And also in the news ......

What an ***

https://en.tempo.co/read/news/2017/07/2 … karta-2017

(7/23/2017) Naiman, a 42-year-old manual laborer from the Island of Madura, has had a 12-year sentence handed down by a Denpasar Court for trying to smuggle 70.2 grams of methamphetamines in a capsule concealed in his anal cavity.

Hehe
The link opens to an article about a puppet show but that is grand.
😂

Driver turns Ferrari into fireball in 60 minutes

In a statement on Facebook, police said they asked the driver what kind of car he had. He replied: "It was a Ferrari."

"I've only just got it, picked it up an hour ago," he added.

In the same post South Yorkshire Police reminded drivers to take care on the roads, explaining that in recent weeks "driving styles have not reflected the road and weather conditions".

I've heard of a shotgun wedding but this is way out on the edge of blind stupidity.
Well, they did say, "til death do us part".

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-40797524

A Tennessee bride has been arrested after police say she pulled a gun from her wedding dress and threatened her new husband just hours after they wed.
Kate Elizabeth Prichard, 25, was still in her bridal gown when she was detained at a motel in Murfreesboro.
She allegedly drew the 9mm handgun, put it to her husband's head and pulled the trigger.

Fred wrote:

I've heard of a shotgun wedding but this is way out on the edge of blind stupidity.
Well, they did say, "til death do us part".

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-40797524

A Tennessee bride has been arrested after police say she pulled a gun from her wedding dress and threatened her new husband just hours after they wed.
Kate Elizabeth Prichard, 25, was still in her bridal gown when she was detained at a motel in Murfreesboro.
She allegedly drew the 9mm handgun, put it to her husband's head and pulled the trigger.

I did say. The USA 'breeds' a better class of Nutter

Long live the nutters

spanishpete wrote:

Fred wrote:

I've heard of a shotgun wedding but this is way out on the edge of blind stupidity.
Well, they did say, "til death do us part".

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-40797524

A Tennessee bride has been arrested after police say she pulled a gun from her wedding dress and threatened her new husband just hours after they wed.
Kate Elizabeth Prichard, 25, was still in her bridal gown when she was detained at a motel in Murfreesboro.
She allegedly drew the 9mm handgun, put it to her husband's head and pulled the trigger.

I did say. The USA 'breeds' a better class of Nutter

Long live the nutters

Most days, jus sayn!

Priests turned away from pub in stag do misunderstanding

A group of priests have been turned away from a pub – because staff thought they were on a stag do.

The seven seminarians had popped to the City Arms in Cardiff on Saturday night to celebrate the ordination of colleague Father Peter McLaren.

But when they arrived dressed in the clerical collar, the doorman assumed they were a group of revellers in fancy dress and turned them away.

It was only when the manager realised their outfits were genuine that the men were let in - to applause from other punters and a round of free drinks on the house.

One of the group, Father Michael Doyle, said similar misunderstandings were not uncommon, and that the group had been asked if they were on a stag do only the weekend before.

"The doorman basically said something along the lines of 'sorry gents, we have a policy of no fancy dress and no stag dos'," Fr Doyle said, adding that the situation was "just gold".

Using a mobile phone while driving is distracting and could cause an accident.

Other things are also distracting ......... but more fun.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article … t-M62.html

This is the moment a woman was caught on camera appearing to perform a sex act on a motorist driving his car at nearly 70mph along a busy motorway.
The man is seen with both hands on the wheel and his female companion's head in his lap on the M62 near Wakefield, West Yorkshire.
The driver, who is believed to be in his late 20s, then stares sheepishly over at the van where he is being filmed before it drives past.

Fred wrote:

Using a mobile phone while driving is distracting and could cause an accident.

Other things are also distracting ......... but more fun.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article … t-M62.html

This is the moment a woman was caught on camera appearing to perform a sex act on a motorist driving his car at nearly 70mph along a busy motorway.
The man is seen with both hands on the wheel and his female companion's head in his lap on the M62 near Wakefield, West Yorkshire.
The driver, who is believed to be in his late 20s, then stares sheepishly over at the van where he is being filmed before it drives past.

..........................You old boys relly need to get out more often..........................

spanishpete wrote:

..........................You old boys relly need to get out more often..........................

That piece struck a note with me because I, sorry, a friend had that experience when driving to Barnsley one day.
It does, I'm assured, make driving more difficult.

Election dates

http://www.bbc.com/news/blogs-news-from … e-41000857

A Russian dating app is attempting to boost voter turnout in the upcoming elections by finding users an election "date", it's reported.
Popular dating service Mamba has introduced a feature called "Voting Together" which offers to help users find a companion to go to the polling station with during the 10 September local elections, independent broadcaster Dozhd says.
To find an election "date", users swipe through pictures of fellow users, and answer questions such as: "Would you go to vote with her (him)?"
If two users say "yes", they receive a message saying, "It looks like we like each other. We can go to vote together on 10 September." They can then message each other and find a ballot station that is convenient for them both.

This news story is a nothing burger

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news … h-11037865

A little customisation never went astray, but one British teenager took it to the next level when ordering a humble cheeseburger from McDonald's this week.

When using the self-service machine Twitter user @Arikuyo thought she'd test out its elimination threshold.


And it turns out you can remove EVERYTHING from the burger one ingredient at a time until nothing is left.

But a system glitch means your order will still go through to the tills - and you'll be charged 99p for your empty bag.

Fred wrote:

spanishpete wrote:

..........................You old boys relly need to get out more often..........................

That piece struck a note with me because I, sorry, a friend had that experience when driving to Barnsley one day.
It does, I'm assured it can make driving more difficult.

Yup, the accelerator pedal foot does weird things and the spedometer fluctuates,
steering gets difficult yet manageable and one must keep its eyes focused on the road, and when zipping up from the drive make sure the zipper doesn't get caught on anything for it may cause a accident (ouch).

That's my take and I'm not speaking from experience, now the Mile  High Club is safer, one can usally join on Christmas or New Years and it must be a Redeye flight, few airline attendants, pilot kicked back, jet on auto pilot and prepare for a Smooove flight, take off,midflight and Happy Landing.

Not speaking from experience or anything, just heard it's safer and those blankets help keep the heat on.
Jus sayn! Flying better for concentration and relaxation, I think?...............>>>> That Way.

I like this one - maybe it's a wake up call to racists and bigots everywhere.

http://metro.co.uk/2017/08/23/supermark … m-6872026/

A supermarket in Germany has made a controversial point by removing all foreign products from its shelves.
The Edeka supermarket in Hamburg said that it wanted to confront racism with their own narrow-minded views and for a day sold German-only products.
On the shelves they had messages such as ‘this shelf is quite boring without vaiety' while the salad bar had a sign saying ‘our selection knows borders today' and the cheese counter said ‘so empty is a shelf without foreigners'.
That meant there were no Spanish tomatoes, olives from Greece and an all but empty cheese counter.

Fred wrote:

I like this one - maybe it's a wake up call to racists and bigots everywhere.

http://metro.co.uk/2017/08/23/supermark … m-6872026/

A supermarket in Germany has made a controversial point by removing all foreign products from its shelves.
The Edeka supermarket in Hamburg said that it wanted to confront racism with their own narrow-minded views and for a day sold German-only products.
On the shelves they had messages such as ‘this shelf is quite boring without vaiety' while the salad bar had a sign saying ‘our selection knows borders today' and the cheese counter said ‘so empty is a shelf without foreigners'.
That meant there were no Spanish tomatoes, olives from Greece and an all but empty cheese counter.

A Store without Cheese, Blasphemy,  jus sayn.

LSD
https://www.msn.com/en-ca/news/offbeat/ … ar-AAqzJB3

Thousands of ecstasy pills shaped like President Trump's head have been seized by German police.

The 5,000 tabs have an estimated street value of $45,000, authorities said.

"These are fake tabs, fake, failing, fake, very bad" an orange man was reported to have said in a tweet.

These ladies need a blow job before they go on a date.

http://www.thejakartapost.com/life/2017 … dolls.html

Sounds like something from a fast food restaurant.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/fat … weird-news

The rock-solid mass of wet wipes, nappies, fat and oil weighs as much as 10 double-decker buses.

Talk about a supersized fatburg(er).

The Museum of London says it wants to obtain part of the 130-ton blockage of oil, fat, nappies and wet wipes discovered in Whitechapel.



http://news.sky.com/story/monster-white … n-11033784

This guy could get his own porn channel.

http://www.pattayamail.com/news/nude-ge … aya-186794

The guard told police that the cyclist was pedaling around holding a bag of fruit in one hand fondling himself with the other. He said he called authorities as there were many residents and tourists around the area who shouldn't have to see such antics.

I'll bet more than a few would pay to see that one.

..

People will buy anything

http://www.bbc.com/news/blogs-news-from … e-41525394

A city in central Japan recently held a lottery for decorative manhole covers after a sale offer became twenty-times oversubscribed.
Maebashi, which is 77 miles (124 km) north of Tokyo, put ten second-hand manhole covers on the market for 3,000 yen ($27; £20) with three different designs, and was surprised to receive over 200 applications to buy them, broadcaster NHK reports.
According to TV Asahi, the winners may have grabbed a bargain, given that new covers cost some 60,000 yen each, but some of the lucky collectors have still yet to decide what to do with them.
One buyer, who took the day off work to drive up from Tokyo to collect his 40 kg (88 lb) purchase, shares the dilemma of many people who make off-the-wall purchases: where to keep it now that he's got it. "I'll put it in my porch, then I'll think about what to do with it," he told NHK.

I'm an excellent husband, looking after my wife's heath as much as possible.

http://www.thejakartapost.com/life/2017 … finds.html

Researchers from the University of Exeter in England have discovered that certain gases from stinky farts can combat diseases.

“Although hydrogen sulfide is well known as a pungent, foul-smelling gas in rotten eggs and flatulence, it is naturally produced in the body and could in fact be a healthcare hero with significant implications for future therapies for a variety of diseases,” lead researcher Dr. Mark Wood was quoted as saying in the journal Medicinal Chemistry Communications, as relayed by Yahoo News.

He added that a microbial byproduct within farts can lower the chances of heart attacks, strokes, dementia and cancer.

I'll pop out later to buy some tubing and a load of bottles, then I'll email the prof with a business offer.

'Second World War bomb' turns out to be big courgette, police in Germany confirm

A concerned pensioner alerted police to what he thought was a Second World War bomb in his garden – but the discovery turned out to be a little less terrifying.

Officers called to the property in Bretten, near the southwestern German city of Karlsruh, instead found the 81-year-old's discovery to be a particularly large courgette.

In a statement on Friday, officers said the vegetable, which measured 40cm in length, "really did look very much like a bomb".

Woman charged with driving a horse while drunk

A woman was pulled over by police in the Tampa Bay Area of Florida after riding her horse down a main road while drunk.

Donna Byrne, 53, was arrested and charged after a member of the public called the police to report a woman on horseback who appeared confused and possibly in danger.

When deputies from Polk County Sheriff's Office arrived they found her riding her horse in the busy road.

Officers carried out a breath-test, which showed her to be more than twice the legal limit.

The horse - named Bo Duke after a character on popular US TV series The Dukes Of Hazzard - was tied to a deputy's patrol car and ate grass as Byrne was assisted by police.

When Byrne was taken to Polk County Jail, Bo Duke was taken to the Polk County Sheriff's Animal Control livestock facility.

Byrne has been charged with DUI and animal neglect for endangering and failing to provide proper protection for her horse.

Sheriff Grady Judd said: "Ms Byrne was obviously not in any condition to be on the road. She not only put herself and the horse in danger, but also anyone who was driving on the road, which is typically very busy."

The Polk County Sheriff's Office has said it is taking the situation seriously, but it is most likely Bo Duke will be returned to his owner in due course.

That's their wedding night messed up.

Egypt bridegroom shot in genitals during celebrations - http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-middle-east-41925943

I've had some strange experiences but I've never has a BMW with 5 naked people crash into me.
If it should ever happen in the future, I hope the car is full of really beautiful women, preferably fresh graduates with nymphomania.
That would be an item ticked off my bucket list.

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2017/ … ng-charges

West Ham fans warned not to ring 999 as Watford defeat prompts emergency call

The club's latest defeat was too much for one supporter, who rang the emergency services because they "weren't sure what to do".

Ringing 999 because @WestHamUtd have lost again and you aren't sure what to do is not acceptable! It is a complete waste of our time. #999foremergenciesonly

— Force Control Room (@EPControlRoom) November 19, 2017

Stupidity is always good for a news story .. and this lot were really stupid.

http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-birmingham-42271150

An internet "prankster" had to be freed by firefighters after cementing his head inside a microwave oven.
West Midlands Fire Service said it took an hour to free the man after they were called to a house in Fordhouses, Wolverhampton.

From "Rusty radiator" awards to 'pointless prat of the year' award.

I saw this one about a pointless moron who was trying to work out why charity programs use celebs to promote their causes (Red nose day), and moaned, moaned moaned - totally forgetting the charity managed to raise 80 million quid that simply would not have been there if they hadn't made the program.

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-africa-42268637

Ed Sheeran has won huge success this year, but a more dubious honour has just come his way.
The UK singer's short film for the British charity Comic Relief has been handed a "Rusty Radiator" award, given to the "most offensive and stereotypical fundraising video of the year".....

...."It's not really about what was wrong with the video," Ugandan photographer and Rusty Radiator juror Edward Echwalu told the BBC. "But the general mentality that they have to bring a western celebrity with them.
"They have no idea about what's on the continent. Look at him: he got emotionally attached to the situation, it tells me that he had no idea and he was not ready to be confronted with the kind of hardship people in some African cities contend with."
So why do charities like to bring celebrities into these videos?

So why do charities like to bring celebrities into these videos?

Because they raised 80 million quid by doing it - Any other stupid questions?

I was trying to think of a comment suitable for the story and acceptable to use on this forum but I failed on an epic scale.

http://www.thejakartapost.com/life/2018 … -nuts.html

A Bangkok clinic that has drawn 100 men a month to its penis whitening service has caused a stir in Thailand, with social media users both baffled and alarmed by the phallic fad.

The Lelux Hospital, renowned for its body whitening expertise in a country obsessed with skin color, began offering the unconventional treatment six months ago after a male customer complained of "dark parts" on his groin.

"These days a lot of people are asking about it. We get around 100 clients a month, three to four clients a day," Bunthita Wattanasiri, a manager for the Skin and Laser department at Lelax Hospital told AFP.

The procedure, which uses laser whitening, got wide play on Thai
television and social media on Thursday after the hospital released images of a man undergoing the treatment.

^ Wow - apparently the Asian obsession for white skin goes even deeper than the European one for a tan: I have yet to see Solariums for private parts here ...
(But Nutters they are all!)

"all things bright and beautiful..."

Considering that approx. 70% of indigenous Thais are dark-to-light brown-skinned people, Thailand has yet to present a brown-skinned Miss Thailand contestant, to the 65-year old Miss Universe pageant. The current Miss Thailand is Eurasian, which is a modest up-grade ,  from the "usual" ethnic Sino_Thai contestant genre.

Indeed, the pronounced absence of significantly "present" brown-skinned Thai television hosts, on nearly all Thai television channels, speaks volumes, regarding the Thai (societal-wide) white-skin-color obsession.

Considering the age of Asian cultures, compared with the western world, one might (thus) expect to find a significantly more "socially" mature mentality, forthcoming from Asians, in general,......... instead,.................. eh?

Fred wrote:

As a note, I had to look up BDSM.
That doesn't mean I'm unfamiliar with that particular form of fun, just I didn't know there was a society dedicated to it.

There's nothing new under the sun, Fred. BDSM is just another "antiquated" form of organized religion? Read the Old Testament story about Sodom & Gomorrah, eh?

kRUBEN wrote:

Considering the age of Asian cultures, compared with the western world, one might (thus) expect to find a significantly more "socially" mature mentality, forthcoming from Asians, in general,......... instead,.................. eh?

The oldest Asian cultures (in Mesopotamia) were the origin of Western and Eastern civilisations. All other Asian ones are younger than European.
In case you mean the often quoted (mostly by nationalists) "5000 years of Chinese civilisation": It is a complete misconception, as Chinese culture only really got going with Qin Shi Huangdi in the third century BCE.
Furthermore, it is an interesting (but probably wrong) concept that older civilisations should be more mature. Where did you get that from?

beppi wrote:

kRUBEN wrote:

Considering the age of Asian cultures, compared with the western world, one might (thus) expect to find a significantly more "socially" mature mentality, forthcoming from Asians, in general,......... instead,.................. eh?

The oldest Asian cultures (in Mesopotamia) were the origin of Western and Eastern civilisations. All other Asian ones are younger than European.
In case you mean the often quoted (mostly by nationalists) "5000 years of Chinese civilisation": It is a complete misconception, as Chinese culture only really got going with Qin Shi Huangdi in the third century BCE.
Furthermore, it is an interesting (but probably wrong) concept that older civilisations should be more mature. Where did you get that from?

Sigh! beppi, your "Where did you get that from?" question has a tone of contention. Thus, I choose not to dignify your "remark", with a proportionate/contributing -FYI- response. I concede beppi!. You're "right" again! Ok?

Fred wrote:

What an ***

https://en.tempo.co/read/news/2017/07/2 … karta-2017

(7/23/2017) Naiman, a 42-year-old manual laborer from the Island of Madura, has had a 12-year sentence handed down by a Denpasar Court for trying to smuggle 70.2 grams of methamphetamines in a capsule concealed in his anal cavity.

I wonder what the penalty would have been, had Naiman been a foreigner, instead?

Fred wrote:

These ladies need a blow job before they go on a date.

http://www.thejakartapost.com/life/2017 … dolls.html

Indeed, a well stated drift