women in Puerto Rico

Although as you say racism is everywhere my personal experience is that most people in PR are no racists.
In many families you'll find people with different skin colors and they just accept another like it should be. I have f.i. a black sister in law and a bunch of "latino" looking in laws but also whites. We are one happy bunch and race is no issue.

I'm pretty sure that you'll experience (a lot) less racism here than in the mainland,

Gary is right. Unfortunately racism does exist everywhere, on all sides, even in Puerto Rico. However, one thing that has always impressed me about PR, even before I moved there  was that no matter how light or how dark the people from PR are, you are still Puerto Rican..It's a commonality that everyone shares. Mostly because Puerto Ricans are primarily made up of 3 different groups, Taino (indigenous natives), Africans and Spaniards.There also have been Irish colonies at one time on the island. So within any given family there can be a wide variety of how people look. It's just a matter of which genes they inherit at birth. My wife's Father was definitely a prime example of what the Tainos looked like. My wife on the other hand is light skinned with Taino eyes but definitely has that Puerto Rican look. Our daughter is blonde with green eyes and very light skinned. She looks strictly Anglo.  Her children could turn out to have darker skin and jet black hair. You just never know. That is one of the positives about living in PR. It's been my experience that there is considerably less racism there. I appreciated it greatly because where I had moved from, racism ran deep. I was even mistaken for a Puerto Rican many times when I lived there and I have grey hair and blue eyes. As far as figuring out the women there, I can't help you much. I've been married to one for 11 years and I'm still trying to figure her out. Despite the fact that you hear often how friendly the Puerto Ricans are, you will run into  some neighborhoods that won't like you no matter what color or sex you are. If you are not Puerto Rican they don't want anything to do with you. It doesn't happen often but it does exist. Best of luck to you. The key is to open your mind and have patience and try to learn and understand the culture. It's very different than what you are used to and you will eventually have to learn to embrace it to some degree.

I live in Rincon (25 minutes south of Aguadilla) with wife, Karen. We are both white and from NJ. The only prejudice I'm aware of is in the Rincon public schools where a dark skinned child will be picked on because she is dark (happens to neighbor's kid). This is not relevant to you since you are not a kid in public school but I thought to include this observation.

I am guessing that if you give it time women will begin relating to you positively. I am sometimes surprised that someone I perceived as unfriendly becomes friendly if I make an effort to reach out to them. Let people get to know you. Do you speak Spanish? If not this may be an impediment in some cases. I find that giving things to people helps - if you make something to eat share it with someone you are aquainted with and want to know better. Smile when you see people and greet them in Spanish. Also if you get bad vibes from someone don't always assume it's because of  something you did; everyone has some things going on in their life that you aren't aware of and those things may account that. I hope you are getting my drift. And I know it is scary moving to a place that is so different from where you came (I assume this is so). By the way it's a good idea to meet and socialize with expats too (technically we Americans are not expats since PR is in effect the United States). We have a large and active expat community here in Rincon. But don't get me wrong, I (and my wife) do not just hang around with expats (that would drive us nuts). We are the only gringos in our neighborhood and we have made good friends here.

When you move to PR gives us a ring if you up to that. We can get together for a meal and talk about PR. My phone number is 908.581.1537 and email address is victorlglass@gmail.com.

Hello...I have a home in Puerto Rico and have met many people.  My husband is Puerto Rican but I am not.  I am white and I find that people can be standoffish until they meet my husband.  I do find that Puerto Rican women can be more reserved with me but I attributed it to the fact that I don't speak Spanish.  No matter I do feel a difference.  My niece gave me some advice - Puerto Rican women really like to help so ask for their help and advice and they warm up.  It really does work.  Maybe we are afraid of what we don't understand.  Good luck and don't give up.

Thanks everyone for your support and comments.  We are so looking forward to this change in our lives.  PR is the place we want to be.  We both speak a little Spanish but plan to take lessons and become conversant.  I am so jealous that you are all there already and are enjoying sun, warm beaches...and mofongo (tostones, too)! 

PS - thanks Victor for your contact info, I will most definitely save it and get in touch when we move.