Feeling overwhelmed
Last activity 14 October 2014 by Stevehigh
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Hi All,
We arrived in POM on Wed for 12 months for our first ever overseas job. I've brought my husband and 2 kids with us, and I'm feeling completely overwhelmed. My mothering instincts are in overdrive worrying about them.
I have to give credit to my employer as they have been very helpful to us settling in.
As each day comes, my anxiety levels are dropping slowly.
Is this feeling normal? Have I scarred my kids by bringing them here. Are there any other working mums out there that can relate to how I'm feeling?
I'm telling myself that once we get into a routine with school and work that things will start to settle down.
Please tell me that what I'm feeling is normal and that it will pass
. That's completely normal. But of course you'll be extra sensitive being a working mother. Give it a month and once you guys get into the routine and make social contacts, it will start to feel comfortable.
Kids nowadays are far more resilient and sophisticated than we adults give them credit for. Certainly much moreso than we were at their age.
Don't worry, your kids will probably have much less difficulty in making the adaptation to living in your new host country than you and your husband are going to have.
Before you know it, they're probably going to be helping the two of you adapt, or pushing you to do so more quickly. Funny how that goes, but as an educator I can tell you it's true.
Cheers,
William James Woodward, Expat-blog Experts Team
Hi Practicali,
Welcome to PNG. What you are experiencing is called "culture shock." Missionaries going into other countries get some training and mentoring in this area to help prepare them. You probably didn't have that opportunity. So first, what you are experiencing is pretty normal as far as emotions are concerned. Don't be too hard on yourself and try to relax some.
As far as your kids are concerned, teach them appropriate security in a frank and honest way. They will pickup on your emotions and attitudes and mirror them. If you are freaked out they will be freaked out. Better to settle into a practical understanding and routine that you become comfortable with.
Give the children as much normalcy as possible. Vision City Mall is a safe place if you keep an eye on the kids - a nice theater too. Waterfront mall also makes for a nice safe outing. other activities include the Botanical Gardens and the Adventure park for day or afternoon trips. For a nice get-away you can drive about 30 KM from Port Moresby out Maggi Highway to a little beach side resort call (March Girls) for swimming, lunch or dinner. It costs K6 per person (by the way if you go to March Girls you will pass by the City Mission New Life Skills Training Center Farm where I live. If you let me know you are coming you can stop in and I will give you a tour of the farm and let the kids pet the animals.you are experiencing is somewhat normal. Purposing to relax and create as much normalcy as possible will shorten the culture shock period a lot.
And last but least,make as many friends as possible with both Expats and locals. Create some relationships outside of your work environment too. That will help a lot. If you are in Port Moresby please feel free to contact my wife and I. I have an office in Koki district which is by Ela beach and the town area of POM. By the way, we're Americans. You didn't say what country you were from.
Steve and Brooke
All the best with your families transition practicali. What a really lovely response from Steve and Brooke especially with the offer of a farm tour as well. .
Suejuls,
Thanks for the Kudos. We would be love to connect with anyone -- new or seasoned -- in POM. steve@stevehighlander.com
Thank you for your responses, and a big thank you to Steve for your invitation. We hope to take you up on it soon.
Another week down and we're adjusting more and more each day.
Steve, we're from Australia