Portuguese

Hey, Lcarp!
How and where you learn Portuguese depends a lot on your motivation, dedication and goals, and to an extent on your resources.
When I absolutely had to learn to speak German, my employer sprang for private lessons at Berlitz, three times a week, plus recorded exercises to work on at home -- cassettes, in those olden days.  After two months, I was able to hold my own in Germany unassisted -- and even received compliments on my accent.  Because of their shared Latin content, Portuguese is easier for English speakers to learn than German,  and Berlitz offers Portuguese in Michigan, so I don't doubt that in a couple of months, you could be conversational and on your way to fluency.  It will cost you time and money, but the time you're going to have to spend anyway.
If you're looking for self-teaching, there's always Rosetta Stone.  I know as much about them as you do -- that they must have an enormous advertising budget!  But, where there's all that smoke, there may be some fire.
If you're looking for online learning, the best course I know is "Learn Portuguese with Rafa", by Rafael Tavares.  Rafa has developed some neat looking learning aids, and his knowledge of the language is DEEP -- we've exchanged emails on some ridiculously intricate (to most people, anyway) grammar questions, and I've found him to be a true expert, as well as totally engaged, engaging, and very responsive.  Rafa is Portuguese, so you may learn some pronunciations that will make your wife and her family smile.  But he's always careful to distinguish between European and Brazilian usage when they're different (which isn't as often as some would tell you), and he won't steer you wrong.
I enjoy Brazilian Gringo's site:  I like his style, and his takes on Brazilian culture in general.  He makes some recommendations on language learning, that might be worth checking out as part of your research.
All the best to you.

Thank you for the info but at my age 67 it's getting harder and harder to learn! Lol