Marriage

I have a problem figuring out the best way to get married.   My bf is from Lebanon,  but lives and works in Saudi Arabia.  I am from the US but live in China.   He is Muslim.  I have no religion.   Trying to figure out how to work this is giving me a headache.   Any ideas?

Bestest way, i think...
Let him go to China...and get married there...and it's best for you to embrace Islam... :D  (but the question on how to live your lives as a couple will be up to you guys!)

you both should live in a same country and get married and you should embrace Islam only if you truly believe in it Not just because of marriage. So i would suggest you to first study Islam by Qur'an and from a Muslim and then if you feel its authentic then embrace Islam.
All the best.

In my opinion you should get married in Lebanon as it is his home country and it will be much easier for you and later he can bring you in Saudia, but point of concern is your status "  I have no religion" because a muslim can marry only with a Christian and Jewish girl according to the rules of Islam, rest up to him that if he follows this rule of not.

Yes, I have been thinking this is the best option.   I was raised Christian, so I assume that I am technically considered to be Christian.   I meant more that I don't mind converting if I have to.

sth7876 wrote:

In my opinion you should get married in Lebanon as it is his home country and it will be much easier for you and later he can bring you in Saudia, but point of concern is your status "  I have no religion" because a muslim can marry only with a Christian and Jewish girl according to the rules of Islam, rest up to him that if he follows this rule of not.


I muslim can marry only a muslim girl as per the rules of islam.

syedkamran84 wrote:
sth7876 wrote:

In my opinion you should get married in Lebanon as it is his home country and it will be much easier for you and later he can bring you in Saudia, but point of concern is your status "  I have no religion" because a muslim can marry only with a Christian and Jewish girl according to the rules of Islam, rest up to him that if he follows this rule of not.


I muslim can marry only a muslim girl as per the rules of islam.


No dude, if you are going to talk about religion, know your facts.  A Muslim man is allowed to marry "women of The Book", it is written right there in the Quran.  And that means Christians and Jews.

As for the OP, the easiest way is to get married in Lebanon, because it is the closest to both of you.  Or, get married in the USA.  Can't do it in Saudi.  As for religion, that's up to you.  No body can or should coerce you.

Besides being a Muslim since birth i am also doing a diploma course on Islamic studies and i am 100% sure that a Muslim cannot marry a non-Muslim.

"O ye who believe! When there come to you believing women refugees, examine (and test) them: Allah knows best as to their Faith: if ye ascertain that they are Believers, then send them not back to the Unbelievers.
"""They are not lawful (wives) for the Unbelievers, nor are the (Unbelievers) lawful (husbands) for them."""
But pay the Unbelievers what they have spent (on their dower), and there will be no blame on you if ye marry them on payment of their dower to them. But hold not to the guardianship of unbelieving women: ask for what ye have spent on their dowers, and let the (Unbelievers) ask for what they have spent (on the dowers of women who come over to you). Such is the command of Allah. He judges (with justice) between you. And Allah is Full of Knowledge and Wisdom. {chapter 60:10 of Qur'an).

Do you even know what that verse is talking about?

In Islamic law, if a non-Muslim woman is married to a non-Muslim, and she converts to Islam, the marriage is suspended until her husband converts to Islam. She could leave the non-Muslim husband and marry a Muslim one.  If the non-Muslim husband does convert a new marriage is not needed.

Again, as I said, Muslim men can marry Christians and Jews (but Muslim women can only Muslim men).  Learn a bit more, and then respond.  Bonus points if you find the verse where it says that.

Trapezius wrote:

Do you even know what that verse is talking about?

In Islamic law, if a non-Muslim woman is married to a non-Muslim, and she converts to Islam, the marriage is suspended until her husband converts to Islam. She could leave the non-Muslim husband and marry a Muslim one.  If the non-Muslim husband does convert a new marriage is not needed.

Again, as I said, Muslim men can marry Christians and Jews (but Muslim women can only Muslim men).  Learn a bit more, and then respond.  Bonus points if you find the verse where it says that.


Trust me bro its not possible. I mean i cannot marry a non-muslim girl until she converts to Islam. i am damn sure about it.

Instead of being "damn sure" about it and arguing back and forth, how about you do some research and find it in the Quran to end the discussion forever?  I mean, it is shocking that you don't know this.  This isn't some arcane ruling that many people don't know about, rather, every single Muslim I have ever known, knows this.  It is a well known fact, and even many non Muslims know about it and use it to ask why it is permissible for a Muslim man to marry Christians and Jews, but not permissible for a Muslim woman.

Seriously, I have never come across a Muslim who doesn't know about this.  Like I said, it SAYS THAT IN THE QURAN.  Find it.

And as a supplementary proof, if it wasnt allowed, why would they allow Muslim men to marry Christian women in Saudi Arabia?  It happens here in shariah courts!!!

Learn about Islam. I'm sure you will find safety and happiness in this world and the hereafter
I'm ready for anything to help

My research backs you up. In Lebanon at least, a Muslim man can marry a Christian or Jewish woman. The woman does not have to convert.

Yes
Islam allows a Muslim man to marry a woman of Christian or Jewish
Because Islam, Christianity and Judaism is a divine religions.

They might be divine religions when they were revealed but now they are corrupted by human intervention and that's why Qur'an was revealed. Qur'an clearly says that those books were from True Almighty but priests and rabbis made changes in them and thus corrupted the books.
Hence Christianity and Judaism are not considered divine religions now and it is considered as duty of every Muslim to call people of those religions to Islam because Almighty doesn't want them to go to hell.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vPrMkJHOhME

See this video it will clear all your doubts and watch it till end. this video is by a Famous Muslim scholar Zakir Hussain.

Muslim is allowed to marry a Christian or Jewish lady only if she believes in ONE GOD and believes in Qur'an being the final revelation of the Almighty.

Best way is to go to China...both of them get married then he can issue a visa for you

Dear syedkamran84
I know that religion must follow now is to Islam. The book is a divine right is the Holy Qur'an.
The Qur'an tell us about Jesus Christ and the Prophet Moses, the Jews. And tell us that they had distorted the holy books (the Torah and the Bible)
But the tolerance of Islam, it does not prohibit the marriage and eating with a Christian or a Jew, because they believe in the existence of God. Islam forbids the marriage of the infidel who does not believe in the existence of God (such as Buddhist, Hindus, etc. ...)

me.manhood wrote:

Dear syedkamran84
I know that religion must follow now is to Islam. The book is a divine right is the Holy Qur'an.
The Qur'an tell us about Jesus Christ and the Prophet Moses, the Jews. And tell us that they had distorted the holy books (the Torah and the Bible)
But the tolerance of Islam, it does not prohibit the marriage and eating with a Christian or a Jew, because they believe in the existence of God. Islam forbids the marriage of the infidel who does not believe in the existence of God (such as Buddhist, Hindus, etc. ...)


Please the you tube link which i have posted it will clear all your doubts.

RueEr
To make sure .. Is your question by religion or by the consent of states Systems

Hi,

Could we please stop those off topic posts or we will moderate them?
Religious debates are out of Expat.com's scope.
You might want discussing in private.

Thanks
Armand
Expat.com Team

Armand wrote:

Hi,

Could we please stop those off topic posts or we will moderate them?
Religious debates are out of Expat.com's scope.
You might want discussing in private.

Thanks
Armand
Expat.com Team


Okay.

Armand wrote:

Hi,

Could we please stop those off topic posts or we will moderate them?
Religious debates are out of Expat.com's scope.
You might want discussing in private.

Thanks
Armand
Expat.com Team


Well Said Mr. Armand

My question was primarily about the ease of acquiring visas and the ability to marry in a given country.  It appears as if I can travel much easier than he can, except to KSA...  I never realized how difficult it is to get into the US. (grin)

:up:

Trapezius wrote:

Do you even know what that verse is talking about?

In Islamic law, if a non-Muslim woman is married to a non-Muslim, and she converts to Islam, the marriage is suspended until her husband converts to Islam. She could leave the non-Muslim husband and marry a Muslim one.  If the non-Muslim husband does convert a new marriage is not needed.

Again, as I said, Muslim men can marry Christians and Jews (but Muslim women can only Muslim men).  Learn a bit more, and then respond.  Bonus points if you find the verse where it says that.

u better change you institute you are doing diploma from bro..  :dumbom:

syedkamran84 wrote:

Besides being a Muslim since birth i am also doing a diploma course on Islamic studies and i am 100% sure that a Muslim cannot marry a non-Muslim.

"O ye who believe! When there come to you believing women refugees, examine (and test) them: Allah knows best as to their Faith: if ye ascertain that they are Believers, then send them not back to the Unbelievers.
"""They are not lawful (wives) for the Unbelievers, nor are the (Unbelievers) lawful (husbands) for them."""
But pay the Unbelievers what they have spent (on their dower), and there will be no blame on you if ye marry them on payment of their dower to them. But hold not to the guardianship of unbelieving women: ask for what ye have spent on their dowers, and let the (Unbelievers) ask for what they have spent (on the dowers of women who come over to you). Such is the command of Allah. He judges (with justice) between you. And Allah is Full of Knowledge and Wisdom. {chapter 60:10 of Qur'an).

RueEr wrote:

My question was primarily about the ease of acquiring visas and the ability to marry in a given country.  It appears as if I can travel much easier than he can, except to KSA...  I never realized how difficult it is to get into the US. (grin)


As an American, you can pretty much get a visa on arrival in nearly all countries in the world, and on the flip side, he would need a visa before he travels for nearly all countries in the world.

Best options are the US Embassy/Consulate in China, or in Lebanon.  Lebanon, obviously you can get married, but still inquire about all the documents that will be required, and if there is a minimum period you have to stay before you can apply for a marriage license.  If Lebanon is too risky now for you, then inquire if it is possible to get married in a US diplomatic mission in China.  Again, call and inquire about documents, or search on the US state department website.

A third option, which I would recommend, is what I did.  Get married in Mauritius, you will never regret it.  One of the most beautiful places on earth, and you can have your honeymoon there as well.  It is extremely easy to get married there, all you need to bring are passports and birth certificates, that's it.  And, the best thing, you can get married the day after you arrive.  Many of the countries we looked at when shopping for a country for marriage required police clearance certificates from our home countries, and also had a 2-3 week residency requirement before a marriage license could be applied for.  Maldives is another alternative, and that will be like halfway between both of you.

BTW, there is definitely a visa to enter the US for marriage with a US citizen, isn't there?  If so, why don't you do that?  Or is it too difficult to get that visa?  Apply, you never know.

Good luck!

Thanks. That info is very useful.   China is out simply because it is next to impossible for 2 non Chinese to marry there.  The US does have fiancé visas, but they are difficult to get and take a long time.   I think that I will look into your suggestions.

Not even inside the US Embassy in China?  Embassies of some countries around the world offer that service to their nationals.  Don't know about US embassies.

Turkey and Cyprus had a 21 day residency requirement when we looked back in 2007, but check online again, as those are also beautiful countries.  I believe Mauritius (and Maldives) are ideal.  Maldives is more expensive, and is all beach.  Mauritius has amazing beaches, but also has lots of other activities to do and sites to visit.  Seychelles could be another option.

Some info for you:

http://www.emirates-holidays.com/englis … /mauritiushttp://www.emirates-holidays.com/englis … ius/hotelshttp://www.emirates-holidays.com/system … ritius.pdf

Info about Maldives and Seychelles is also on the site.  Get an Emirates airline package with hotel, as that will save you a lot of money.  When we went, each of us paid $50 per night for the double room on top of our ticket as part of the package.  When we got there, I inquired about the room price in which we were staying, and the hotel's rate was $250 per night for the room.  So, that $250 room, we got it for $100 as part of the package.  They have packages available for several hotels in each of those countries.  You can get visa on arrival, but confirm it.  He will have to apply for a visa directly by fax, as they don't really have embassies anywhere.  Google for the government's website, and the procedure is there.

Good luck, and you are welcome!

Well, as a diplomat to China,  I am pretty sure that the US Consulate doesn't do marriages. ..

All the best RueEr. Hope u achieve ur goal easily.
And congrats on wedding.
And plz invite us all also to ur wedding. I love cakes.

Lol.  Will do.

Hi

yes you can do one thing to be with your bf

1- if you love him just change your Religion now to be muslim
2- go with your bf to any country work and live there

this is my idea to you

nagaso wrote:

1- if you love him just change your Religion now to be muslim
2- go with your bf to any country work and live there


So, one should change their religion because they love someone?  Is that the reason people should become Muslim?  And then, after she becomes Muslim for the sake of a man, your next advice to her is to cohabit with him, without getting married?

Interesting :rolleyes:

Syedkamran, you should check by yourself so for sure you will be convinced : it is said in the beginning of Surat 5 El Nour. It happens to everybody to be wrong sometimes.

Anyway, I am in a complicate situation too. My bf is only 24 so there is just no way for us to get the authorization to get married. If anyone of you could give me some advice on how to get it, I would appreciate a lot.

tripplea wrote:

He is right. Muslim men  can marry Christian women. :)


cc

hi am rose from philippine im working here in riyadh i have some question because i plan to get married my bf egyptian in makahmah and i converted already in muslim. but i married in my country judge or (kasalang bayan )  i ask if we have case .i need your opinion.


hoping for kind consideration,

thank you and best regard for all the staff and member this sites.
im interesting :)

hi marygracee1111,

marriage is a legal binding bet. man and woman, either husband or wife may file a lawsuit in case the other did re-marry without permission of the other, in our country it can be solved by filing legal separation, or annulment, or marriage "voids" under the family code of the Philippines (if you were both under 18 y/o that time or the official is unauthorized to conduct marriage ceremony), there's another case, if both have no contact for 7 yrs. long and there will be a witness to testify, marriage can be void but it must be decided in court.

kasalang bayan is authorized and performed by priest or municipal officer, it is indeed legal and with more power, i assume municipal officers and registrars were also there witnessing?, i'm sure your paper is somewhere in nso. 

converting religion to islam does not exempt you from your husband, take responsibility to break the paper and have peace of mind entering into another paper, alright? because marriages in consulates were posted in webs, see if nobody would appeal to stop it?! good luck!

good luck to you also RueEr  :D

Difficult question i must say :-P