My bounty is as boundless as the sea, my love as deep

Is she in Singapore as well? Together with her parents or not?

- If she is not in Singapore and this is a long-distance relationship, WAIT until you have met and stayed together sufficient time (months rather than weeks). Only then can you see through the hormones clouding your brain right now and tell whether this is a real fit.
- If she is in Singapore alone (and thus has an own life), you two may decide on your own. (But remember that this may bite back later.
- If she's still together with her parents, I am afraid convincing them would be the only way.

hello shakespeare61
i know how you feel, also the distance is not on your side, but we are here to help as much as we can
as beppi said, the best way is to convince her parents, have you tried to talk to them?
i have seen that you are wanting to come to Algeria,  it is a good step forward and might push her parent to change their mind, but im sure you will face the language problem in expressing your feelings and love to them
my advise is, dont give up till you reach your aims, love worth to fight for till the end
i really wish you the best in your love
and please dont hesistate to ask any help

Nadji

thank you for your kind response,

are you algerian?

I did request her father through an sms but not successful. Firstly, i think her father is enthusiastic about an algerian descent and language is a barrier for me. However, my bb writes and speaks good english.

I truly love her so much as she is too.

she is in Algeria with her parents.

Like how the stars and moon created perfectly, my life will be perfect is she is with me.

hello shakespeare
yeah im Algerian

i think he is not only enthusiastic about the algerian descent and language but also scared giving away his beloved daughter to a stranger who never met or spoke with
im sure meeting in person and showing him your love to his daughter will change his fear to happiness(thats the father)
might allah bless your relation

Nadji

If what you have said brother is the fact, then i have no problem with my expression of love towards his daughter. However, i feel that the general mindset of Algerian father to wed to Algerian. How to change this kind of thinking brother.

In the eyes of Allah one who follows the commandment of Allah is the righteous. Am i correct?

Hopefully, what you have said earlier on is the truth. That will be an easy task for me. Inshaallah

i think your feeling is wrong brother, may be your future father in law is thinking like that, i know lots of Algerian girls are married to non Algerian men
and what i told you is only a suggestion because im not her father, but i said "TALKING TO HIM FACE TO FACE MIGHT HELP HIM CHANGE HIS MIND" , and since you are following the commandments of allah almighty, you don't need to worry brother, everything will be fine inshaallah, just step forward toward the happiness

shakespeare61 wrote:

In the eyes of Allah one who follows the commandment of Allah is the righteous. Am i correct?

To say that only one who follows your worldview is right seems, to me, a bit narrow-minded for somebody who lives in a foreign (and non-religious) country and posts on an Expat-forum open to the world.
I hope you can become more tolerant and less judgemental!

thanks brother

Quote
To say that only one who follows your worldview is right seems, to me, a bit narrow-minded for somebody who lives in a foreign (and non-religious) country and posts on an Expat-forum open to the world.
I hope you can become more tolerant and less judgemental!
Unquote

first of all i apologise for being judgemental. Cos i need to answer my brother who is also a muslim. I thought i want to speak my mind.

Apologies

You don't need to apologize - I know you didn't mean it!
It was just a general remark about one of my pet topics: So many of humankind's problems stem from misunderstandings and intolerance. So few people realize that diversity is not only to be tolerated, but a source of enrichment for everyone.
Unfortunately, nationalism and religion are the main causes of this narrow-mindedness. I therefore believe they are not the best guides in life.

thank you for the reply.

but i am not in a position to say anything about what is right and what is wrong. I am lost in this deep love with this Algerian girl. I thought i will not fall in love again.

Now i have to go through this process, what can i do now?

you are welcome man,
Gazzali.maidin! are you the same person who published this thread??

yes

ok
what can you do??
there are alot of options, 2 of them are common,
buy a ticket and fly here to face the reality
forget about your love and live in pain for a while and get your life back
the choice is yours
forgive me if im being bold
good day

hi there

recently my algerian girl has invited me to her house. This was actually requested by her father who wants to see me.

wish me luck brother. I am so happy and i do not know what to do.

Thank you for all the help.

I wish u gotta that luck brother.. I knew it's quietly hard to married an arab woman. Because they'll prefer put their daughter inside their clan rather than lost her forever with a guy who they never knew before. I can understand, nobody wanna loosing the apples of their eye who they raised with all of their life. Because woman will follow their husband, different with a son who will bringing his wife in to their home. My pray, if U really loving her. I hope it's not only a desire for physically attraction. I hope u Love her with all of Ur faith, because of Allah, And U will take care of her as the one who need to be protected and to be loved. And if u get her, please always remember how much she sacrificed for U by leaving her parents to be with U. There's nothing that makes me happy rather than see my sister (a woman) gotta good husband. Because marriage is a slavery for a woman, there's nothing better rather than found a good lord who afraid of Allah. So as a parents, need to be really carefull to choosing the one for raise their heart. If Ur will is Pure, InsyaAllah there's a way. Good Luck! Syukhran!

thank you for those good words and advice. InshaAllah i will be a good husband to her.

Brother i have not seen her even in picture at all...

Just communication via social media. Do you think she is pretty?

shakespeare61 wrote:

Brother i have not seen her even in picture at all...
Just communication via social media. Do you think she is pretty?

You have just been communicating with her online, but are sure she's the right one for you?
You have not met or seen a picture yet - and now you are asking us whether she is pretty?
Love (or, rather, the hormonal imbalance that comes with it) can make a fool out of any man, but you seem to be a specially severe case!

yeah im sure she is pretty in her soul otherwise she would not make you want to fly all this long way to meet her father.....
but excuse me for asking the following, why did not you ask to see her on the webcam or even to see a picture of her?!

for both beppi and nadji22uk

I did ask her to let me see her face. But she said she cannot show her face to me as it is forbidden to show a guy a girl face. It means she is too pretty or not confident of herself fearing i may refuse her.

Correct me if i am wrong what is what here?

In that case, how are you sure she is not a guy making fun of you?
You should come back to your senses before you seriously mess up your life for a phantom!

she has spoken to me over the telephone. Her voice is charismatic and feminine. She has shown me his brother picture and father. Her brother is very handsome. She did not show her mom nor her sis photo.

What do you think now?

There are many scams around, and even more elaborate ones than this.
Be careful and never stop questioning!

why do you think this is a scam?

How do i test this?

Has she asked for cash or bank details?
If so .....................

Even if it's not a scam (which, as Fred wrote, you can detect by requests for money), it might be someone who's making fun or of you (or worse).
If you can, check whether "she" is not a man, or a 60-year-old fart, or just somebody other than what she claims. There are more of these than you'd probably imagine!

Aaahh love is blind 

The story started in fb. After a while we fall in love. She gave her mobile. After a few months our love bloomed.

And i told her i wanted to buy a gift for her. She said she didn't give her address as her father do not like all this. So after a while she told me her mobile has become faulty and ask me to buy one for her like mine. And then she suggested me to purchase one more for her dad, just to make him happy so that he will oblige to our love matter. So i send mobiles to her cousin address. She trusted her cousin.

After the mobile reach her cousin hand, he denied having receiving the mobiles. He took the mobiles. So now she without a mobile and using an old mobile which has no camera. So she is now inviting me to her house upon her father request ( as i also promised to help her auntie baby for an eye operations).

She said she do not have a camera mobile to send all i wanted. She told me to see her in person. Of course she asked me to purchase some other items for her family so that her parents approve our marriage. She said she is loving me because of my big heart and told me not to leave her alone at all times. She truly wanted to marry me.

She said she had fallen in love with me cos i filled her loneliness. She wanted to give everything to me when i am with her there.

She may have fallen in love with you ( or your wallet ) but the sticking point is still her parents and family.
She thinks that you can ingratiate yourself with the family by agreeing to send phones, money for eye operation etc.

She is lonely and she stated that you filled her loneliness. That has nothing to do with love at all. Love based on loneliness will not last.

Quit whilst you can, stop sending money and promising to spend money on family. That is buying love and is not a basis for a long term relationship.

Do you know what why people love each other?

I hope you can give me one if there is any. Well there is nothing wrong to make people feel good by buying them gifts.

Even those couple who love and marry can get divorced in later lives. That is because the husband fail to say " i love you" when he comes back home. Woman need to be anointed with praise. You have to woo them - that is why you call them wo-man.

It is guy's job to make the wife happy. I have all confidence i can do the job properly. Even if it cost me a little money to be expended i am all out to go.

In any case thanks for you observation though not factual.

So she asked you to send valuable items, but to a different address (so it's not traceable - and they promptly "disappeared"). Then she weakened her resistance to closer contact only after you promised more gifts and money for an operation (the standard excuse used by scammers!).
If you go, you will be relived of the gifts, money and illusions. You may also not be safe. DON'T!!!
Walk, no RUN away as fast as you can.
(If you still have any doubt, ask yourself: What has she ever given or sent to you, other than sweet talk to cloud your judgement?)

Complicated!!! 

@shakespeare61

Good luck with the relationship...

is beppi right or wrong?

Bella_Shu wrote:

Complicated!!! 

why do you think it is complicated?

stumpy wrote:

@shakespeare61

Good luck with the relationship...

Is beppi right or wrong?