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Air travel from Vietnam

My girlfriend wants to visit me here in Florida. She has her passport and the travel company in Vietnam wants her to fly to Japan first, but the travel company wants her to stay 5 days and she only wants to stay 2 days. The travel agency wants 1,650 USD for 5 days. Seems a little high to me...Is there a way she can apply for her visa to Japan and book her own flight? And does she have to have 5,000 USD to travel overseas in her personal account? Lastly, can I pay for this service here in America? I do not want to pay more fees then necessary.I want to thank you in advance for your prompt response in this matter...
Richard

Let's put this another way.

YOUR girlfriend wants to go to JAPAN, not the Travel Agent. Then she wants to fly on to the USA.

If YOU are paying for the deal, book the WHOLE thing through a US travel agent. DO NOT USE EXPEDIA, TRAVELOCITY, etc. - use a real, live Travel Agent who specialises in VietNam - they are the ones who get 'contracts' for VietNam.

Contracts are the method airlines use to sell off seats at discount.

About the USD$5,000. What is this for? Until VN passports were freely available, the VN government demanded that travellers have USD$5,000 OR a house/property OR an immediate family member who would remain in VN as security to ensure the traveller's safe return.

This was in the 'boat' days. VN citizens don't have to leave anything in VN if they want to travel these days.

Jaitch is, as usual, the source of sensible and straightforward advice. 

Insofar as a stop in Japan is concerned,  if your girlfriend is determined to do this, the cost should be far less.  My wife and I just returned from a week in Tokyo.  Hotel rooms, excellent meals, and convenient transport all cost less than in Australia, UK, or Europe.  A budget of $150 a day is more than ample for good hotel accommodation, a couple of good meals, and transportation around town.

1stewart :

My girlfriend wants to visit me here in Florida. She has her passport and the travel company in Vietnam wants her to fly to Japan first, but the travel company wants her to stay 5 days and she only wants to stay 2 days. The travel agency wants 1,650 USD for 5 days. Seems a little high to me...Is there a way she can apply for her visa to Japan and book her own flight? And does she have to have 5,000 USD to travel overseas in her personal account? Lastly, can I pay for this service here in America? I do not want to pay more fees then necessary.I want to thank you in advance for your prompt response in this matter...
Richard

The beginning of your post seems a little confusing to me. Tell your girlfriend you will handle everything and see if she still wants to come and visit you. How long is her visa going to be for? Why only 2- 5 days in Miami? Or is it she wants to visit Japan for 2-5 days before seeing you, and she needs the $5000 for shopping? Now, that scenario I would definitely believe. So you need to investigate more.  :D

OP:
Some carriers give you FREE STOPOVER (Japan) without additional fees BUT the PAX might have to take the stopover on the RETURN flight rather than the OUTGOING flight.

Depends on how deep your pockets are.

@MIA2013
I get the impression the account was the bank account in VN. Back in the day, VN travellers had to leave security or get a bond! No more.

Wow! Thank you, for bringing light to this matter! I was having a problem providing a 5,000 bond in their banking account.I have provided thousands of dollars for her mothers hospital bill. I have given her about 4,500 USD. She spent 2,350 USD on travel  from Saigon to Dalat and to obtain a new passport, and divorce papers. I know for a fact she needed a new passport because her original had a date of birth mistake.She showed me her new passport,and I took a picture with my cell phone. Now we have to wait another month to get her divorce papers.Moreover that seems like a lot of money for a person to spend in less than one month! Now she is broke and wanting money! i am starting a new business and I had to loan the business 4,000 last week. My CTS Cadillac needs 1,500 USD for parts that is me performing the repairs and I have a limit on how much money I spend each month, which is 4,650 and I usually stop myself. So I told her I had a lot of cash outlays and wanted to slow down on the Japan trip...She told me she has to go to Japan before she can get a visa to come and visit me...Does any of this seem to be true? I told her I would send her 300 USD and she said what ever I could send...She did make a comment on a "Cheap Hotel" I did not want to pay 80 USD per night. She indicated I was cheap! Just background information... Wondering if it is all a lie?
Cheap  in America

Jaiitcch,  thank you for the enlightenment! Outstanding!

1stewart :

Jaiitcch,  thank you for the enlightenment! Outstanding!

You're a fool in love.  Why u being a home wrecker for having her leave her husband to be with you?  Are you that blind in love to give all your money to her until you're all dried out and as she leaves, you figure what kind a fool you are?   Please just save the heartache and think before you leap.

futuristickly :

You're a fool in love.  Why u being a home wrecker for having her leave her husband to be with you?  Are you that blind in love to give all your money to her until you're all dried out and as she leaves, you figure what kind a fool you are?   Please just save the heartache and think before you leap.

You have voiced thoughts that have passed through at least two other peoples minds.

That said you, futuristickly, have no grounds on which to make accusations such as "being a home wrecker for having her leave her husband to be with you" - divorce, in VietNam is, sadly, as common as many countries. But a damn sight better than the Philippines where divorce is difficult and results in separated but undivorced couples setting up home with new 'partners' who they can not marry.

VietNam has a very pragmatic divorce process and children's interested are protected. (Though often not enforced)

@OP
futuristickly has raised something that was in my mind, but unspoken. Money!

Things stick out in this post: (1) The time she will spend in the US with you; (2) The use of the word 'cheap'; (3) she has to go to Japan before she can get a visa to come and visit me; (4) She spent 2,350 USD on travel  from Saigon to Dalat and to obtain a new passport, and divorce papers; (5) she said what ever I could send.

1. Is she immigrating or visiting?;
2. People, allegedly 'in love' don't use the word 'cheap';
3. For VNese Japan visas are easy. For the USA very hard. PLUS she has to apply from VN for a US visa (unless the rules have changed) (Next tale of woe ... I am in Japan but I can't get a visa?). I think this is a big pointer as to her intentions.
4. Da Lat >> SaiGon bus about USD$6. BUT if she is living in Da Lat she can get her passport there AND her divorce (these procedures are very much based on family documents which are held in the province of residence). Passport and divorce couldn't cost more than USD$100;
5. This doesn't sound like something a future wife would say, more like someone milking an opportunity.

I am from Canada (one of the reasons I know travel is because my later work involved servicing travel agents) and I am married to a VNese woman. The only discussions about money were about protecting my money (funny things happen to VNese married to Foreigners like 'kidnapping', 'operations', etc. All the counter-signatures on our property were at her suggestion, likewise with bank accounts.

Test her intentions (discretely). Suggest that since she is having so many problems that YOU go to VN and get married then YOU could sponsor her as a wife FROM SaiGon! AND fly straight to the USA.

Whatever you do, keep control of the money! - in YOUR hands.

About Mother's 'operations'. My company pays for our employee's operations and rarely are they more than a few hundred dollars. Circumcision-$200; appendectomy-$200; broken arm set and plaster=$16.

Write to your girlfriend and ask her to send you copies of receipts of Mother's medical 'treatment' (hospitals issue receipts - although might be called 'clinics') as 'you have just found out that your medical insurance might pay for them'. Then await the response! IF the answer is 'I lost them' just ask her to go back to the hospital and ask for duplicates.

" Philippines where divorce is difficult  "

Thanks for the reminder, must be the only place, where when the Filipino moves to another country , that accepts Filipino papers, re separation, etc, etc, , and allows the Filipino to remarry in that country, ( and even divorce, to remarry yet again in that country ),  but once they return to the Phils, find they are still married to their previous Husband/wife , ( a " quick " divorce involves a long series of visits to overpaid psychologists, etc, usually taking up to a year ).

@jaitch

You have hit the nail on the head with this post.  I agree 10% with what you have stated.
Pure ans simple is that the OP is being taken for a ride.

After 40 odd years in Asia I have seen and heard of many many expat men being taken for a ride, including friends who have been thinking with their "little head" instead of the other.

bluenz :

... when the Filipino moves to another country , that accepts Filipino papers, re separation, etc, etc, , and allows the Filipino to remarry in that country, ( and even divorce, to remarry yet again in that country ) ...

This is legal if their new country is a place of residence (over 180 days) according to international laws.

The bit that gets me is the fact the Phils are a bible-thumping RC country but must have one of the highest adultery rates in the world.

Jaitch :
bluenz :

... when the Filipino moves to another country , that accepts Filipino papers, re separation, etc, etc, , and allows the Filipino to remarry in that country, ( and even divorce, to remarry yet again in that country ) ...

The bit that gets me is the fact the Phils are a bible-thumping RC country but must have one of the highest adultery rates in the world.

It's hard to meet a more vain bunch of men, ( they also think they can sing ). But many Filipino women,, understandably, don't actually mind their husbands having a mistress, ( in the Phils,  as long as he doesn't spend too much money on her ).

First of all I did not break up her marriage. I would never,never break up a family... She has been divorced 10 years and we need a copy of her divorce... I agree the word cheap did not set too well with me! That is a good idea to test the waters on the hospital bill! That is my plan now...I am a very simple and honest person and I do not lie so I do not think in terms of getting over on someone or taking the advantage of someone...My girlfriend is 30 years younger than I am, but if we marry and she lives with me here in America, I will buy her a home and when I pass away she can live here in Florida all her life and pay no property tax! And after my death she can receive my Social Security and military retirement to the tune of 2,500 USD for life. I have 20 more years to live...She could have a wonderful ending to her life with money and medical security for LIFE. Moreover she would have a wonderful life with me! But sounds almost too good to be true. All men are fools when it comes to women!The older you get the more you tolerate. The more beautiful the women, the dumber I get...LOL Life is all good no matter what. No matter what happens, I am happy... And that is the bottom line... Again thanks to all of you very much...Sometimes we can not see the forest for the trees! Wonderful insight.
Richard

Richard

1stewart :

First of all I did not break up her marriage. I would never,never break up a family... She has been divorced 10 years and we need a copy of her divorce... I agree the word cheap did not set too well with me! That is a good idea to test the waters on the hospital bill! That is my plan now...I am a very simple and honest person and I do not lie so I do not think in terms of getting over on someone or taking the advantage of someone...My girlfriend is 30 years younger than I am, but if we marry and she lives with me here in America, I will buy her a home and when I pass away she can live here in Florida all her life and pay no property tax! And after my death she can receive my Social Security and military retirement to the tune of 2,500 USD for life. I have 20 more years to live...She could have a wonderful ending to her life with money and medical security for LIFE. Moreover she would have a wonderful life with me! But sounds almost too good to be true. All men are fools when it comes to women!The older you get the more you tolerate. The more beautiful the women, the dumber I get...LOL Life is all good no matter what. No matter what happens, I am happy... And that is the bottom line... Again thanks to all of you very much...Sometimes we can not see the forest for the trees! Wonderful insight.
Richard

Richard

Don't worry too much Mate, you are not the first , and definitely will not be the last, for this too happen too.
That's why I decided on an older model, they seem to be more honest, and more grateful, ( knowing that VN men are not interested in many women over 30 ).
  Good luck, hope things work out for you.

Thank you for the fantastic wishes. Well I am a little older and I was married most of my life.My wife passed away after 29 years. And if it does not look good i do not want it. I have many chances with older women with money! i do not want money I have some. But not a lot of money middle income...But I am a man that Loves beautiful women. I want a sweet thing! And I am thinking how do I make all the arrangements here for her flight from Vietnam...

Great post! I agree with you 99 percent , 1 in a hundred it is real. It is 100 percent on my part. If i was a young man my reaction would be different. I am 66 and in good shape and do not look my age. I am in the last quarter of life! I take every day as a good day above ground...Even if I loose a few bucks...That means I bought the person cheap enough.But for a smart woman she can have it all for 20 years service. A good retirement for a wife 2,500 USD with insurance for life...A real deal...Live in America and retire to Vietnam on her retirement...

1stewart :

She has been divorced 10 years and we need a copy of her divorce...
My girlfriend is 30 years younger than I am,

I don't know why your beautiful GF didn't get married with any men during past 10 years after she divorced. At that time, she was just 20 years old, it's very easy to get married again because she is beautiful woman! And now, she is 30 years, she wants to get married with a very old man because of love/money?! Hmmm!

Honestly, I really don't trust your story! Sorry! I shouldn't disturb you here.



.

1stewart :

Great post! I agree with you 99 percent , 1 in a hundred it is real. It is 100 percent on my part. If i was a young man my reaction would be different. I am 66 and in good shape and do not look my age. I am in the last quarter of life! I take every day as a good day above ground...Even if I loose a few bucks...That means I bought the person cheap enough.But for a smart woman she can have it all for 20 years service. A good retirement for a wife 2,500 USD with insurance for life...A real deal...Live in America and retire to Vietnam on her retirement...

How easy is divorce in the US, how well do pre nupts work these days?, many Asians like to get married to Foreigners, and once they have citizenship, ( usually get YOU to get the rest of the family settled as well, at YOUR expense ), they divorce and take 1/2 of everything you have.
  You seem like a decent bloke, I'd hate for you to get " burnt ", there are plenty of other genuine fish in the sea.

1stewart :

And I am thinking how do I make all the arrangements here for her flight from Vietnam...

I told you, go to a REAL, LIVE, Travel Agent in Florida - not a MACHINE like EXPEDIA, TRAVELOCITY, ETC.

By your girlfriend HAVING TO GET A VISA IN SAIGON, spend NO MONEY until she has it!

SaiGon (and Ha Noi) are the ONLY places she can get a US visa from - people can't apply from Third Countries.

If she is after your money, and you tell her to get her visa from the US Consulate, then take a United (daily?) flight straight to the USA, skipping Japan - she will likely complain. Just tell her you checked with the Immigration people and they told you what/where she has to do to apply.

Then you begin to understand.

There is absolutely NO NEED to spend ANY MORE MONEY until she has the visa, then you can get a E-Ticket, send a copy by E-mail, and she is in business.

Once you have done this, and asked for copies of the medical bills (for alleged reimbursement) you will be very close to discovering the truth.

The female visa person in SaiGon is very senior, the last one is in jail, so if your GF can persuade her to issue a visa there is a good judge of character.

REMEMBER, NO TICKET UNTIL SHE GETS A VISA (and copies you with it).

I would concur with the advice that Jaitch has given you.  There are just too many warning flags up in what you write for me to mention all of them.  I hope that this turns out much much better for you than I honestly think it will,  And btw I'm a man who is a year older than you.  I haven't ever been taken advantage of in an engagement or marriage but I have married 3 times and dated a lot in Asia where I was a frequent visitor and occasional resident since 1968.  My daughter's mother whom I didn't marry is a very "cute" (at 40) filipina who's bankrupted 3 husbands and 2 boyfriends in the 22 years I've known her.  None of them ever suspected a thing until it was too late.

RayG :

I would concur with the advice that Jaitch has given you.  There are just too many warning flags up in what you write for me to mention all of them.  I hope that this turns out much much better for you than I honestly think it will,  And btw I'm a man who is a year older than you.  I haven't ever been taken advantage of in an engagement or marriage but I have married 3 times and dated a lot in Asia where I was a frequent visitor and occasional resident since 1968.  My daughter's mother whom I didn't marry is a very "cute" (at 40) filipina who's bankrupted 3 husbands and 2 boyfriends in the 22 years I've known her.  None of them ever suspected a thing until it was too late.

" cute(at 40) filipina "  Let me guess, she was a frequent visitor to the Casino, ( or pokie machines )?

ngattt :

I don't know why your beautiful GF didn't get married with any men during past 10 years after she divorced. At that time, she was just 20 years old, it's very easy to get married again because she is beautiful woman! And now, she is 30 years, she wants to get married with a very old man because of love/money?!

The OP said his friend was divorced 10 years AND was 30 years YOUNGER than him.

As a VNese female you should know the answer.

Vnese men, like Chinese men, prefer wives to be never married and young AND almost definitely without children.

I have around 34 single-parent VNese females working at our company and they all tell similar stories. Some men hang around long enough to get divorced - others just go walkabout. This is why dating sites have so many divorcees from China and VN.

One site I moderate has a 23-year-old female, divorced, with two children. What VNese man will marry her?

As a father of a teenage daughter I get asked a lot of questions about 'life' by her friends who seem to live in my basement. Believe me, there is little difference between older North American and VNese teenagers.

And often VNese females don't equate asking for money, for 'personal' favours, with prostitution.

I didn't have to read anymore to conclude that this gentleman is being taken for a ride. Marry her and you will regret it. Why spend all your money to bring her here when there are plenty of gold diggers in Florida, not to mention beautiful ones too.  :lol:

bluenz ,  most definitely.   otherwise it would have taken her longer to spend so much money.

No one can stop your 'destiny'  but you :)

Actually you people  saved me! What was I thinking! I am not sure why I trusted this girl. But I just sent her a text and I am demanding a copy of her mothers hospital bill... I guess the old  adage is true. Love is blind! No more money until I see she is what she says she is... Oh, I really hate to face this. I am going to feel stupid and foolish. She just responded and said she would send a list of her mothers medications. I ask her again for a copy of her mothers hospital bill in the amount of 3,200 USD... Anyway thank you people for the information on Air Flights from Vietnam and forcing me to pull my head out of my rectum

Buddy your getting screwed. Pull up anchor and move on. This girl has found a sucker.

ngattt :
1stewart :

She has been divorced 10 years and we need a copy of her divorce...
My girlfriend is 30 years younger than I am,

I don't know why your beautiful GF didn't get married with any men during past 10 years after she divorced. At that time, she was just 20 years old, it's very easy to get married again because she is beautiful woman! And now, she is 30 years, she wants to get married with a very old man because of love/money?! Hmmm!

Honestly, I really don't trust your story! Sorry! I shouldn't disturb you here.



.

Nga,  em oi....Stewart said he was 66 years old in another post. Therefore, his girlfriend was 26 years old when she got divorced. I don't think it is common in VN, but you might be right about why didn't she get married if she was beautiful. My uncle who passed away thanks to CHO RAY HOSPITAL  :sosad: was married to his ex-wife and had 4 children with her. My uncle was a very handsome man and she was a very beautiful woman, ended up divorcing and she married a very high ranking military officer in VN and is still married to him now. So, although it might not be common it is possible for VNmese women to have an afterlife after divorce.  :D

Thanks Jaitch and chị MIA. Still don't believe this woman, if this story is real!

I think many Viet men are willing to get married with divorced women, but some Vietnamese divorced women don't dare to get married with man who never married (I don't know English word, but in Vietnam, it's called "trai tân" :D). Because they are afraid many troubles from his family, espeically, mother-in-law. Vietnamese parents in Vietnam always meddle too deeply in their children's family... This is my experience after divorced :D. I really don't dare to love/get married with man who never married, because I always think, I got married more than 5 years already, it's really not fair for him.

But it seems my 'destiny'... can't say anything now :D.

OP: With all due respect you're getting played for a complete fool. The audacity to call you cheap while you have immensely helped her in every way possible is unfathomable.  I can assure you there's no hospital bill and everything else she has told you in the past is probably a lie in an attempt to empty your pockets into her bank (which she has succeeded in doing). Pretty soon, everyone in her family and their family and their family (you get the point) will suddenly be "sick" and will be asking you for more money. Houses will need "renovation" and so forth . It wont stop since you have gladly been sending her money. Cut your losses now while you can.

Oh and by the way, she can easily come up with a fake hospital bill to send over to you. Don't buy it for a single second. These girls know that most expats in these types of situations are so naive that anything they send over will be believed by the expat.

Jason Bourne

JasonBourne1 :

Oh and by the way, she can easily come up with a fake hospital bill to send over to you.

Yeah, sure, you were right. Most things can buy here. So OP, be careful with your money. It's not easy to earn money, but really, people who can't earn money, they never understand this clearly, that's why they spend money of others easily. I don't dare give/lend my money for who I don't know well, even I know well, I only give them 1/3 or a half of what they need.

If you need to do charity, I have many students who really need your help ;). Send me 5.000$, please, I promise I won't waste your money, and I will respect you all my life  :cool:.

charmavietnam :

No one can stop your 'destiny'  but you :)

No one can control your destiny but you,  anyone can stop it for you, especially with a bullet.

1Stewart, reference your:  "Anyway thank you people for the information on Air Flights from Vietnam and forcing me to pull my head out of my rectum"

Just look at the bright side. Anyone who hasn't stuck their head up their rectums once or twice in their lives has never really seen anything. ;=)

1stewart :

Actually you people  saved me! What was I thinking! I am not sure why I trusted this girl. But I just sent her a text and I am demanding a copy of her mothers hospital bill... I guess the old  adage is true. Love is blind! No more money until I see she is what she says she is... Oh, I really hate to face this. I am going to feel stupid and foolish. She just responded and said she would send a list of her mothers medications. I ask her again for a copy of her mothers hospital bill in the amount of 3,200 USD... Anyway thank you people for the information on Air Flights from Vietnam and forcing me to pull my head out of my rectum

I'm glad that our overwhelming consensus made an impression on you.  Don't worry about money already spent. Just don't lose any more. You're not the first man to make a mistake and certainly won't be the last.  My big mistake was 20+ years ago when I provided a lot of financial help for an old girl friend to get out of a very abusive marriage ... 3 times and 3 times she went back taking everything I and her other friends had bought for her even though she frequently ended up in the hospital. The last time I got a witnessed note for the money I loaned her and took her passport for safekeeping.  I still have that old note and passport.  So you could say I was a real slow learner.

JasonBourne :

... Oh and by the way, she can easily come up with a fake hospital bill to send over to you. Don't buy it for a single second. These girls know that most expats in these types of situations are so naive that anything they send over will be believed by the expat.

SIMPLE, just tell her the invoices will be verified by the insurance company before the money is paid.

Thank you Jason! I think you are right in this situation.I have done stated my position... No bill no money! She said she could not produce a bill from Bao Loc Hospital. She acted really nice to make me feel bad. And I thought she is not like your dead wife. My deceased wife would make a bill to prove her lie.Well I guess it was a good pay day in terms of Vietnam. I gave her 4,500 USD about 95 million dong. Too bad she made it bad for the next lady! I think i should just lie and cheat like they do...No, I will just walk through life alone! I can spend the money on me! I can buy a lot of toys for myself and as well as women. I think I want only coin operated women in the future.  That is probably cheaper than real LOVE. Again thank you for all the constructive criticism. I do not always like the truth,, but I must live in the real world. And I like to keep it real. Again thank you all!

Fake Matt Damon is actually right on point there.  It's not hard to pay off a doctor to write a receipt claiming a certain amount.  I hate to say it, but it's so corrupt here almost anybody can be bought off for a certain amount of money.  So with a couple of dollars out of the thousands that you've sent, it  should be quite easy for her to manipulate. 

@Stewart
Looks like your got yourself in quite a bit of a predicament I would say.  With such beauty can lead you to wrong paths in life.  It's like Homer's iliad, you let such beauty make you so blinded by love that the entire empire you've spent building your entire life come down to rubble and ashes.

So from your girlfriend's perspective,  it's completely ok to do that.  That's what makes her happy by taking your money and helping her family out.  It's just human nature for everybody to do that.  I don't care what anybody says but families are always first no matter where you come from.  It's hard to grow up there not having an opportunity to ever come up in life.  The poor stays poor and the rich gets richer, that's just the way of life there so please don't be so quick to judge the other side.  Some girls choose the harder route to go by studying and working hard and others choose the easier path by doing massage and prostitution.  No girl that grew up in a nice family wants to do that sort of thing.  Some girls do it secretly behind their families back but at the same time their intentions are good because the money they make are for the family.  Just not a good way to go because it can also bring shame to the family.  Girls there choose their own destiny.  I know it's a shady way to go but she doesn't have the luxury that you have to work hard and save to travel and buy nice things.

I know you want it to be like a fairy tale and live happily ever after in the end.  It's okay my friend, I know happiness is hard to find.  They say when you find happiness take it before it's gone because it may never come back again.  Everyone is entitled to their own opinions but in the end, it doesn't really matter as long as what makes you happy inside.  So to conclude, just make sure when all this is said and done, that you have no regrets.

futuristickly :

... It's not hard to pay off a doctor to write a receipt claiming a certain amount.  I hate to say it, but it's so corrupt here almost anybody can be bought off for a certain amount of money.  So with a couple of dollars out of the thousands that you've sent, it  should be quite easy for her to manipulate.

We are not talking 'Doctor', we are talking hospital and of the OP says the insurance company will check the bill she might get a little leery.

Personally, I would never pay a strangers hospital bill, there are provisions in VN where if there is urgency the government will provide at low/no cost.

I have helped VNese out with medical bills, but I have never been asked, and my wife, I would doubt, would even expect me to pay for a relatives medical expenses.

I am of the opinion that the OP is up to speed now and that he will invest in his ageing car and not in a woman who thinks she can get a US visa in Japan, and not her home country!

That is an OUTSTANDING perspective on humanity! I am not mad because when I am taken advantage of… I always put myself in the others persons position. I ask myself if my life was just like theirs, would I be doing the same thing. If I get a maybe that I would do the same thing. But I feel the other person needs it more than I do. Of course, I am disappointed, and look at it from a disadvantaged persons view…It is all good! Their loss of the Golden Goose! I hate to feel anger and hatred and the feeling to wanting to get even. I usually let these negative emotions go as soon as possible. Yes, I forgive people because I do not like feeling negative. When I forgive it is NOT for the other person. It is for my happiness and positive emotions as opposed as hate. It is all good, I am happy. This is a genuine reaction which would never occur to most people.  Empathy is not to be confused with pity, sympathy or compassion. These feelings are secondary, and cannot emerge without empathy first taking place. That is why sociopaths, whose mental architecture lacks a sense of empathy, are also deficient in pity, sympathy and compassion. These emotions have no empathetic soil in which to grow. No regrets because I am happy!

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