment. Remember, if a person needs to borrow money, it's because they don't have it.

- @Adhome01

what do you consider to be  'small amounts'?

- @vietnewby

Thanks. I am curious to know would  79212723.46 dong be considered a lot?  I am a foreigner and rather ignorant to the relativity

Your chances of getting a reply to a 7-year old thread is low.

- @colinoscapee

When a person wants to borrow money, they will promises you the world. When it's time to pay it back, they treat you like a thief. This is usually the case most anywhere in the world.

In Viet Nam, if I want to give money, I just give it. When I do it's just small amounts and I see it as a gift. I know a loan will never be paid back and will only cause friction and resentment. Remember, if a person needs to borrow money, it's because they don't have it.

- @Adhome01

what do you consider to be  'small amounts'?

- @vietnewby

Thanks. I am curious to know would  79212723.46 dong be considered a lot?  I am a foreigner and rather ignorant to the relativity

Your chances of getting a reply to a 7-year old thread is low.

- @colinoscapee

- @vietnewby

@Andybris2020 thanks for response!

@Aidan in HCMC

thanks for reply - yes about $5000 AUS. 

For us it is a big thing. In Aust, we wouldn't dream of asking a friend for a loan unless we knew them a long time

and there was mutual trust etc.  It is almost considered an affront so it is interesting that it is quite common for Vietnamese to do this so  unabashed. 

- @vietnewby

I guess they figure, "Nothing ventured, nothing gained".

@Aidan in HCMC

thanks for reply - yes about $5000 AUS. 

For us it is a big thing. In Aust, we wouldn't dream of asking a friend for a loan unless we knew them a long time

and there was mutual trust etc.  It is almost considered an affront so it is interesting that it is quite common for Vietnamese to do this so  unabashed. 

- @vietnewby

I guess they figure, "Nothing ventured, nothing gained".

And I agree, $5,000 AUS is a substantial amount, certainly enough to strain any budding friendship.

And yes, your observation that this is common is correct.

Similarly, the VN have no hesitancy in asking what your income is, how much your sunglasses/watch/boots cost, and what your age is. The age thing is understandable, as knowing your age is necessary for them to address you correctly.

- @Aidan in HCMC

@Aidan in HCMC

thanks for reply - yes about $5000 AUS. 

For us it is a big thing. In Aust, we wouldn't dream of asking a friend for a loan unless we knew them a long time

and there was mutual trust etc.  It is almost considered an affront so it is interesting that it is quite common for Vietnamese to do this so  unabashed. 

- @vietnewby

I guess they figure, "Nothing ventured, nothing gained".

And I agree, $5,000 AUS is a substantial amount, certainly enough to strain any budding friendship.

And yes, your observation that this is common is correct.

Similarly, the VN have no hesitancy in asking what your income is, how much your sunglasses/watch/boots cost, and what your age is. The age thing is understandable, as knowing your age is necessary for them to address you correctly.

- @Aidan in HCMC

Thanks again. This person is independently very wealthy  so i knew he could and would repay, but i only knew him for 2 weeks at the time, and he was in a stuck situation.  I was taken aback when he asked as at the time as I didn't know about it being common for VN to ask for loans. Although shocked i was sympathetic.  As members commented earlier, VN won't take no for an answer and he persisted. My family wouldn't have a bar of it so my hands were tied anyway.  Unfortunately it has taken its toll on the friendship and even though he said he wouldn't blame me if i didn't give  it to him, he now blames me that i couldn't persuade the family so i guess he did afterall No win situation. hmm

@Aidan in HCMC

thanks for reply - yes about $5000 AUS. 

For us it is a big thing. In Aust, we wouldn't dream of asking a friend for a loan unless we knew them a long time

and there was mutual trust etc.  It is almost considered an affront so it is interesting that it is quite common for Vietnamese to do this so  unabashed. 

- @vietnewby

I guess they figure, "Nothing ventured, nothing gained".

And I agree, $5,000 AUS is a substantial amount, certainly enough to strain any budding friendship.

And yes, your observation that this is common is correct.

Similarly, the VN have no hesitancy in asking what your income is, how much your sunglasses/watch/boots cost, and what your age is. The age thing is understandable, as knowing your age is necessary for them to address you correctly.

- @Aidan in HCMC

Yes, we have helped others in need, but never with the idea that the goods, or dong were borrowed. Only given.

MAc

- @Mac68

@Aidan in HCMC

thanks for reply - yes about $5000 AUS. 

For us it is a big thing. In Aust, we wouldn't dream of asking a friend for a loan unless we knew them a long time

and there was mutual trust etc.  It is almost considered an affront so it is interesting that it is quite common for Vietnamese to do this so  unabashed. 

- @vietnewby

I guess they figure, "Nothing ventured, nothing gained".

And I agree, $5,000 AUS is a substantial amount, certainly enough to strain any budding friendship.

And yes, your observation that this is common is correct.

Similarly, the VN have no hesitancy in asking what your income is, how much your sunglasses/watch/boots cost, and what your age is. The age thing is understandable, as knowing your age is necessary for them to address you correctly.

- @Aidan in HCMC

Thanks again. This person is independently very wealthy  so i knew he could and would repay, but i only knew him for 2 weeks at the time, and he was in a stuck situation.  I was taken aback when he asked as at the time as I didn't know about it being common for VN to ask for loans. Although shocked i was sympathetic.  As members commented earlier, VN won't take no for an answer and he persisted. My family wouldn't have a bar of it so my hands were tied anyway.  Unfortunately it has taken its toll on the friendship and even though he said he wouldn't blame me if i didn't give  it to him, he now blames me that i couldn't persuade the family so i guess he did afterall No win situation. hmm

- @vietnewby

Hi Don,,,,

- @Andybris2020

@Aidan in HCMC

thanks for reply - yes about $5000 AUS. 

For us it is a big thing. In Aust, we wouldn't dream of asking a friend for a loan unless we knew them a long time

and there was mutual trust etc.  It is almost considered an affront so it is interesting that it is quite common for Vietnamese to do this so  unabashed. 

- @vietnewby

I guess they figure, "Nothing ventured, nothing gained".

And I agree, $5,000 AUS is a substantial amount, certainly enough to strain any budding friendship.

And yes, your observation that this is common is correct.

Similarly, the VN have no hesitancy in asking what your income is, how much your sunglasses/watch/boots cost, and what your age is. The age thing is understandable, as knowing your age is necessary for them to address you correctly.

- @Aidan in HCMC

Thanks again. This person is independently very wealthy  so i knew he could and would repay, but i only knew him for 2 weeks at the time, and he was in a stuck situation.  I was taken aback when he asked as at the time as I didn't know about it being common for VN to ask for loans. Although shocked i was sympathetic.  As members commented earlier, VN won't take no for an answer and he persisted. My family wouldn't have a bar of it so my hands were tied anyway.  Unfortunately it has taken its toll on the friendship and even though he said he wouldn't blame me if i didn't give  it to him, he now blames me that i couldn't persuade the family so i guess he did afterall No win situation. hmm

- @vietnewby

On the contrary, you've definitely won this one.

If you can't see that in retrospect, you are likely to repeat the history which is failing in its attempt to teach you.

(PS: Did you truly come onto this forum to ask the question while being clueless as to the VND~AUD exchange rate? Perhaps that's a clue as to why you need permission from your family to loan your own money? And how did your family know it was too much money without knowing the exchange rate? I suspect a troll...)

- @OceanBeach92107

I did not come onto this forum to enquire about exchange rate of VND-AUD -  I  already knew the exchange rate.  If you read the original you will see that I asked what was considered a reasonable amount in VN to be asked for a loan in response to another member saying they would give small loans and I wanted to know what was considered a small loan,  because I am naïve about the customs over there, and wondered if that was a reasonable amount that's all.   My family  didn't know  the exchange rate but didn't want to give even a cent to this person.. as previously mentioned, in our country it is considered an affront to ask a friend who we barely know for a loan, but if it is normal in VN then that makes it more excusable that's all. 

@Aidan in HCMC

thanks for reply - yes about $5000 AUS. 

For us it is a big thing. In Aust, we wouldn't dream of asking a friend for a loan unless we knew them a long time

and there was mutual trust etc.  It is almost considered an affront so it is interesting that it is quite common for Vietnamese to do this so  unabashed. 

- @vietnewby

I guess they figure, "Nothing ventured, nothing gained".

And I agree, $5,000 AUS is a substantial amount, certainly enough to strain any budding friendship.

And yes, your observation that this is common is correct.

Similarly, the VN have no hesitancy in asking what your income is, how much your sunglasses/watch/boots cost, and what your age is. The age thing is understandable, as knowing your age is necessary for them to address you correctly.

- @Aidan in HCMC

Yes, we have helped others in need, but never with the idea that the goods, or dong were borrowed. Only given.

MAc

- @Mac68

I haven't lent money since my early 20s.  Instead I give it, if I consider it worthwhile, so that I don't have to worry about someone owing me money.  It's just money, after all.

@thecoolchazza I don't lend money, but I'm a business person so I find a way to make it benefit us both. I usually get them to find me clients and if those clients will 100 percent generate me money I'll break them off a percentage of the money. That way you're not giving anything to anyone with no return. It has to be a two way street because majority of people will take that money and ruin your friendship over it.