Take it or leave it?

What help do you need?

Nash1984 wrote:

What help do you need?

some suggestion or how to decide it? thanks

You need to be clearer first.

I think you said he was offering you monthly payments to live with you.
If that reading is correct; you're talking about becoming a prostitute.

I rather hope I'm wrong.

Hello be-one,

If your expat man is offering you money it sounds more like he wants to buy you, not to marry you because he loves you. I'd be very skeptical of any relationship based on money.

Another possible problem is if he is providing you with money there will always be some obligations attached, no matter what he may say now.

If I were you I'd look for somebody else.

  Cheers, 
  William James Woodward – Brazil & Canada Expert - Expat.com Team

Ask yourself these questions: why do you want to marry him ?, what is he asking you ?

Communication is important, just  make sure both of you understand each other
-Dewi-

mas fred wrote:

You need to be clearer first.

I think you said he was offering you monthly payments to live with you.
If that reading is correct; you're talking about becoming a prostitute.

I rather hope I'm wrong.

Hi,thanks for your attention,yes you exactly right,i forgot to wrote he will give for monthly from his pension...;(

wjwoodward wrote:

Hello be-one,

If your expat man is offering you money it sounds more like he wants to buy you, not to marry you because he loves you. I'd be very skeptical of any relationship based on money.

Another possible problem is if he is providing you with money there will always be some obligations attached, no matter what he may say now.

If I were you I'd look for somebody else.
       that's the answer what i need possibly,thanks

[img align=l]http://yoursmiles.org/tsmile/flag/t67118.gif[/url]  Cheers,  [img align=r]http://yoursmiles.org/tsmile/flag/t67054.gif[/url]
  William James Woodward – Brazil & Canada Expert - Expat.com Team

DWSA wrote:

Ask yourself these questions: why do you want to marry him ?, what is he asking you ?

Communication is important, just  make sure both of you understand each other
-Dewi-

Dear Dewi,
  yeah because i love him and i think he love me also and we have a LDR for about 4 years and almost everyday we have a phone call,i mean we always communicating and discussing many things..

It sounds like you barely know the guy. Can you tell us if you've met him already? 4 years is a long time, you should've been able to know his personality.. but if you guys never met (or hardly) then thats different story.
Ask yourself the question " am I comfortable with it? " if you're not, then you should tell him exactly that, tell him you earn your own money, tell him you feel offended.. if you do.

It sounds to me that you are considering it.

Oh, and I just checked your profile and it says you are a single mother.
It is possible that the guy sincerely wants to help you because of your condition. But who am I to judge, I dont know  this guy nor you.

Sophie Fisher wrote:

It sounds like you barely know the guy. Can you tell us if you've met him already? 4 years is a long time, you should've been able to know his personality.. but if you guys never met (or hardly) then thats different story.
Ask yourself the question " am I comfortable with it? " if you're not, then you should tell him exactly that, tell him you earn your own money, tell him you feel offended.. if you do.

It sounds to me that you are considering it.

'i'd met him a few times darling,because we have LDR then we're keep in contact almost every day/week,the problem is i can't expressing my self as like him when i feel uncomfortable..'tq

But you have too. Honesty is above everything.
Actually this is one of the problems with many Indonesians, cant express your true feelings.
If you are serious about this guy, you better start making some adjustments.

Sophie Fisher wrote:

But you have too. Honesty is above everything.
Actually this is one of the problems with many Indonesians, cant express your true feelings.
If you are serious about this guy, you better start making some adjustments.

yes i know it a must,l'll try later when we've meet again lol
anyway thanks for your attention and Have a lovely Sunday to you:)

My advice to you “be-one” is to open up a private discussion with either, or both Dewi (DWSA) or Annie (Sophie Fisher).

They are Indonesian women and with some amount of first hand experience, and you'll be able to be much more private in your discussions with them.

Cheers, and good luck.

Tell him to roll up that $600 and shove it as far up his  [moderated]

HaileyinHongKong wrote:

Tell him to roll up that $600 and shove it as far up his  [moderated]

yup,l'll try when we have discuss about it again,thanks dear

HaileyinHongKong wrote:

Tell him to roll up that $600 and shove it as far up his  [moderated]

I'm not 100% sure where a man's moderated might be but I'm guessing it's a place where the sun doesn't shine.
As a man who has never considered directly paying for sex, I would suggest any man that does probably either:

Has a record of doing so; thus may have disease
Is so horrible, he needs to pay women to live with him.

Neither option makes for a good relationship.

If I wanted to live with a lady, I wouldn't fix a figure but I would do as any gentleman should; pay all the bills and generally do my part.