Please help with my resolve to relocate

I'm impressed with the variety of locations members show here.  Nothing like the Chapala/Ajijic dullard's forum. 

I have lived in these states:
BC
BCS
Oaxaca
Chiapas
Michoacan
Jalisco
Guerrero
Tamaulipas

But for highway travel these are the only ones I know.

Too bad Uruapan Michoacan has gone narco war.  That's where I want to be.

My creature comfort needs:
Relatively fresh air, no smog.
Little tourism.
In or near a city with a progressive music scene.
Decent roadways.
Salt of the Earth people.
Good elevation. 
Street life.

What I don't need:
Walmart
Shopping glitter.
Strict police procedures.
High traffic. 
High humidity.
Rent that exceeds 3000P.

I come to you because Internet searching and looking at photos that somehow haven't the clarity to discern the mosquitoes won't do it. 

Thanks in advance!