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Annulment/divorce options?

Hi Guys

I've met a wonderful Filipino girl and we've been living together  in our expat country for a few years now.

We are now looking at our future plans together and how/where we eventually retire but, here's the thing; she's still married.

She married many, many years ago and as it turned out, her "husband" was a drug addict that also physically abused her and then also had an affair.  She left him. 

Move on 8 years or so and we then meet in a country other than my home country or hers, the Philippines.  We want to get married but we see that this is going to be problematic and difficult because of him.  She recently contacted her ex over social media asking if he would divorce her and he refused outright saying "I don't ever want you to be happy". 

As it turns out, the guy is now living in Singapore with a new girl and has already had a child with ANOTHER girl back in his home province.  Given these bits of information I looked up an Annulment but it appears adultery is not a basis for annulment?  Hope i'm wrong!  I also believe, again, hope i'm wrong, that she cannot get divorced without his agreement, which is clearly not going to happen...

Have i misunderstood the rules about adultery? I hope so!  If this is sufficient grounds (maybe the law has changed?) then I believe this would be the best way, making sure the solicitors do not know it's because she want's to remarry a UK person... she's "seeking to ensure her husband doesn't have any claim on inheritance and that it goes to her family" ;-)


Thanks for any advice!!!

I'm looking to retire to the Philippines with my Filipino wife
....
I've met a wonderful Filipino girl and we've been living together
....
Have i misunderstood the rules about adultery? I hope so!  If this is sufficient grounds (maybe the law has changed?) then I believe this would be the best way, making sure the solicitors do not know it's because she want's to remarry a UK person

That's confusing - or I'm drunk.

You want to live with your wife but you aren't married, and you're complaining about adultery but you seem to have done the same.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article … iding.html

David Scott and his Filipina partner Cynthia Villamor are being hunted by authorities in her home country.
Police say Miss Villamor became pregnant with Mr Scott's child before she officially separated from her ex-husband.
Adultery is illegal in the Philippines, where it incurs a jail sentence of at least seven years.

http://mabuhaylaw.blogspot.co.id/

Basically, you could all end up in serious trouble.

Maybe it's confusing, maybe you're also a little drunk? :)

Nobody pregnant on our side, I can assure you!

Yes, in a sense, we are doing the same except we (well my girlfriend) WANTS to divorce the woman beating, drug taking, abusive ex whom she hasn't seen for nearly 10 years.  He however, HAS a child and is remarried in Singapore (illegally!) and remains committed to NOT letting my girlfriend divorce him. 

This is why we want to see what options are available before we get anywhere near the Philippines.

edit: We are NOT married, we WANT to marry but to do that, need a divorce/annulment for her first.  BTW, i'm not "complaining" about adultery, i'm wondering why it's not a basis for an annulment.

The husband (abusive or not) might well counterclaim, potentially putting you at risk of prison time if you were to enter the country.
If he's as vindictive as you say, he might very well do so.

Thanks Fred, defo something to be concerned about but, right now he has no proof that we've "done the deed" however, in his case, a baby.....

So, the original question still stands.... what's the best way for her to legally separate?

Awww darn it!  Just realised i put TWO separate posts in to one here.... please ignore the first one, that's been posted elsewhere.  This is regarding the Divorce/Annulment, NOT the rental income/tax.  Explains why you were so confused, Fred! :)

Divorce is forbidden in the Philippines.

There is only the way of annulment, which is a long one and costly ! In this case, the ex-husband should not agree for annulment ! If he agrees, the judge will consider that it is a divorce in disguised ! So, more he is against it better it is for your girlfriend !

That's good to know but, on what grounds can she petition for an Annulment?

The 2 most common grounds :

-Psychologically unfit

- Physical and psychological abuses

- Has she children with him ? if not, she can also say "not consummated marriage" (it is also another ground)

To complete :

1) Infidelity is not a ground for filing an annulment case

2) Physical separation, even 20 years, is not a ground also !


Generally, a spouse will try to show that the other is mentally problematic with the help of a psychologist. The psychologist will even not meet the "crazy person" and will do its diagnostic base on evidences given by the spouse filling the case ! It is big business for psychologists !

She has no children with him.   I have spent some time trying to research this and sadly, I don't see Physical or psychological abuse in the lists of reasons that can be used:

(1) either party was 18 years of age or over but below twenty-one, and the marriage was solemnized without the consent of his parents, guardian or person having substitute parental authority over the party, in that order, unless after attaining the age of twenty-one, he/she freely cohabited with the other party;

(2) either party was of unsound mind, unless such party after coming to reason, freely cohabited with the other as husband and wife;

(3) consent of either party was obtained by fraud, unless such party afterwards, with full knowledge of the facts constituting the fraud, freely cohabited with the other;

(4) the consent of either party was obtained by force, intimidation or undue influence, unless the same having disappeared or ceased, such party thereafter freely cohabited with the other;

(5) either party was physically incapable of consummating the marriage with the other, and such incapacity continues and appears to be incurable; or

(6) either party was afflicted with a sexually-transmissible disease found to be serious and appears to be incurable (Article 45, Id.)

None of the above seems to fit and suggests that beating up your wife/partner is perfectly acceptable within a marriage.

I'm not sure anyone would believe that he was not able to consummate the marriage...


Given his drug use though and the fact he used to beat her, I can see that clause 2 could be used?

Yes, this is number 2 which is used by most of the complainants with the help of the psycho

Thank you Geole, very much appreciated.


One final question to anyone that might get this far in to the thread:  As she doesnt work in the Philippines, does she have to be present or can we grant Power of Attorney to someone?

Talk to the Brgy Capt and the local priest and then get ready to shell out some doe.  Your problem is green.

Getting an annulment is a difficult and long process. And in your girlfriend's case, it might not even be possible until after the husband is 6 feet under. I would advise you just put the annulment issue on the back burner and shift your focus on how to protect your and your girlfriend's interests.

Do you have children? Is she supporting family back home? Heaven forbid that the husband get everything, including what you worked hard for. Figure out how could you leave each other and those who are special to each of you something they deserve after either of you have passed away, whether or not you eventually end up marrying?

Relationships can go sour. How can each of you get your fair share or benefits of the things you built / raised / saved up for if you decide to split up?

Just my two cents.

I've been through a similar predicament. A lawyer that I consulted with said mental cruelty is usually the best grounds for annulment in the Philippines. Of course the lawyer will charge you to hire a Psychiatrist/ psychologist to confirm that she has been put through this cruelty.(Of course we all know this is just a cash grab, but necessary to get the annulment). Forget about the adultery, way too hard to prove. Good luck my friend!

Filing for an annulment take time and money..your ground must be strong,physical abuse is one ground, sexual incompatibility is another one, not supporting the family (kids,if they have),mental and verbal abuse as well can also be grounds..let ur gf do the works.she must have some witness to the beating ,they will al be asked to take oath and prove that they know ur gf and her former husband that well,the witness will tell how they knew,what they know about them.how are they witnessed to the beating or verbal abuse etc..they will all undergo a psychological consultation..including ur gf.,u need to get a good attorney for this.also,make sure that none of you( the complainant and the husband) agreed to the annulment ,one party should show disagreement.that can help.i think.coz thats one advice we get from the attorney when we (me and my cousin ) filed an annulment for her.ur gf' husband will get copy of the petition,if he is not in Phils,the relatives (parents) will be the one to take it and it will be their responsibility to tell t the husband about the petition,they can then do a counter action ,both parties will then be called for series of hearings,,the more that ur husband do not appear in court,the better.both parties will also be undergoing imbestigations ,some authorised people will ask ur families if all the informations u stated and sworn are true.the psychologist will also attest and comfirm  all the test made and will explain in court the results,u need to remember everything,,ur story from the beginning,,and be constant about it,there will be lots of cross examining that will happen.
im not an expert on this,my basis for saying all these are the process that we gone through with the annulment petition of my cousin..and the attorney  tells/advise us the things my cousin should avoid..the do's and dont's..for ur gf,,she have to be physically,emotionally,and psychologically ready once  u both decide file the petition for the nullity of her marriage..one thing one..it cost my cousin 250k..it covers the fee for everythings,documentations,posting, mail,psychologist attorneys fee,(but for court hearings,im not so sure,coz i saw my cousin always pay the stenographer every hearing,,its not much anyways)..goodluck

Hello

mag ask lang po sana kasi on going na ung annulment ko kaya lang ayaw irecieve ng ex husband ko ung summon or kahit sa bahay nla ayaw irecieve ng parents nia.anu po ba mgiging epekto noon sa annulment ko if ever.

thanks

Kung may habol pa sya sayo, baka naman, ayaw p makipag hiwalay,

pero kung ok na yung annulment nyo, wala kanag ikabahala.

pwde mo sya kasuhan. salamt

Zanelenard :

Kung may habol pa sya sayo, baka naman, ayaw p makipag hiwalay,

pero kung ok na yung annulment nyo, wala kanag ikabahala.

pwde mo sya kasuhan. salamt

Zaneland,

Please post only in English please.

Regards,

TeeJay
Expat.com Advisor  :)

belle13 :

Hello

mag ask lang po sana kasi on going na ung annulment ko kaya lang ayaw irecieve ng ex husband ko ung summon or kahit sa bahay nla ayaw irecieve ng parents nia.anu po ba mgiging epekto noon sa annulment ko if ever.

thanks

Belle,

Please post on the forum only in English. If you wish to converse in another language please do so via a personal message as a courtesy to other members.

Regards,

TeeJay
Expat.com Advisor

Moderated by Priscilla last month
Reason : Please post in english only on this english speaking forum

If she still chasing you, maybe they do not want to separate neded

but if the annulment has already settle, not content to worry.

Unless, you can file the case for that.

: )

Moderated by Priscilla last month
Reason : Please post in english only on this english speaking forum
belle13 :

May anak po kasi kami and since ndi xa ng sustento eh ndi ko pnapakita.

Belle,

It is rude and inconsiderate of other members to post in other than English. Please familiarize yourself with the Code of conduct for posting on the forum:

http://www.expat.com/forum/viewtopic.php?id=191087

"LANGUAGE:

For better understanding and interaction with the other members, we invite you to post your messages in English. If you want to post in French, we invite you to participate on the Philippines French speaking forum; for your posts in Spanish, kindly use the Philippines Hispanic forum and the Philippines Italian speaking forum for your posts in Italian."

Regards,

TeeJay
Expat.com Advisor

Hi Sir teejay

she , needed to advise, if what she can doing regarding for the annulment already file.
But the problem is, no one else can received the file. coming from the family of her ex husband, even the ex husband.
Thanks

Zanelenard :

Hi Sir teejay

she , needed to advise, if what she can doing regarding for the annulment already file.
But the problem is, no one else can received the file. coming from the family of her ex husband, even the ex husband.
Thanks

As a new member you are invited to familiarize yourself with the code of conduct for posting on the forum, part of which includes the rules for posting in English. There are forums for other languages and this is not one of them.

Code of conduct Link:
http://www.expat.com/forum/viewtopic.php?id=191087

There are no exceptions and if you wish to converse with Belle or other members in other than English please do so via a personal message or you post will be moderated out of consideration for our other members.

Best wishes,

TeeJay
Expat.com Advisor

noted on this, sir thank and god bless

Stuza... You have been quiet lately... I read all the advises... quite demoralizing I would say. I hope you have meanwhile got some ideas though. On another note... I hear that that new c...y president Duterte has plans to push through congress a law against those annulment laws in favor of a proper divorce. If that law pushes through, be quick cause the divorce offices will get flooded. Meanwhile... lay low!

Another question for the Forum.... if annulment is not obtained and the other party gets some ideas... how can it be avoided that he/she grabs his share of properties... ??

Possible po madeny yung case.

If that would be in English and if you have some longer ideas... write again

P.

stuza,

dude, i think the best to give you legal advice is a filipino attorney. anyway, here is what i know:

1. divorce still aint allowed in the philippines. it would be much easier if your gf is married elsewhere.

2. there is an option known as legal separation. iy is much easier and cheaper but it won't earn you legality to marry another. else, it only allows  you manage your then on earnings and lets you inhibit from sexual obligations.

3. annulment is what the philuppines acknowledges. To qualify for it, you should establish a solid ground on nullifying the marriage, such as abandonment, sexual and physical incapacity, physical abuse etc. It is a lengthy mud slinging process which takes about twp years for cooperating parties. nowadays, i heard that the lowest cost is 250000 pesos. I suggest that you save all messages that your wife and ex had as well as all legal evidence that they havent been together. Keep a low key on your relationship because if her ex-spouse have enough brains, he may sue you for adultery. well, your wife can sue him too, especially his got a kid now. some times you have to fight fire with fire 😎

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