Living Safely in Thailand

It's simple, in this case I would not stay in a house. The best living situation would be to rent a condo, with high quality security. Make friends with the security on site, explain to the management office your concerns. A gift to them of cookies or cake can go a long ways to help provide them to looking after your safety.  Patrick

I fell very safe here in Thailand. So for me it is "OverKill"

But yea, Even in Thailand bad thing can happened,  Like all over the world.

Maybe ask you wife about being with the kids for 4 weeks when you work.
She might want to be closer to some family for help and support in daily life ?
And like many others Thai, She have family many place in Thailand.

I prefer house over Condo, The security in many condo is a joke, And i do think it is "False" security.
Many condo the noise can be a pain, Special in the newer build Condo tower i live in.
Not so much in the "old" Condo i live in.

At a small Soi, People stick together, Look out for stranger, interferes if they see someone they dont know, or think look like "Danger" to the neighborhood.

Like when the wife and i was away, There was a problem with our water tank, And water starte come out, And out to the Soi, So people can see it.

A neighbor closed for the water at the street, jump over the wall, look inside the tank.
See that the item that get push up and water stop have broken.
Fix it for us before we return, So we didnt have to come back, And do that our self.
Yes, I love my Thai neighbors.

And many house have area around the house for the kids to play and have fun.
And room for a family dog, Maybe ?

Kindly.

Thanks for the response. This was my line of thinking but perhaps a house within a block of lots with security gate etc.

Neighborhood watch. Community watch. Increasing danger is not just in Thailand. It's everywhere in this sad old world of ours. Worldly common sense. Sadly, that picturesque scenario of the house in the countryside on the country road, which is where I grew up and played in the forest, has changed.
     But, hmmm, come to think of it, I had a big dog as a companion to hike with when I was a little kid. Gentle. Loving. But would attack on command. Saved me once from a big bad gang that tried to drown me in a swimming hole just for fun.
     Maybe have two (2) trained guard dogs and one (1) little yapping watchdog that acts as a house alarm system. Completes the family. But these puppies need their exercise, their walks, their toilet, their exploring, good food, clean water and medical attention. 
     Depending on where you live, dogs can be great security. However, there are some nasty dog-napping gangs who poach and who would like to steal the dogs along with the kids.
     Tough, decision. Bottom line: Safety first. Hopefully you can find a way to work closer to home and rest easy.   dcb

My take on this is that the MIL simply doesn't want you living far away or investing money anywhere other than in the immediate area where the family lives and can benefit from that investment.  I would emphasize what you and your wife want but that is often easier said than done.

A nice condo or gated community should provide a buffer between you and the most desperate members of society.  I have personally never felt unsafe here in Thailand and I have not led a sheltered existence.  That said, I have known a few people who got themselves in real trouble, even dead, because they saw themselves as invulnerable.  You sound sensible so you shouldn't have any problem finding a nice place for you and your family to live.