Moving back with non danish husband...A good idea?

pipi, I'm afraid I could only confirm your husband experience. Having lived here in 3.5 years, I get racism thrown at my face in big and small scale. Don't get me wrong, most of Danes are friendly, but they have these little remarks that what "others" (non Danes) might perceive as rude.

Even they still laugh at my inability to pronounce a certain Danish word, when it's completely unacceptable to do in other culture, for example. You don't laugh at people speaking English wrong, for example- you try to understand, instead.

I'm afraid I couldn't tell all about it here for fear that the entry would be too long but you are welcomed to contact me to discuss about this (and take a look at my blog)

Hi Flipper

Thank you very much for the reply -All I can say is -I am VERY sorry that you have to experience rudeness/rasism/thoughtlessness at the hands of my native culture...I guess I was fearing that that would be the case...
The one thing I do NOT want to do, is to move there and then forever have to apologise for my country men when it is behaviour i find totally unacceptable myself!

At the moment we are also considering moving back to the UK. A country with other short comings but at least no problems being accepted for what you are and no one will laugh at you pronounciation -cause they all pronounce things differently!!!

I had a quick look at you blog -Very nice, great photos!

If you think of anything else that you think might be helpful, i'd love to hear from you again.

All the best,

Pipi

Pipi, there are simply so many things / examples I would like to tell you but like I said, the room isn't enough here for me to write mere. You can send me a private message if you like, that's up to you.

I guess racism exists everywhere but in this case I won't deny that I often complain to my boyfriend about his "landsmænd". The reason behind this I believe is because Denmark is used to be a homogenous country and not used to see foreigners roaming around the street. Dansk Folkeparti and its policy, for example, could give you a glance how SOME Danes see foreigners.

I often get a lot of "remarks" (if I don't want to call it insults") about my look (fordi jeg ligner en thai, og næsten alle danskere tror at thaikvinder er luder osv.)

So, there are many unpleasant things that I'd not rather reveal here LOL
I guess UK has always been a good choice, especially with the diversity of the culture and the foreigners community over there. But if you ever decide to move to DK, Don't be afraid, we do have a circle of foreigners who support each other so it's not going to be as tough as you think

I don't know.  I'd like more sane and interesting company here, so I wouldn't want to persuade an international to stay away.

Roughly half of all the foreigners I know who came here to settle are unhappy with the state of play in Denmark.  Sometimes I wonder if the other half are just deluding themselves, but still, happiness is possible here, and it has less to do with your attitude than your personality and reasons for being here I think.

Try by all means.  But usually people don't notice the cracks in Denmark until the honeymoon period of about three to four years has worn the romance off.  If y'all are seeing the drawbacks to life here already, then why not choose somewhere you are enamored of instead?

Hi Pippi,
I am a Kenyan, brown not olive skinned like your husband.I have visited a number of countries and lived in 3. From my personal experience, I can say that racism, bias and discrimination can be found in every country.

During my 12 years in Denmark, I have met very lovely Danes and also my share of racist Danes.
Immigration and immigrants is a very politicised issue here in Denmark, and the "immigrant discourse" can get quite harsh come elections time. The media also likes to feed the flames every now and then.

In my opinion, the immigrant experience varies from person to person, and much of it depends on country of origin, colour,culture, religion etc.

Nevertheless, I believe that your husband's experience will made easier by the fact that you are Danish and his English accent will be a BIG PLUS!

Here's a link to an ongoing discussion on expat life in Denmark. You will find a variety of opinions.
http://www.cphpost.dk/welcome-home/178- … -home.html

If enough immigrants simply ignore all this nonsense about "integration" and just act is if this really is a pluralist society, you will be fine.  Many danes - generally older and more conservative - try to make you see their world the way they want it (or see it in their heads), not the way it really is.

The fact is that there are many people here who do embrace the idea of pluralism and, whether our politicians like it or not, this country is becoming more pluralist.

So, come and make a contribution.