Absolutely Anything Else

MOHCTEP wrote:

Shame people let others linger and deteriorate to that state before their loved-one is dead. What is the point? Fear? Lack of options? Religiosity?
End of life is one of the major events people have the least control of. Few prepare for it, even fewer have plans on how they want to die. As if everyone were hoping for dying in their sleep at an age of 99-not gonna happen.  Amazing really. There are options now in many EU countries and some US states. People don't have to go through torturous decline and yet few take action and make definitive plans on how long they should be left to suffer .....
I guess until government steps in and offers definitive choices nothing will happen in most countries.
End of life care currently is causing huge expense to the family : emotionally and financially and to add to that huge expense to the healthcare and tax base of the nation. And all of it needlessly and completely to no benefit of everyone involved.

Controversial stuff.  Sure, Netherlands and Belgium allow it.  But he was in the UK and there was nothing anyone could do.  Certainly no religious reasons in the way as my bro was a devout (??) atheist. Very much a non-believer. He wasn't capable of determining his future any more. He was his brain and his brain became a jumbled mass of uselessly connected cells.

He was very well educated, multiple degrees, very senior in the business he worked in and internationally known by many in his field.  He was very used to organising his family and himself so at first, he treated it as  project. He was quick to sign over a Power of Attorney but this doesn't extend to giving relatives authority to indulge in euthanasia. That's still illegal in many places. Anyone helping him could have been charged with murder or manslaughter.

We did have a discussion about taking him to Switzerland on a final road trip but he would not have been able to answer any questions or signal his desires. He was too far gone by about the 6 or 7th month.   Eventually he was hallucinating, behaving oddly and saying strange irrational things. He eventually ended up in a hospice (end of life care) where he stayed for a couple of weeks.

As for the healthcare towards the end, the universal public system in the UK, where he ended up, was  absolutely superb and indeed free at the point of delivery. It cost nothing at all.  Given the amount of tax he paid in his life and after, he certainly got some eway to his money's worth but even the largest amount of money in tax couldn't say his life unfortunately.

I had the opportunity to spend several weeks with him during his decline and we had some great chats. All he wanted was normality, even though our individual ideas of normality at that point were  different.  I wouldn't have had that opportunity if he'd taken the other way out.

fluffy2560 wrote:

I don't really know what this daydreaming thing is with the Hungarians.  I notice that some of the HU relatives do this sometimes.  People here often say their "feet are firmly on the ground" but that's in conflict with what they say. 

I think it's like some kind of prayer or wishing or more positively reflections on what is going on which they then share with anyone around at that moment.   People have always had all sorts of "strange" thoughts on a day to day basis but they usually keep them to themselves.  It's almost like public musing but it gets presented or re-oriented or passed on as truths or similar and then turns into unsubstantiated facts. 

Seems to be peculiar to here - I don't know if any other nations do it.

I have noticed the same.

Using Freudian terms, one might classify your description as weak Super Egos, and over active Ids. But that is of course very over simplified.

klsallee wrote:

fluffy2560 wrote:

I don't really know what this daydreaming thing is with the Hungarians.  I notice that some of the HU relatives do this sometimes.  People here often say their "feet are firmly on the ground" but that's in conflict with what they say. 

I think it's like some kind of prayer or wishing or more positively reflections on what is going on which they then share with anyone around at that moment.   People have always had all sorts of "strange" thoughts on a day to day basis but they usually keep them to themselves.  It's almost like public musing but it gets presented or re-oriented or passed on as truths or similar and then turns into unsubstantiated facts. 

Seems to be peculiar to here - I don't know if any other nations do it.

I have noticed the same.

Using Freudian terms, one might classify your description as weak Super Egos, and over active Ids. But that is of course very over simplified.

Dunno about Freud. Some of his theories have come in for criticism.

fluffy2560 wrote:

Dunno about Freud. Some of his theories have come in for criticism.

He should have been given the Freudian Pink Slip.

SimonTrew wrote:

fluffy2560 wrote:

Dunno about Freud. Some of his theories have come in for criticism.

He should have been given the Freudian Pink Slip.

Working nights?   

I think Freud has been discredited quite a bit and others have been given higher praise.   

Every time I think of Freud, I always think of Clement Freud and that dog food advert on TV.

I wonder what Freud senior would have thought of that association.

fluffy2560 wrote:

Working nights?

I tend to keep odd hours like, it seems, you do. Actually this week I have been working on the house from about 5 or 6am to about 10 or 11pm at least, and then need a few hours to wind down. But I don't usually need about more than 4 hours' sleep a night. I never use an alarm clock, I always just wake up quite early and go to bed quite late. The Hungarian habit of being tucked up before 9pm is quite odd to me, but then they tend to have earlier starts at work than British people do. Still...

fluffy2560 wrote:

I think Freud has been discredited quite a bit and others have been given higher praise.   

Every time I think of Freud, I always think of Clement Freud and that dog food advert on TV.

I wonder what Freud senior would have thought of that association.

He would have called it Freudian Slop.

And tell me, Mr. Fluffy, why do you think of Freud so often and what do you think that may mean?

fluffy2560 wrote:

Dunno about Freud. Some of his theories have come in for criticism.

I was not actually promoting the Freudian school. I simply said "Using Freudian terms", mostly because most people have heard of the Id, Ego and Superego and know what they mean, so could conceptualize an idea about the issue you raised.

All branches of psychology have their share of criticism. And others are simply the favorite flavor this month. Feel free to select your own school to summarize.

It's not easy to care for the dying .
My cousin moved my aunt into her home and took care of her for over 2 years .
My auntie had breast cancer which quickly spread through her body. Bed ridden for years.
My cousin took a class in home health care so the state would at least pay her a bit since she had to quit her normal job to care for her mom, of course it was allot less money then her normal job was but she wouldn't hear of her mom being mistreated in a home .
sadly ATM this same cuz is undergoing chemo for breast cancer herself. Her older bro and his wife just moved into her home from SE Asia to help her out

Caring for a very ill loved one really makes you see what you're made of. I am sort of made of mush.
On my mom's death bed 5 of her 6 kids and their spouses all either drove 10 hours to N. Ca. or flew up.
She was found in a coma after 3 days... Step-dad was on a drunk and "forgot" to call for help for 3 days.
at least that was his story.
Mom had advanced breast cancer, knew how ill she was and out of the blue just sold her house, gave everything away and told us she needed some peace and quiet.
I called her up at least 5 or more times a week and she swore to me she was ok.
I had taken a trip to Vegas with my husband and friends for New Years so missed 2 days of calling her up. That's when she crashed and burnt.
So coma time although I swear she could hear us, she squeezed my and and had a small tear in her eye...( I may cry now myself!)
Anyways people have jobs etc. and the staff told us she was in the best care they could give, it seemed true enough they were super kind with all of us, about 12 of us up there.
They gave us a large private room to wait in rd with food . It was a small town in N. Ca and very personal.
10 days after we all flew or drove him another call from my bro saying this was it, they all few back up but me, I couldn't do it.
I knew myself, I was going to need all my energy to get through the funeral. I am good at organizing under pressure and everyone else was fighting with each other out of fear and pain.
My little sister was reading the 23 rd Psalms when mom took her last breath. Almost picturebook perfect way to go out.
Seen way too many loved ones going out, step-dad too, not easy to see the last days when they are out of their minds.
My sister on the other hand did it her way, sort of.
She had a NDE almost exactly one year to the day before she really moved on.
She had no fear after being flat-lined and brought back in hospital because of her asthma.
When she left she had just had a nice lunch with her ( idiot) boyfriend and some others, a nice bottle of wine too.
Went up into a high rise to give a job estimate for a painting job , her BF was a painting contractor, ex rock band drummer, full time jerk.
She was feeling a bit tight with breathing and excused herself while the others looked at the job.
They found her blue and passed on when they returned, no fuss no fanfare , just gone.
Of course people often get upset with each other when these stressful things happen. I know when mom was in hospital my sister and brothers were all over the place. We all went to the cops to file a abuse charge, went to step-dads house to confront his 90 year old dad as to where he was hiding. He hid out from all of us since he knew he had messed up big time.
My skinny sister climbing through the window on the roof of mom's place to break in and get her stuff out, found a check for the 6 of us kids, if she hadn't broken in step-daddy might of cashed it in.
Just way too much drama for me, guess that's another reason I could go up for the very end, didn't wish to see act 2 of the insanity with everyone freaking out on each other.
Would of been nice if mom had told us her cancer had come back strong but it wasn't her style to upset anyone or to be a "cry baby" as she would of said.
She sort of did it the old fashioned way of the Mohawks,she was proud to have native blood in her. Just go off by yourself and let others get on with life. Creepy but I understand how she thought, I hope I can be as brave if I should ever get really ill. In my case I will probably hit my head on something and never wake up again.Done it so many times, hit my head hard and passed out. Maybe next time it will be lights out for good. No problem.

klsallee wrote:

fluffy2560 wrote:

Dunno about Freud. Some of his theories have come in for criticism.

I was not actually promoting the Freudian school. I simply said "Using Freudian terms", mostly because most people have heard of the Id, Ego and Superego and know what they mean, so could conceptualize an idea about the issue you raised.

All branches of psychology have their share of criticism. And others are simply the favorite flavor this month. Feel free to select your own school to summarize.

Normally the thing they promote now is CBT - Cognitive Behavioural Therapy - self analysis to repair or at least rationalise one's own illogical thinking. 

Freud saw everything about sex and mother!

SimonTrew wrote:

fluffy2560 wrote:

Working nights?

I tend to keep odd hours like, it seems, you do. Actually this week I have been working on the house from about 5 or 6am to about 10 or 11pm at least, and then need a few hours to wind down. But I don't usually need about more than 4 hours' sleep a night. I never use an alarm clock, I always just wake up quite early and go to bed quite late. The Hungarian habit of being tucked up before 9pm is quite odd to me, but then they tend to have earlier starts at work than British people do. Still...

fluffy2560 wrote:

I think Freud has been discredited quite a bit and others have been given higher praise.   

Every time I think of Freud, I always think of Clement Freud and that dog food advert on TV.

I wonder what Freud senior would have thought of that association.

He would have called it Freudian Slop.

And tell me, Mr. Fluffy, why do you think of Freud so often and what do you think that may mean?

I am regularly up to 0200h or 0300h myself.  I find I never have enough time to do stuff during the day, especially during school times.  I usually find I fizzle out around 1930h, nod off for 30 minutes, then start again.  I do get up at different times, sometimes like 0600h  some days and then 0900h other times.  If it's really sunny, I usually get up but if it's rainy and miserable, then less likely to surface.  Usually I try and reserve after say about 14.30-15.00 for my house DIY (and there's a lot of it). With the daylight hours being so much better now, I can go on to 19h or even later now.

Interesting bloke Clement Freud, hugely successful as a raconteur, celebrity chef, soldier, TV personality, member of parliament and grandson of Sigmund. And also a darker side to him, allegedly a child molester - was never tested in court.  Obviously not the person the public saw as a personality - case of Clement Fraud.

Hmmm....breakfast....Freud eggs...maybe...

You know when I think it over some I do believe my mom had a "death pack" with my step-dad no. 2.
Why else would he allow her to be out cold for 3 days before calling for help?
He had been a Navy medic and wasn't 100% stupid.
He was super afraid of my siblings though, hid out the entire time we were around, makes one almost think he might of been guilty of something fishy.
My brothers were going to "take care of him". My sister was too, she might of been scarier then my 2 bros.
We  will never  know. We did try to file a police report but no luck really. His old dad was a "old boy" in town and well known so the cops weren't going to look into it very far.
My mother's doctor told us she quit seeing him and told him she was done with all treatments.
He legally couldn't tell us before it was too late.
seems she was ready to leave on her own terms.

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

You know when I think it over some I do believe my mom had a "death pack" with my step-dad no. 2.
Why else would he allow her to be out cold for 3 days before calling for help?
He had been a Navy medic and wasn't 100% stupid.
He was super afraid of my siblings though, hid out the entire time we were around, makes one almost think he might of been guilty of something fishy.
My brothers were going to "take care of him". My sister was too, she might of been scarier then my 2 bros.
We  will never  know. We did try to file a police report but no luck really. His old dad was a "old boy" in town and well known so the cops weren't going to look into it very far.
My mother's doctor told us she quit seeing him and told him she was done with all treatments.
He legally couldn't tell us before it was too late.
seems she was ready to leave on her own terms.

I don't know if you heard the story here in HU recently of the guy who was looking after his sick mother for years - she was in very poor shape.  He had no help and was surviving on social money.  Sounds like he cracked and left her alone for 5 days.  She died as she couldn't even drink herself.  I think he's in the prison now.  I don't have a link, Mrs Fluffy told me but I am sure someone will post a link.

That is just horrible.
5 days wow, she must of been a sad mess when they found her.
I would bet her son had some stress issues and alcohol issues as well.
Walked today past the hospital where all the ambulances and police went to early today. The police were still at the hospital. Must of been some sort of huge brawl or something else very serious to keep them at the hospital for hours.
Not sure what to say really,just give me the good drugs and I'll be fine if I am that ill.
My step-dad had some good stuff but still was in pain, he hung on for nearly 3 years which all the doctors gave my mom credit for. She was juicing, chopping cleaning several times a day you name it she did it. Read all sorts of medical papers and tried everything to make him comfy and happy.
Held a huge BBQ at their home towards the end so all his old co
-workers could say so long. About 50 people showed up in her small house and yard
At his funeral it was standing room only, super surprised he knew that many people. Amazing to know what sort of impact  we all have in our lives on other people.
In my case, I doubt more then a half dozen will show up and then they will only come for the free drinks!!

My sister had a sort of wake and no official funeral.
It was totally "rock & roll."
A fist fight broke out, people were doing lines in the bath and there was music and dancing.People were even "doing it" in spare rooms!!
I lived out of state and didn't go. I was bonkers and in no mental state to do anything. We were super close and my mind and heart were done. I think I may of gotten a bit mad at all the depravity at this "wake".
My younger siblings went and told me all about it, I even got a poster board of photos from the lesbian women and her partner who held the event.
My sis was bi- sexual , mostly straight but this one women was in love with my sister even though she had been rejected, just friends only.
I also found that gay women to be very funny and nice but not my sisters type.
About 60 people were invited but many just crashed the party.
Guess my sister is still in a draw in my nieces home... Creepy.

I was very mad at my mom's funeral for a few reasons but just 'sucked it up" and didn't say a word, was too afraid that if I said anything it would become a fist fight.
First off my no. 2 step-dad the father of my half bro and sis, had a uncle who was so sort of "big shot" in Ca. with the DMV and other city connections going on. He showed up at my mom's funeral with his wife and my step-dads aunt in the guys new Rolls Royce. My mom was a simple person that never ever showed off.
They tried years back to break up my mom and step-dad's marriage because he was 12 years younger then my mom.They didn't want him to marry a divorced women with 4 kids already.
Not their darn business.
Then my now deceased sister was late for the minister . We waited until he had to leave to start with the funeral words.
My sister showed up about 30 mins later, drunk as can be and swearing at everyone for not waiting for her, again her lamo BF was to blame really.
It was not the send off my mom would of liked, oh yes, almost forgot I just about got up from my seat to punch my step-dad's uncle in the gut. He had the brass balls to actually pick up my mother's cremated remains and shake the box and comment on how light it was!! WTF and WTH!? Really classy!
Took every oz. of self control in me not to blow up right then and there.
Not sure who invited that crew of jerks, guess my half bro and sis because I never liked those people at all.
I give all credit for peace to my husband, he really kept it together for everyone. a real hero that day for sure.
Never anything goes "normal" in my family, always so  much silly drama.
It was bad enough that my little bro and i showed up early because I had stored all the flowers at my home over the weekend. Mom was cremated and it take a few days between viewing in the home to getting the remains back in hand. We came early to set up the flowers and make sure the chairs etc. were in place.I wanted everything to be perfect.. what a laugh.
Has we walked to the burial site the groundskeeper brought my mom's box out. I had never seen anything like that before and my legs went out from under me. My bro caught me before I hit the dirt in my nice crisp suit.
Didn't need so much drama that day from people who I never invited to come.
No funeral for me, not going to put anyone under so much pressure when I go.

BTW, for those interested in planes, it's May Day next Tuesday and there's an airshow between Parliament and Erszebet Bridge and car racing/displays elsewhere (might be Hosnok Ter).   According to my information the flying schedule is:

Location: Between Elizabeth Bridge and the Parliament.
•    14.00 – 14.15 -Peter Besenyei – acrobatic flight
•    14.15 – 14.27 – Flying Bulls BO-105
•    14.27 – 14.47 – Flying Bulls (Alpha Jet etc.)
•    14.47 – 15.02 – Czech Flying Bulls
•    15.02 – 15.12 – MI2 helicopter – Lajos Imreh
•    15.12 – 15.27 – Goldtimer formation (Kánya, Gerle, PO-2, LI-2)
•    15.27 – 15.35 – Wizz Air
•    15.35 – 15.45 Acrobatic flight by Tamás Illés

I've seen this airshow several times. It used to be Malev flying down the Danube but now it's Wizz Air.  Quite a sight to see a low flying airliner over the river.

Seen this a few times, nice and noisy but a fun time, a BYO thing for me. A couple beers and a mat to sit on and relax time.
We plan on driving out early May 1st. to the city where my husbands family comes from , nice small city near Eger.
They have some dancing events and music, been planning on going there for ages and the weather is now perfect for some day trips in Hungary.
Sometimes I feel silly thinking of going someplace when I have still so much to see right here in Hungary.
Just have to make sure our batteries are good in our camera, we don't do cell photos. So 90's here with our camera and video cameras.
The photos do seem to come out better with a "real camera" so many cell phone photos seem way too dark or maybe the sun was in the wrong place when the photo was shot.
Our son has been wanting us to look around the old homestead and take photos so that's our program for May. 1st. God willing of course.
I always cross my fingers because most plans I make fall through, best to just wing it most times and never make solid plans.
PS if you should attend the air show, be sure to do a few neck rolls beforehand. We once looked up so long our necks ached for days afterwards.

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

Seen this a few times, nice and noisy but a fun time, a BYO thing for me. A couple beers and a mat to sit on and relax time.
We plan on driving out early May 1st. to the city where my husbands family comes from , nice small city near Eger.
They have some dancing events and music, been planning on going there for ages and the weather is now perfect for some day trips in Hungary.
Sometimes I feel silly thinking of going someplace when I have still so much to see right here in Hungary.
Just have to make sure our batteries are good in our camera, we don't do cell photos. So 90's here with our camera and video cameras.
The photos do seem to come out better with a "real camera" so many cell phone photos .....
PS if you should attend the air show, be sure to do a few neck rolls beforehand. We once looked up so long our necks ached for days afterwards.

Yes, I think we'll go and have a look at the airshow but only for that, then we'll leave immediately.  We'll go by public transport because it will be impossible by car.  I tried to drive to the fireworks last August but couldn't find anywhere to park so it was a total waste of time.

A couple of years ago, I actually tried to buy a digital camera in the UK to replace a broken one and couldn't do it.  There were so few decent models in a reasonable price range.  When I asked, the people in the camera shop said that everyone was using their phones.  I hadn't even thought about that - I always thought a camera would be of higher quality but after comparing the higher end phones, now I've abandoned using digital cameras totally and only use my phones.  It's one less device to carry and charge up and buy batteries.  Moreover, you can share immediately - within seconds  -  to anyone, anywhere in the world.

But have a nice day in Mouse (Eger).

Starting to rethink driving way out there, the fam is from Gyongyos and I was lead to believe tomorrows events were held there.
No, close by in another town.
Actually just wanted to see Gyongyos up close but since things will be closed for the holiday it might be better to visit on a weekday so we can go into the museum and other city offices there.
Checking out some other places outside of Budapest for a nice drive but not so far away.

That even tomorrow was suppose to have a car show, music and a dog show.
Love seeing dogs but sort of a long ride just to see Rover.
One of the band playing there is called,"The Dynamite Dudes" they do not exactly sound like my sort of R&B or Rock &Roll.

Crazy to see myself not enjoying most of the current music.
Feel like my mom when she was going on about Benny Goodman and swing music, at least that was real music.She was a really good jitter bugger.
Getting older and finding your taste in music is "old school" is very odd.
To me music sort of died in 1969 and the finally death nail was in the 90's.

We bought a Sony digital video camera last time in Vegas at a second hand shop near our sons home. Was half price senior citizen discount day! Got it for $25. and it is really a nice one.
We don't have a cell phone that takes photos, I am serious we are stuck in the 90's.
I still have DVD's and most of my fave music is still on tape, not 8 track but audio tapes...
Need to download all of it onto a more modern format and then I will have allot of free space in the apt.
Hard thing is most of my husbands gadgets for such a job are in storage in Vegas. Hard to want to start a project and then realize the equipment is thousands of miles away and locked up tight.
Oh well, many I will just toss some of it out next throw out day.

There is going to be live music up in the Taban tomorrow as well as the air show. Just bring something to sit on because people just climb up the hills and sit on the lawn and listen, you can bring your own drinks but they do sell some drinks and food there.
Gets really crowded, not sure about the music though.Went 2 years back when we just got home from the US , was still jet lagged but we went out, it rained so we cut it short, was fun for a short while. I get bored within a few hours so day long events are not for me.

My husband , his friends and my sister went for 2 or 3 days to the first Ca. Jam concerts.
I chose to work instead, unless it was a full day of Stones, Kinks, Yardbirds or Little Richard, I can't sit and listen for long.
I might of actually gone with them but,my husband didn't make it clear to me.
We had just started dating and he didn't ask me to go in the "proper way" a guy should ask a lady out. He didn't speak English very well so not really his fault, I was only 19 and not a tolerant as I am these days.
He told me he was going and asked if I was going too? Didn't make it clear that he wanted me to go or not, I thought maybe he was going without me with just his friends so I said no, I have to work. Later I understood and my sister was going.I was too proud to say I changed my mind and wanted to go along.

Almost went to Altamont with my sister in 1969. Mom actually gave us the ok to go.
My sister hear they had changed the location of the venue plus rain was  in the forecast, plus she heard that the Hell's  Angels were in charge of security. It was known before hand that they would be there so why on earth they were put in charge is a mystery only the Stones and their management will ever know.
It would of been a real "drag" in so many ways.
Think I was 15 or 16 , might of been able to handle tons of people back then but now anything over 100 people and I fidget and want to leave.
These events always draw a crowd , lucky for me I can just walk home without any bother of parking , good thing about living inside the city, can walk just about anywhere without too much hassle.

Just heard today and tomorrow there are music events happening in the city park, was going on since Sat. Might be interesting to check it out too.

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

Starting to rethink driving way out there, the fam is from Gyongyos and I was lead to believe tomorrows events were held there.
No, close by in another town.

Actually just wanted to see Gyongyos up close but since things will be closed for the holiday it might be better to visit on a weekday so we can go into the museum and other city offices there.
Checking out some other places outside of Budapest for a nice drive but not so far away......

There is going to be live music up in the Taban tomorrow as well as the air show. Just bring something to sit on because people just climb up the hills and sit on the lawn and listen, you can bring your own drinks but they do sell some drinks and food there.....

Just heard today and tomorrow there are music events happening in the city park, was going on since Sat. Might be interesting to check it out too.

Getting to the airshow by public transport is relatively awkward and expensive from here (Budakeszi).  Obvious place to travel to is Batthyány ter, see the show and get out again.  Four of us, with up to 3 tickets each, each direction, comes in a tad under 8K HUF.   That's rather a lot compared to the fuel costs.  So we'll drive down to to Moscow Square (it's not Szell Kalman ter) and go by red metro or maybe tram or even just walk.

We've been to Gyöngyös a few times as it's gateway to the Matras.  There's a small train which goes up the hills but we've never managed to coincide a visit to actually get a ride up there.  It's either not operating or the wrong time of the week or year or whatever. 

Couple of years ago, we spent a few  days with the kids at Aggtelek visiting the area. There are the caves to see and nice scenery and some interesting villages.  We stayed in a kind of chalet/little house at Aggtelek.  It wasn't the Kempinsky or Hilton but it was fine for 2-3 nights.  Took our bikes and cycled about and did gyulasleves over a campfire.  Definitely no crowds there!

One place out that way I thought was not up to much was Hortobágy National Park.  Would be Ok for birdwatchers if into that.  But I decided not worth visiting there again - nicer down at Balaton.

Love Balaton only want to see Gyongyos because my FIL came from that city and they go back a long way in the area.
More to take some photos etc. for our son.
We will go there for sure in 2 Sundays, they are having some sort of custom thing from the 1800's or 1700's, well some sort of event in the square.
good photo ap. in any case.
I know the cost for public transportation is high for a family.
it can add up quickly.
My husband can travel anywhere in HU for free as a 70 year old citizen but I pay full price. Was thinking of taking a train to Balaton but overall it is cheaper to get here by car plus no putting up with other travelers.
I "MAY" be able to apply for a discount travel pass in mid June, have to be at least 63 1/2 years old and only will be able to get it because I am a dependent on a HU retired person.
It really gets complicated reading all the details for any official things here.
Was told I had to be 63 then 63 1/2 then have SS papers , then can apply through my husband as I am his dependent and do not need translations of my own paperwork.
Who knows what will happen by mid June? They may just change the rules yet again for a discount.
Worth us checking it out though, get a city pass for just over 3,000 a month and a few discount train tickets come in a package through the mail. One is for 90% off and a few are for 50% off train travel.
will take the train to Balaton this summer if I get that pass, otherwise it's car only.
I know it seems cheap but that's one reason I live here, to save money and live cheap as possible for now.
It is a good 5,000 Forints round trip to Balaton as it is.
Parking can be a issue out there so we always arrive early to get a spot.
Tomorrow at the Taban, Mini and Charlie are playing in the evening, so over both of those old acts. Charlie will close the show at 8 pm.
Old gravel voice himself.
Both acts were state approved in the old days and they are still hanging around for crumbs.. Our old friend in Hawaii was buried here in Buda used to be the drummer for Mini.
The singer showed up at his funeral but was so aloof and strange, our old friends hang with both acts, such snobs it isn't funny. Boring really.

Speaking of music,just about fell off my elliptical machine right now, was listening to Rip this joint by the Stones and remembered them playing it live in 71 when my BFF and I saw them play. laughed just thinking about it and almost hurt myself.
Died by laughter. Easy to entertain myself.

fluffy2560 wrote:

A couple of years ago, I actually tried to buy a digital camera in the UK to replace a broken one and couldn't do it.  There were so few decent models in a reasonable price range.  When I asked, the people in the camera shop said that everyone was using their phones.

True.

But phones cameras are mostly the 110 camera of the 21st century. Fine for the masses to take average snaps. But if you want something more, like a real optical zoom (and yes, the difference to digital zoom is significant), a dedicated camera is still the better product.

And for serious video, phones are not usually an option either.

fluffy2560 wrote:

Moreover, you can share immediately - within seconds  -  to anyone, anywhere in the world.

The world can do with less instantaneous gratification, IMHO.   

klsallee wrote:

fluffy2560 wrote:

A couple of years ago, I actually tried to buy a digital camera in the UK to replace a broken one and couldn't do it.  There were so few decent models in a reasonable price range.  When I asked, the people in the camera shop said that everyone was using their phones.

True.

But phones cameras are mostly the 110 camera of the 21st century. Fine for the masses to take average snaps. But if you want something more, like a real optical zoom (and yes, the difference to digital zoom is significant), a dedicated camera is still the better product.

And for serious video, phones are not usually an option either.

fluffy2560 wrote:

Moreover, you can share immediately - within seconds  -  to anyone, anywhere in the world.

The world can do with less instantaneous gratification, IMHO.   

I think that's pretty much right.  They are getting better and better though.  The Apple cameras are good.  But professional stuff on a smartphone, forget it!

I do find the smartphones useful for work. If I'm snapping something like a document or a bit of equipment or something on a whiteboard, I can get it logged so I don't have to remember.  It's really very convenient.  I also use it when I'm dismantling something. I take shots of the bolts, screws, connectors and then I can see where they go back afterwards.  The number of times I've had bolts left over and not been sure what's missing is too many.  We often find sending pics to people helpful for sharing with technical stuff - here's the bit of gear, let me know your thoughts etc.

I must say though, sometimes it's stupid.  I was sitting on the banks of the Mekong river once having a Skype call with someone.  Benefits and disadvantages of 4G. Caught slumming it in my T-shirt.   But it worked. Light years away from those days of the brick phone.

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

Love Balaton only want to see Gyongyos because my FIL came from that city and they go back a long way in the area.
More to take some photos etc. for our son.
We will go there for sure in 2 Sundays, they are having some sort of custom thing from the 1800's or 1700's, well some sort of event in the square.
good photo ap. in any case.
I know the cost for public transportation is high for a family.
it can add up quickly.
My husband can travel anywhere in HU for free as a 70 year old citizen but I pay full price. Was thinking of taking a train to Balaton but overall it is cheaper to get here by car plus no putting up with other travelers.
I "MAY" be able to apply for a discount travel pass in mid June, have to be at least 63 1/2 years old and only will be able to get it because I am a dependent on a HU retired person.
It really gets complicated reading all the details for any official things here.
Was told I had to be 63 then 63 1/2 then have SS papers , then can apply through my husband as I am his dependent and do not need translations of my own paperwork.
.....

Imagine having to fly the entire family back to the UK.  My parents are too ancient and wobbly to travel now.

Even with the cheapest tickets, car rental and worse case, somewhere to stay (if no cooperating relatives),  we're still talking about £600-£1000, which is 400K HUF.  I am starting to  think twice as the Fluffyettes get bigger and bigger as Fluffyette1 is going to be considered an adult for most things soon.

I am not far off 60 and I thought I'd get free public transport but I expect with Brexit, that won't be an option for me anymore.  And of course they keep moving the goal posts just to keep us all on our toes.

If you are legally married to your HU wife then as it stands ATM at age 65 you can also get free travel.
I am considered coming from a 3rd country ( lately the USA is turning 3rd world) so if Brexit happens it shouldn't affect you much either.

You have some rights as a spouse of a HU citizen as it should be if they are going to except anyone for benefits here who in not a citizen.
Why not even try out for HU citizenship. Not 100% sure but for us over age 60 they a slacker with the language rules.

As far as cameras go, my hey day of those close up shots are almost over with.
Need a lighting tech or makeup artist full time!
Be sure to get my "good side".
No, I'm not that vain, only spend 2 to 3 hours a day exercising ...
Our old friend's wife took some photos with us a couple years back, she was wearing shorts. She is one year older then myself but was a very pretty lady in her day.A bit short legged but her face was nice, she made sure to stand behind her husband in our photos to not show off her less then perfect legs... Vanity, one of the deadly sins...
Just finished dinner after a Tesco run, going to wash up and then we will check out the music in the city park, hope it's not all bubble gum pop music.
I would really enjoy just some basic Hungarian folk music instead of the top 40 tunes.
Dinner was pretty good, I asked my husband on a scale of 1 to 6, how was it, he gave me a 7.
I never try to reach for the stars, 10's are hard to come by.

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

If you are legally married to your HU wife then as it stands ATM at age 65 you can also get free travel.
I am considered coming from a 3rd country ( lately the USA is turning 3rd world) so if Brexit happens it shouldn't affect you much either.

You have some rights as a spouse of a HU citizen as it should be if they are going to except anyone for benefits here who in not a citizen.
Why not even try out for HU citizenship. Not 100% sure but for us over age 60 they a slacker with the language rules.

Oh yes, we're married - with papers and rubber stamps.  Our wedding anniversary soon.

Anyway, I'd never pass the language test.  My kids' pet hamsters are better at Hungarian than me.  I won't have to do the constitutional exam but meh, so what about that anyway.  It'll be just be the "little red book of Chairman OV" soon. I digress.

With Brexit, at least at the final day, 31st March 2019, I will become a 3rd country national.   There's a transition period of a couple of years but I have no idea (and no-one else does) how this is going to work out.  I expect I will have to queue up at the non-EU passports and I'll have to get a stamp in my passport each time. I might even need to go and get a visa sometime, god forbid a Schengen one.  There's almost no detail of the practical results of Brexit.  And there's less than 1 year to go.  I could just go on and on about it but I think I'd have to have a slug of vodka or two.

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

Dinner was pretty good, I asked my husband on a scale of 1 to 6, how was it, he gave me a 7.
I never try to reach for the stars, 10's are hard to come by.

He's a charmer. 

Mrs Fluffy's apple pie keeps calling me from the kitchen.  I should have more self-control but I'm bewitched by apple pie today.  At this rate I'll have scoffed the lot by tomorrow.  Then I can spend some time regretting it.

fluffy2560 wrote:

Anyway, I'd never pass the language test.  My kids' pet hamsters are better at Hungarian than me.  I won't have to do the constitutional exam but meh, so what about that anyway.

According to this (which I am not sure is up to date so can not attest to its accuracy (or my interpretation - IANAL)):

http://www.mfa.gov.hu/NR/rdonlyres/63EF … enship.pdf

The only time a language skill requirement is listed is when the applicant takes the constitutional exam in Hungarian. And :

The following shall be exempt from taking the examination:
....
c) persons over 65 years of age at the time of filing the petition;

Which I find interesting.

fluffy2560 wrote:

I must say though, sometimes it's stupid.  I was sitting on the banks of the Mekong river once having a Skype call with someone.  Benefits and disadvantages of 4G. Caught slumming it in my T-shirt.   But it worked. Light years away from those days of the brick phone.

I knew someone who would do video conference calls from home, dress up on top, and not wear pants under the table.

fluffy2560 wrote:

There's almost no detail of the practical results of Brexit.

Of course not. Because when Cameron called for the referendum, he did not think it would pass so did not bother doing any prep work required if it did. And so much disinformation was spooned out during the campaign, much of which is conflicting or just plane wrong, no politician can figure out a way to make all theses claims happen. And if they don't, they will get blamed by the electorate. And maybe loose their jobs. And politicians are often only good at trying to keep their job, little else. And this has them befuddled.

What a muddle.

klsallee wrote:

fluffy2560 wrote:

There's almost no detail of the practical results of Brexit.

Of course not. Because when Cameron called for the referendum, he did not think it would pass so did not bother doing any prep work required if it did. And so much disinformation was spooned out during the campaign, much of which is conflicting or just plane wrong, no politician can figure out a way to make all theses claims happen. And if they don't, they will get blamed by the electorate. And maybe loose their jobs. And politicians are often only good at trying to keep their job, little else. And this has them befuddled.

What a muddle.

It's more than a muddle.  It's double muddle.  Triple even.   By what ever measure one measures this stuff everyone is discombobulated.  Everyone was stunned that the Leave Campaign actually won.  Moreover, everyone was and still is totally befuddled by it and that's how we came to have the situation as it is now. 

It's got worse.  The balance of power is held by the Unionist parties in Northern Ireland.   Barnier (EU Chief Negotiator) from the EU suggested dividing the country.  This is a guy who knows almost nothing about the history of the region.   Everyone in the UK is horrified by his behaviour and suggestion.  I think he had to backpedal but he lost credibility.

No idea of the solution myself.  There's about 3.5 million EU citizens in the UK and I believe there are 1 million UK citizens in the rest of Europe (most of them in Spain, France and Germany).   Everyone is in limbo.

Whatever they decide, it's going to be very strange period.  No-one knows what is going to happen and people are getting nervous there's no detail of the transition period.

It's all got out of control.  We've now got the Windrush issue as well.  Looking back at people complaining about immigration and therefore voting for Brexit, this seems like it was eons ago and almost irrelevant decision.  We all moved on.

klsallee wrote:

fluffy2560 wrote:

Anyway, I'd never pass the language test.  My kids' pet hamsters are better at Hungarian than me.  I won't have to do the constitutional exam but meh, so what about that anyway.

According to this (which I am not sure is up to date so can not attest to its accuracy (or my interpretation - IANAL)):

http://www.mfa.gov.hu/NR/rdonlyres/63EF … enship.pdf

The only time a language skill requirement is listed is when the applicant takes the constitutional exam in Hungarian. And :

The following shall be exempt from taking the examination:
....
c) persons over 65 years of age at the time of filing the petition;

Which I find interesting.

I read that before some years ago but I thought it was ambiguous. They obviously mean the constitutional exam but there's another clause somewhere - possibly in a new version - which basically refers to being able to speak Hungarian. 

One does also have to take the oath in Hungarian which could be learnt phonetically but in other places (here included) people in say they also interview you in Hungarian.

I more or less think I've had it  on that front unless someone higher up looks kindly upon us soon to be "stateless" people.

klsallee wrote:

fluffy2560 wrote:

I must say though, sometimes it's stupid.  I was sitting on the banks of the Mekong river once having a Skype call with someone.  Benefits and disadvantages of 4G. Caught slumming it in my T-shirt.   But it worked. Light years away from those days of the brick phone.

I knew someone who would do video conference calls from home, dress up on top, and not wear pants under the table.

Mein Gott, someone else does it too?!!!

I say follow the money, the  Biexit thing will just in the end be another way for someone to make a buck or two.
They got some money out of us and with millions of Brits all over, it's going to be a gold mine for gov. immigration services.
Freaks me out, couldn't bring myself to read about it just yet, but noticed the "caravan" of illegals entered the US yesterday.
Why do we even bother with getting a passport let alone any visa's?
We are the suckers.
My Japanese DIL has taken her fingerprints as of last week and is studying for her US citizenship test.
That is not free at all, land of the free and home of the credit card debt...
Son is serious about moving to Japan but he wants her to get her US citizenship first in case they change their minds later on, don't want to deal with immigration again in the US.
All the money he has spent over the years with immigration for his ex HU wife and this newer version  could of set him up in style for a good 6 months in a harem!

Wow flying to the UK from HU is not so cheap after all, hotels are the big killer.
Back in 1986 when we did a 6 week European trip we only spent about 12 days in western Europe.
Everyday in the west costs us a good $400. in 1986 and we thought we were being careful.
We didn't go back pack style, why do that if you don't have to? My husband knew he was traveling with me and knew it wasn't going to be one of those camping trips with the boys.
I agreed to let him visit HU about 6 or more times from Ca. without me, 2 times to Hawaii alone and S. Africa once, just saying I was due a nice trip.
$500. back then to board our dog, still had large bills to pay in the US. That 6 weeks was not cheap at all.
We had our 12 year old with us and in Germany at a motel on the side road of some small village, they had the nerve to charge us for 2 rooms for a short 6 hours sleep time.
They said he was a adult. Not going to Germany again, too strict for me.
Within the first hour of leaving the airport in Paris we were down $200. and that was just for a snack and taxi ride.
I dislike being a tourist and getting ripped off.
In Belize  it wasn't so bad, at least we got something for our money.
Stayed in the rain forest in San Ignacio, Belize and it was really nice.
Stayed in a old English hunting lodge with swimming pool, nice rooms and some of the best food for reasonable.
Later in Vegas I worked with a Chinese women who immigrated from San Ignacio, she spoke fluent Spanish, English and Chinese.
Small world really.
One wouldn't really think Chinese in the middle of the rain forest in Belize.
No matter  how much it costs you may have to brave the cost and see your elderly parents in the UK.
You may be sorry later if you don't. Been there, the kids will remember this trip and it's important in the long run.Can always make money later but parents can't always wait.

We walked to the city park late afternoon yesterday to check out the free music.
Of course it was not our type of music, not sure who's type it was really.
Some parady group wearing silly customs and doing a few riffs from different bands, making fun of them. Very low brow stuff.
The biggest thrill was when I leaned up against a tree for a second and was covered on my arm and legs with ants!
The floor show I gave trying to get them off of me was allot funnier then the actual show.
My up close vision is worst then I thought!
Thousands of ants on the trees just waiting on some dummy to brush up and entertain them. Ants in my pants for sure!
My skin is still crawling just thinking of it.
Might go check out the air show today not sure just yet.
Woke up and had to check my blood pressure, it was so low I felt strange. only 100 over 80.
My husband the joker said that's what happens when you drink too much wine, you get the DT's!

fluffy2560 wrote:

I read that before some years ago but I thought it was ambiguous.

Yep. Typical Hungarian law.

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

I say follow the money

That process often answers a lot of questions.   

Unfortunately, the money sources these days are very well hidden. Takes Panama Papers to find out the real money sources. 

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

Freaks me out, couldn't bring myself to read about it just yet, but noticed the "caravan" of illegals entered the US yesterday.

Um. No.

Real news reported, so far, eight were allowed to cross into the USA to apply for asylum. 11 were reported arrested for trying to cross "illegally".

The rest are just camping out on the Mexico side. And they may apply for asylum as they are entitled to under international law over the coming days. From the source above, maybe as many as... wait for it.... 150 people. Wow. Scary. 150 people.

But, putting this into perspective, this "caravan" is less than 2,000 people in total. And is being completely blown out of proportion by the (cough) reactionary (cough) media (the real Faux News). Why being blow out of proportion? Because about 50,000 people were caught crossed illegally into the USA in March. Those are just the ones that were caught. And the average is over 30,000 a month. Over worrying about a few people in this "caravan", who may have real claims for asylum, and many of which want to apply properly by crossing over at a check point, is just silly.

klsallee wrote:

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

Freaks me out, couldn't bring myself to read about it just yet, but noticed the "caravan" of illegals entered the US yesterday.

Um. No.

Real news reported, so far, eight were allowed to cross into the USA to apply for asylum. 11 were reported arrested for trying to cross "illegally".

The rest are just camping out on the Mexico side. And they may apply for asylum as they are entitled to under international law over the coming days. From the source above, maybe as many as... wait for it.... 150 people. Wow. Scary. 150 people.

But, putting this into perspective, this "caravan" is less than 2,000 people in total. And is being completely blown out of proportion by the (cough) reactionary (cough) media (the real Faux News). Why being blow out of proportion? .....

I was looking at Euronews a day or so ago and there were so few people I thought it was just a small scale protest with some people atop the border fence.   Like the border guards are going to shoot those people.

Orange storm in an orangely quiffed teacup.

fluffy2560 wrote:

Orange storm in an orangely quiffed teacup.

Pretty much. Even if all 2,000ish want to cross, if they have legit claims for asylum, they should be properly processed. If they don't, they should be properly returned across the boarder. Truly a network news non-issue has been crafted into a non-issue issue by certain interest groups (i.e. follow the money).

klsallee wrote:

..... Truly a network news non-issue has been crafted into a non-issue issue by certain interest groups (i.e. follow the money).

Remind you of anyone more local?

Actually in our family, those who hung on for a long while when being terminal had a reason for hanging on.
My step-dad hung on for nearly 3 years with stage 4 colon cancer.
He had 2 young kids at home and it was important to him to try to be there as long as possible  my mom also wouldn't let him go without a fight.
His last day though when he was not responding to anyone or anything we had him taken to hospital, he wanted to pass away at home but last min. my mom couldn't take it, the kids would have to live in the house and it wasn't a good memory.
Believe me, they didn't let him suffer for long, within hours he was gone, they gave him some shots and we are sure that sent him on his way without pain. Of course they will never admit they helped him along his journey because of legal issues.

They do it though if they know there is no hope to recover.

Oops, forgot to use the quote, this came out of left field.

Didn't go to the airshow after all, just wasn't in the mood for a crowd.Beltane isn't my fave holiday anyways.

Weather is getting really nice, time to start squeezing into those swimsuits and hitting the water, trying to figure out where our first swim of the season will be. Maybe Palatinus ... Not too much difference between swimming holes these days so might as well go where it's fun during the weekdays.
Funny, when my mom was 55 we had a swim party at my house. She bought a new swimsuit but had to announce it was going to be her last swim season.
So funny to have seasons for events in ones life.
I plan on swimming as long as I can, even if wearing a swimsuit means getting a long lined version.
My husband bought me my very first bikini when we went water skiing with his friends.
I had scoured all the vintage thrift shops in LA finding the perfect 1940's two piece suit. Cute and modest.
My husband saw it and ran me to a shop and bought be a small bikini, my very first one ever.
Our mother would not allow us to wear two piece suits.
After our son was born, I was only 21, my husband took me to a swim shop on Maui and bought me a string bikini.
Not very modest in style at all.
I try not to embarrass myself by wearing a tiny bikini these days but wow some of the people here in Hungary either do not own a full length mirror or just don't care. 
Our old friend was a high fashion run way model in Milan , Italy, she told us that it was illegal to go topless in Italy on the beaches but women did it anyways. The police would walk the beach and give out tickets to women they thought were not attractive enough to go topless... Wow how rude and how embarrassing for them, poor things.

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

....
Didn't go to the airshow after all, just wasn't in the mood for a crowd.Beltane isn't my fave holiday anyways.
...

We were there.  Drove to Mammut, then walked down to the river.

Planes flew up and down as expected.  We were opposite the Parliament Building but all the action was down between the chain bridge and Erszebet.  I think we missed some of it. 

The pièce de résistance/cherry-on-the-top was of course the sight on Wizzair down the Danube as usual.   

Most of the other stuff was a bit meh.  Our kids were only impressed by Wizzair.